Six Plays by Lady Florence Henrietta Fisher Darwin Part 37

WILLIAM. Yes.

JOHN. Why, I count as I have went a score of times, master.

WILLIAM. A score of times, John! But that was before you were got to the age you are now?

JOHN. Before that, and now, master.

WILLIAM. And now, John?

JOHN. To be sure, master.

WILLIAM. Then you know how 'tis done?

JOHN. Ah, that I does, master.

WILLIAM. Well, John, you're the man for me.

JOHN. Lord bless us, master, but what have you to do with courting?

WILLIAM. You may well ask me, John. Why, look you here--until this very morning, you would say I was a quiet and a peaceable man, with the right place for everything and everything in its place.

JOHN. Ah, and that you was, Master William. And a time for all things too, and a decenter, proper gentleman no man ever served-- that's truth.

WILLIAM. Ah, John--the mistress has set her will to change all this.

JOHN. Now, you'd knock me down with a feather.

WILLIAM. That she has, John. I've got to set out courting--a thing I've never thought to do in all my living days.

JOHN. That I'll be bound you have not, Master William, though a finer gentleman than yourself is not to be found in all the country side.

WILLIAM. [With shy eagerness.] Is that how I appear to you, John?

JOHN. Ah, and that you does, master. And 'tis the wonder with all for miles around as how you've been and kept yourself to yourself like this, so many years.

WILLIAM. Well, John, it appears that I'm to pa.s.s out of my own keeping. My Sunday clothes are all laid out upon the bed.

JOHN. Bless my soul, Master William, and 'tis but Thursday too.

WILLIAM. Isn't that a proper day for this sort of business, John?

JOHN. I've always been used to Sat.u.r.day myself, but with a gentleman 'tis different like.

WILLIAM. Well, John, there's nothing in this day or that as far as I can see. A bad job is a bad job, no matter what, and the day of it does make but very little difference.

JOHN. You're right there, master. But if I may be so bold, where is it as you be going off courting this afternoon?

WILLIAM. Ah--now you and me will have a straight talk one with another--for 'tis to you I look, John, for to pull me out of this fix where the mistress has gone and put me.

JOHN. And that I'll do, master--with all the will in the world.

WILLIAM. Well then, John, 'tis to be one of those maids from strange parts who are come to live at old Luther's, up yonder.

JOHN. Ah, I seed the pair of them in church last Sunday. Fine maids, the both of them, and properly suitable if you was to ask me.

WILLIAM. 'Tis only the one I've got to court, John.

JOHN. And I reckon that's one too many, Master William.

WILLIAM. You're right there, John. 'Tis Mistress Julia I've to go at.

JOHN. And which of the pair would that be, Master William?

WILLIAM. That one with the cherry colour ribbons to her gown, I believe.

JOHN. Ah, t'other was plainer in her dressing, and did keep the head of her bent smartish low on her book, so that a man couldn't get a fair look upon she.

WILLIAM. That would be the housekeeper or summat. 'Tis Julia, who has the old man's money, I'm to court.

JOHN. Well, master, I'll come along with you a bit of the road, to keep your heart up like.

WILLIAM. You must do more than that for me, John. You've got to learn me how the courting is done before I set off.

JOHN. Why, master, courting baint a thing what wants much learning, that's the truth.

WILLIAM. 'Tis all new to me, John. I'm blessed if I know how to commence. Why, the thought of it at once sends me hot all over; and then as cold again.

JOHN. You start and get your clothes on, master. 'Tis half the battle--clothes. What a man cannot bring out of his mouth of a Sat.u.r.day will fall out easy as anything on the Sunday with his best coat to his back.

WILLIAM. No, John. The clothes won't help me in this fix. You must tell me how to start once I get to the farm and am by the door.

JOHN. You might take a nosegay with you, master.

WILLIAM. I might. And yet, 'tis a pity to cut the blooms for naught.

JOHN. I always takes a nosegay with me, of a Sat.u.r.day night.

WILLIAM. Why, John, who is it that you are courting then?

JOHN. 'Tis that wench Susan, since you ask me, master. But not a word of it to th' old mistress.

WILLIAM. I'll not mention it, John.

JOHN. Thank you kindly, master.

WILLIAM. And now, John, when the nosegay's all gathered and the flowers bunched, what else should I do?

JOHN. Well, then you gives it her when you gets to the door. And very like she'll ask you into the parlour, seeing as you be a particular fine looking gentleman.