Journeys Through Bookland Volume Iii Part 5

The Red Queen said, "That's a poor thin way of doing things. Now HERE, we mostly have days and nights two or three at a time, and sometimes in the winter we take as many as five nights together--for warmth, you know."

"Are five nights warmer than one night, then?" Alice ventured to ask.

"Five times as warm, of course."

"But they should be five times as COLD, by the same rule--"

"Just so!" cried the Red Queen. "Five times as warm, AND five times as cold--just as I'm five times as rich as you are, AND five times as clever!"

Alice sighed and gave it up. "It's exactly like a riddle with no answer!" she thought.

"Humpty Dumpty saw it too," the White Queen went on in a low voice, more as if she were talking to herself. "He came to the door with a corkscrew in his hand--"

"What did he want?" said the Red Queen.

"He said he WOULD come in," the White Queen went on, "because he was looking for a hippopotamus. Now, as it happened, there wasn't such a thing in the house, that morning."

"Is there generally?" Alice asked in an astonished tone.

"Well, only on Thursdays," said the Queen.

"I know what he came for," said Alice: "he wanted to punish the fish, because--"

Here the White Queen began again. "It was SUCH a thunderstorm, you can't think!" ("She NEVER could, you know," said the Red Queen.) "And part of the roof came off, and ever so much thunder got in--and it went rolling round the room in great lumps--and knocking over the tables and things--till I was so frightened, I couldn't remember my own name!"

Alice thought to herself, "I never should TRY to remember my name in the middle of an accident! Where would be the use of it?" but she did not say this aloud, for fear of hurting the poor Queen's feelings.

"Your Majesty must excuse her," the Red Queen said to Alice, taking one of the White Queen's hands in her own, and gently stroking it: "she means well, but she can't help saying foolish things, as a general rule."

The White Queen looked timidly at Alice, who felt she OUGHT to say something kind, but really couldn't think of anything at the moment.

"She never was really well brought up," the Red Queen went on: "but it's amazing how good-tempered she is! Pat her on the head, and see how pleased she'll be!" But this was more than Alice had courage to do.

"A little kindness--and putting her hair in papers--would do wonders with her--"

The White Queen gave a deep sigh, and laid her head on Alice's shoulder. "I AM so sleepy!" she moaned.

"She's tired, poor thing!" said the Red Queen. "Smooth her hair--lend her your nightcap--and sing her a soothing lullaby."

"I haven't got a nightcap with me," said Alice, as she tried to obey the first direction: "and I don't know any soothing lullabies."

"I must do it myself, then," said the Red Queen, and she began:

"Hush-a-by, lady, in Alice's lap!

Till the feast's ready, we've time for a nap: When the feast's over, we'll go to the ball-- Red Queen, and White Queen, and Alice, and all!"

"And now you know the words," she added, as she put her head down on Alice's other shoulder, "just sing it through to ME; I'm getting sleepy, too." In another moment both queens were fast asleep, and snoring loud.

[Ill.u.s.tration: TWO QUEENS ASLEEP AT ONCE]

"What AM I to do?" exclaimed Alice, looking about in great perplexity, as first one round head, and then the other, rolled down from her shoulder, and lay like a heavy lump in her lap. "I don't think it EVER happened before, that any one had to take care of two queens asleep at once! No, not in all the history of England--it couldn't, you know, because there never was more than one queen at a time. Do wake up, you heavy things!" she went on in an impatient tone; but there was no answer but a gentle snoring.

THE LEPRECAUN

By WILLIAM ALLINGHAM

NOTE.--The Leprecaun, or Shoemaker, is one of the solitary fairies of Ireland. He is a little fellow who wears a red coat with seven b.u.t.tons in each row, and a c.o.c.ked or pointed hat, on the point of which he often spins round like a top. You may often see him under the hedge mending shoes; where, if you are sharp enough, you may catch him and make him give up the big crocks of gold, of which the little miser has saved many and many. But you must be careful, for if after you have seen him once you take your eyes off him for a single instant, he vanishes into the air like a wreath of smoke.

Little cowboy, what have you heard, Up on the lonely rath's green mound?

Only the plaintive yellow-bird Singing in sultry fields around?

Chary, chary, chary, chee-e!

Only the gra.s.shopper and the bee?

"Tip-tap, rip-rap, Tick-a-tack-too!

Scarlet leather sewn together, This will make a shoe.

Left, right, pull it tight, Summer days are warm; Underground in winter, Laughing at the storm!"

Lay your ear close to the hill: Do you not catch the tiny clamor, Busy click of an elfin hammer, Voice of the Leprecaun singing shrill As he merrily plies his trade?

He's a span And a quarter in height; Get him in sight, hold him fast, And you're a made Man!

You watch your cattle the summer day, Sup on potatoes, sleep in the hay; How should you like to roll in your carriage And look for a d.u.c.h.ess's daughter in marriage?

Seize the shoemaker, so you may!

"Big boots a-hunting, Sandals in the hall, White for a wedding feast, And pink for a ball: This way, that way, So we make a shoe, Getting rich every st.i.tch, Tick-tack-too!"

Nine and ninety treasure crocks This keen miser-fairy hath, Hid in mountain, wood and rocks, Ruin and round-tower, cave or rath, And where the cormorants build; From the times of old Guarded by him; Each of them filled Full to the brim With gold!

[Ill.u.s.tration: THIS WAY, THAT WAY, SO WE MAKE A SHOE]

I caught him at work one day myself, In the castle ditch where the foxglove grows, A wrinkled, wizened and bearded elf, Spectacles stuck on the top of his nose, Silver buckles to his hose, Leather ap.r.o.n, shoe in his lap.

"Rip-rap, tip-tap, Tick-tack-too!

A grig stepped upon my cap, Away the moth flew.

Buskins for a fairy prince, Brogues for his son, Pay me well, pay me well, When the job's done."

The rogue was mine beyond a doubt; I stared at him, he stared at me!

"Servant, Sir!" "Humph," said he, And pulled a snuff-box out; He took a long pinch, looked better pleased, The queer little Leprecaun, Offered the box with a whimsical grace, Pouf! he flung the dust in my face, And, while I sneezed, was gone!

THE WALRUS AND THE CARPENTER

By LEWIS CARROLL

The sun was s.h.i.+ning on the sea, s.h.i.+ning with all his might: He did his very best to make The billows smooth and bright-- And this was odd, because it was The middle of the night.

The moon was s.h.i.+ning sulkily, Because she thought the sun Had got no business to be there After the day was done-- "It's very rude of him," she said, "To come and spoil the fun!"