All That Goes Up Part 3

Professor Jordan took the knife, got up close to the plate, gave it a toss, and plunk! It flew over the plate and went straight to the ceiling! And stuck!

"Well, thank goodness, we know it's the present combination of voltage and frequency, and not a series of changes," Jim said, relieved.

"Yes, and size and shape apparently have little to do with it too,"

the professor answered. "Now all we have to do is find out why. That's our problem."

"And how long it lasts too," said Jim, glancing up at me. Then turning to the professor; "Sir, I've been wondering what you think of the idea that maybe these plates change the electrical charge of whatever object is placed on them, or over them."

"I had that thought too, Jim, when I found out we couldn't turn that plate off. Any ideas how we might go about grounding or dissipating the charge?"

"Or getting me down from here? I don't know if you or Jim realize it, but old Mother Nature is going to make things rather uncomfortable for me pretty soon. I've been up here for almost eight hours already, and I'm getting a bit uneasy, to say the least."

For the first time the professor's eyes crinkled a bit at the corners, and looking up at me, he chuckled, "Mr. Wilson, you've brought up a rather touchy subject, and we'll hurry as fast as we can."

Mary came in then with some more sandwiches and coffee, and I went through the same routine with the straw, only this time I got choked.

Thank Heaven I did! That sounds funny, but while I was coughing and sputtering, spewing coffee all over the place, Jim had walked over so that he was right under me. He stood for a moment watching me sputter, then let out a whoop and hollered.

"Hey! Dad! Professor! Mom! I've got it! I've got it." He paused a second, then, "I hope...."

I was still sputtering, but Mary and Professor Jordan both grabbed him and started asking questions.... "What are you talking about? What's your idea?"

"Professor, did you see what happened to the coffee?"

"Your father got choked, why?"

"When he sputtered, did you see what happened? The coffee went _up_!"

"Well, yes, it did. But I don't see.... By jove! Wait a minute! I see what you're driving at!" And turning to Mary, the professor added, "Mrs. Wilson, do you have a garden hose long enough to reach into this room?"

Mary was shocked. I was still listening between sputters.

"Why, yes, we have. What are you going to do?"

"I hate to tell you this, Mother," Jim said, "But if Professor Jordan is going to do what I think he's going to do, you're not going to be very happy about it. Neither is Dad."

"But we hope to get Mr. Wilson down," the professor said, "Even though it may get a little damp in here."

"If you can get Ralph down, I won't mind how damp it gets," said Mary.

And turning to Johnny, who was standing open-mouthed, "Johnny, will you hook up the hose?"

"Yes, Johnny, and run it through the window so it'll come inside the room," Jim explained, quickly.

This whole thing sounded like Greek to me, but by now I had recovered from the sputtering spell, and if a garden hose run through the bedroom window would get me down I was certainly in favor of it. "Will this garden hose scheme you both seem to have thought of really work?"

"We hope so, Dad. It's going to make a mess in my room, but it's worth a try."

"What do I do, climb down it?"

"In effect you do," said the professor. "We'll know in a little while, I hope."

"Will someone unhook the screen?" Johnny was outside.

Jim unhooked the screen and pulled the hose into the room. "Do you want to try it, Professor?"

"Yes, but first, let's clear things out of the way."

"Hey!" I hollered. "You're not going to turn that hose on in here are you?"

The professor chuckled. "Hope you don't mind too much, but we hope it'll get you down."

"Well, I sure don't see...."

"Dad, the professor and I had the same idea. Maybe I can explain it ...

you see, apparently anything you come in contact with takes on a bit of your 'charge.' In the case of the coffee, the small drops became charged and went up. I imagine that the plates and cups picked up a small charge too, while you held them, but it wasn't enough to make them rise. Is that about right, Professor?"

"It seems that way, Jim. Anyway, it's worth a try." The professor looked up at me, "Mr. Wilson, I'm afraid you aren't going to care much for this. As soon as we clear the room a bit I'm going to turn the hose on you."

My mouth dropped open. "Turn the ho...?"

"Yes.... You see, if whatever you touch picks up a bit of the charge, then about the quickest way to 'discharge' you would be to touch you with a large volume of something. Water sounds logical, doesn't it?"

"Well, I suppose so," I mumbled. "But, there must be something ...

some other way...."

"There may be, Dad," Jim said, "but you want to get down from there fast, don't you? OK! Here we go!"

So, Jim turned the water on and in a few minutes of course, I was soaked through my bathrobe and pajamas, right to the skin. Johnny was looking through the window laughing fit to kill, and with a look of horror on her face, Mary was watching the water cascading across the ceiling and down into the room. Jim and Professor Jordan were watching me like hawks. Waiting for me to fall, I guess. Fortunately the weather was warm, because the water certainly wasn't. This must have gone on for an hour, but it apparently wasn't, because when they turned the water off, Jim said to the professor, "I hope you timed that, sir. I forgot to."

The professor had, and it turned out to be about ten minutes. He looked up at me, "Do you feel any lighter?"

"What do you mean, lighter?"

He grinned. "I mean can you push yourself away from the ceiling?"

I rolled over on my side and tried to push. By golly! I _did_ seem to move a little easier! "I may be a little lighter, Professor, or maybe it's my imagination, but turn that hose on again!"

Splat! On it came, and it's been on and off and on and off for, let me see, this must be the third day now. And I don't mind telling you I'm not going to need a bath for at least two months when I get down.

When I get down! Do you know where I am right now? I'm about two feet from the ceiling, which puts me still ten feet from the floor ...

hanging there in the air like the a.s.sistant to an Indian fakir! Only this is no trick.

Oh, it's not so bad now; I'm wearing swimming trunks and Jim and Professor Jordan with the a.s.sistance of Johnny and Mary, rigged a sort of trough arrangement to carry the 'charged' water out of the window and up into the sky. The water that didn't pick up a charge and fell to the floor is being pumped out the window with a hand pump. Oh, yes, they had to dam up the doorway to keep the rest of the house from being inundated. And I shudder every time I think how much damage has been done to Jim's bedroom. I'm coming down though, slowly, and Professor Jordan has it figured that at the present rate it's going to take five to six more days. I don't know how he came to that conclusion, but I sure hope he's right and hasn't underestimated. The constant soaking has my skin looking like damp corduroy. All over too.

What about the transformer and plate? Well, I believe Professor Jordan is going to take a leave of absence and he and Jim are going to do some full time research on the device, whatever it is. They both think it has many possibilities. So do I, but I'm going to keep my feet on the ground. If they ever get there!