Alaska Twilight Part 7

"Suit yourself." Ed shoved it at him.

"Makes you wonder what could have been so bad at home, doesn't it?" Ed asked. "Did you ever hurt her, Tank?"

Tank's boots. .h.i.t the floor, and he stood so fast, the chair he was sitting on toppled to the floor with a clatter that made Chet jump. "I loved Leigh," he said. "I would never have hurt her." The doubt on Chet's face pierced him as he turned and rushed away.

Eight.

The bright May sun in a brilliant blue sky caused new life to grow almost visibly minute by minute. Haley watched, mesmerized, throughout the long days. The rest of the crew arrived from their break in Anchorage, and taping began in earnest. There were no more close calls with the bears, who seemed to grow used to the cameras and the man who talked to them.

The day had warmed up, and she snapped pictures, then headed back to camp. She couldn't remember ever having been so tired and knew it was from both mental and physical strain. Tonight she was particularly exhausted as she settled on a log and watched her companions. They were nearly as entertaining as Survivor.

Haley glanced at the sky, bright though it was nine o'clock. She didn't know if she'd ever get used to the nearly constant daylight. Lucky for her, she didn't have to get used to it, she reminded herself. This exile was only temporary. Before she knew it, she would be back in the bright lights and excitement of the Valley of the Sun. Just thinking about Camelback Mountain looming over the Phoenix metro horizon made her loneliness increase.

Augusta stood. "I'm restless. I think I'll go for a walk."

Haley looked up. "Want to play euchre?"

"No, I need to think about the book and stretch my legs."

"Not a good idea," Tank said. "At least take the dog. His barking will keep any bears away."

Haley dragged herself to her feet. "I'll go with you."

Augusta laughed. "You said that with all the enthusiasm of a person going to the gallows. I'm fine, darling. I won't go far."

"No, no, I'll go with you." Haley grabbed her walking stick. "Which way?"

Augusta frowned. "I'm not a child. You know I value time alone. I need creative time. I won't be coddled. You all are smothering me."

"I'll be quiet, and you can think. Which way shall we go?"

Augusta sighed, then shrugged. "Toward the hills. Maybe we can climb a bit and get some good landscape pictures." Her grandmother skirted Cary and Erika Waters, the couple in charge of sound and film editing, and took off away from the lake. "I don't mean to be unkind, but those two don't look like they go together," Augusta whispered when they were past. "Erika is a head taller and orders him around like he's her younger brother."

"I think he is."

Augusta stopped, then burst into laughter. "I thought they were married."

Haley giggled. "You're such a romantic. They even look alike if you consider their noses."

"I never noticed."

They hiked for fifteen minutes before they reached the base of the rocky hillside. "You sure you want to go up there?" Haley asked. Climbing would be difficult for her.

"You wait here. I'll just go up a little ways." Augusta stepped to the top of a large black-and-white rock.

Haley sighed. She couldn't let Augusta go alone. Oscar barked and ran past her. He disappeared behind a bush. His barking changed to a frightened yip. She frowned and walked to where he'd disappeared. She prodded the large bush with her walking stick, then flattened it slightly. The opening of a cave yawned in front of her. She stumbled back and dropped her stick.

"What is it?" Augusta came back down the few steps she'd taken. She stooped and peered into the cave. "Oscar, come back here." The dog was practically crying. "I think he's trapped."

"No, he's not," Haley said. "Oscar, come here, boy." She tried to sound excited and coaxing. The dog responded with more pitiful howling.

"He's trapped. We have to get him out." Augusta got on all fours and started to crawl into the cave.

"No!" Haley sprang forward to prevent her grandmother from entering the cave. "Don't go in there." Her knees wobbled along with her voice.

Augusta looked up at her. "We can't leave him, Haley. I'll be fine."

"I'll go." She got on her knees and pushed the bush farther out of the way. She poked her head into the cave, but it was too dark to see anything. The rush of musty cave scent, hatefully familiar, closed her throat.

She jerked her head out. "I can't." She covered her face with her hands and sat down with her boots splayed in front of her. She was such a failure, such a coward. Hugging herself, she rocked back and forth.

"Oh, Haley, darling, don't." Her grandmother embraced her.

"Don't go in there, Nana, please don't." She buried her wet face in Augusta's neck.

Her grandmother ran her hand over Haley's hair. "You haven't called me Nana in years."

"You told Aunt Caroline it made you feel old."

"It did. Is that why you stopped?"

She nodded, her face still against her grandmother's neck. "I know it wasn't easy to have your life disrupted by an eight-year-old. I thought if I was your friend and not just your granddaughter, you wouldn't send me away."

Augusta didn't answer right away, but her arms tightened around her. "I won't lie to you, Haley. I was furious with your parents for doing that to me and expecting me to give up my freedom. It was hard to write at times with a child around, not to mention the doctor visits your leg demanded. I know I haven't always been the easiest person to live with. Both of us have an artistic temperament, and that's made life interesting, but I wouldn't give up the years we've spent together. I would never have sent you away. Right from the start, there was a special bond between us."

"I knew that, deep down." Haley pulled away at another whimper from the dog.

Her grandmother stood. "You stay here and keep Oscar calm. I'll go get Tank. We need a flashlight anyway."

With the comfort of her grandmother's embrace removed, Haley felt cold. She watched Augusta hurry away in the direction of the camp. Her facade of competency and self-sufficiency lay in crumbled pieces around her. Oscar's wails sounded tired. "It's okay, Oscar," she called. He knew better, just like she did.

Oscar's trembling finally stopped, and he lay on Haley's lap. Tank had quickly extracted Oscar from the hole after inserting only the front half of his body into the cave. Haley should have been able to save her own dog. Denny stared pensively into the fire. He brushed at the hair the wind blew over his eyes. Augusta's Alphasmart keyboard made a comfortable clacking sound that filled the eerie quiet.

"Do you ever get used to the silence out here?" Haley asked Tank, who sat on a rock tending the fire.

"I love it," he said without looking up. "No blaring horns, no engines, no people. Just me and the beauty G.o.d created. Out here you can get away from the noise and learn what's important."

Haley stroked Oscar's ears as he nestled comfortably against her. "That's a pretty sweeping statement. What's important is different for every person."

He looked up then and closed his notebook. He folded his big hands in his lap. "Not really, not at the heart level. We can easily get sidetracked into thinking ambition or money is important, but you can't take them with you. Love for G.o.d and family, finding your purpose in the eternal scheme of things-that's what's really important. The other stuff is just icing. Thinking they're key is like stuffing ourselves on candy so we're not hungry for the food that actually nourishes us."

"Very profound, Tank," Augusta said, setting aside her keyboard.

Haley struggled to hide her irritation. "I don't think anyone can know where they fit in the eternal scheme of things." She'd attended church with Augusta every week for years, but she got tired of hearing Christians spout off about purpose and destiny. One kindhearted friend of Augusta's had even gone so far as to say Chloe's death had a purpose. If Chloe had died for some nefarious purpose of G.o.d's, Haley didn't want anything to do with him.

She stood. "I think I'll turn in." Tank's pa.s.sion for the subject warned her that he was just getting wound up, and she didn't want to be preached at any more tonight.

"I'll be right behind you," Augusta said.

Haley saw the understanding flash between Augusta and Tank, and her irritation rose. Let them think she was a heathen. She didn't care. Others had accused her of the same thing, but they hadn't walked in her shoes. Let one of them watch his or her sister die and see how quick they were to talk about G.o.d's love.

She grabbed her backpack with one arm and tucked Oscar under the other, then went to the tent. Lifting the flap and stepping inside, she flipped on the lantern and dropped her pack in the corner. She put Oscar down, and he went to nose at her satchel. The unzipped contents lay open to view. She could have sworn she'd left it zipped and at the head of her sleeping bag instead of in the middle like it was now. Could Augusta have been looking for something? She pulled the bag to her and rummaged through the contents. Someone had rifled through it. The sweats she slept in were no longer on top but had been shoved down the front of the bag.

She glanced around the tent, trying to see where she'd left everything. Her memory pulled up images of how the tent had looked when she last stepped out. Augusta's bag had been moved about a foot from the corner where Haley's backpack now lay. The entire camp had come out to watch Tank save Oscar, and there had been no one around the camp for about an hour.

She stepped outside the tent and walked back to the fire. Augusta and Tank seemed deep in some kind of intense discussion. Probably religion. It was a good thing Haley had decided to vacate. "Augusta, were you looking for something in our tent?"

Augusta stopped midsentence. "Why no, Haley. I haven't been in the tent since we left this morning. Is something wrong?"

"I don't know. It looks like someone has been looking through our things."

Tank frowned. "I haven't seen anyone near your tent since we got back. Are you sure?"

"It looks like it to me."

"Maybe a hiker happened through camp while we were out bear watching," Denny suggested. "Someone could have looked through the tents."

"Maybe." Haley shrugged. "I guess it doesn't matter, since nothing is missing. I just thought it was strange. Good night." She went back to her tent. Pouring some water into the tin cup she brought, she brushed her teeth, then sat on her sleeping bag and pulled off her prosthesis. She changed into sweats and crawled into the sleeping bag. Oscar snuggled against her.

She could feel every lump, every transition in the ground under her. Though she was tired, her mind wouldn't shut off. When she heard Augusta coming, she rolled so her back was to the opening and shut her eyes. The last thing she needed to hear was Augusta scolding her for being rude to Tank. Maybe she had been. But that didn't mean she wanted to listen to a lecture.

Augusta moved through the tent preparing for bed. Haley heard her grunt as she climbed into the sleeping bag.

"These old bones don't like sleeping on the floor," Augusta said. "I know you're awake, Haley. You can't fool me."

Haley sighed and rolled over. "I was in no mood for a sermon. I know I was rude. He deserved it."

Augusta sat up and struggled into a cross-legged position. "I can't abide rudeness, Haley Walsh. You owe that young man an apology. Just because you're finally here and facing what you did doesn't mean you can take it out on someone else."

Oscar yelped, and she realized she was squeezing him too hard. "Sorry, boy," she muttered, loosening her grip. "I'm not taking it out on him. The shrink said to face it, and that's what I'm doing. But I hate the sanctimonious type."

"You know what I think about your shrink. G.o.d is the one you need to turn to. He can wipe all that away. Your guilt has affected every part of your life. It's crus.h.i.+ng the life right out of you. Tank is right. Out here, you can get a handle on what's important. Your sister has been at rest for twenty years. She would want you to find some peace."

"You make it sound so easy!" Haley sat up and faced her grandmother. "You don't know what it's like to be responsible for the death of someone you love." She picked up her prosthesis and shook it. "It's not like I can just forget about it."

"G.o.d can heal you if you let him," Augusta said quietly.

"He let my sister die. I prayed and prayed all night long, but Chloe died anyway. What good is prayer when he doesn't listen? He hates me just like my parents did. Maybe Chloe would have lived if I hadn't prayed!" Her throat constricted, and she couldn't talk anymore. She flung herself back into the sleeping bag, then curled into a ball with her back to Augusta. Talking never solved anything. It never had.

"Haley, you're acting like a child," Augusta said. "Turn around and talk to me."

"Good night, Augusta," she said with as much finality in her voice as she could muster. "I don't want to talk anymore."

Augusta sighed. "Good night, Haley. I'll pray that you will be able to accept G.o.d's love and mercy."

After a few more shuffles, her grandmother settled down. A few minutes later, Haley heard a gentle snore. She punched her pillow and flipped onto her back. Oscar growled in protest of her movements, and she patted his head. Sleep felt as far away as the Lower Forty-eight.

Haley rolled over and looked at her watch. 3:00 a.m. Twilight had given way to darkness, but she was wide awake. Oscar snored by her ear, and Augusta kept tune with him. She wished she could close her eyes and forget where she was. Something rustled at the tent opening. She strained to see in the darkness. It was probably the wind.

It didn't feel like the wind. She felt a presence, a deliberate movement. Chloe? A shadow moved across the shaft of moonlight that peeked in through the tent opening. She tried to sit, but her muscles refused to obey. The darkness flowed as thick and seamless as midnight around her, and she squinted to make out the dark shadow. It seemed large and hulking-menacing.

Haley froze. She opened her mouth, but her throat was too tight to force out a scream. She wet her lips as the shadow moved into the tent. She reached out her hand for a weapon of some kind. Her hand closed on her prosthesis, lying beside her sleeping bag. Move. She heard the sound of a zipper. He was opening her backpack. The figure started to turn toward her. Oscar awakened. He snuffled, then jumped to his feet and began to bark. The intruder turned toward her. A ski mask covered his face. Drawing back her arm, Haley threw the prosthesis at the intruder. It flew through the air end over end and thumped him in the side of the head, driving him to his knees.

He took hold of the artificial limb and swiped at her backpack, catching it up. Haley threw herself across the ground and snagged one handle of the pack. "That's mine," she panted. She tugged the pack out of his hand as he stumbled out of the tent. "Augusta, help me!"

"What is it? Who's there?" Augusta's sleepy voice pulsed with alarm. She raised herself on one elbow.

Flashlights flicked on outside the tent. A beam of light moved toward their tent. "Here, in here!" Haley shouted. Her hands shook as she felt for her prosthesis but touched only the slick fabric of the tent floor. She squinted and looked around the dim light of the tent. Surely the intruder had dropped it. She couldn't lose her leg.

The tent flap opened, and Tank rushed inside. He held the lantern aloft, and though the light was weak, it pushed back the shadows. Haley didn't know whether to shrink back into the corner and hide her missing leg or to kiss him for chasing the darkness away. She lifted her chin and decided not to hide.

"What's happened? Are you all right?" His gaze flickered to her face, then to the flat area of her sweats where her bottom right leg should be. His eyes widened, and then he blinked and seemed to hide his surprise.

"I'm fine," she said shortly. "There was an intruder trying to take my backpack. Could someone get me a long stick I can use as a crutch? My prosthesis is gone, and the walking stick is too short to support me properly." Gone. Her earlier dismay began to fade. She'd have to leave, go back to Phoenix. She'd get out of this hateful place. Her gaze fell on her grandmother's face, and her elation ebbed. Augusta needed her here. She'd have to figure out how to get along without her prosthesis. Or get a new one.

Tank cleared his throat. "Did you get a look at the intruder?"

"It was too dark. I heard him open the zipper, so I threw my leg at him. He still tried to take my backpack, but I tackled it and managed to jerk it from his hand. It had my camera in it."

"You think he was after your camera?"

"It's an expensive one," she admitted. "I guess that could have been the target. There wasn't much else of value in it."

Denny brought her a thick stick. "I think it's a little long," he said. He took off the bear amulet around his neck. "Here, a little Native magic will protect you."

Augusta put her hand out and closed Denny's fingers over the figure. "You keep your amulet, Denny. My prayers are protecting my granddaughter."

Haley tried to hide her smile at her grandmother's tact. "Thanks." She struggled upright and leaned on the stick. "Some makes.h.i.+ft crutches would be useful. Something from a tree fork maybe."

"I'll find you something," Tank said.

"You should have told me you were handicapped," Kipp said. "How are you going to hike out of here with only a stick?"

"I'll call for a plane," Tank said. "She can't hike out of here on crutches. Do you have access to another prosthesis?"

"I might have to go back to Phoenix for another one. Or I could call my friend, Savannah. I accidentally left my old one at her apartment when I flew into Savannah to pick up this new one."

"Savannah from Savannah?" Erika Waters lifted an eyebrow. "I bet she gets jokes." About thirty-five, Erika was nearly six feet tall with flaming red hair that had to come from a bottle. Haley wasn't totally positive Erika had been born a woman. There was something about the way she walked and used her hands.

"And hates them," Haley said. She brightened at the thought of talking to her friend. Savannah would help her put this place in perspective. "I'll have her send it out right away."