Book of Etiquette Volume Ii Part 19

THE WELL-DRESSED WOMAN

Someone once said there is nothing more beautiful than a beautiful woman. A pretty sentiment, but not quite complete. We would have it read: There is nothing more beautiful than a beautiful woman well-dressed.

When is a woman well-dressed? It cannot be when she is merely fas.h.i.+onable, for when we glance at the fading portrait of some forgotten ancestor, graceful in her Colonial gown with its billows and billows of creamy white lace, we feel instinctively that she is well-dressed. And yet, we cannot call her fas.h.i.+onable. It cannot be elaborate attire, for we know that the stylish young miss in her severely tailored suit and sailor hat is certainly well-dressed. It cannot be distinctiveness--or individuality--for many a delightfully well-dressed young woman buys all her frocks and suits in the shops.

No, it is neither of these--and yet, it is all of them. The well-dressed woman has the faculty of charming you--and yet you yourself know not why. You know that she is well-dressed, but when she is gone you cannot remember just what it was that she wore. You have only a faint recollection of a perfect harmony of line and color.

She is fas.h.i.+onable, yes; and elaborate, too, if the occasion warrants it. She is distinctive, but not obviously so. But if she is truly well-dressed, her clothes are of the best materials and the workmans.h.i.+p is faultless. Style, color and line are all incidental to these two dominating principles of dress--material and workmans.h.i.+p.

The striking characteristic of the woman who is well-dressed is her poise, her grace and ease of manner, on all occasions. She is never self-conscious, never uncomfortable. She never is the center of attraction because she is never conspicuous. She is simply yet smartly dressed, graceful yet dignified, attractive yet inconspicuous. Above all, she is _always_ well-dressed--not only on festive occasions.

Every woman has within her the possibilities of being charming--if not beautiful. It requires only the knowledge of correct dress, of harmony and beauty in costume. There is, of course, the woman who insists that she does not care at all about clothes, that she does not care how she is dressed. But she is the exception, and we are interested in the rule.

Woman does herself an injustice by being dowdy, careless or commonplace in dress. She puts herself at an unfair disadvantage. Charm and beauty are the heritage of woman, and the world expects it of her.

NOT A SLAVE TO FAs.h.i.+ON

The woman who is ruled by fas.h.i.+on may not consider herself a well-dressed woman. If her sense of beauty is developed, if she knows the value of art and harmony, she will not be the slave of a stupid mode. She will not wors.h.i.+p at the pedestal of fas.h.i.+on, trembling as each new decree is announced lest she be not among the very first to observe it. Style does not dominate her personality; rather, her personality dominates style.

And after all, is it not absurd to adhere slavishly to that which is in vogue, without attempting to adapt those modes to one's own individuality? There is, for instance, the woman who discards an otherwise attractive and fas.h.i.+onable gown merely because the sleeves are slightly puffed instead of severely tight-fitting as the whim of Fas.h.i.+on demands. She does not stop to consider that puffed sleeves are infinitely more becoming to her. They are not the "latest"--and that fact alone is enough to cause her to discard the gown.

An excellent thought for the girl or woman who wishes to be well-dressed, to remember, is: always dress as though you were going to the photographer to have your picture taken--a picture that you are going to leave to your children to remember you by. If you keep this in mind, you will never wear commonplace clothes nor clothes that are extreme in style, but you will dress with simplicity and taste, being sure to add here and there a touch of your very own personality--perhaps a corsage of violets to show your love of flowers, or a rare old cameo brooch to show your reverence for the things grown old.

THE WELL-DRESSED MAN

Few men realize the tremendous importance of clothes both in the social and business worlds. The effects of dress are far-reaching--and they are certainly no less so among men than women.

There is the story of the man who gained admittance to the Athenaeum Library in Boston, although he was not a member. After spending a very pleasant morning reading, he prepared to leave. It was then that he was attracted to a rather dowdy individual who was remonstrating indignantly with an official at the door. "I am a member, I tell you!" he exclaimed.

"Well, you certainly don't look it," the other retorted.

The man who had spent a morning in the library hastened away. He had not known that use of the reading rooms was restricted to members. But no one had questioned him, as he _looked_ the part of a member. Yet, the man who really did belong, had to submit to the indignity of questioning and of submitting proof, because his appearance--his clothes--did not do justice to his position.

We know that first impressions are the most important, especially in business. The man whose clothes are gaudy, ill-fitting or extreme, will find that he is not making as rapid a stride forward as his abilities warrant. Incorrect dress is a serious handicap. In the social world, it is not only a handicap, but a barrier. The oft-repeated Dutch proverb may be a bit exaggerated, but it certainly has a suggestion of truth--"Clothes Make the Man."

And so we say to the young and the old man alike, dress well. Dress, not as a fas.h.i.+on-plate, but with a regard for appropriate style--and with an especially keen regard for fine materials and excellent workmans.h.i.+p. Do not be content with an ordinary suit, but be sure that each one you wear imparts that poise and dignity which is so essential to the true gentleman. Your wardrobe need not be filled with suits for every day and every occasion; but a few carefully selected garments, well-tailored and smartly styled will earn for you the enviable distinction of "a well-dressed man."

One might remember, to quote once again from the proverbs of the Dutch, that "A smart coat is a good letter of introduction."

THE CHARM OF OLD AGE

Youth may not claim sole possession of charm. Old age has a charm all its own--a silver charm that makes one think of mellowed roses, and fading sunsets.

A delightful gray-and-lilac grandmother, reposing quietly in the depths of a great armchair, perhaps dreaming of a golden youth--this is a picture that artists have long loved to paint. There is something strangely irresistible in old age, especially when old age is beautiful. And to make it beautiful requires only a calm a.s.surance and kind heart combined with clothes that are in good taste and in harmony with one's years and personality.

Of course, one does not expect one's grandmother to wear the same kind of gay creations that young Miss Seventeen delights in; nor would one expect one's grandfather to flaunt the same style of suit one's son wears at college. The sound of rustling silk and sweeping petticoats is one of the charms of the elderly lady--but an abbreviated skirt would certainly make her appear ridiculous. Similarly, the elderly gentleman finds dignity and distinction in a black frock coat, but one is inclined to smile when he appears in the jaunty black-and-white checked Norfolk suit that would better become his son.

Yes, age has a charm that is well worth striving for. There is something decidedly imposing and impressive about a handsome old man immaculately dressed; and there are no words beautiful enough to describe the enchantment of the silver-haired old lady in delicate colors and fabrics, and flowing styles reminiscent of the days of powdered wigs.

Old age has its compensations; youth can never have its charming repose and calm.

THE ELDERLY WOMAN

In these days, when daughter and grandmother enjoy the same entertainments, and attend the same affairs, the clothes of the elderly woman are just as important as those of the younger. We shall describe here several kinds of costumes that invariably add charm to old age, so that grandmother may appear to advantage beside the youthful bloom of the young girl.

There is, for instance, the soft, wide lace fichu so becoming to the elderly woman--but that the young miss cannot very well wear. Combined with a dress of brocaded satin, with a full skirt that takes one back to the days of the Quakers, the lace fichu is most attractive. Then there is always the shadowy charm of black velvet and black lace. For the more formal occasions when the elderly woman wishes to be particularly well-dressed, yet not conspicuous, a dress of black velvet, with wide frills of black Chantilly lace, makes a most appropriate costume. The lace may be used to veil the skirt and as sleeves.

The elderly woman may choose any dark color that becomes her--gray, dark blue and black are perhaps the three colors most favored. There are several light colors that are appropriate, chief among them, gray and lavendar. Materials worn by the woman-who-is-older are taffeta, velvet, _crepe de chine_ and satin. She should avoid such materials as organdie, georgette and tulle--they are meant for youth.

IMITATION AND OVER-DRESSING

Two of the most common faults of elderly women are imitation and over-dressing. Both rob old age of its charm, and the wise woman will conscientiously avoid them.

By imitation, we mean the following of fas.h.i.+ons and styles meant for the young person. We see women celebrating their fiftieth wedding anniversaries wearing "fas.h.i.+onable" dresses that are in absolute discord with their years and personality. Short skirts and straight-line silhouettes may be perfectly all right, but they certainly do not give to old age the imposing dignity that is its main charm.

One instinctively respects and admires the white-haired woman whose skirts are of a length commensurate with her age and dignity, and who carries herself with calm poise. More than that, one _appreciates_ her.

But the woman who is growing old and insists upon keeping herself young by wearing inappropriate and inharmonious clothes, is merely making a farce of herself. There can be nothing more ridiculous than a woman past fifty in gown and wrap obviously created for the young person of seventeen. Instead of improving her appearance, the elderly woman deprives herself of the charm that should rightfully be hers.

As for over-dressing, it is so utterly bad form and bad taste that it requires only pa.s.sing notice. Just as simplicity enhances the beauty of youth, so does simplicity enhance the charm of old-age. Ostentation of any kind, jewels, bright colors, gaudy styles--all these make old age awkward, unpresentable and unrefined.

THE OLDER GENTLEMAN

One can be a good many years past fifty and still enjoy the theater, the opera. And one can easily retain the presentable dignity of earlier days by wearing clothes that are just as appropriate as those of those earlier days.

For afternoon wear the elderly man will find the black frock coat with gray trousers most effective. He should wear white linen, wing collar and small black tie. This costume is also appropriate for morning wear.

In the evening the gentleman always wears full dress, irrespective of age.

In the warmer climates, gentlemen of more mature years find keen pleasure in the early morning and afternoon costume consisting of black and white patterned homespun jacket, slacks and waistcoat of white flannel, white linen and foulard tie. Black and white sport shoes and a light panama hat complete the costume admirably.

A TRIP TO THE SOUTH

Because it is the trip about which people are most in doubt when it comes to deciding what to take along we give here below a few suggestions about the wardrobe for a person about to start South.

To visit the balmy suns.h.i.+ne of the South, is to require a wardrobe that will harmonize with the lazy mood of the skies of Havana or Miami. Even though the snows may have tied up traffic in one's own home town, clothes for the Southland trip must be delicate, "summery" and flimsy.

One includes a bathing suit, too, although the lake back home is frozen over.

The wardrobe one takes to the South depends largely upon the duration of the visit and the extent of one's purse. The one described here is for the average requirements of both.

For the mornings there must be several crisp, demure little frocks that are easy to launder. Bright colors match bright skies, and wide sashes are most becoming. For afternoon wear, frocks of taffeta, silk and organdie are suggested--colorful little frocks made with a regard for easy packing and attractiveness. Canton crepe is a lovely material, especially when it is of pale apricot or Nile green--and it does not crush as easily as taffeta or organdie. A delightful frock for Southern wear is hand-sewn voile in a soft old rose shade. With it may be worn a large-brimmed straw hat of old rose.

Bright sweaters, sport skirts, sport coats, blouses, oxfords--all these are of course indispensable to the wardrobe for the southern visit. The number of sweaters and blouses taken depends upon the length of the visit. One should include a bathing suit, a beach coat and a brightly colored parasol. And the smart frock for evening strolls must not be forgotten.

At least one elaborate evening gown, and two or three semi-evening gowns will be necessary even if the visit to the South is a short one. And we would heartily recommend a fluffy little evening wrap to go with the gown. Then, of course, there are the little strapped slippers and the low-cut sports shoes to be considered.