The Best Nonsense Verses Part 7

[_Oliver Herford_

NONSENSE VERSES

1

The Window has Four little Panes: But One have I; The Window-Panes are in its sash,-- I wonder why!

2

 

My Feet they haul me 'round the House: They hoist me up the Stairs; I only have to steer them and They ride me everywheres.

3

Remarkable truly, is Art!

See--Elliptical wheels on a Cart!

It looks very fair In the Picture up there; But imagine the Ride when you start!

4

I'd rather have fingers than Toes; I'd rather have Ears than a Nose: And as for my hair, I'm glad it's all there, I'll be awfully sad when it goes!

5

I wish that my Room had a floor; I don't so much care for a Door, But this walking around Without touching the ground Is getting to be quite a bore!

[_Gelett Burgess_

VERS NONSENSIQUES

I am gai. I am poet. I dvell Rupert Street, at the fifth. I am svell.

And I sing tralala And I love my mamma, And the English, I speaks him quite well!

2

"Ca.s.sez-vous, ca.s.sez-vous, ca.s.sez-vous, O mer, sur vos froids gris cilloux!"

Ainsi traduisit Laure Au profit d'Isadore (Bon jeune homme, et son futur epoux.)

3

Il existe une espinstere a Tours Un peu vite, et qui portait toujours Un ulster peau-de-phoque, Un chapeau bilicoque, Et des nicrebocquers en velours.

4

Un marin naufrage (de Doncastre) Pour priere, au milieu du desastre Repetait a genoux Ces mots simples et doux:-- "Scintellez, scintellez, pet.i.t astre!"

[_George du Maurier_

NONSENSE VERSES

1

There was a small boy of Quebec, Who was buried in snow to his neck: When they said, "Are you friz?"

He replied, "Yes I is-- But we don't call this cold in Quebec!"

[_Rudyard Kipling_

2

There was an old man of St. Bees, Who was stung in the arm by a wasp: When they asked, "Does it hurt?"

He replied, "No it doesn't, But I thought all the while 'twas a Hornet!"

[_W.S. Gilbert_

VARIA.

1

There was an old man of Tarentum Who gnashed his false teeth till he bent 'em; And when asked for the cost Of what he had lost, Said, "I really can't tell, for I rent 'em!"

2

A lady there was of Antigua, Who said to her spouse, "What a pig you are!"

He answered, "My queen Is it manners you mean, Or do you refer to my figure?"

3

There were three young women of Birmingham, And I know a sad story concerning 'em; They stuck needles and pins In the right rev'rend s.h.i.+ns Of the Bishop engaged in confirming 'em!