Job - A Comedy Of Justice Part 68

'Why not?' asked Jerry.

'Five centuries? They won't even speak the same language. There will be no one who knows a hot fudge sundae, from curried goat. Customs change.'

'So you reinvent the hot fudge sundae and make a killing. Don't be a pessimist, son.'

'Would you like one right now?' asked Sybil.

'I don't think he had better mix it with Jack Daniel's,' Jerry advised.

'Thanks, Sybil... but I'd probably cry in it. I a.s.sociate it with Marga.'

So don't. Son, crying in your drink is bad enough crying into a hot fudge sundae is disgusting.'

'Do I get to finish the story of my scandalous youth, or won't anybody listen?'

I sai 'Katie, I'm listening. You made a deal with Joshua.'

'With his spies. Alec love, to anyone whose love and respect I want - you, I mean I need to explain something. Some people who know who I am - and even more who don't - cla.s.s Rahab the harlot as a traitor. Treason in time of war, betrayal of fellow citizens, all that. I -'

'I never thought so, Katie. Jehovah had decreed that Jericho', would fall. Since it was ordained, you couldn't change it. What you did was to save your father and mother and the other kids.'

'Yes, but there is more to it, Alec. Patriotism is a fairly late concept. Back then, in the land of Canaan, any loyalty other than to one's family was personal loyalty to a chief of some sort - usually a successful warrior who dubbed himself "king". Alec, a wh.o.r.e doesn't - didn't - have that sort of loyalty.'

'So? Katie, in spite of studying at seminary I don't really have any sharp concept of what life was like back then. I keep trying to see it in terms of Kansas.'

'Not too different. A wh.o.r.e at that time and place was, either a temple prost.i.tute, or a slave, or a self-owned private contractor. I was a free woman. Oh, yeah? Wh.o.r.es don't fight city hall, they can't. An officer of the king comes in, he expects free tail and free drinks, same for the civic patrol - the cops. Same for any sort of politician. Alec, I tell you the truth; I gave away more tail than I sold - and often got a black eye as a bonus. No, I did not feel loyalty to Jericho; the Jews weren't any more cruel and they were much cleaner!'

'Katie, I don't know of any Protestant Christian who thinks anything bad of Rahab. But I have long wondered about one detail in her - your - story. Your house, was on the city wall?"

'Yes. It was inconvenient for housekeeping - carrying water up all those steps - but convenient for business, and the rent was low. It was the fact that I lived on the wall that let me save General Joshua's agents. Used a clothesline; they went out the window. Didn't get my clothesline back, either.'

'How high was that wall?'

'Hunh? Goodness, I don't know. It was high.'

'Twenty cubits.'

'Was it, Jerry?'

I was there. Professional interest. First use of nerve warfare in combination with sonic weapons.'

'The reason I ask about the height, Katie, is because it states in the Book that you gathered all your family into your house and stayed there, all during the siege.'

'We surely did, seven horrid days. My contract with the Israelite spies required it. My place was only two little rooms, not big enough for three adults and seven kids. We ran out of food, we ran out of water, the kids cried, my father complained. He happily took the money I brought in; with seven kids he needed it. But he resented having to stay under the same roof where I entertained johns, and he was especially bitter about having to use my bed. My workbench. But use it he did, and I slept on the floor.'

'Then your family were all in your house when the walls came tumbling down.'

'Yes, surely. We didn't dare leave it until they came for us, the two spies. My house was marked at the window with red string.'

'Katie, your house was on the wall, thirty feet up. The Bible says the wall fell down flat. Wasn't anyone hurt?'

She looked startled. 'Why, no.'

'Didn't the house collapse?'

'No. Alec, it's been a long time. But I remember the trumpets and the shout, and then the earthquake rumble as the city wall fell. But my house wasn't hurt.'

'Saint Alec!'

'Yes, Jerry?'

'You should know; you're a saint. A miracle. If Yahweh hadn't been throwing miracles right and left, the - Israelites would never have conquered the Canaanites. Here this ragged band of Okies comes into a rich country of walled cities - and they never lose a battle. Miracles. Ask the Canaanites. If you can find one. My Brother pretty regularly had them all put to the sword, except some few cases, where the young and pretty ones were saved as slaves.'

'But it was the Promised Land, Jerry, and they were His Chosen People.'

'They are indeed the Chosen People. Of course, being chosen by Yahweh is no great shakes. Do you know your Book well enough to know how many times He crossed them up? My Brother is a bit of a jerk.'

I had had too much Jack Daniel's and too many shocks. But Jerry's casual blasphemy triggered me. 'The Lord G.o.d Jehovah is a just G.o.d!'

'You never played marbles with Him. Alec, "justice" is not a divine concept; it is a human illusion. The very basis of the Judeo-Christian code is injustice, the scapegoat system. The scapegoat sacrifice runs all through the Old Testament, then it reaches its height in the New Testament with the notion of the Martyred Redeemer. How can justice possibly be served by loading your sins on another? Whether it be a lamb having its throat cut ritually, or a Messiah nailed to a cross and "dying for your sins". Somebody should tell all of Yahweh's followers, Jews and Christians, that there is no such thing as a free lunch.

'Or maybe there is. Being in that catatonic condition called "grace" at the exact moment of death - or at the final Trump - will get you into Heaven. Right? You got to Heaven that way, did you not?'

'That's correct. I hit it lucky. For I had racked up quite a list of sins before then.'

'A long and wicked life followed by five minutes of perfect grace gets you into Heaven. An equally long life of decent living and good works followed by one outburst Of taking the name o Lord in vain - then have a heart attack at that moment and be d.a.m.ned for eternity. Is that the system?'

I answered stiffly, 'If you read the words of the Bible literally, that is the system. But the Lord moves in mysterious -'

'Not mysterious to Me, bud: I've known Him too long. It's His world, His rules, His doing. His rules are exact and anyone can follow them and reap the reward. But "Just" they are not. What do you think of what He has done to you and your Marga? Is that justice?'

I took a deep breath. 'I've been trying to figure that out ever since Judgment Day... and Jack Daniel's isn't helping. No, I don't think it's what I signed up for.'

'Ah, but you did!'

'How?'

'My Brother Yahweh, wearing His Jesus face, said: "After this manner therefore pray ye: " Go ahead, say it.'

"Our Father, which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done -'

'Stop! Stop right there. "Thy will be done -" No Muslim claiming to be a "slave of G.o.d" ever gave a more sweeping consent than that. In that prayer you invite Him to do His worst. The perfect m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.t. That's the test of Job, boy. Job was treated unjustly in every way day after day for years - I know, I know, I was there; I did it - and My dear Brother stood by and let Me do it. Let Me? He urged Me, He connived in it, accessory ahead of the fact.

Now it's your turn. Your G.o.d did it to you. Will you curse Him? Or will you come wiggling back on your belly like a whipped dog?'

Chapter 28.