The Sententia: Second Thoughts Part 2

My early nervousness began to change into a more familiar, and enjoyable, feeling. Though I'd been to my aunt's unveilings many times before, I'd never once failed to be proud of or excited for her. As we approached the Auditorium, I let the antic.i.p.ation settle in on me like an old, welcome friend.

People were already gathering outside, where there was a small group of performers from the student orchestra to entertain them and several waiters mingled amongst the crowd with c.o.c.ktails and light hors d'oeuvres. The front doors were locked and darkened, adding to the atmosphere of drama and suspense. I smiled to myself as we slipped around the side of the building to the rear door. My aunt was a real pro at this kind of thing. She'd promised me a private showing before the doors opened and she became the center of attention.

"Auntie?" I called as I pushed open the back door. It creaked as it swung and opened into a dim, deserted hallway. Honestly, it would have been a little creepy if not for the five huge trays of full champagne flutes sparkling in a row against the wall. Score. I looked sideways at Amy, who winked at me, and we swiped a gla.s.s each before making our way through the stage doors at the end of the hall.

We stepped through from backstage into the auditorium itself but it, too, appeared empty, the lights glowing just enough for us to see our way down the aisles. We were headed toward the lobby proper to search for my aunt when her voice called to me from seemingly everywhere at once.

"Elaine Rachel Young! Don't go any further!" I jumped at the booming sound and spun in a circle, searching for her. "Up here, silly!" Aunt Tessa's voice echoed again, followed by a ghostly laugh. Amy laughed too and pointed up. There, at the back of the balcony, was my beautiful, bohemian aunt waving at us from behind the previously darkened windows of the lighting control room.

I warmed just at the sight of her. Tonight her small, curvy frame was showcased by the swirling print of her skirt, a simple black strapless top, and layers of entirely different but somehow perfectly coordinated necklaces that glimmered in the dim lighting. Her dark, wavy hair fell over one shoulder as she swept down the stairs to where we were standing.

"You look so beautiful!" I gushed, taking a moment to admire her before hugging her tightly. "And I can't wait to finally see what you've done for the Academy."

"Thank you, sweetie," she said before releasing me to hug my roommate too. "Good to see you Amy. Let me show you before the rest of the guests get tired of waiting." She eyed our gla.s.ses of champagne, warning, "And you finish those before the reception starts," before leading us out of the auditorium.

We followed her through the doors and into the dark hallway that led to the lobby. In fact, when the door swung shut behind us, it wasn't just dark but pitch black. I nearly stumbled over my aunt before she grabbed my hand and said, "Just walk slowly. I promise it will be worth it." Amy gripped the back of my s.h.i.+rt as we inched through the darkness.

When we reached what seemed like the end of the hall-even the lobby was pitch black-Aunt Tessa said, "Okay, now!" into a small walkie-talkie I hadn't even noticed she was holding. The lights blazed to life overhead.

When my eyes finally adjusted, I was no less dazzled. What had previously been a boring architectural ceiling of acoustic sound panels had been transformed into a myriad flock of hanging origami birds in an array of materials-mixed metals, plaster, wood, lacquered paper. There were at least fifty of them, all different shapes and sizes, hanging at varied lengths and in different angles of flight or rest. They weren't just the basic, familiar crane shapes either; there were swans and peac.o.c.ks, swallows and herons, eagles and owls, along with a number of other birds I couldn't name on sight.

The birds would have been impressive on their own, but this was an installation, not just a sculpture exhibit. Before long, the tiny, artfully placed spotlights began to rotate and move, casting shadows across the white ceiling, and giving the entire room the impression of birds in flight. It was nothing short of magical.

I gasped in awe and gripped my aunt's hand, which I'd never relinquished, even tighter. Next to me, Amy breathed out an impressive curse.

"Oh Auntie." I pulled her into another crus.h.i.+ng hug. "It's...amazing. I don't even know what else to say."

"It really is, Ms. Espinosa," Amy said. There was wonder in her voice, and I saw her wipe at her eyes as we continued to stare at the ever-changing ceiling.

"Thank you, girls," Aunt Tessa said. "I'm so glad you like it. I hope everyone else does too. And now, it's about time to show it to them."

THE BIG UNVEILING was even more impressive than our private showing. I wasn't sure how it would work, trying to usher everyone into a dark room to preserve the mystery, but Aunt Tessa still had more tricks in store for us. She left me with a wink and a wave to go greet the guests as they entered. Amy went out to the grounds to find her parents and Caleb while I waited patiently, in the dark, by the side wall.

I wished Carter, Melinda, and Jeff were able to be here for this part, but they wouldn't arrive until later, after they'd closed the bookstore for the night. As much as they wanted to come, the unveiling was also the beginning of Homecoming, one of the busiest weekends of the year at the store. This meant actual paying customers-alumni and families-lots of them, not just the current students they generously entertained in the lounge on a daily basis.

As I watched in fascination, people filtered slowly into the Auditorium's lobby, each carrying a faintly luminescent glow-stick, giving off just enough light to guide them but not enough to ruin the surprise. When everyone was a.s.sembled, the room appeared to be full of anxious fireflies, flitting amongst each other, their quiet, curious whispers filling the room with buzz and excitement. The door opened and closed one final time and moments later a spotlight illuminated my lovely aunt. The crowd fell completely silent.

"Good evening, and welcome," she said in her practiced, resonant voice. "I'd like to thank you all again for joining us and especially for being an important part of what has made Northbrook Academy an historic and elite inst.i.tution, one I am proud that my niece attends. It is my great honor to donate this permanent installation to the Academy, and my wish that it will be enjoyed and enhanced for many years to come. Without further delay, I present you with Future Flight. Enjoy!"

Like before, the overhead lights came on in a flash, this time accompanied by a track of ambient music intermixed with subtle bird calls and songs. The crowd gave a polite and appreciative round of applause while they all admired the ceiling's flock. Just at the right moment, as voices began to grow and people started to mingle, the music swelled and the miniature spotlights went into action. The room again plunged into silence, except for a few surprised gasps and exclamations, before it erupted into a nearly thunderous ovation. Aunt Tessa was bombarded by congratulations, while Headmaster Stewart, stationed by her side, smiled broadly and genuinely.

I spotted Amy in the crowd and went to join her, swiping another gla.s.s of champagne on my way. I carried it discreetly at my side and hoped that my aunt-or the headmaster-wouldn't notice. Amy and Caleb were both grinning at me by the time I reached them.

"That was freaking incredible," Caleb said. Amy nodded in agreement before grabbing my champagne and taking a big swallow. "Amy told me it would be great, but wow, yeah. I had no idea. And I wondered why the ceiling in here had been draped in black cloth since the beginning of the semester. So this is really what your aunt does all the time?"

I could feel the proud smile pus.h.i.+ng at the limits of my cheeks before I snuck my own sip of my drink. "Isn't she amazing? It's not always the same exhibit, of course, and sometimes she just does sculptures. It's not always so exciting either. Most of the time, half the attendees have done this kind of thing a million times before too. See those two guys over there?" I pointed to the side of the room where two men stood separate from most of the crowd, chatting and gesturing. "Those are art critics from the city. I remember them from when we lived in Boston a few years ago. I think they were impressed, too, though. Usually they're just straight-faced and a little bored looking."

Caleb eyed the men with curiosity while Amy made a little pout in their direction. "I don't know how they couldn't be impressed," she said. "Unless they're blind or dead, and it doesn't look like they're either. Well, maybe a little dead-ish, but not dead dead."

I giggled. "Well, we can read what they thought in the paper tomorrow. At least one of them will write up their review tonight." The men broke from the side of the room and started toward where my aunt was standing next to a bronze plaque that had also been unveiled. "This is where she tells them all about the piece and her inspiration and all that. They could read it all on that plaque, but it's more interesting to hear my aunt tell it. She'll entertain them for a while now."

And she did. My aunt began a long dialogue with the critics, as well as a crowd of other interested listeners, and I made a loop around the room, stopping to greet Amy's parents and a few other friends, before drifting over to listen to some of her explanation. I wanted to hear it too.

"...symbolizes the diversity of the student body, but also their similarities. They're all from different places and backgrounds, cut from different cloths so to speak, and have been folded and molded in different ways by their families, their experiences, this school. They come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, but they also all have one thing in common: they're about to take flight. Their future is before them, and we can only hope we've prepared them well. I worry daily about setting my own niece free to fly,"-she gestured to where she'd noticed me lingering at the edge of the group-"but have to believe I've done my best to make sure she's ready. Sending her here, to Northbrook, is certainly one of the best a.s.surances I could have."

She paused to smile first over at me, and then at the headmaster and other prominent Academy personalities in the group. I knew she was genuine, but after years of experience, she also knew how to spin her flattery in the perfect moments. "You'll note the many openings throughout the form where additional birds can be placed. I've already discussed a project with the Academy's art department so that student-artists can collaborate on a new bird each year to commemorate the graduating cla.s.s..."

I drifted away at that point to mingle. I thought the last part my aunt mentioned was a wonderful touch, to let the students personalize the installation, and I wondered who would work on the bird for my cla.s.s this year. I was speculating about that with Brooke Barros, one of my only Sententia friends, when I saw him. A small commotion at the door caught our attention, and we both turned to watch the tall, handsome man begin to make his way through the crowd.

"Oh! There's Senator Astor," Brooke said. "I'd better go find my parents-they'll insist I 'greet him properly.'"

She made little air quotes around those last words and giggled before she disappeared into the crowd. I think I nodded, or smiled, or did something to acknowledge I'd heard her. At least I hoped I did. I hoped I wasn't as frozen in shock and confusion on the outside as I felt on the inside. I was thankful for a pa.s.sing waiter so I could deposit my mostly empty champagne gla.s.s on his tray before I dropped it.

The senator, and president of the Perceptum, progressed slowly toward the bronze plaque by which my aunt and Headmaster Stewart still stood, stopping every few steps to shake someone's hand or exchange a few words. Aunt Tessa had seen Daniel Astor, just as I had. The look of surprise on her face was probably similar to mine, though hers held only curiosity, not the fear I suspected I hadn't entirely disguised.

He was quite tall, taller than Carter, though not nearly as broad. Senator Astor was slim and elegant, in a fine gray suit that complemented his fair hair, handsome features, and blue eyes. Eyes from all over the room followed him from the moment of his entrance and he was clearly comfortable being in the spotlight. He carried himself in a way that showed his importance but also made him seem entirely approachable. I was sure he was an excellent politician.

I also didn't need Brooke, or anyone for that matter, to tell me who he was. In fact, I'd have known him anywhere, in any setting, and whether he was a senator or not.

He looked exactly like my father.

Chapter Four.

For a moment, all I could think was, this can't be happening, followed quickly by, how is this possible? I stared at Daniel Astor as he worked the crowd, unsure what to do or even if I believed it. I took a step closer, thinking I was seeing things, that my eyes were playing tricks.

On closer inspection, Senator Astor looked even more like my father, with the same sculpted cheek bones and same friendly smile I'd seen in photographs. The only difference was his hair and eye color. No doubt the rest of their nearly identical features they both inherited from the late Jacob Astor, their father. Carter might have thought of the senator as his uncle, but in reality, he was mine. The ident.i.ty of the older, important man Virginia Marwood had been so desperate to hide my father from was obvious now.

I was an Astor. An illegitimate Marwood-Astor and I was petrified.

I was also, as far as I could tell, the only person in the world who knew this and I intended to keep it that way.

Shaking my head, I broke from my stupefied trance and basically bolted toward my aunt. When I b.u.mped into someone in my haste, I realized drawing attention was the absolute last thing I wanted to do. Practice discretion, I reminded myself. The Perceptum motto came in handy more often than I cared to admit. I slowed down while I worked my face into something closer to surprise than horror.

When I finally reached my aunt, she put her arm around my waist and pulled me close to her while smiling at the small crowd still gathered. Headmaster Stewart remained nearby but was, I noted, actively tracking Daniel Astor's progress through the room. Good. I needed her distracted. Aunt Tessa lowered her voice and started to say, "Lainey, did you see-?" before I cut her off.

"I know, Auntie. I saw him. It's amazing, isn't it?" I hoped she couldn't feel my hands shaking.

She nodded and glanced back at the rapidly approaching senator. I had to get this taken care of before he reached us. "His resemblance is so...I can't even...But who is he?" she asked. "Do you know?"

I giggled softly, like this was only a strange coincidence and no big deal, and kept my voice as low as my aunt's. "Of course I know who he is. He's Senator Astor, Carter's uncle. The girl Jillian's father too, remember? He's also like the most important alum in the world right now." Here was my one chance to get her to drop it and I had to make it good. "So please don't say anything," I pleaded. "Please? It's just too weird. I don't want to make him feel uncomfortable and I...I don't want to talk about what happened to Mom and Dad tonight. Okay?" I threw in that last part on an inspired whim; it was actually harder for her to talk about them than it was for me.

She eyed me for a moment but then nodded in agreement. "Okay, I won't say anything. Yes, I promise," she added when I gave her a skeptical stare. My aunt was known for being chatty and rarely holding back what she wanted to say. "Honestly though, I'll have a hard time not staring at him."

"It's okay," I replied. "Everyone stares at him. See, even the headmaster." I gestured to Dr. Stewart, whose eyes still followed Senator Astor's every move. "I think he's probably used to it."

It was my aunt's turn to giggle, and if I hadn't been so freaked out by my own thoughts I would have realized that should have worried me. "He's certainly handsome, just like...well, you know. Yes, I'm sure he gets stares all the time."

He was also almost to us. Aunt Tess and I both put on our best smiles, hers completely natural, mine the best approximation I could come up with, just as Dr. Stewart stepped into our line of sight.

"Senator," she said smoothly and reached to shake his hand. "So good to see you, and thank you for attending. It's an honor to have you at such a unique event in the Academy's history." I wondered if I was the only one who realized the headmaster was a tiny bit in love with Senator Astor.

"Constance," he replied, grasping her hand in both of his. His voice was rich and warm, an extension of his charming smile, and as I observed them, I changed my mind. I probably wasn't the only one aware of the headmaster's feelings. "Lovely to see you, as always. And it is my honor to be here tonight. I only wish I'd been in time for the initial introduction, which I understand was extraordinary."

He turned to my aunt and me then and, if possible, turned on his considerable charm even more. I'd always thought Carter was especially charming and now I knew where he'd learned it. "Ms. Espinosa, I presume? Along with my nephew's winsome girlfriend? What a beautiful pair you make, almost as much a work of art as your magnificent installation. Pleasure to meet you. I'm Daniel Astor."

He extended his hand to my usually confident and unflappable aunt who-no joke-grasped it demurely and glanced down at her feet before meeting his undeniably appreciative gaze. Tiny warning bells sounded in my head, but they were faint and not yet enough for me to take seriously. My aunt couldn't really be attracted to a man who looked just like my father. Could she?

"Thank you, Senator," Aunt Tessa said. Her smile was absolutely radiant. "Just Tessa will be fine. 'Ms. Espinosa' makes me feel like my mother." She laughed lightly. "And it's certainly my pleasure to meet you and also to introduce my niece, Lainey. I understand you haven't met in person before?"

I fixed my smile in place as Daniel Astor focused his gaze on me. "No, not before now, though I've heard so many wonderful things about her, and, of course, will forever owe her a debt of grat.i.tude. Lainey, how do you do?" He shook my hand and held it. "And let me take this opportunity to thank you again for your bravery in saving my daughter."

There wasn't much I could really say to that, especially considering the true nature of my "saving" Jill. "Thank you, Senator. I hope Jill's doing well, and it's nice to finally meet you." I did my best to sound actually pleased to meet him, instead of panicked. I thought I succeeded.

He held my gaze and didn't release my hand for what felt like an eternity. "You as well, Lainey. And please call me Dan. Both of you. I insist." He nodded to my aunt. "Unfortunately, my late arrival caused me to miss your introduction. Would you mind repeating the story? I'm fascinated by what you've done here..."

Aunt Tessa gladly complied and she and Senator Astor became absorbed in discussion while I lingered nearby. Headmaster Stewart also lingered in the vicinity, growing visibly more annoyed the longer the senator-Dan, I reminded myself-worked his magic on a woman other than her. I was half listening to my aunt and half trying to figure out what to do about my new knowledge, when strong arms circled my waist from behind.

I almost screamed before I heard Carter's familiar voice in my ear. "Hey gorgeous," he said, kissing me on the cheek. "I'd ask what I missed, but I can see most of it, and it's incredible." Lower, he added, "Speaking of incredible, love the pants," and my skin flushed, only partly out of surprise.

"Hi!" I squeaked. I cleared my throat and turned, unable to hide my smile as I took him in. He looked great, as he usually did, but he'd changed out of his typical daily uniform of comfortable jeans and a simple T-s.h.i.+rt into a blue dress s.h.i.+rt with a tailored jacket and slacks in a color like steel or gunmetal. The combination made his already pretty blue eyes nearly arresting and somehow enhanced the handsome angles of his features. "You surprised me," I tried again and I was relieved that I sounded more like myself this time.

He returned my smile. "I know," he said. "You looked like your body was here but your brain was in another room, or like you'd just seen a ghost. I even waved at you when I came in."

I swallowed an inappropriate laugh or, possibly, a sob. He was more right than he knew and I was suddenly glad he hadn't been here earlier. "Sorry. I...guess I was daydreaming. And listening to my aunt talk about the installation. I didn't hear the whole story the first time."

"It's incredible," he repeated. "I should have been here." He glanced over my shoulder and nodded in the direction of Aunt Tessa and the senator. "And it looks like your aunt and my uncle have hit it off well. Did you meet him already?"

"Yes!" I said, too quickly and far too brightly. I mentally reminded myself to relax and Act. Freaking. Natural. I would have plenty of time to worry over what to do about my newly discovered relation. For now, I had to pretend that everything was perfectly fine.

But Carter confused my over-eager response for something much more common. He laughed and squeezed me a little tighter. "Yeah, my uncle's been known to have that effect on women."

I blushed again, but it worked. He couldn't know how creepy the idea that I found Daniel Astor attractive actually was, so I went with it. "No, it's not that! I mean, yeah, he's good-looking, for an old guy. He was just very nice." I lowered my voice. "You know I was...nervous to meet him."

"How many times did I tell you not to worry? And was I right?"

"You were right." I smiled and stepped closer to him. "Now kiss me h.e.l.lo while no one is looking."

He did, one hand running over my hair, the other slipping dangerously across the smooth black satin of my pants, before his lips pressed mine and held there longer than was probably polite. Kissing Carter was an invitation to a private world, like Oz or somewhere over Dorothy's rainbow, where time was inconsequential and my troubles melted along with my heart.

Tonight, he was exactly the distraction I needed.

THE REST OF the reception, and the dinner that followed, was actually fun, once I postponed my major freak-out and started to relax. I stuck close to Carter, letting his presence and his touch calm me while we mingled with the other students and our families. Senator Astor barely left my aunt's company after their introduction, except to spend time with Alexis and her parents. Mr. Morrow and the senator, I realized, were probably lifelong friends. Alex's cousin Mandi was with them too, and Senator Astor put his arm around her shoulders like a familiar uncle.

Alexis and I studiously ignored each other but she did manage a wave and a blinding smile for my boyfriend, not to mention some less-than-subtle glances his way throughout the private dinner for Legacy families and special guests. For my part, I barely bothered to sigh. I wasn't the only one who noticed though, and I don't mean Carter. Amy was always on top of things.

"Gawd," she said after we'd bid good night to our dates and our parents and walked up the stairs of our dorm. "Could Alexis be more obvious? I thought she'd have given up by now."

I was long past worrying about Alex and her designs on Carter so I actually laughed. "She could, you know. She has been before."

Amy snorted. "True. At least all she could do was eye him tonight. She wasn't close enough to drop her napkin and say h.e.l.lo from under the table."

I glanced back at her over my shoulder while I unlocked our door. "She wouldn't do that," I said, but I wasn't sure it was really true.

"No, you wouldn't do that. She totally would." We both slipped off our heels and flopped onto our respective beds. She was making fun of me, but I ignored it.

"You're right. But it doesn't matter, because he wouldn't let her."

"No, he probably wouldn't."

"Probably?"

She smiled. "Never underestimate the power of a hot, willing girl, Lane. Even with Carter. He's reformed, yeah, but he'll forever and always be a guy." She talked right over me as I started to protest. "I know, I know. You're not worried. And I don't really think you need to be, you know that. I'm kidding around. Mostly."

It was the "mostly" that actually did worry me. I never questioned how much Carter loved me, and he'd been resisting Alex's advances for years now, but doubt still crept into my mind on occasion, quite often in the form of Alexis's voice. Or my own worked just as well. I doubted myself better than anyone though I tried constantly to stop doing it. Tried being the operative word. It would have been great if my Marwood genes allowed me to kill old, bad habits instead of just people.

I sighed and rolled onto my stomach. "Don't you worry about Caleb sometimes too?" I asked. I already knew the answer, but it helped to hear out loud that your usually confident roommate had her moments of doubt too.

"Alex doesn't want Caleb," she replied but then got serious. "Of course. Once in a while. Who doesn't worry sometimes? But then he doesn't...anyway. Yeah, sometimes I worry, but not very much." I was about to ask her what she hadn't finished saying when she got up and started to change out of her suit. I a.s.sumed she was getting ready for bed, but instead of pajamas, she pulled jeans and a sweater out of her dresser. After months last semester of spending at least one night a week in our room by myself, you'd think I'd have expected it, but somehow I never did.

"Speaking of Caleb...I guess you're not staying here?"

She winked. "Not until the sun comes up anyway." It was well known around campus how easy it was to sneak in and out of someone's room, but that you had to do it all before sunrise.

I blurted out, "But your parents are here!" and then blushed at how foolish it sounded.

Amy, as usual, laughed at my innocence. "Well, yeah, but it's not like they're sleeping in either of our rooms! I don't think they'll catch us from their hotel in Brattleboro."

The heat slowly dissipated from my face. "You're right. Well, don't wake me up when you come back."

"I never do." She hesitated then, glancing at me several times while packing a few things into her bag. I should have known what it was about, because though she loved to tell me about her s.e.x life, she knew I didn't like to talk about mine, or the lack thereof. I also suddenly knew what she'd started to say earlier, something about how Caleb didn't have many reasons to be tempted by other girls. It went without saying that Carter did have one big reason, one he'd enthusiastically pursued before meeting me, and one that, if not Alexis, any number of girls would be glad to pursue with him again.

"Lane," she finally started but I interrupted her.

"If he's waited this long, he's not going anywhere."

She nodded emphatically. "I know that. I wasn't saying he was. But...well, I see you together and I know how in love you are-really, it's nauseating sometimes-so I just can't figure it out. What are you still waiting for?"

Good question. I looked at her for a long time before I finally gave the answer I'd wondered about myself.

"A year," I replied. "I'm waiting for a year."