Dick Merriwell's Pranks Part 54

"Sold it? Sold your wives, colonel?"

"Certainly, suh. That was the proper course to pursue, professah. There were plenty of others who were ready to buy, in case you had a bargain to offah, and-as I was anxious to sell-a new recruit in the army obtained my harem fo' a mere song. Of course, I regretted to part with my beautiful wives, and especially with Fatima, my favorite; but I could not take them with me, on account of the laws of the United States, and so, suh, I kissed Fatima good-by and turned the whole lot ovah to my successor."

"Er-er-ahem! Colonel, does the custom of selling harems still continue in this country, can you say?"

"Why, certainly, suh, to a certain extent, suh. Are yo' thinking of making a purchase, suh?"

"Well, I-er-ahem!-I don't know, exactly. You see, I-I'm likely to investigate. I wouldn't mind looking a few harems over. If I found a bargain-er-ahem!-I might-- Well, you understand, colonel."

"The old reprobate!" exclaimed d.i.c.k, in a whisper. "So this is what he's up to! This is why he wants to take an excursion trip up the Nile! I think I'll have to find a way to teach him a lesson."

"Yes, suh," said the voice of the professor's companion; "I think I understand, suh. But it is possible, professah, that you do not understand yo'self, suh. When yo' were a boy, did yo' evah trade jackknives or anything of that sort, 'unsight, unseen,' suh?"

"Why, yes, I--"

"Well, suh, that's the rule in purchasing a harem. It is the law of the country, professah, that no one save the ownah of a harem shall evah see the uncovered faces of its inmates. If yo' make a purchase, yo' have to take a chance on it. Yo' may see the ladies in advance, but yo'll not be permitted to see their faces."

"He! he!" again laughed Gunn. "That will make the game all the more fascinating. It adds an element of mystery and suspense. It piques me.

If you don't mind, colonel, I'll have another nip from the decanter. I take it as a tonic, you know-merely as a tonic."

"Certainly, suh; help yo'self, suh."

"Do you think, colonel, that you might a.s.sist me in investigating a few harems?"

"Why, yes, suh, it is quite likely I might. Having an extensive acquaintance in Cairo, it will be easy fo' me to help yo'. I'll find out what harems are on the market, suh. Drink hearty, professah."

"Well, here is luck and hoping I'll strike a good bargain."

d.i.c.k did not linger longer. He returned to his room and was just in time to find Brad coming in from Budthorne's room.

"The old salamander!" cried the Texan, after listening to d.i.c.k's story.

"The old Mormon! Why, he's married! He has a wife in the United States."

"Exactly."

"What does he think he's doing, anyhow?"

"He thinks he's going to have a gay time in Cairo, evidently."

"We'll have to stop it, pard."

"Oh, no!"

"What?"

"On the contrary, we'll have to help it along."

"Hey?" shouted Buckhart, aghast. "Whatever do you mean?"

"Just what I said."

"But it's a crime! It's scandalous! I'm astonished at you!"

"It's not a crime in this country to be the proprietor of a harem."

"But--"

"We're in Egypt, and the law of the land--"

"Look here, d.i.c.k Merriwell," blazed Brad, in sudden indignation. "I've generally backed you up in anything you've said or done; but, by the everlasting Rockies, if you've become so depraved and degenerate that you can regard an affair like this as anything but a crime, I want you to understand that I think you've lost your senses!"

d.i.c.k dropped on a chair and laughed heartily.

"I mean it!" roared the Texan. "It's shameful! You hear me chirp! That doddering old chump has a wife in America! Now he wants to buy a harem in Egypt! And you're willing to aid him in his polygamous design! Waugh!

Laugh! laugh! But you're not the sort of pard I took you for! This is my first disappointment in you! I'll block the old roue's game, I will!

I'll spoil his scheme, or I'm not the Unbranded Maverick of the Rio Pecos!"

The Texan was greatly wrought up. He stamped up and down the room in a tempest, while Merriwell continued to laugh.

"I don't see where the joke comes in!" snarled Buckhart. "Ha, ha! Isn't it funny? I suppose you'll be in for buying a harem next? That's a fine idea! Perhaps you'll take a half interest in old Gunn's bunch of beauties? Wow! I sure am a heap disgusted!"

"Cool down a little, Brad," said d.i.c.k, still smiling. "I hardly think I'll invest in a harem. Why, you excitable longhorn, don't you know harems are not sold that way here?"

"Hey?"

"A man may purchase wives for his harem, but he can't sell the whole outfit when he gets tired of it."

"Can't?"

"Of course not."

"Then what-what--"

"The whole thing is some kind of a game."

"But you-you said you were going to help the business along."

"So I am. I want to teach the professor a lesson."

"I don't think I catch on, d.i.c.k."

"Let me tell you something."

"Fire away."

"To begin with, I don't believe Colonel Stringer ever was in the Egyptian service."

"Don't you?"