Blue Collar, White Collar, No Collar Part 3
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"Never. No. There was no pattern."
"You never commented on their clothing or anything like that?"
"I'd say, you look nice today. With Deirdre I started having to say it because most days she came in looking like she'd spent the night out on the street doing tricks and got drugged up and left for dead. She was at the front desk, for Christ's sake. Can't I get some people to say how she looked? She looked terrible."
"She claims she was drinking because of the-the pressure you were putting her under. The-the hara.s.sment."
"It's a lie. Rudy, it's a f.u.c.king lie. And I'm going down the f.u.c.king drain with it and it's not right. It's not right."
The Colemans have had a very good marriage, that they seldom remarked on. It's been their life, and though to outsiders they might have seemed to take it for granted, they were often very grateful for each other in the nights, sometimes without quite being aware of it as grat.i.tude. Neither can imagine, even now, how it might be to end up having to live without the other. They raised Janine. Or, rather, Anya. They went through the loneliness that followed upon her leaving them, and they had grown used to having her gone.
One of the manifestations of this loneliness was that Coleman took into his circle of affection the two young women who worked for him. Deirdre and Linda. They had gone to school together-they were only a couple of years older than Janine/Anya. Once he invited them to the house for a cook-out, with Peg and a few other people-neighbors, and some others from the sheriff's office. Everyone had a fine time until Deirdre, very drunk, began to cry for no reason. Linda helped her out to the little Toyota they had arrived in, and drove her away. Later that night, while the Colemans were undressing for bed, Peg said that Deirdre reminded her of Janine a little, and seeing her that way, crying, sloppy, falling all over herself, a spectacle, made her worry about Janine in a way she hadn't been accustomed to worrying particularly. Janine had been so well focused in her teen years. And now she was experiencing unsuccess and disappointment, all those miles away.
"It was as if I was given a vision of Janine acting like that on somebody's patio in Los Angeles County."
Coleman agreed. It was true.
And he worried all the more as Deirdre started coming to work late smelling of mint and alcohol. The rest of that summer and into the fall. There were days she never even bothered to call, and Linda would lie for her then, claiming that she had called.
"I'm gonna have to let her go," Coleman told Peg. "And it scares the h.e.l.l out of me. Like I'm letting Janine go, somehow."
"You feel like you're firing Janine," Peg said.
"That must be," he told her. "Must be part of it."
It was during high school that Janine first showed serious interest in the performing arts. Peg had taken her to ballet cla.s.ses and dance cla.s.ses from the time she was a little girl, but a lot of little girls were in those cla.s.ses. Janine, by the time she finished high school, was playing summer stock in the dinner theaters of the valley. Coleman still wonders if she really has any talent. He's not gifted with an ability to tell, has no ear for music, nor any sense of how acting happens. He likes to read, and rarely watches any television, and the movies seem too much the same: nudity, language, an excess of explosions. Noise. The ubiquitous ba.s.s voice whispering the words of the previews. It's always the last battle for humankind, the race to save the whole world, the future. Or else it's too cute or outrageous for words, with lots of quirky characters you wouldn't want to know. Janine/Anya wants to be a part of that, and her mother has always believed in her.
But privately Peg has expressed her conviction that Hollywood is politics, who you know-all those children of movie stars, starring in their own movies, with careers of their own: the sons of Lloyd Bridges; the Fondas, the daughters of Janet Leigh and Cliff Arquette and Blythe Danner. It's difficult for her to believe poor Janine/Anya has much of a chance. And the name change did hurt her feelings. Before Coleman's trouble broke upon them, she had resolved that during this visit she would question her daughter about settling down in a job here in Charlottesville.
Perhaps that won't come up now. Coleman doesn't want it to, knows it will lead to arguments and tension. Before Janine/Anya left for California there was plenty of that to go around.
Standing out on his porch, he looks across the road to the tall oaks bordering the field on that side. The sun blazes on the leaves, and above the trees a crow swoops and dives to avoid a darting blue jay. Perhaps the crow is looking for a meal in the blue jay's nest. Now it's a pair of blue jays, hara.s.sing the crow, making a racket that you can hear above the sound, in the near distance, of a lawn mower. Coleman steps down into his gra.s.s, which is striped with Peg's pa.s.ses through it, and walks around the house, to the outside of the spare-room window. There's an abandoned bird's nest attached to the underside of the porch at this end, but no sign of a yellow jackets' nest. He goes farther along the wall, and around to the back of the house, crouching low, trying to see under the boards of the deck there. His back hurts. Behind him, over the sound of the lawn mower, comes the voice of the neighbor, Mr. Wilkins, shouting at his eleven-year-old son.
"Pull it back, you idiot. Back around. For Christ's sake. Pull it BACK."
Coleman looks at them, small in the distance, two acres away, the man standing there with his hands on his hips, and the boy trying to maneuver the lawn mower that's bigger than he is. The boy's trying to pull it back up the small incline beyond a shrub, and is not succeeding. His father shouts at him. "Pull it back, you idiot. BACK. Can't you understand English?"
The boy finally gets the mower level again, then tries leaning into it, facing it toward the lawn, away from the incline.
"Not that way. Use your head."
It goes on.
Coleman turns back to his house, and sees a bee float out from a crack in the plaster, just beneath the east-facing window of the spare room. He steps closer. Wilkins's shouted curses make him wince. He glances back and sees the boy struggling with the mower, Wilkins following close behind, poised as if about to strike. "You don't have the brains G.o.d gave green apples. Look at you. I swear you'd foul up a steel ball!"
Coleman tries to tune it out. He watches the place in the plaster, the seam where the house and the foundation meet. Another bee comes from there, and still another. In a minute or two, several come and settle close to it, then enter. After a time, Coleman goes up on the deck and in through the back door. Peg is working the puzzle.
"It's a nest, all right."
"I already called them," she says. "They can be here in a couple of hours."
"Can you hear what's going on out there? He's at it again. That poor scared little boy. I was sheriff, after all. I really ought to go over there."
"Stop talking about yourself in the past tense."
"Well, I was." He can't keep the anger out of his voice.
She says, "I'm sorry."
He looks out the window, at the scene of the boy struggling with the heavy machine, and the man moving along slow behind him-a tall, rounded figure of disapproval. Wilkins gesticulates, shouting. The boy works in a feverish, hopeless hurry to get it done.
"You know the terrible thing?" Peg says. "I used to talk to Mrs. Wilkins when Janine-when Anya-was in school. The librarian, his wife. I ought to be able to remember her first name. All they think about is that boy-they actually believe it's for his benefit. It's all out of love. Think of it. They believe they're doing it right. She yells at the poor kid, too. I've heard her over there letting him have it, the same way."
"Jesus," Coleman says. "Somebody ought to do something."
"How long have we been saying that?"
He occupies himself in the workroom, sanding the crest of the clock he's been building: yesterday, while cutting the wood according to its pattern, he allowed the blade to gouge it slightly at one edge. The inside of the mechanism, the weights, the chain, and the pendulum, are all connected and ready. He has finished the trunk, and the plinth, or base. The moon dial and the clock face are installed. As it has begun to look like itself, the hours he worked on it have increased.
Peg calls him when the pest control man drives up. She has spent the last hour out in front, pulling weeds out of the flower bed. Coleman finds them already walking around the house, to the site of the nest. Peg wears a red bandanna and white garden gloves, and she's carrying a trowel. She laughs at something the pest control man says, and in that sunny, gra.s.s-smelling instant, seems completely her old self. This tricks Coleman into forgetting the misery they're in. The pest control man is young, and dark, a quiet, shy-seeming boy, with round features and intelligent, humorous eyes. He knows his work, recognizes immediately that there is a nest in the wall, and that it will take a spraying of foam between the foundation of the house and the ribs of the inner walls to eradicate it. Also, the hole itself must be sealed with mortar.
"They can have a pretty good-sized nest built up in a day or so," the boy says. "They work fast this time of year."
He walks back to his truck, glancing toward the Wilkinses' house as he goes. Wilkins is alone there, now, weeding in his own garden patch. Peg stands a little to one side, gazing at the place where the yellow jackets lob themselves out, and come back.
"Does he have the stuff to spray now?" Coleman asks.
She shrugs. "It's getting time to go to the airport. Do you want me to do it?"
"I'll go," he says.
At the airport, he finds that Janine/Anya's arrival is delayed an hour. He waits at the gate. Perhaps some of the people gathered in the waiting area recognize him from the newspaper photographs. Perhaps they stare furtively, he can't be sure. He feels exposed, keeps to one side, beyond a bank of telephones, holding a magazine up. Flight Lines.
When her plane comes in at last, she's among the last ones out. He's surprised at how much weight she's gained. Her hair is a ma.s.s of crinkled curls as if she has just let it down from being braided, and she's dyed it bright red. She walks up to him, throws her arms around his neck, and hugs tight. "Dad," she says, stepping back from him. Then she turns slightly and with a gesture that looks like dismissal, says, "This here's Lucky Taylor."
"Lucky," he says, repeating it as if he's not certain he could've heard it right.
Standing at her side is a very small, thin, ragged-looking boy, with bad skin and a look of the street about him: holes in his jeans; a long tear in one sleeve of his s.h.i.+rt. His hair is unkempt and very long. The motion with which he pushes it back over his bony shoulders is decidedly feminine. "Hi," he says, offering a thin hand. There's something hangdog about him.
Coleman shakes it, glancing at his daughter, who gives him a look as if to say she means to explain. But no explanation comes. They go to the baggage carousel and wait for their bags, and Lucky chatters nervously, talking only to Coleman, about the turbulence they went through coming east. "It's the jet stream," he says. "It just buffets you."
"Lucky's supposed to spend a couple of days with us and then head on north."
Coleman clears his throat, and finds himself momentarily unable to say anything.
"I can always go on," Lucky says.
"No, we agreed."
"Well, actually, there is a little problem," says Coleman. "We've got a yellow jackets' nest in the spare room, Janine. You'll have to sleep on the sofa in the living room as it is."
She stares at him for a beat. "n.o.body told me this."
"I just discovered it today, hon."
"And it's Anya, now," she says. "Remember?"
"I'm sorry."
"I can sleep on the floor," says Lucky.
"You can sleep on the roof, too."
"I said I'd go on."
"Just cool it."
For a few seconds, they stand watching the bags come by on the belt. Lucky reaches for one, and then another. They go on waiting.
"Lucky and I met in a theater group in Santa Monica," Janine/Anya explains. "He's a future Broadway star." There's a note of sarcasm in her voice.
"Anya's very gifted, too," says Lucky, without any tone at all.
Coleman says, "Do you two want to tell me what's going on?"
"Nothing's going on," Janine/Anya says. "Is anything going on, Lucky?"
"Is Lucky your given name?" Coleman asks.
"No, sir."
They wait. Others step in, retrieve suitcases, and leave. The airport voices make their repeated p.r.o.nouncements about unattended luggage. Lucky lifts another bag, the largest yet, from the belt, and steps back.
"Lot of stuff," says Coleman, wondering where he'll put it all.
"Anya thinks we shouldn't mention your trouble," Lucky says abruptly over Janine's protesting repet.i.tion of his adopted name.
"Well," Coleman gets out.
"I'm sorry if this makes you uncomfortable."
"Lucky has to have his own way in everything," Janine/Anya says. "Don't you, Lucky?"
"I'm being honest, okay?"
"Lucky puts a premium on honesty, like a badge everybody absolutely has to wear."
The young man looks at Coleman and shrugs. "I'm sorry if this makes you uncomfortable."
"I'm a little uncomfortable," Coleman says.
"Try sitting in a plane for five hours with him," says Janine/Anya.
They put the baggage on two carts, and push it out into the parking lot. There's a problem about where it will all fit into the car. It's far more than will go into the trunk alone. The two young people keep a low, muttering argument going all the way, seeming more and more like squabbling children. Janine/Anya decides that the only way they can accomplish getting the car packed is if she sits on Lucky's lap. "It's not that far home," she says.
They have to take everything out and start over again twice, and finally they succeed, with Janine/Anya on Lucky's lap in the front seat. Lucky perched on a stack of duffel bags, and Janine/Anya holding a box of books. The only avenue of vision Coleman possesses is out the winds.h.i.+eld and to his immediate left. The pa.s.senger-side window is completely obscured by the box of books his daughter holds. He can't see Lucky's face for his daughter's bulk, and the box she holds, and anyway Lucky has to report for him what is out that window. They make very slow and halting progress out of the airport parking lot. The simple matter of cooperation has stopped the bickering for a time.
"So what's happening," Janine/Anya asks. "Any more news?"
"There's no change from the last time we talked," says Coleman.
"Well, they can't get away with it. You have to attack their character."
"Let's not talk about it now," Coleman says. "It's been pretty hard on your mother. Rudy's handling it, lining up people to testify for me and all that. It's just that the air is sort of poisoned by it." The weight of this comes down on him anew, and he has to work to keep himself from uttering the phrases of his outrage. It is fairly certain that he'll never be able to go back to his job.
He drives on into the brightness, the traffic on the highway south, with its s.h.i.+fting lanes and blinking arrows. There's a lot of traffic; it's stop-and-go all the way. He reads the personalized license plate on the panel truck in front of them: bad-a.r.s.e. He thinks of the bar he used to go to with the two women, the loud talk and the laughs-Deirdre had a fund of remembered personalized plates, funny ones from her travels, she said, though Linda accused her of getting them off the Internet.
And perhaps there is no such thing as a completely innocent time.
But he stirs in himself and his heart hammers in his chest. He experiences a wave of nausea, scarcely hearing the other two as they negotiate in the small s.p.a.ce for comfort, Janine/Anya s.h.i.+fting her weight and Lucky complaining that she's pinching the skin of his thighs. They come to a place where the traffic is at a standstill. bad-a.r.s.e is still in front of them. Lucky remarks about how odd it is to be stopped in the middle of a superhighway. No one answers. A moment later, he says, "My leg's going to sleep."
"You're such a whiner," Janine/Anya tells him.
"Can't you lift yourself a little?"
"Oh, for Christ's sake, Lucky. I'm not all that heavy."
"Tell my leg that."
Coleman grips the steering wheel. The traffic moves a little, and he swerves onto the shoulder of the road and heads to the exit, which is in sight up ahead.
"We're gonna get a ticket," Janine/Anya says in a singsong voice.
"Let the guy drive," Lucky says.
"Oh, shut up."
Coleman strives for a light tone: "Are you two gonna argue the whole time you're here?"
"My legs," says Lucky.
"Stop the car," Janine/Anya says. "This is ridiculous. I don't want to go another ten feet with him."
"That's fine with me," Lucky says.
"Look," says Coleman, feeling the blood rise to his face. "Both of you calm down, okay? I'm sure whatever it is you can settle it without acting like children."
They make the exit and he speeds a little, managing to beat the light at the first intersection. They are all quiet now, moving at a good clip.
Blue Collar, White Collar, No Collar Part 3
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Blue Collar, White Collar, No Collar Part 3 summary
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