John Bull Part 3

_Mrs. Brul._ [_Apart to DENNIS._] What have you said about the brandy bottle?

_Dennis._ [_Apart._] I told him you broke it, one day.

_Mrs. Brul._ [_Apart._] Ah! I am always the shelter for your sins.

_Dennis._ Hus.h.!.+--[_To PERG._] You know, sir, I--hem!--I mention'd to you poor Mrs. Brulgruddery's misfortune.

_Pereg._ Ha, ha! you did indeed, friend.

_Mrs. Brul._ I am very sorry, sir, but--

_Dennis._ Be asy, my lambkin! the jontleman excuses it. You are not the first that has crack'd a bottle, you know.--Here's your beer, sir. [_Taking it from his Wife._] I'm not of a blus.h.i.+ng nation, or I'd be shame-faced to give it him.--[_Aside._] My jewel, the jontleman was asking after one Mr. Thornberry.

[_Delaying to give the Beer._

_Mrs. Brul._ What! old Job Thornberry of Penzance, sir?

_Pereg._ The very same. You know him, then?

_Mrs. Brul._ Very well, by hearsay, sir. He has lived there upwards of thirty years. A very thriving man now, and well to do in the world;--as others might be, too, if they would but follow my advice.

[_To DENNIS._

_Pereg._ I rejoice to hear it. Give me the beer, Landlord; I'll drink his health in humble malt, then hasten to visit him.

_Dennis. [Aside._] By St. Patrick, then, you'll make wry faces on the road. [_Gives him the mug._

[_As PEREGRINE is about to drink, a Shriek is heard at a small Distance._

_Pereg._ Ha! the voice of a female in distress? Then 'tis a man's business to fly to her protection.

[_Dashes the Mug on the Ground. Exit._

_Mrs. Brul._ Wheugh! what a whirligigg! Why, Dennis, the man's mad!

_Dennis._ I think that thing.

_Mrs. Brul._ He has thrown down all the beer, before he tasted a drop.

_Dennis._ That's it: if he had chuck'd it away afterwards, I shou'dn't have wonder'd.

_Mrs. Brul._ Here he comes again;--and, I declare, with a young woman leaning on his shoulder.

_Dennis._ A young woman! let me have a bit of a peep. [_Looking out._] Och, the crater! Och, the--

_Mrs. Brul._ Heyday! I should'n't have thought of your peeping after a young woman, indeed!

_Dennis._ Be asy, Mrs. Brulgruddery! it's a way we have in Ireland.--There's a face!

_Mrs. Brul._ Well, and hav'n't I a face, pray?

_Dennis._ That you have, my lambkin! You have had one these fifty years, I'll bound for you.

_Mrs. Brul._ Fifty years! you are the greatest brute that ever dug potatoes.

_Re-enter PEREGRINE, supporting MARY._

_Pereg._ This way. Cheer your spirits; the ruffian with whom I saw you struggling, has fled across the Heath; but his speed prevented my saving your property. Was your money, too, in the parcel with your clothes?

_Mary._ All I possessed in the world, sir;--and he has so frighten'd me!--Indeed. I thank you, sir; indeed I do!

_Pereg._ Come, come, compose yourself. Whither are you going, pretty one?

_Mary._ I must not tell, sir.

_Pereg._ Then whither do you come from?

_Mary._ No body must know, sir.

_Pereg._ Umph! Then your proceedings, child, are a secret?

_Mary._ Yes, sir.

_Pereg._ Yet you appear to need a friend to direct them. A heath is a rare place to find one: in the absence of a better, confide in me.

_Mary._ You forget that you are a stranger, sir.

_Pereg._ I always do--when the defenceless want my a.s.sistance.

_Mary._ But, perhaps you might betray me, sir.

_Pereg._ Never--by the honour of a man!

_Mary._ Pray don't swear by that, sir! for, then, you'll betray me, I'm certain.

_Pereg._ Have you ever suffered from treachery, then, poor innocence?

_Mary._ Yes, sir.

_Pereg._ And may not one of your own s.e.x have been treacherous to you?

_Mary._ No, sir; I'm very sure he was a man.

_Dennis._ Oh, the blackguard!

_Mrs. Brul._ Hold your tongue, do!

_Pereg._ Listen to me, child. I would proffer you friends.h.i.+p, for your own sake--for the sake of benevolence. When ages, indeed, are nearly equal, nature is p.r.o.ne to breathe so warmly on the blossoms of a friends.h.i.+p between the s.e.xes, that the fruit is desire; but time, fair one, is scattering snow on my temples, while Hebe waves her freshest ringlets over yours. Rely, then, on one who has numbered years sufficient to correct his pa.s.sions; who has encountered difficulties enough to teach him sympathy; and who would stretch forth his hand to a wandering female, and shelter her like a father.

_Mary._ Oh, sir! I do want protection sadly indeed! I am very miserable! [_Weeping._