The Privileges_ A Novel Part 6

"You might put on a s.h.i.+rt there, nature boy," Cynthia said to him, rolling her eyes at the girls, and so he stood up again and went to the bedroom to get one. Simon, having dried off the chairs and opened the umbrella that shaded the table, was pouring coffee and taking omelet orders. He was one of the house's amenities; in the hot off-season, he went to college in Atlanta, and in the winter he saw to the needs of the villa's guests and went home to his parents' place at night. Cynthia caught April and Robin nudging each other from time to time when Simon was entering the room, or leaving it, but that was okay. Let them. She prided herself on not talking to her daughter about s.e.x or men in the censorious way most mothers would.

"Robin," she said, "that skirt is so cute on you." They'd given it to her for Christmas, and Cynthia was proud of the rightness of it for her. She was fascinated with Robin, who had both everything and nothing. She just loved it that you could have such bitter f.u.c.k-ups for parents and still somehow foil them by turning out so sweet and poised and confident at age fifteen.

Robin paused before she sat down and gave a modest little comic twirl. "It's really beautiful, Cynthia," she said. "Thank you again. So, what's on the agenda today?"

"Hmm," April said. "Tanning by the pool for a few hours and then eating again?"

"That's what I love about you," Robin said. "Always willing to think inside the box."

"Adam," Cynthia said as he sat down again, "you're golfing this morning, right? What time?"

"Nine forty-two," he said.

"So precise," Cynthia said. "That's what I admire about golfing." Turning toward her son, she caught him artlessly checking out Robin's b.r.e.a.s.t.s again; Jesus, it must suck to be a boy, she thought. Completely pathetic and condemned to know it. "When are you going to initiate young Jonas into the golfing mysteries, anyway?"

Jonas dropped his fork and waved his hands in front of him. "Please, G.o.d, no," he said.

"Maybe someday when he's done something really horrible," Adam said. They fell silent as their plates arrived. The shadow of the villa receded over them as the sun rode a little farther up the sky. Adam drained his coffee and held his hand over the cup as Simon moved to fill it again; he excused himself and went to the bedroom to change into shorts and a collared s.h.i.+rt and a baseball cap. He threw his clubs in the back seat of their rental car and drove north on the island's one highway, past the overgrown lots and the discreet high-end resort entrances and the bright pastel exteriors of houses no one was living in anymore. At one point he waited patiently for some goats to develop the urge to get out of the road. He drove past the golf course and all the way to the little business district in Shoal Bay East, at the island's northern end. There was a bar there that was open even at ten in the morning; he parked in the shade behind it and walked across the street to the Royal National Bank of Anguilla.

It wasn't really much of a bank; it looked more like a doctor's office, with a heavy-lidded fat woman in a tight pink dress sitting at a receptionist's desk and a closed door behind her with a security camera above it. The woman was not someone Adam had seen before.

"Mr. Bryant?" he asked her. Regally she looked him over and then stood and pa.s.sed through the door behind her without a word. Adam looked up at the camera. In a few seconds she reappeared and beckoned him through, smiling now as she closed the door behind him.

Mr. Bryant rose from behind an old metal desk and shook Adam's hand; behind him were two low metal filing cabinets, the paneled wall, and, through a narrow window, the blue marina. "Merry Christmas to you, Mr. Adam," he said. "You have everything you need?" He meant at the villa. He had absolutely nothing to do with the villa or its operation, but he liked to ask. "You are enjoying yourself?"

"As always," Adam said.

"Your family is well?"

"Very well. And yours?"

Mr. Bryant nodded in answer, or maybe he was just nodding approvingly at the question. They would never meet each other's families, but the civilities could not be bypa.s.sed, as Adam had learned, when you dealt with Mr. Bryant. Now he unfolded his long-fingered hands, opened his desk drawer, and took out a collection of five checks, all for different amounts, all payable to cash, held together by a paper clip. He removed the paper clip and handed the checks to Adam. Adam looked them over, though not carefully; he folded them in half, put them in the pocket of his shorts, and rose to shake hands a second time.

"My friend says to expect him next around Easter," Adam said.

"At your service. When do you fly home?"

"Tomorrow."

Mr. Bryant clucked regretfully. "You'll miss the regatta," he said. "Oh well. Duty calls, I am sure." They shook hands yet again, warmly. Adam never understood why it was so important to Mr. Bryant to treat this like a friends.h.i.+p, but would not have dreamt of offending him either.

He drove back along a different route, taking his time, less for clandestinity's sake than to catch one last view of the hills of Saint Martin across the water before it got too hazy. It was still only about quarter to eleven, though, and a plausible round of golf had to last three hours at least. So he drove back to the course, went into the pro shop, and bought two large buckets of b.a.l.l.s for the driving range. He took the checks out of his pocket and zippered them into one of the compartments of the golf bag before he got started. It was so hot by now that he was the only one out on the range, but he didn't care. The heat rarely got to him, and the scolding a slight sunburn would earn him would only help cement the question of his whereabouts.

Half an hour later, sweat was pouring off him, but he was absolutely striping the ball, better than he'd hit it in months. He had the driver going a good 280 yards. He was so locked in, he wound up sorry there wasn't enough time to get out on the course after all.

There was a lunchtime board meeting of the Coalition for Public Schools at some restaurant down in Soho, which by any reasonable standard should have been over by three; but it wasn't, and when Cynthia couldn't stand it anymore she rose to excuse herself early, telling everyone she had a doctor's appointment uptown. She couldn't make it out the door without ten women stopping her to express the bogus hope that it was nothing serious. On days like this she just had to take a deep breath and remind herself that it was all for a good cause, namely the separation of these aimless gossips from some of their millions, so that those millions could start to do some good in the world. It took up a lot of time. You could just stay at home and write checks, of course, and when Adam had started making serious money that's all she initially thought she would do; but a big check was wasted on these halfwit dowagers with no idea how to do anything more substantial than send out invitations to a benefit, and before you knew it you were involved. Not just the CPS either; she'd become involved to various degrees with the Riverside Park Fund, the Coalition for the Homeless, and Big Brothers Big Sisters. She did have a rule about staying away from disease charities: there was something about them that just struck her as especially haughty, a blithe tossing of money at the ineffable, like Won't You Please Join Us in the Fight Against Death. She knew on some level she was wrong about this but obeyed the feeling anyway. She preferred causes that dealt with what might actually be improved, not the hard-to-fathom world of genes and viruses but just the generally f.u.c.ked-up way in which human inst.i.tutions worked-homelessness, public schools, Habitat for Humanity, things like that. Anything that improved the lot of children got her money in a heartbeat. "You're sweet," Cynthia said, smiling and backing away, "but no, it's nothing major, just something I scheduled months ago, and you know how hard it is to get in to see these guys." Which probably left them all thinking that she was going in to get her a.s.s lifted or something, but so what. In truth all she had to do was make a phone call, but it was a private one that had to be made before close of business and she had lost faith that they could wrap up this meeting in time. It was a kind of universal truth in the nonprofit world that everything took at least twice as long as it needed to. She used to have to schedule her shrink appointments for five in the afternoon, because her commitments had grown to the point where that was the only window; but if she had an evening event, as she often did, there were days when seeing the shrink meant not seeing the kids at all, and so she'd finally just quit therapy altogether. No room in her day for it anymore, which was probably the best circ.u.mstance for terminating, she thought, and probably why doing so had turned out easier than she'd expected.

Despite the accursed narrowness of those Soho streets, her driver was idling right there in front of the restaurant. They inched toward the West Side Highway and she started to open up her phone right then, but she didn't want to make the call in front of the driver either. He was totally trustworthy but it had nothing to do with that. Half an hour later she was home. They'd been in the new apartment on Columbus for almost two years now, after a restless few years in the place on East End she'd loved so much when they bought it. Almost as soon as the renovations were done she'd started glancing adulterously at the real estate section. But the priceless thing about Adam was that he didn't really give her much more than one night's s.h.i.+t about it, because the truth was, he understood. He got why she didn't mind packing up again, why there was such romance in the new, why it was so hard to stay in a place that had maxed out its own potential. Plus they'd made a fortune each time they sold. This was Manhattan, after all; everyone wanted a foothold, and they weren't making any more of it.

Still, the place on Columbus was so wonderfully eccentric that Cynthia couldn't imagine ever growing tired of it: a penthouse duplex that looked directly down onto the planetarium behind the Museum of Natural History. At night the spheres glowed blue through the planetarium's gla.s.s walls, and from the wraparound windows thirty stories up it seemed to Cynthia almost like their home was returning to the planet after a day's journey into s.p.a.ce. The kids had the downstairs floor mostly to themselves; it had a separate entrance, which meant she had less of a sense of their comings and goings than she used to. They were too old to want or need an escort back and forth to school, and they had so much else going on in their lives, socially and otherwise, that it wasn't always possible to know exactly when she'd see them next. Or Adam, for that matter.

Which could sometimes give rise to a sort of loneliness; but today Cynthia was just as glad to come home and find n.o.body else there. It was still well before five, so she called their accountant; she knew he would have taken a call from her no matter the time, but she liked to be considerate about it. She asked if he would please handle a wire transfer for her, a small one, just ten thousand, but it was important that it be done right away.

"Charles Sikes," she said.

She heard him typing; he wore one of those phone headsets, like only receptionists used to wear. "Same account as before?"

"Same bank, different city," she said, and dug a folded, typed letter out of her pocket and read him the number. He took it down, and then as he always did he asked after her kids, whom he'd never met but knew in his way, and then they said goodbye.

Still no one home. The winter sky outside the living room was just beginning to gray. She opened up a bottle of wine, took one cigarette out of the pack she kept hidden behind the leather-bound volume of wedding photos on the bookshelf, put her coat back on, and stood outside on the balcony that overlooked the planetarium. She spent maybe twenty minutes that way, looking down on the still planets, listening to the symphony of faint sounds that pa.s.sed for silence. Then, in a spirit of beneficence, she opened up the cell phone again and called her mother.

Ruth seemed almost miffed to hear from her, though no more miffed than she was by anything that rose up unexpectedly in her day without giving her adequate time to prepare. "We are doing as well as can be expected," she said. "Warren's health is not good, as you know."

She didn't know; or maybe she did-in her mother's conversations it was hard to separate fact from dire prediction. "Well, tell him I hope he feels better."

"How are the children?"

"They're great. So busy I hardly see them anymore. The amount of schoolwork they have is just brutal." There was a pause, and somehow Cynthia knew what was supposed to go there. "I'm sorry we haven't been able to get out there to visit."

"Probably not the best time for a visit anyway," Ruth said.

"You're right," Cynthia said, misunderstanding her. "It's impossible to get away. Sometimes I wonder why they have to work so hard. But then just last week I was in this public school in East Harlem-"

"Good Lord, why?"

"This charity I work with. We were dedicating a computer lab. Anyway, you wouldn't believe-"

"Your education was always very important to me," Ruth said. "That came first."

Cynthia laughed affrontedly and took another quick drag. "Are you joking?" she said, exhaling. "Dirksen? That place was like a drug bazaar. There was an English teacher there who killed herself over Christmas break. Remember that? It's a miracle I learned a f.u.c.king thing at that place."

Ruth closed her eyes. She was trying to get some dinner ready, even though Warren probably wouldn't eat any of it; he was so sick he hadn't been out of the living room chair all day except to go to the bathroom, and even for that he had to call out to her. She missed part of what Cynthia was saying because when he got a coughing jag it was so heart-wrenching that she couldn't hear anything else. "I don't know what you expected me to do about it," she said. "There certainly wasn't money for private school. It was hard enough to hold on to the house those years."

"There are ways," Cynthia said, tossing her cigarette over the edge of the patio railing, hearing a key turn in the front door inside. "It's just a matter of where your priorities are."

"Well, anyway," Ruth said. "You certainly managed to land on your feet."

Me: SWM, 27-Big Mets fan, good income, not afraid of adventure. Willing to think long term, or, if you prefer, NSA. You: athletic, 1924, long hair. Not afraid to act if the moment seems right. Send photo, plz.

He left out, of course, any references to his face, specifically his nose, because while some women were into it, most, he found, were not. But that seemed fair, since he hadn't mentioned anything about what he liked or didn't like in a face either-those faint mustaches, for instance, which were a total dealbreaker. He hit Send and switched back to the streaming video of Kasey in her apartment in California. Maybe it was California. The windows were always covered, so she might have been in Bayside for all any of her subscribers really knew. Right now she was in the kitchen making herself some kind of smoothie. There was a laptop on the kitchen counter near the blender, as there was in every room of Kasey's house, and so she could see, as he saw, the requests typed in by feverish guys: Take off your top. Mmm how's that taste? It was pretty embarra.s.sing. He'd stopped communicating with Kasey himself months ago, but he still watched her, and the meter still ran on his credit card.

Would like b.l.o.w.j.o.b without paying for it is what his personal ad should have read, that is if there were any such thing as an honest personal ad. People said that there were women out there, maybe not a lot but some, who thought the way guys did, but that had to be a myth. The truth was, he had zero interest in thinking long term-that was just one of those things you had to say if you wanted to get any responses at all. He was just so on edge all the time, but that tension could, if you willed it, channel itself into the s.e.xual and thus could be relieved. It always worked, and it never worked for long. He had a lot of stress in his life to fight off.

And as if to punish him for letting that thought into his head, the cell phone rang in his bedroom. He had three cells, actually-they were lined up on top of his dresser-but he could tell from the ring that it was the disposable.

"Devon, what's up," Adam said, but it didn't sound like a question. "So we have some Bantex, right? Financial services? Start shorting it. We can take our time, though. We have a couple of months. So go slowly. Spread it out."

That was always his mantra: spread it out. No more than a certain number of shares in one transaction, because anything over that number supposedly tripped SEC radar.

"Huh," Devon said. "How about that. I was just reading that they were doing really well."

A silence.

"I know, I know," Devon said. "The less I know, the better." Adam sounded like he was in a taxi. "So what shall we talk about, then? How's the family?"

Adam laughed, not unkindly. "They're good, thanks. Listen, you know we shouldn't stay on any longer than we have to. I'm sure a single guy like you has got plans, anyway."

"Mos def. I have a date."

"My man," Adam said. "Enjoy." He hung up. He was so f.u.c.king cool all the time. In one way it would have made Devon feel better to hear, even just once, a little panic in his voice, but in other ways it would have made him feel infinitely worse. It was like high school all over again with that guy. He was one of those alphas, master of every situation, receiver of every gift, one of those guys you made merciless fun of until the day he actually brought you inside the circle and then you turned into a simpering little b.i.t.c.h. They saw each other very rarely-maybe three or four times in the last year-but in the aftermath Devon always felt humiliated by how slavishly he had said yes to everything.

He put the phone down on the dresser and went back to the screen, but Kasey was in the bathroom; there were cameras in there too, of course, but he scowled and went to the kitchen to see if there was anything to eat. Some people were into some perverse s.h.i.+t.

They'd brought in a couple of other people-they'd had to, to keep things sufficiently spread out-friends of his from the old boiler-room days on Long Island who now worked at more legit houses. They'd set up accounts for one another's aunts, cousins, whatever they could get doc.u.mentation for, and siphoned the trades through there. To most of these guys Devon himself was the ringleader, the mastermind, though without a tip to act on, of course, they were all nothing but a group of enlisted men with a willingness to get ahead. His stomach felt like s.h.i.+t again. Maybe because he hadn't eaten anything, but that, he was reminded as he opened and closed the freezer a couple more times, was only because there was f.u.c.k all to eat around here. He took the bottle of pear vodka out of the freezer instead, and in the cabinet it turned out there was still half a bag of salt-and-vinegar potato chips. Presto. Dinner.

He poured himself some vodka and sat down in front of the computer. Kasey was sitting at the kitchen table writing something-paying bills, maybe?-but at least she had her pants off now, which was promising. His own apartment had a pretty Spartan look to it, which was to say that it had a couch and a flat-screen TV that were both huge and expensive, and a rug that was huge and not expensive, and that was it. Nothing on the walls. He'd bought some kind of print of the Golden Gate Bridge and hung it on the wall over the couch, but he just felt stupid and pretentious looking at it-like, do I actually give a f.u.c.k about the Golden Gate Bridge?-and he took it down. In the bedroom was a bed and a dresser and a closet, and underneath a ceiling panel in the closet was a gym bag with about a hundred and sixty thousand dollars in it. This, Devon felt, was the true source of his stomach problems, though he also wondered if that was just dramatic nonsense, if his stomach would quiet down if he ate the occasional well-balanced meal and generally just took a little better care of himself.

He went back to the kitchen to throw out the chip bag and returned with the pear-vodka bottle. The stuff tasted like Jolly Ranchers after a while. Why did he have to get stuck with all the grunt work? The money was pretty much its own answer, even though the more he made, the harder it got to figure out how to spend it, or even where to put it, without attracting attention. Jesus, just one good b.l.o.w.j.o.b would go such a long way right now, he thought. There was an outcall service just a few blocks away; he had it on speed dial. He called them up and asked if Teresa was available tonight, just so he could clear his mind of the whole thing. f.u.c.k Bantex, until tomorrow anyway. It was all that paranoia about being watched that was making him feel sick all the time. He bet the rest of them felt sick too. But no one is watching, he thought as he logged off of Kasey and put the bottle back in the freezer and picked some laundry up off the floor. He was the one doing all the watching. That's what you paid for. I see you, but you don't see me.

t.i.tles were considered unimportant at Perini but a natural hierarchy evolved and was respected. Sanford's reliance on Adam made him the de facto number two; he spent more of his time out of the office now wooing investors in the fund, drinking with them, charming them, impressing them, seducing them into confidence even after the rare misstep or during the always-brief lean times. Precisely the kind of thing Sanford himself used to do all day long-and still did, though he had less of a taste for it now, and also seemed to recognize that youth itself was part of the package that investors wanted to be sold. Sanford himself didn't really look any older, just more dissolute, a little puffier and less put together.

No one else there begrudged Adam the boss's favor; it was a measure of their comfort with it that they made jokes about San-ford's obvious late-stage conversion to h.o.m.os.e.xuality at every opportunity. Every job but Adam's and Bill Brennan's had turned over at least once since Adam had arrived there; Parker had finally been belittled into quitting almost three years ago, and since he'd stopped coming to basketball, Adam had no idea what had become of him. The office's basic fraternal atmosphere was unchanged. Most of them were younger than Adam now, but he could still outrun them and outlift them and outdrink them and while they honored his status as their superior, in every important way he fit right in. Still, there was of course something momentous about his very presence in that office that none of them even suspected, and their not knowing sharpened the borderline Adam prized between his own character and theirs.

Friday afternoons at work tended to devolve into a head start on the younger employees' bachelor weekends, with beer and foosball tournaments and a general disengagement from their adrenalized professional selves; usually the last hour of work was turned over to discussions of why the bar they went to last Friday sucked and which one they should try tonight instead, but on one particular spring afternoon they managed to talk Adam into coming with them to some catered event they knew about that was taking place inside the Delacorte Theater in Central Park. A fund-raiser for something or other. Brennan had tickets and they all wanted Adam's company so badly that they even offered to pay for him. "I cannot get too hammered," Adam said. "Tomorrow's my son's birthday." Something else to drink to. They took over one of the round tables on the bare stage and there they met their waitress, whose name was Gretchen. Gretchen was provocatively tattooed and reluctantly conceded that she was an actress and would not tell them her age, which led to a general consensus that she was no more than twenty-two.

"G.o.d, I love me some of that hipster p.u.s.s.y," Brennan said.

"Because they hate you. That's why."

"Yes," he said. "Yes. Because she hates me. That is precisely why."

They kept ordering more drinks so that Gretchen would have to return to their table, and each time she stopped there they did a clumsier job of chatting her up. They thought their own artlessness was hilarious. Gretchen knew better than to flirt back, but she was enough of a pro, Adam saw, not to let her contempt for these guys show either. The tips were becoming outrageous.

Somehow a serious betting pool took shape around the question of whether Gretchen's tongue was pierced. She came back with a round of Maker's for everyone but Adam. It impressed him that she wasn't a little frightened of them by now. "Gretchen," Brennan said earnestly, "I don't want this to come out wrong, but if you open wide and say Aaah, you will make me a rich man."

"You gentlemen have a good night," Gretchen said, smiling. She cleared the last of their gla.s.ses and walked away. A few minutes later Adam stood up to go home, prompting a wave of questions about the staunchness of his heteros.e.xuality. Instead of heading out the theater gate, though, he turned and went underneath the grandstand, where the kitchen and bar setups were, and when he found her, she rolled her eyes and smiled.

"Pay no attention to me," he said. "I'm counting your tattoos."

"Well, you won't get an accurate count," she said.

"I'm a very busy man. I have to get back to the table soon because I'm in charge of the centerpieces. We're planting them in the Sheep Meadow. So I just need your phone number and I'll be on my way."

She turned and looked at him, her head at an inquisitive angle, and he could tell she was amused not by anything he'd said but by something else about him. "How drunk are you?" she said.

"Not at all. I just have to see you again. I don't want to live in a world where women like you are never seen again."

She stared at him as the bartender loaded up her tray. "Oh, this," he said, grabbing his ring finger, "this comes right off."

She laughed. "Leave it on," she said. "I like married guys. Keeps things on a basic level. You're happily married, am I right?"

"Extremely," he said.

She pulled his hand toward her and wrote a phone number on it. "Wow," Adam said. "What a world."

The sun set in front of him as he walked west out of the park, the long shadows behind him gradually merging into nothing. He took his time; it was probably one of the five most beautiful nights of the year. In the rare moments when he stepped back and thought about it at all, it was vital to Adam's conception of his professional life that he wasn't stealing from anybody. There was nothing zero-sum about the world of capital investment: you created wealth where there was no wealth before, and if you did it well enough there was no end to it. What Adam did was just an initiative based on that idea, an unusually bold manifestation of it. Why should he be restricted-or, worse, restrict himself-from finding a way to act on what he was enterprising enough to know and to synthesize? It took leaders.h.i.+p skills as well, because you couldn't pull off something like this by yourself even if you wanted to. In order to minimize the risk he had to command the total trust and loyalty of Devon and the handful of his friends he'd brought in on it from brokerages around the city. And that he had done. Devon had turned out to be a young man p.r.o.ne to anxiety but whenever he seemed close to the point of bailing, five minutes together was enough for Adam to rea.s.sure him they still had the whole thing safely in hand.

It wasn't even his chief source of income, at least not anymore. His compensation at Perini had soared, and deservedly so. This was more in the nature of a self-administered bonus. In the course of his work he learned some things about a given company, things not of a public nature; based on this information he gave Devon an instruction on the buying or the selling of that company's stock, spread out through about thirty small accounts with dummy names managed by Devon and the others; each account transferred its profits to different offsh.o.r.e banks, all of which then sent the money, in slow increments, to the Royal National Bank of Anguilla, where oversight policies were business-friendly. Adam's share in the last year was less than half a million. It was a nice margin to have, certainly, and every little bit added to the range of possibilities in his family's lives. But they didn't depend on it. He could have ended the whole scheme at any time and, in terms of their daily lives, they very likely wouldn't feel the money's absence at all.

But it wasn't just about the money, in any case. More than the money, which had to be spent with some care, it was about exercising that ability to repurpose information those around him were too timid or shortsighted to know what to do with: the night two weeks ago, for instance, when he and Brennan had sat there in the office having a Scotch after working late and had shared a laugh about Brennan's former frat brother who worked at Bantex, who had just called him up scared s.h.i.+tless because his entire office had just been served with grand jury subpoenas. That was what kept the whole scheme fresh at this point, that was its engine and its reward: the sense of living in two realms at once, one that was visible to others and one that was not. Every day he looked right into Sanford's face and confirmed with wonder that the old man was so blinded by affection that he didn't even see him.

Inside an empty playground Adam found a water fountain and washed the ink off his hands. He made no effort to memorize the phone number first; he hadn't even glanced at it. It wasn't the first time he'd done something like this. He'd never cheated on Cynthia and never would, because that would be weak and stupid, and the risk so much greater than the reward. But sometimes there was a thrill in walking right up to that line, and in charming the other person into stepping over it. He figured it was probably all downhill after that moment anyway.

He turned left at 77th and from that angle he could see the windows of their home high above him as he approached; the only ones lit were downstairs on the kids' floor. He took the elevator all the way up and walked into the moonlit living room. There was no note for him anywhere but he was pretty sure Cyn had told him where she had to be tonight and he'd just forgotten. The curtains blew toward him where the patio door had been left open. There was always TV but right now Adam just felt like talking to somebody; if he'd known he was returning to an empty home, he might have stayed out. He dropped his jacket on the couch and took the interior staircase, which was behind the kitchen, down to the second floor. All the doors were closed, as always, but there was some kind of noise escaping from Jonas's room. He knocked; no answer came, but the noise didn't stop either, so he knocked again and walked in. There were boxes and packing material all over the floor, and on top of Jonas's dresser, incredibly, was a turntable with a vinyl record spinning on it. Adam couldn't remember the last time he'd even seen one. Jonas, who had his headphones on, swung his feet down from his desk and smiled.

Adam pointed at the record player and then held his palms up to mime confusion. Jonas took the headphones off. "Mom and I decided to celebrate my birthday early," he said. "Isn't it beautiful? Thanks, by the way."

Adam, laughing, shook his head. There were two chairs in his son's room and they were both filled with LPs in their covers, probably forty or fifty of them, none of which had been there the day before.

"The sound just doesn't compare," Jonas said. "It's so warm. I can never go back to digital after this."

Adam walked over to the still-spinning turntable and saw what was playing: the Buzzc.o.c.ks. "April home?" he said. "I saw her lights on."

"Her lights are always on. She's out somewhere. She's the Queen of the Night."

Adam flipped through the record pile. There was a fair amount of music he recognized, which was itself a little perplexing. The greatness of The Clash was indisputable, he supposed, but were kids Jonas's age really still listening to it? Wasn't that the whole point of music-that you had your own? For Adam, music was tied to time: most ineffably it served as the soundtrack to high school and college. Beyond that he had never given it a lot of thought. The names in the pile began to get even older and more obscure: Television, Fairport Convention, Phil Ochs, the Stanley Brothers.

"And how about you?" he said. "It being a Friday night. Any plans? A date, maybe?"

Jonas rolled his eyes. "Yeah, we've all got big dates," he said. "And then there's the church social, and then we're all going to the soda fountain for a cherry phosphate."

Cynthia worried lately that Adam and Jonas weren't as close as they used to be, and while Adam didn't know about that-was it even healthy for a teenage son to be all that close to his father?-it was true that they were growing conspicuously unlike each other. At the same time, there was a kind of Spartan streak in his son that Adam recognized and respected. He'd gone vegan, for instance, which, even though it was not something Adam would have done in a million years, was certainly a form of discipline in the interests of the body. Still, having spent his own high school years as a virtual president of the mainstream, he couldn't help but find Jonas's taste for exile a little hard to understand.

He moved one pile of records from a chair to the floor and sat down. "So, punk," he said. "That was before my time, even. I didn't know you were interested in that." His son nodded, like some sort of scholar, less a nod of agreement than a nod to indicate that it was a worthy question. "That was probably the last really genuine thing to happen in pop music," Jonas said. "It was exciting while it lasted, though, which was about five minutes."

"But people your age still listen to it?"

"People my age," Jonas said, "are mostly morons."

"Wait a minute, though. Aren't you in a band? The band is still together, right? I a.s.sume you're not playing old s.e.x Pistols songs?"

"That is kind of a sore subject right now," Jonas said.

Adam held up his hand to indicate that they would speak of it no more. He picked up an alb.u.m by Flatt & Scruggs; he didn't know the first thing about them but for some reason, gazing at their suits and crew cuts and formal smiles, he was struck by a kind of pity for them, because they were so dead. "There wasn't a lot of music in our house growing up," he said. "The stereo was like a battlefield. Your uncle Conrad and I kept breaking the rules-mostly about volume; I think the rule was no higher than four-and then the ban would come, no more music in the house for a day, a week, two weeks. We couldn't help it. We'd hear something on the radio, and when it got to the point where you couldn't stand waiting a few hours for it to come on again, we'd go out and buy it at Walgreens or someplace, and if it was any good obviously we'd turn it up. Then we'd forget to turn it back down, and a day later Dad would flip on the radio to hear Paul Harvey, and it would come on at ear-splitting volume."

Jonas nodded as if this story served to confirm something he'd known all along. "Music sucks now," he said. "It all comes out of a factory. It's not about anything except wanting to be famous. How people can even listen to it is beyond me."

Adolescence was all about overstatement; still, it made Adam sad to hear his son talking this way. "Well, cheer up," he said. "Maybe punk is poised for a comeback."