The Bleeding Worlds: Resonance Part 33

His mind raced at the possibilities of what contact would feel like.

"Go ahead," Sophia said. "It's part of why you're here."

A chill ran through Gwynn, his nerve twisting into a knot in his stomach.

"What will it feel like?" he asked.

"There's only one way to find out. Don't worry, I won't leave you."

They glided toward the stream of runes. Gwynn reached a tentative hand outward and eased it into the current. His body went straight and rigid as the sensation of cold water poured over, and then into, his hand, up his arm, and filled his body from the center outward.

"Oh G.o.d," Gwynn said through grit teeth. "It's too much. I can't contain it all."

Sophia pressed her right hand into the stream. Instead of being filled to the point of bursting, it changed to a current, rus.h.i.+ng in his left arm, circulating through his body, and leaving through the remains of his right arm and Sophia's hand.

"I said you would need me," she said.

"But you're only touching it with one hand. How is it flowing out of me but not hurting you?"

Warm lips brushed against his neck.

"Silly boy. In this place of souls, we're as close to being one as any two can. Besides, it wants this."

"It?" he asked. "You mean the tree-Yggdrasil?"

"Mhmm. I told you, the Veil thrives from its connection to our world. Even if the tree doesn't actually say so, it still has a will. And that's for you to keep the cycle intact. Now stop asking silly questions and concentrate. You'll need what you learn here when you visit the well for your arm."

"I will be able to get my ar-"

"Shush. Concentrate. Try to feel the flow of energy and understand its meaning."

The energy ran into his body through his hand. What was there to learn? Looking closer at his left hand, he saw the runes flowed around his hand like a rock in a stream.

"But..." He flexed his hand within the flow of runes. "It feels like..."

"Keep going," she said.

Gwynn tried to focus on the point of contact-ignoring the rus.h.i.+ng cold within his body.

Is it flowing into my hand?

"It's not, is it?" he said aloud. "But if it's not flowing into me..."

The sensation wasn't dissimilar to tearing the Veil. To his mind, he'd always envisioned the energy of the Veil flowing into him. But what if that wasn't true? What if contacting the Veil just awakened something inside him?

"The runes in the tree are causing a reaction in my body-nothing is flowing into me. Which means you don't have anything flowing out your arm back to the tree. You're just...calming the reaction inside me?"

"Good, yes. Everything is connected. The barriers between ourselves, the Veil, and everything in our world are based on the arrangements of energy. What if I told you the sensations you're experiencing are your own runes, or atoms, or G.o.dhood, whatever you want to call it, resonating with those of Yggdrasil?"

"But I felt it everywhere, like my whole body was filled."

"Do you think a Fragment would feel the same thing?"

Gwynn smiled.

"I'm guessing the answer is, no. You wouldn't ask me otherwise."

"True," she said. "So if your entire body is reacting to these runes..."

"Then they exist within me. And if they exist within me..."

"You can control them. Contacting the stream is awakening even the most dormant of your abilities. This is what it means to learn the runes. Test it against the tree-just by trying to alter the flow."

He used the same technique Fuyuko taught him all those years ago-creating an image in his mind. As silly as it seemed, he envisioned his hand emitting a gust of wind-scattering the runes like a leaf blower sends leaves flying.

The runes' motion flickered-no more than a pebble thrown in a river.

Gwynn set his jaw and envisioned the stream of wind from his hand increasing.

He could swear the runes were laughing at his efforts and mocking him with their persistence.

"Dammit. You say Woten did this all on his own?"

He felt Sophia shrug behind him.

"To be fair, he had been an Anunnaki for a lot longer. And people were generally more aware of their bodies and nature. Over time, our dependance on technology has separated us from both."

Gwynn tried harder, imagined the power dragging from his feet and the top of his head, pressing up and down, and out his hand. Beads of sweat trickled down his trembling face.

"I...can't."

His hand dropped from the rune stream. Breaths came in ragged, uneven, heaves.

"Dammit."

Sophia released her grip on his abdomen and let her left hand rest on his.

"You're trying to fight against all of creation through blunt force. Do you really think that's going to work?"

He couldn't tell if she was mocking him or seriously asking.

"Plenty can be accomplished through force of will," she said, not waiting for his answer. "But change is a lot easier if you can get others on your side. Don't try to move the whole stream at once-instead, try to encourage the closest ones to move, and let them spread the word along the stream. Think of it like basic science-transfer of energy. A cup which is cold heats up as it absorbs the energy from the heated liquid inside. You can do the same thing-transfer a bit of your energy, and let the rest travel through osmosis."

When his breathing normalized, Gwynn eased his hand back into the stream of runes.

Not a gust of wind, blowing all of them away.

Gwynn searched for a new image, finally settling on the one Sophia planted in his mind.

Just like hot liquid, my hand is an energy source.

He tried to envision it-energy radiating in small waves from his hand, infecting the immediate area, which then transmitted the energy-his very will-out to the rest.

It took a minute, then the runes flickered, and the ones closest to his hand s.h.i.+fted.

The s.h.i.+fting and flickering turned to waves, cras.h.i.+ng away from his hand in all directions.

"Wow."

The surprise in her voice made him smile.

"Your hot cup a.n.a.logy worked," he said.

"Apparently."

Next, he moved on to recognizing specific runes-making runes signifying water brighter, s.h.i.+fting fire runes to the left. It all hinged on finding the right image in his mind.

"Congratulations." Her warm breath tickled his ear. "You've attained the same power as the All-Father."

"Does that mean I can get my arm and go home?"

"Soon. Just a little more."

She backed away. It felt like losing a piece of himself.

Gravity slammed into him like a fist, pus.h.i.+ng him downward with the flow of Yggdrasil's runes.

"Sophia!"

Had she been holding him up all this time?

"It's okay," she said.

Her voice still sounded near, though he couldn't see her.

"Fall, fall, fall," she said. Her voice sounded singsongy, dreamy, like she wasn't actually talking to Gwynn. "A dragon for evil and a dragon for good. The shadow rises. Don't let it drown you."

"Help me," he said. "I'm falling."

The glow of Yggdrasil's runes snapped off, like someone hit a switch.

This feels familiar. Have I been here before?

"It's the final step," Sophia said directly into his ear. "Will you dare what even Odin did not?"

"I did this before. Pridament stopped me-he said I was going out of control."

"Mhmm. I guess that could happen. But how do you know until you try?"

"But I have a family to get back to. You said I needed to stop Cain."

Her fingers brushed his cheek.

"You wanted the power to defeat him, didn't you?" she asked. "If so, this is the final step of your journey. Being able to reach out to the world, to let yourself be absorbed into it, will bridge the distance between you, Odin, Cain, and any others who might challenge you. Because opening yourself to others is the place neither of those men could go."

With the glow of the runes gone, Gwynn couldn't see anything. But he still closed his eyes, making the darkness personal. Slow breaths, a steady rhythm of inhalation and exhalation, fought against the raging of his heart.

Just let go.

Were these his own thoughts, or had Sophia said the words?

Just let go.

This time, these were his own.

Stop fighting. Let my limbs be loose. Don't fight whatever comes.

His heart slowed. Anxiety left his body with a long exhalation.

Water embraced him. It didn't feel like he'd crashed into its surface. Instead, it seemed to flow up around him, like he'd never truly been falling in the first place.

"Do you remember?" Sophia asked him.

He couldn't see her in the darkness, but from the sound of her voice, she hovered directly above him.

Gwynn sighed. Sensation started leaching away from his extremities.

"A ripple," he answered. "A ripple in an ocean turning into waves in every direction. I was in those waves, in each drop of water reaching out to every corner."

"Yes, that's right."

She kissed him on the lips. Not forceful, or pa.s.sionate. It felt like goodbye.

"Let go," she whispered.

Gwynn rushed out in all directions. Or he never moved but was just aware of all directions. He couldn't recall coming apart, so maybe he hadn't. But this was the Veil, and he couldn't trust anything.

Reality sighed and quaked with the scurrying of trillions of lives. Even objects he didn't a.s.sociate with living, like rocks and bones of things long dead, stirred and buzzed-lights of differing intensities in the darkness. They whispered to him, spoke of hopes and dreams, memories of things past, and forgotten histories. Some lamented opportunities squandered and aspirations unfulfilled.

He could brush against the full range of experience-all of it different, and yet all the same. Sophia had been right, everything was connected. By transferring his will to those things closest to him, he could travel outward and contact anything or anyone. Was this G.o.d's power-to be in all things, know all things, at all times? Could any human being, Anunnaki or not, be capable of this and stay sane? Should any human be capable of this?

This was the final solution-a loss of self so complete he could never be a whole person again. Was that his answer-G.o.d was here, but so spread out within every thing, it could never be realized as a whole ent.i.ty? Would the same fate fall on Gwynn?

"No. Not yet."

The waves he'd rode out on rushed back, cras.h.i.+ng against each other, leaving him whole and disconnected from the noise of existence.