Afloat and Ashore Part 44
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"Welcome back, my dear boy, welcome back!" added Mr. Hardinge, his voice and manner still retaining their fervour. "I said you _must_--you _would_ be on board, as soon as they reported the sloop in sight, for I judged your heart by my own. Ah! Miles, will the time ever come when Clawbonny will be good enough for you? You have already as much money as you can want, and more will scarce contribute to your happiness."
"Speaking of money, my dear sir," I answered, "while I have to regret the loss of your respectable kinswoman, I may be permitted to congratulate you on the accession to an old family property--I understand you inherit, in your family, all of Mrs. Bradfort's estate-one valuable in amount, and highly acceptable, no doubt, as having belonged to your ancestors."
"No doubt--no doubt--it is just as you say; and I hope these unexpected riches will leave us all as devout servants of G.o.d, as I humbly trust they found us. The property, however, is not mine, but Lucy's; I need not have any reserve with you, though Rupert has hinted it might be prudent not to let the precise state of the case be known, since it might bring a swarm of interested fortune-hunters about the dear girl, and has proposed that we rather favour the notion the estate is to be divided among us. This I cannot do directly, you will perceive, as it would be deception; but one may be silent. With you, however, it is a different matter, and so I tell you the truth at once. I am made executor, and act, of course; and this makes me the more glad to see you, for I find so much business with pounds, s.h.i.+llings and pence draws my mind off from the duties of my holy office, and that I am in danger of becoming selfish and mercenary. A selfish priest, Miles, is as odious a thing as a mercenary woman!"
"Little danger of your ever becoming anything so worldly, my dear sir.
But Grace-you have not mentioned my beloved sister?"
I saw Mr. Hardinge's countenance suddenly change. The expression of joy instantly deserted it, and it wore an air of uncertainty and sadness. A less observant man than the good divine, in all the ordinary concerns of life, did not exist; but it was apparent that he now saw something to trouble him.
"Yes, Grace," he answered, doubtingly; "the dear girl is here, and all alone, and not as blithe and amusing as formerly. I am glad of your return on her account, too, Miles. She is not well, I fear; I would have sent for a physician last week, or the moment I saw her; but she insists on it, there is no need of one. She is frightfully beautiful, Miles! You know how it is with Grace--her countenance always seemed more fitted for heaven than earth; and now it always reminds me of a seraph's that was grieving over the sins of men!"
"I fear, sir, that Rupert's account, then, is true, and that Grace is seriously ill?"
"I hope not, boy--I fervently pray not! She is not as usual--_that_ is true; but her mind, her thoughts, all her inclinations, and, if I may so express it, her energies, seem turned to heaven. There has been an awakening in the spirit of Grace, that is truly wonderful. She reads devout books, meditates, and, I make no doubt, prays, from morn till night. This is the secret of her withdrawal from the world, and her refusing of all Lucy's invitations. You know how the girls love each other--but Grace declines going to Lucy, though she knows that Lucy cannot come to her."
I now understood it all. A weight like that of a mountain fell upon my heart, and I walked on some distance without speaking. To me, the words of my excellent guardian sounded like the knell of a sister I almost wors.h.i.+pped.
"And Grace--does she expect me, now?" I at length ventured to say, though the words were uttered in tones so tremulous, that even the usually un.o.bservant divine perceived the change.
"She does, and delighted she was to hear it. The only thing of a worldly nature that I have heard her express of late, was some anxious, sisterly wish for your speedy return. Grace loves you, Miles, next to her G.o.d!"
Oh! how I wished this were true, but, alas! alas! I knew it was far otherwise!
"I see you are disturbed, my dear boy, on account of what I have said,"
resumed Mr. Hardinge; "probably from serious apprehensions about your sister's health. She is not well, I allow; but it is the effect of mental ailments. The precious creature has had too vivid views of her own sinful nature, and has suffered deeply, I fear. I trust, my conversation and prayers have not been without their effect, through the divine aid, and that she is now more cheerful--nay, she has a.s.sured me within half an hour, if it turned out that you were in the sloop, she should be happy!"
For my life, I could not have conversed longer on the painful subject; I made no reply. As we had still a considerable distance to walk, I was glad to turn the conversation to other subjects, lest I should become unmanned, and sit down to weep in the middle of the road.
"Does Lucy intend to visit Clawbonny, this summer?" I asked, though it seemed strange to me to suppose that the farm was not actually Lucy's home. I am afraid I felt a jealous dislike to the idea that the dear creature should have houses and lands of her own; or any that was not to be derived through me.
"I hope so," answered her father, "though her new duties do not leave Lucy as much her own mistress as I could wish. You saw her, and her brother, Miles, I take it for granted?"
"I met Rupert in the street, sir, and had a short interview with the Mertons and Lucy at the theatre. Young Mr. and old Mrs. Drewett were of the party."
The good divine turned short round to me, and looked as conscious and knowing as one of his singleness of mind and simplicity of habits could look. Had a knife penetrated my flesh, I could not have winced more than I did; still, I affected a manner that was very foreign to my feelings.
"What do you think of this young Mr. Drewett, boy?" asked Mr. Hardinge, with an air of confidential interest, and an earnestness of manner, that, with him, was inseparable from all that concerned his daughter.
"Do you approve?"
"I believe I understand you, sir;--you mean me to infer that Mr. Drewett is a suitor for Miss Hardinge's hand."
"It would be improper to say this much, even to you, Miles, did not Drewett take good care, himself, to let everybody know it."
"Possibly with a view to keep off other pretenders"--I rejoined, with a bitterness I could not control.
Now, Mr. Hardinge was one of the last men in the world to suspect evil.
He looked surprised, therefore, at my remark, and I was probably not much out of the way, in fancying that he looked displeased.
"That is not right, my dear boy," he said, gravely.
"We should try to think the best and not the worst, of our fellow-creatures."--Excellent old man, how faithfully didst thou practise on thy precept!--"It is a wise rule, and a safe one; more particularly in connection with our own weaknesses. Then, it is but natural that Drewett should wish to secure Lucy; and if he adopt no means less manly than the frank avowal of his own attachment, surely there is no ground of complaint."
I was rebuked; and what is more, I felt that the rebuke was merited. As some atonement for my error, I hastened to add--
"Very truly, sir; I admit the unfairness of my remark, and can only atone for it by adding it is quite apparent Mr. Drewett is not influenced by interested motives, since he certainly was attentive to Miss Hardinge previously to Mrs. Bradfort's death, and when he could not possibly have antic.i.p.ated the nature of her will."
"Quite true, Miles, and very properly and justly remarked. Now, to you, who have known Lucy from childhood, and who regard her much as Rupert does, it may not seem so very natural that a young man can love her warmly and strongly, for herself, alone--such is apt to be the effect of brotherly feeling; but I can a.s.sure you, Lucy is really a charming, as we all know she is a most excellent, girl!"
"To whom are you speaking thus, sir! I can a.s.sure you, nothing is easier than for me to conceive how possible it is for any man to love your daughter. As respects Grace, I confess there, is a difference--for I affirm she has always seemed to me too saintly, too much allied to Heaven already, to be subject herself, to the pa.s.sions of earth."
"That is what I have just been telling you, and we must endeavour to overcome and humanize--if I may so express it--Grace's propensity. There is nothing more dangerous to a healthful frame of mind, in a religious point of view, Miles, than excitement--it is disease, and not faith, nor charity, nor hope, nor humility, nor anything that is commanded; but our native weaknesses taking a wrong direction, under a physical impulse, rather than the fruits of repentance, and the succour afforded by the spirit of G.o.d. We nowhere read of any excitement, and howlings and waitings among the apostles."
How could I enlighten the good old man on the subject of my sister's malady? That Grace, with her well-tempered mind, was the victim of religious exaggeration, I did not for a moment believe; but that she had had her heart blighted, her affections withered, her hopes deceived, by Rupert's levity and interestedness, his worldly-mindedness and vanity, I could foresee, and was prepared to learn; though these were facts not to be communicated to the father of the offender. I made no answer, but managed to turn the conversation towards the farm, and those interests about which I could affect an interest that I was very far from feeling, just at that moment. This induced the divine to inquire into the result of my late voyage, and enabled me to collect sufficient fort.i.tude to meet Grace, with the semblance of firmness, at least.
Mr. Hardinge made a preconcerted signal, as soon as he came in view of the house, that apprised its inmates of my arrival; and we knew, while still half a mile from the buildings, that the news had produced a great commotion. All the blacks met us on the little lawn--for the girls, since reaching womanhood, had made this change in the old door-yard--and I had to go through the process of shaking hands with every one of them.
This was done amid hearty bursts of laughter, the mode in which the negroes of that day almost always betrayed their joy, and many a "welcome home, Ma.s.ser Mile!" and "where a Neb got to, dis time, Ma.s.ser Mile?" was asked by more than one; and great was the satisfaction, when I told his generation and race that the faithful fellow would be up with the cart that was to convey my luggage. But, Grace awaited me. I broke through the throng, and entered the house. In the door I was met by Chloe, a girl about my own sister's age, and a sort of cousin of Neb's by the half-blood, who had been preferred of late years to functions somewhat resembling those of a lady's maid. I say of the half-blood; for, to own the truth, few of the New York blacks, in that day, could have taken from their brothers and sisters, under the old _dictum_ of the common law, which declared that none but heirs of the whole blood should inherit. Chloe met me in the door-way, and greeted me with one of her sweetest smiles, as she curtsied, and really looked as pleased as all my slaves did, at seeing their _young_ master again. How they touched my heart, at times, by their manner of talking about "_ole_ Ma.s.ser, and _ole_ Missus," always subjects of regret among negroes who had been well treated by them. Metaphysicians may reason as subtly as they can about the races and colours, and on the apt.i.tude of the black to acquire, but no one can ever persuade me out of the belief of their extraordinary apt.i.tude to love. As between themselves and their masters, their own children and those of the race to which they were subject, I have often seen instances which have partaken of the attachment of the dog to the human family; and cases in which the children of their masters have been preferred to those of their own flesh and blood, were of constant occurrence.
"I hope you been werry well, sah, Ma.s.ser Mile," said Chloe, who had some extra refinement, as the growth of her position.
"Perfectly, my good girl, and I am glad to see you looking so well--you really are growing handsome, Chloe."
"Oh! Ma.s.ser Mile---you so droll!--now you stay home, sah, long time?"
"I am afraid not, Chloe, but one never knows. Where shall I find my sister?"
"Miss Grace tell me come here, Ma.s.ser Mile, and say she wish to see you in de family-room. She wait dere, now, some time."
"Thank you, Chloe; and do you see that no one interrupts us. I have not seen my sister for near a year."
"Sartain, sah; all as you say." Then the girl, whose face shone like a black bottle that had just been dipped in water, showed her brilliant teeth, from ear to ear, laughed outright, looked foolish, after which she looked earnest, when the secret burst out of her heart, in the melodious voice of a young negress, that did not know whether to laugh or to cry--"Where Neb, Ma.s.ser Mile? what he do now; de _fel_-ler!"
"He will kiss you in ten minutes, Chloe; so put the best face on the matter you are able."
"_Dat_ he wont--de sauce-box---Miss Grace teach me better dan _dat_."
I waited to hear no more, but proceeded towards the triangular little room, with steps so hurried and yet so nervous, that I do not remember, ever before to have laid my hand on a lock in a manner so tremulous--I found myself obliged to pause, ere I could muster resolution to open the door, a hope coming over me that the impatience of Grace would save me the trouble, and that I should find her in my arms before I should be called on to exercise any more fort.i.tude. All was still as death, however, within the room, and I opened the door, as if I expected to find one of the bodies I had formerly seen in its coffin, in this last abiding place above ground, of one dead. My sister was on the _causeuse_, literally unable to rise from debility and agitation. I shall not attempt to describe the shock her appearance gave me. I was prepared for a change, but not one that placed her, as my heart instantly announced, so near the grave!
Grace extended both arms, and I threw myself at her side, drew her within my embrace, and folded her to my heart, with the tenderness with which one would have embraced an infant. In this situation we both wept violently, and I am not ashamed to say that I sobbed like a child. I dare say five minutes pa.s.sed in this way, without either of us speaking a word.
"A merciful and all gracious G.o.d be praised! You are restored to me in time, Miles!" murmured my sister, at length. "I was afraid it might be too late."
"Grace!--Grace!--What means this, love?--my precious, my only, my most dearly beloved sister, why do I find you thus?"
"Is it necessary to speak, Miles?--cannot you see?--_do_ you not see, and understand it all?"
The fervent pressure I gave my sister, announced how plainly I comprehended the whole history. That Grace could ever love, and forget, I did not believe; but, that her tenderness for Rupert--one whom I knew for so frivolous and selfish a being, should reduce her to this terrible state, I had not indeed foreseen as a thing possible. Little did I then understand how confidingly a woman loves, and how apt she is to endow the being of her choice with all the qualities se could wish him to possess. In the anguish of my soul I muttered, loud enough to be heard, "the heartless villain!"
Grace instantly rose from my arms. At that moment, she looked more like a creature of heaven, than one that was still connected with this wicked world. Her beauty could scarcely be called impaired, though I dreaded that she would be s.n.a.t.c.hed away from me in the course of the interview; so frail and weak did it appear was her hold of life. In some respects I never saw her more lovely than she seemed on this very occasion.
Afloat and Ashore Part 44
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Afloat and Ashore Part 44 summary
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