The Spell Part 44
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"Until that complication is relieved there is no hope."
"Do you feel strong enough for that?" asked Cerini, anxiously.
"It requires more than strength, padre," Armstrong replied, seriously; "it requires faith in myself, which at present is sadly lacking."
The old man rose and stood for a moment beside Armstrong's half-reclining figure. Bending down, he took his face in his hands and looked full into his eyes.
"Let me give you that faith," he said, affectionately. "You have already learned by sad experience that you are not the master of Fate.
Let me tell you that by the same token you are not the victim of Fate.
Nature, unerring in her wisdom, is now giving you the privilege of being co-partner with her in the final solving of your great personal problem.
Accept the offered opportunity, my son, and show yourself finally worthy of it."
x.x.x
Helen had not overlooked the contessa's remark to Cerini, even though she gave no evidence at the time of having heard it. Her conversation with Jack had given her thoughts much food to feed upon. His words were so welcome, after the long breach, his manner so sincere, that she had been nearer to the yielding-point than he imagined. She had wondered if, after all, her att.i.tude was justified, in view of his expressed desire to return to the same relations which had previously given them both such happiness. Jack's statement that her insistence upon the present conditions would do more to wreck their happiness than anything which he had done, made its impression upon her. Nothing but the previous intensity of her conviction that she must yield her place to Inez had held her to the self-appointed duty which she found so difficult to perform.
When the contessa repeated to Cerini what appeared to be an expression of her husband's impatience to return to his work Helen felt all hesitation vanish. Jack sympathized with her suffering, and would do all which lay in his power to make amends. She knew that he would give up all idea of future work, no matter at what sacrifice to himself, rather than add another straw to the burden which he now saw was nearly bearing her down. Yet the affection which she felt for him refused to be strangled. His very insistence, even though she was convinced that it was prompted by his sense of duty, fanned the embers into flame at a time when she was certain that at last their fire had become extinct. It was further evidence of her weakness, she told herself, and she would make superhuman efforts to adhere to the duty which lay plainly enough before her.
As she was leaving, the contessa placed her arm about Helen's waist and whispered to her:
"Don't think me meddlesome, my dear, but you will make a great mistake not to stick close beside that big, splendid husband of yours. They all do it, and I imagine he has been almost circ.u.mspect compared with most of them. Send the girl away and see if you can't make him forget his affinity. He is worth the effort, my dear--believe me, he is worth the effort."
Helen was so taken by surprise by the contessa's words that she stood speechless, looking at her with dull, lifeless eyes as she stepped into the tonneau and waved a smiling farewell as the motor-car rolled out of the court-yard. So the contessa was aware of the situation, and was also convinced of Jack's attachment for Inez! This was too horrible--she could not endure it! Matters must be brought to a head soon or she would die of mortification! She could not return to the veranda where she had left Cerini and Jack together, but went up-stairs to her room, where she locked the door and threw herself upon the bed in a paroxysm of tears.
Armstrong, on the contrary, had gained strength from Cerini's sympathy.
He would accept the offered opportunity and see if at last he could not prove himself worthy of such glorious co-partners.h.i.+p. Unlike his previous efforts, if he succeeded it would tend to restore Helen's happiness as well, and this gave him an added incentive.
It was the afternoon of the next day before he was able to make his opportunity. Inez had taken a book and secreted herself in Helen's "snuggery" in the garden, but Armstrong's watchful eyes followed her.
Waiting until she had time to become well settled, he strolled around the garden, finally appearing at the entrance to prevent her escape. To his surprise she made no such effort, and appeared more at ease than at any time since the accident.
"Have you come to join me?" she asked, with much of her former bearing.
"If I may," he replied, advancing to the seat and taking the place she made for him beside her.
"How famously you are getting on!" she said, laying down the volume; "you are more like yourself than I have seen you since the awful accident."
"If I may say so," Armstrong replied, watching her closely, "I was just thinking the same of you."
Inez flushed. "You are right," she answered, frankly, after a moment's pause.
Armstrong was distinctly relieved by her unexpected att.i.tude. As he looked back he realized that there had been a change in her bearing toward him, particularly during the past week; but until now he had not appreciated how rapidly her unnatural manner had been returning to what it was during the early days of their acquaintance. The apparent effort to avoid him had disappeared, although he knew of no more reason for this than he had originally seen cause for its existence. Whatever the reason, the change had undoubtedly taken place, and it made matters easier for him.
"We have pa.s.sed through much together, Miss Thayer," he began. "I wonder if we realize how much."
"It has certainly been an unusual experience," she admitted. "I expressed this to you at the library--do you remember? As I said then, it could hardly occur again."
"I appreciate that now," Armstrong replied, in a low voice; "at that time I do not think I did."
"There was much which you could not appreciate then," continued Inez; "and as I look back upon it there is much which I cannot explain to myself. In fact, there is a great deal that I blame myself for."
"The blame belongs to me, Miss Thayer," Armstrong a.s.serted, firmly.
"For being away from Helen so much?"
"Yes; and for many other acts of selfishness and neglect. I am to blame for all that you feel against yourself."
"Against myself?" Inez repeated.
Armstrong paused long before he continued. "You have pa.s.sed through this spell with me," he said, at length. "You, better than any one else, know its power, and can understand the cause of my att.i.tude toward you and Helen, which was as inexplicable as it was unpardonable. And because you understand this I believe that I shall find you the more ready to forgive."
"There is nothing for which you stand in need of my forgiveness," Inez said, in a low tone. "On the contrary, there is much for which I have to thank you. It was a new world to which you introduced me--one which I should not otherwise have known; and having known it, nothing can ever take it from me."
"If matters had only stopped there," Armstrong continued, "I should have accomplished just what I had hoped to do. The fascination of the work so held me, and my desire to further the principles which seemed to me to represent all which made life worth the living resulted in blinding me to the possibility that you, perhaps, were not affected to a similar degree. Your a.s.sistance was so valuable, your companions.h.i.+p so congenial that I never once realized that I was running any risk of not performing my full duty toward you as well as toward Helen."
Inez could not fail to comprehend the import of his words, and a feeling of thankfulness pa.s.sed over her that this conversation had not come earlier. The days which had pa.s.sed since she confided to Helen the secret which she had so long carried alone had, in their way, been as full of chaotic conditions as had Armstrong's; yet it was but recently that she had come to realize the full importance of what had really happened. The days at the library, as she looked back upon them, seemed as a dream. She could close her eyes and bring back the intoxication of those moments alone with Armstrong in which she had silently revelled, while he had applied himself to the task before him unconscious of what was taking place. She could not deny herself the guilty pleasure of recalling them, yet little by little these thoughts had become disa.s.sociated from the man with whom she now came in almost hourly contact. With this disa.s.sociation came a welcome relief. The dread which she had felt of seeing him and hearing his voice disappeared as suddenly as it had come. She wondered at it, but she accepted it eagerly without waiting for an explanation.
With her return to more normal conditions her solicitude for Helen increased. She was conscious of her friend's unhappiness, yet she, perhaps, of all the household, was least aware of the extent of the breach between her and Armstrong. Helen, naturally perhaps, had confined her conversation upon this subject to Uncle Peabody and her husband, so Inez had no thought other than that all would straighten itself out now that Jack had become himself again. She had believed that Helen alone shared her secret with her, so it was with surprise and mortification that she became aware that Armstrong himself knew of what had taken place. This was even more of an ordeal to face than when she made her confession to Helen, yet it was one which ought to be met with absolute frankness.
"I understand what you mean," she replied, the color still showing in her face, "and I am glad that this opportunity has come for me to speak freely, even at the risk of losing your esteem. It is quite true that I, too, found myself beneath a spell--but besides this one which influenced you there was also another and a different one. I see no reason why I should be ashamed to say that this other spell was unconsciously exerted by a great scholar, a n.o.ble friend, a loyal husband. The effect of it was for a time overpowering, but now I can acknowledge it without injuring any one and express my grat.i.tude for an influence which must always act for my best good."
"Miss Thayer!" Armstrong cried, overwhelmed by the revulsion which the girl's words brought to him. "I beg of you not to make virtues out of my errors; I cannot accept a tribute such as that, knowing myself to be unworthy of it. Can you not see that I should have guarded you from that spell, both for your sake and for Helen's?"
Inez smiled in real happiness that the break had at last been made. "You have given me far more than you have taken away, dear friend," she replied, gratefully; "now that the experience is past I appreciate it more than ever. But promise me that you will not give up this work because of what we all have been through."
Armstrong shook his head. "I shall not take such chances again," he said.
"It could never repeat itself," Inez urged. "Because one has been wounded by the thorn he failed to see is no reason why he should never pluck another rose."
"But suppose that in plucking the rose something fell out from next the heart which was inexpressibly dear to him and was lost forever?"
Inez looked up quickly. "What do you mean?" she asked.
"Do you not know that Helen insists upon a separation?"
"A separation!" Inez repeated, rising to her feet; "why, she wors.h.i.+ps you! Surely there is some mistake."
"No; she is convinced that our marriage was all wrong, and that she stands between me and the continuance of this work, which she argues is essential for my development and happiness. It is ridiculous, of course, but I cannot move her."
"She is right about the work," the girl said, decidedly; "but there is no one in the world better fitted to enter into it with you than she, if she but knew it. As I said, you will never take it up in the same way again, but having learned what it means you can never eliminate it from your life; and this should draw you and Helen even closer together."
"My one remaining labor is to convince her of this," Armstrong replied, feelingly.
"And I will help you do it."
Armstrong looked at her steadily for a moment. "There is another point upon which she insists, of which I have not told you," he said.
The Spell Part 44
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The Spell Part 44 summary
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