Shadow Wranglers: Slade Part 40

"And you like fire."

"Yes."

She could feel how much he did. He'd never been afraid of the fire, but walking into it was new to her. "Because the s.e.x is good?"

"I can get s.e.x anywhere."

"Lovely."

He shrugged. "It's the truth, but a woman who makes me smile just by being in the same vicinity? A woman who gives without losing herself? A woman who is smart, s.e.xy, and has a wicked sense of humor? A man could spend eternity looking for that woman."

"So you got a bargain. You only spent a hundred and fifty years searching."

He didn't answer. She felt the touch of his mind on hers and then the immediate withdrawal. "What's wrong?"

"I'm trying not to influence you."

She started to unb.u.t.ton his s.h.i.+rt. "Why? Do you think I'm so weak I can't resist your charms?"

He caught her hand. "Because everything inside me says to not give you a choice. To take what I want and to h.e.l.l with the consequences."

An honorable man. In any place and time, deserving of respect. Her man. Jane slipped her hands free and started on the next b.u.t.ton.

"So you intend to have a platonic relations.h.i.+p with me for the next twenty to thirty years?"

"h.e.l.l no."

She smiled to herself. "Then what are you offering?"

"Whatever we can manage without going too far."

Two more b.u.t.tons fell to the wayside. "And what happens if we go too far?"

"You won't go alone."

She slipped her hands inside his s.h.i.+rt, savoring the contrast of his hair-roughened skin against her smooth palms. There was a time when she would have found his statement unbelievable, but she'd sat at Slade's side when he'd faced death. Felt the unimaginable pain of her soul being ripped apart. "I do believe that's the most heart-wrenching thing anyone has ever said to me."

"It's the truth."

She went back to unb.u.t.toning his s.h.i.+rt. His stomach sucked in as her knuckles grazed his abdomen.

"I know, but I don't want you to die for me, Slade."

"What are you doing, Jane?"

"Unb.u.t.toning your s.h.i.+rt."

"Why?"

She looked up. "Allie suggested it as a way to improve your mood."

The smallest of smiles touched his lips. "I think it's her s.h.i.+rt she unb.u.t.tons when Caleb starts yelling."

Spreading his s.h.i.+rt open, Jane ran her finger down the center of his pecs. Muscle jumped under her fingertips. She s.h.i.+vered remembering how he felt against her when he came over her. Closing her eyes, she projected the sensation to Slade. His response was a mental growl. She liked it when he growled. All their hottest moments started with a growl. "But I like your chest much better."

Leaning forward, she touched his right pectoral with her tongue. He tasted so good. Another growl rumbled in his chest. She smiled.

His grip tightened on her nape, pulling her up. With a slash of his nail, he cut her s.h.i.+rt open. "Come here."

She went, meeting him halfway, opening her mouth to his, her mind to his, letting his pa.s.sion roll over her, feeling his delight beneath. He liked that she initiated this. He liked the feel of her skin, the touch of her tongue. He liked her.

She blinked and pulled back. "You really do like me."

Frowning down at her, he let her take a step back. "What the h.e.l.l made you think I didn't?"

"I'm a stuffy scientist, and you're ..." With a wave of her hand she indicated his washboard abdomen, his broad shoulders. His handsome chiseled face, the raw s.e.xuality he exuded so effortlessly. "Good grief, look in the mirror." Could vampires see their reflection? "If you can that is."

"I'd rather just get my impressions from you. You make me sound downright irresistible."

"You are."

And it scared her. She was always in control, but with Slade there was no control. She had to trust him, and honorable man or not, she found trust hard.

His thumb smoothed the moisture from her lips. The heat in his eyes kept her blood simmering. "Why?"

She didn't pretend to misunderstand. "You were in my mind. You know why."

"The man in your past."

"Yes."

"Tell me about him."

She didn't want him anywhere near this relations.h.i.+p.

"You already know."

"I know what I saw."

"Then that's enough."

"No, it's not."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"We have to."

She stepped back, pulling her s.h.i.+rt around her, feeling exposed where before she'd been comfortable. "No."

He looked around. Following his gaze, she noticed faint movement in the distance. The guards and other members of the compound. Her night vision wasn't as good as his, but it was definitely better than she'd had a week ago.

"But maybe not here."

"Not anywhere."

"But we can talk about my being a vampire?" he asked.

"It's not the same thing."

"They're both standing between us."

"That's not true. I've never wanted what happened to come between us."

"That doesn't mean it's not between us. It's there in your mistrust, in your holding back, in your fear of commitment."

"I've never-"

Slade's expression hardened. His energy snapped out. "I know what he did to you, Jane. I know whatyou planned to do to him. What I don't know is how to get you to see me without the taint of him."

She'd had no idea he'd felt that hesitation in her, but she should have. She took another step back. His fingers slid down her arm. He caught her hand and stopped her retreat. She shook her head. "I didn't come here to talk about this."

"What did you come to talk about?"

"Forever."

Energy leapt from his hand to hers. She absorbed it, feeling his excitement, his panic, and ultimately his denial.

"No."

This time it was she who halted his retreat. "I've decided I'm interested in forever."

"I can't give it to you."

Panic flared inside, immediately soothed by the touch of Slade's energy.

Broderick walked by. He gave a curt nod in response to her h.e.l.lo. It was as close to a snub that a pack member could give another without coming to blows. She watched him walk away. "He's not very pleased with me."

"His pride's hurt. It's hard for a young wolf to accept any loss, but to a woman ..." He shook his head "Well, it's probably safe to say he'll never live it down that a woman took mental control of him."

A woman? Sheesh. Her sympathy faded. "Holding on to chauvinistic views will do that to you."

Slade chuckled.

She licked her lips. The conversation was now back on the subject she wanted to broach. The one she was afraid to broach. What if Slade didn't really want forever? What if he just felt safe offering it because he thought it could never happen.

"I'm not that complicated, Jane."

"d.a.m.n it, stop reading my mind!"

"Then stop refusing to talk to me about the elephant in the room."

He wanted to talk about her stepfather Jerry. The man who'd made her childhood h.e.l.l. "Maybe I don't want to talk about the elephant because it's ugly and I don't want it in our house!"

"s.h.i.+t, Slade," Jared commented as he came up the path from the main house, rifle barrel resting on his shoulder. "Even I know you don't give a woman an elephant and expect a smile."

"Son of a b.i.t.c.h. Go shoot something, Jared."

Jared stopped. Dropping the rifle off his shoulder, he turned it sideways and held it out to Jane.

"You want to borrow this?" With a jerk of his chin he indicated Slade. "He's healed enough; anything less than a head shot won't kill him."

"Yes." She glared at Slade. "I mean no. But thank you."

Slade put his arm around her shoulder and drew her away from the gun. "Don't encourage him, Jane. He's recently decided he has a sense of humor."

All the Johnson brothers looked similar. The differences lay in their eyes and their personalities, and Jared came off as hard as granite. His cracking a joke was definitely out of character.

"Least I know not to try and tempt Raisa with a G.o.dd.a.m.ned elephant. Allie's right. We've got to get you out of that lab."

"The h.e.l.l you do."

"Though this"-Jared tipped his black hat, indicating their closeness-"is a good start. Nothing like soft moonlight and a pretty woman to get a man's mind off work."

Slade shot Jane a suspicious look. "Did you give Allie that idea?"

"Me? I'm in the lab as much as you."

Jared's chuckle drifted behind him. "We do occasionally figure things out for ourselves, you know."

Slade groaned. "There goes the peace and quiet of my lab."

"Would that be so bad?" Jane asked.

"It depends. Are you going to give me a reason to be elsewhere?"

"I'm trying, but you keep changing the subject."

"It's all the same subject, sweetness. Just different parts."

She moved back into his arms. She didn't even try to mask the satisfaction she felt at the connection. "I'd rather concentrate on this part."

His hazel eyes searched for hers. Stubbornness settled into his expression. She added a mental plea to the mix.

"Unfair, Jane."

"I don't care. I've spent twenty years making that part of my life not matter, and now you want to bring it into the one good thing I've got." She slapped his chest. "Yes, I'm going to fight you. I'm going to fight you with everything I have." She wanted to hit him again, harder. Hard enough to make him understand. "I have to, Slade."

"s.h.i.+t." He caught her hand and brought it to his lips. The kiss was soft, gentle. Understanding.