Wappin' Wharf Part 16

DUKE: She is still headed on. Her nose is still pointin' toward the cliff.

CAPTAIN: What 's that?

DUKE: I hears the rattlin' o' chains. She 's droppin' anchor. She has sniffed the willainy. Her anchor 's down. She 's saved hisself. Blow me, she 's saved hisself.

CAPTAIN: Yer can hang me ter a gibbet.

PATCH: Yer can rot me bones.

DARLIN': Me heart 's gone palpy.

DUKE: What done it? What done it? I asks yer.

(_At this point let us hope that the curtain does not stick._)

[Ill.u.s.tration: "What done it? I asks yer"]

[Ill.u.s.tration: ACT III]

ACT III

_The scene is the same as before. We have given up all hope of a pirate s.h.i.+p rocking on the sea. Our plot still twists us around its little finger. The curtain rises on the tableau of the second act. Old Petey shows again at the window to the right._

DUKE: What done it? What done it? I asks yer.

PATCH: Jest when everythin' was goin' pretty.

CAPTAIN: Jest when she was about ter hit.

DARLIN': Me heart near stopped--I was that excited.

(_The pirates sit in deep dejection._)

DUKE: The mystery o' this business is how the blinkin' lantern went out.

CAPTAIN: Ol' Petey done his part.

PATCH: He doused herself in time.

CAPTAIN: It was the lantern done it.

DUKE: When there were n't no light at all, the Royal 'Arry, she jest sniffed willainy and dropped anchor.

PATCH: I was repeatin' Smash yer devil! Smash yer devil!--kinder hurryin' her on.

DARLIN': I was sayin' Now I lay me--throbbin' with excitement.

DUKE: It was n't ile. I put ile in the lantern meself. Captain, yer seen me put in ile.

CAPTAIN: I seen yer. And I swished it meself ter be sure.

PATCH: Nothin 's been right since that ol' lady hanged me ter a gibbet.

CAPTAIN: There we was watchin'--

PATCH: Pop!

CAPTAIN: And all of a sudden--quicker 'n seven devils--the bloomin'

lantern went all ter pieces. It 's grog, I says. Snakes is next. It were a comfert to the ol' Captain ter know that all o' yer seen it. I seen a yeller rhinoceros once, runnin' along with purple mice--all alone I seen it--and it kinder sickened me o' rum.

PATCH: Does yer think the lantern exploded?

DUKE: Did yer ever hear o' a s.h.i.+p's lantern explodin'? I asks yer, Captain.

CAPTAIN: Yer talks silly, Patch. That lantern has hung fer twenty year on ol' Flint's s.h.i.+p--swingin' easy and contented all 'round the Horn--and it ain 't never exploded once.

DUKE: Swabs' lanterns explode, stoopid. s.h.i.+ps' lanterns don 't.

Captain, I feels as mournful as when Flint's clock did n't tick no more and we knowed he was took by the blessed angels.

CAPTAIN: I ain 't meself as gay as a cuckoo--not quite I ain 't.

PATCH: Ever since that ol' lady--

DUKE: Lay off on that ol' lady!

(_They sit in silence, in dejection. All stare stupidly at the floor.

For a moment it seems as if nothing more will be said and the audience might as well go home. But presently the Duke sees something at the rear of the cabin. He looks as you or I would look if we saw a yellow elephant taking its after-dinner coffee in the sitting-room; but, as he is a pirate, he is not frightened--merely interested and intent. He brushes his hand before his eyes, to make sure it is no delusion--not grog or rum. Then he rises softly. He crosses to the window. Very gently he touches the gla.s.s. He finds it is really broken. He loosens a piece of the shattered gla.s.s. The others are sunk in such melancholy that they do not observe him._

_He gazes through the window, studying the direction of the broken s.h.i.+p's lantern. He traces the angle with his finger. The gesture ends with an accusing finger pointing at Red Joe. He whistles softly. For a moment his eye rests upon the gun, which leans against the clock. He has guessed the riddle. He advances casually, but with dirk in hand.

He comes in front of Joe. Suddenly he presses the blade of his dirk against Joe's stomach._)

DUKE: Captain! Captain! Quick! Tie him up!

(_Joe is bound again with rope._)

DUKE: It 's him that done it. It 's Red Joe.

CAPTAIN: How did he get loose?

DUKE: (_as he points to the knife on the floor_). Does yer see that knife? Does yer see Joe? I 'm tellin' yer. It was him shot out the lantern.

PATCH: Did n't I help ter tie him meself?

DUKE: Askin' yer pardon, Captain, but you and Patch has the brains o'