The Female Wits Part 17

L. _Whiff._ That's one way; but pray lets hear the Ladies.

_Mar._ You must know, my Lord, at first I design'd this for Tragedy; and they were both taken; She was Poyson'd, and dy'd, like an Innocent Lamb, as she was indeed: I was studying a Death for him; once I thought Boys shou'd shoot him to Death with Pot-Guns: for your Lords.h.i.+p may be pleas'd to understand, _Amorous_ had been a Soldier, tho' now he was a Steward of the Family; and that wou'd have been Disgrace enough, you know: But at length I resolv'd to ram him into a great Gun, and scatter him o're the st.u.r.dy Plain: This, I say, was my first resolve. But I consider'd, 'twould break the Lady's Heart; so there is nothing in their Parts Tragical but as your Lords.h.i.+p shall see miraculously I turn'd it into an Opera.

L. _Whif._ Your Ladys.h.i.+p's Wit is Almighty, and produces nothing but Wonders.

Mr. _Prais._ The Devil take his Lords.h.i.+p, he is always before hand with me, and goes so confounded high, there's no coming after him.

_Mar._ Your Lords.h.i.+p shall see what, I think, their Opera's have not yet had.

_SCENE The Leads of a Castle._

_The Sun seen a little beyond: A Chariot stands upon the Leads._

_Enter_ Isabella, _follow'd by_ Amorous.

_Isab._ Now Death's in view, methinks I fear the Monster. Is there no G.o.d that Pities Innocence? Oh! thou All-seeing Sun, contract thy Glorious Beam's, hide me, in Darkness hide me!

Mr. _Awd._ I am sorry to find your Heroine Shrink.

_Mar._ Oh! 'tis more natural for a woman than bold; as an Imprison'd Cat, to fly Death i th Face, as 'twere. Humph, was it you I took pains to convince? Pray no more Interruption of this Scene.

_Amor._ Ten Ma.s.sy Doors, all barr'd with wondrous strength impede their Pa.s.sage: Rest then, thou Milk-white hunted Hind, forget the near Approach of fear, and hear the Story of my Love.

Mr. _Awd._ Hey boy, little _Amorous_! He'll loose no opportunity.

Mr. _Prais._ He is not like to have many; he was a fool, if he did not improve 'em.

_Isab._ We soon shall mount yon Blisful Seats! Let us be rob'd with Innocence, least we want admittance there.

_Amor._ All Dreams! meer Dreams! bred from the Fumes of Crabbed Education, and must we for this lose true Substantial Pleasure? By Heav'n, 'twould be a n.o.ble Justice to defeat their Malice: they hunt us for imaginary Crimes; and we must dye like Fools for doing nothing.

Mr. _Prais._ Well urg'd, _Amorous_.

L. _Whiff._ Bold, I vow.

_Mar._ A Lover shou'd be so, my Lord.

_Amor._ But give me up the Heav'n my ravenous Love requires: Let me fill my Sences with thy Sweetness; then let 'em pour upon me, I cou'd laugh at all their idle Tortures, every pleas'd Limb shou'd dance upon the Wheel.

_Mar._ Dance upon the Wheel! that's a new thought, I am sure, my Lord.

L. _Whiff._ Your Tract is all new, and must be uncommon, because others can never find it.

_Prais._ A Pox on him! he has out-done me agen.

_Mar._ I am your Lords.h.i.+p's very humble Servant: My Lord, How _Amorous_ gazes on her!

L. _Whiff._ Piercing Eyes, I confess.

_Prais._ An irresistible Lere----I got in a word.

_Isab._ Take off your Eyes; mine shou'd be fix'd above; but Love draws 'em downwards, and almost pulls my Heart along.

_Amo._ Give me your Heart! your Arms! Oh! give me all! see at your Feet the wretched _Amorous_ falls! Be not more cruel than our Foes. Behold me on the Torture! _Fastin_ cannot Punish me with half the Racks denying Beauty lays on longing Love.

_Isab._ I recover strength: rise, and begone; Alas, thou can'st not go; then at awful distance, cold as Ice, not dare to let thy hot Breath agen offend my chaste Ears! If thou hast, a Dagger rams thy Pa.s.sion down thy Throat.

_Mar._ Won't this be a Surprize, my Lord, to see her have such an Icy Fit?

L. _Whiff._ When I thought she was just going to melt.

_Amor._ See, you are obey'd; s.h.i.+vering your er'e-while raging Lover stands; your Words and Looks, like Frost on Flowers, have nipt my Hopes and fierce Desires!

Mr. _Prais._ Alas, poor _Amorous_! (_A Noise without._

_Mar._ Do you hear, my Lord? do's not your Heart ake for the poor Lovers?

L. _Whif._ I am ready to swoon, Madam.

Mr. _Prais._ Wou'd I had some Cordial-water.

Mr. _Awd._ Art thou _Marsilia_? wilt thou confess it? so weak to believe these c.o.xcombs?

_Mar._ I always choose to believe what pleases me best. If a School-Boy had been told so often of a Fault, as you have been, of Interruption, he had certainly left it. Make a Noise agen without.

_Isab._ Alas my fears return; what shall I do? I dare not dye.

_Amor._ Oh Let not Monstrous Fear deform the Beauties of thy Soul, but brave thy Fate.

_Mar._ Louder; but brave thy Fate; strain your Voice: I tell you, Mr.

_Pinkethman_, this speaking Loud gets the Clap.

_Amo._ Pox of this Heroick; I shall tear my Lungs. (_Aside._ But brave thy Fate.

_Mar._ Aye, that goes to ones very Heart.

_Awd._ And rends ones Head.

_Isab._ I cannot, I dare not; Oh, they come! where shall I hide me?

(_Gets into the Chariot._

_Amo._ For Heav'n's sake, Madam, come from hence: This will expose us to all their scorn. (_goes in after._

_Mar._ Now, now, up with it. Here, my Lord, here's the wonder; this very Chariot _Whimsical_ had been making fifty Years, contriv'd beyond all humane Art, for the Sun to draw up to the Moon; at this very Critical minute the Matter's affected. Is not your Lords.h.i.+p surpriz'd_?_

L. _Whif._ I know not where I am!