A London Life and Other Tales Part 27
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The old lady looked up at me from her book. 'I didn't know you called that all right.'
'Well, it's better than something else.'
'Something else?'
'Something I was a little afraid of.' Mrs. Nettlepoint continued to look at me; she asked me what that was. 'I'll tell you when we are ash.o.r.e,' I said.
The next day I went to see her, at the usual hour of my morning visit, and found her in considerable agitation. 'The scenes have begun,' she said; 'you know I told you I shouldn't get through without them! You made me nervous last night--I haven't the least idea what you meant; but you made me nervous. She came in to see me an hour ago, and I had the courage to say to her, "I don't know why I shouldn't tell you frankly that I have been scolding my son about you." Of course she asked me what I meant by that, and I said--"It seems to me he drags you about the s.h.i.+p too much, for a girl in your position. He has the air of not remembering that you belong to some one else. There is a kind of want of taste and even of want of respect in it." That produced an explosion; she became very violent.'
'Do you mean angry?'
'Not exactly angry, but very hot and excited--at my presuming to think her relations with my son were not the simplest in the world. I might scold him as much as I liked--that was between ourselves; but she didn't see why I should tell her that I had done so. Did I think she allowed him to treat her with disrespect? That idea was not very complimentary to her! He had treated her better and been kinder to her than most other people--there were very few on the s.h.i.+p that hadn't been insulting. She should be glad enough when she got off it, to her own people, to some one whom no one would have a right to say anything about. What was there in her position that was not perfectly natural? What was the idea of making a fuss about her position? Did I mean that she took it too easily--that she didn't think as much as she ought about Mr.
Porterfield? Didn't I believe she was attached to him--didn't I believe she was just counting the hours until she saw him? That would be the happiest moment of her life. It showed how little I knew her, if I thought anything else.'
'All that must have been rather fine--I should have liked to hear it,' I said. 'And what did you reply?'
'Oh, I grovelled; I told her that I accused her (as regards my son) of nothing worse than an excess of good nature. She helped him to pa.s.s his time--he ought to be immensely obliged. Also that it would be a very happy moment for me too when I should hand her over to Mr. Porterfield.'
'And will you come up to-day?'
'No indeed--she'll do very well now.'
I gave a sigh of relief. 'All's well that ends well!'
Jasper, that day, spent a great deal of time with his mother. She had told me that she really had had no proper opportunity to talk over with him their movements after disembarking. Everything changes a little, the last two or three days of a voyage; the spell is broken and new combinations take place. Grace Mavis was neither on deck nor at dinner, and I drew Mrs. Peck's attention to the extreme propriety with which she now conducted herself. She had spent the day in meditation and she judged it best to continue to meditate.
'Ah, she's afraid,' said my implacable neighbour.
'Afraid of what?'
'Well, that we'll tell tales when we get there.'
'Whom do you mean by "we"?'
'Well, there are plenty, on a s.h.i.+p like this.'
'Well then, we won't.'
'Maybe we won't have the chance,' said the dreadful little woman.
'Oh, at that moment a universal geniality reigns.'
'Well, she's afraid, all the same.'
'So much the better.'
'Yes, so much the better.'
All the next day, too, the girl remained invisible and Mrs. Nettlepoint told me that she had not been in to see her. She had inquired by the stewardess if she would receive her in her own cabin, and Grace Mavis had replied that it was littered up with things and unfit for visitors: she was packing a trunk over. Jasper made up for his devotion to his mother the day before by now spending a great deal of his time in the smoking-room. I wanted to say to him 'This is much better,' but I thought it wiser to hold my tongue. Indeed I had begun to feel the emotion of prospective arrival (I was delighted to be almost back in my dear old Europe again) and had less to spare for other matters. It will doubtless appear to the critical reader that I had already devoted far too much to the little episode of which my story gives an account, but to this I can only reply that the event justified me. We sighted land, the dim yet rich coast of Ireland, about sunset and I leaned on the edge of the s.h.i.+p and looked at it. 'It doesn't look like much, does it?' I heard a voice say, beside me; and, turning, I found Grace Mavis was there. Almost for the first time she had her veil up, and I thought her very pale.
'It will be more to-morrow,' I said.
'Oh yes, a great deal more.'
'The first sight of land, at sea, changes everything,' I went on. 'I always think it's like waking up from a dream. It's a return to reality.'
For a moment she made no response to this; then she said, 'It doesn't look very real yet.'
'No, and meanwhile, this lovely evening, the dream is still present.'
She looked up at the sky, which had a brightness, though the light of the sun had left it and that of the stars had not come out. 'It _is_ a lovely evening.'
'Oh yes, with this we shall do.'
She stood there a while longer, while the growing dusk effaced the line of the land more rapidly than our progress made it distinct. She said nothing more, she only looked in front of her; but her very quietness made me want to say something suggestive of sympathy and service. I was unable to think what to say--some things seemed too wide of the mark and others too importunate. At last, unexpectedly, she appeared to give me my chance. Irrelevantly, abruptly she broke out:
'Didn't you tell me that you knew Mr. Porterfield?'
'Dear me, yes--I used to see him. I have often wanted to talk to you about him.'
She turned her face upon me and in the deepened evening I fancied she looked whiter. 'What good would that do?'
'Why, it would be a pleasure,' I replied, rather foolishly.
'Do you mean for you?'
'Well, yes--call it that,' I said, smiling.
'Did you know him so well?'
My smile became a laugh and I said--'You are not easy to make speeches to.'
'I hate speeches!' The words came from her lips with a violence that surprised me; they were loud and hard. But before I had time to wonder at it she went on--'Shall you know him when you see him?'
'Perfectly, I think.' Her manner was so strange that one had to notice it in some way, and it appeared to me the best way was to notice it jocularly; so I added, 'Shan't you?'
'Oh, perhaps you'll point him out!' And she walked quickly away. As I looked after her I had a singular, a perverse and rather an embarra.s.sed sense of having, during the previous days, and especially in speaking to Jasper Nettlepoint, interfered with her situation to her loss. I had a sort of pang in seeing her move about alone; I felt somehow responsible for it and asked myself why I could not have kept my hands off. I had seen Jasper in the smoking-room more than once that day, as I pa.s.sed it, and half an hour before this I had observed, through the open door, that he was there. He had been with her so much that without him she had a bereaved, forsaken air. It was better, no doubt, but superficially it made her rather pitiable. Mrs. Peck would have told me that their separation was gammon; they didn't show together on deck and in the saloon, but they made it up elsewhere. The secret places on s.h.i.+pboard are not numerous; Mrs. Peck's 'elsewhere' would have been vague and I know not what license her imagination took. It was distinct that Jasper had fallen off, but of course what had pa.s.sed between them on this subject was not so and could never be. Later, through his mother, I had _his_ version of that, but I may remark that I didn't believe it. Poor Mrs. Nettlepoint did, of course. I was almost capable, after the girl had left me, of going to my young man and saying, 'After all, do return to her a little, just till we get in! It won't make any difference after we land.' And I don't think it was the fear he would tell me I was an idiot that prevented me. At any rate the next time I pa.s.sed the door of the smoking-room I saw that he had left it. I paid my usual visit to Mrs. Nettlepoint that night, but I troubled her no further about Miss Mavis. She had made up her mind that everything was smooth and settled now, and it seemed to me that I had worried her and that she had worried herself enough. I left her to enjoy the foretaste of arrival, which had taken possession of her mind. Before turning in I went above and found more pa.s.sengers on deck than I had ever seen so late. Jasper was walking about among them alone, but I forebore to join him. The coast of Ireland had disappeared, but the night and the sea were perfect. On the way to my cabin, when I came down, I met the stewardess in one of the pa.s.sages and the idea entered my head to say to her--'Do you happen to know where Miss Mavis is?'
'Why, she's in her room, sir, at this hour.'
'Do you suppose I could speak to her?' It had come into my mind to ask her why she had inquired of me whether I should recognise Mr.
Porterfield.
'No, sir,' said the stewardess; 'she has gone to bed.'
'That's all right.' And I followed the young lady's excellent example.
The next morning, while I was dressing, the steward of my side of the s.h.i.+p came to me as usual to see what I wanted. But the first thing he said to me was--'Rather a bad job, sir--a pa.s.senger missing.'
A London Life and Other Tales Part 27
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A London Life and Other Tales Part 27 summary
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