The Lawgivers: Gabriel Part 15

Shead told herself she wouldnat allow her fear ever to prevent her from trying again if she saw them in danger. And they were in danger. She neither completely agreed or disagreed with their view of the situation. She wasnat blind or stupid. She could see that the udai, even those who were there to help, thought humans were beneath contempt. They didnat like humans, but they were still trying to do what they believed to be the right thing.

Shead had her own doubts before and she couldnat say that the att.i.tude of the social workers was something to endear them. She didnat even know if what the udai had apparently set out to accomplish would work, but she was convinced that they thought so, that this hadnat been conceived as a way to torture humans to death, even though it felt like it at times.

Much against their will, theyad been taught to make tools to work with to make more things. The tools were crude, even more primitive than the things theyad managed to make before using things theyad found in the rubble, but they worked. The temporary shelters theyad built when they first arrived hadnat been much if any better than the shanties theyad put together for shelter before, but the cabins theyad begun building were certainly an improvement. They were tight and dry even when it raineda"unless it rained really harda"and cool when the sun was hot and not freezing when the sun seta"because they could build fires inside to cook and to warm themselves and didnat have to deal with the choking smoke.

Lexa wasnat any happier about having to walk so far to get water or to relieve herself than anyone else but there was no getting around the fact that it was nice not having to watch your step and to smell dirt and growing things rather than s.h.i.+t and the stink of unwashed bodies packed too tightly together.

There was still plenty of that particular stench, unfortunately. Everyone worked hard from the crack of dawn until it was too dark to work anymore, and they sweated profusely, but more and more people were getting used to the idea of bathing.

She didnat know why it was that everyone was still so angry with the udai. They had to see that theyad kept their word, that things were getting bettera"very slowly, true, but noticeably. She was still hungry and thirsty most of the time, but she knew where she could get a drink of good water and she knew there was going to be something to eat at least once a day, even if the udai had to bring something ina"and they dida"begrudginglya"but they made sure there was enough food in the cook pots to feed everyone when they came up short in hunting and gathering. The food they were growing and the animals they were being taught to tend, according to the udai, would eventually make that unnecessary.

They said that in a tone of voice that made it clear that it d.a.m.ned well better come to that because they had no intention of continuing to feed them, but even the att.i.tude didnat change the facts.

She thought people just didnat want to credit the udai with helping. They didnat want to see any good in them at all because even though the udai were helping, it made them feel inferior to need help and they werenat about to admit that.

Most of them didnat, anyway. She thought there were some, like her, that thought not all of the udai were bad or to be hated, but they were afraid to speak up because they were outnumbered by the ones who despised them.

It still took a great deal of courage for Lexa to seek her brothers and sister out once shead made up her mind to try to reason with them. Even Kyle had seemed to say that he still loved her in spite of everythinga"that he disapproved of her, but he loved her enough to ignore it. He wasnat going to be any easier to convince than Maura or Will.

She still had to try. Fortunately, since Maura and Will seemed determined to remain elusive and aloof, Kyle came to her.

Shead just dropped into the coma she usually fell into at the end of a very long, very exhausting day when a light touch brought her awake. Sheer terror threatened to overcome her when a hand was clamped over her mouth.

aItas me, Kyle,a the figure holding her down said on a breath of sound. aI didnat want you to wake the others.a It seemed reasonable given the fact that she slept in a shelter with a half a dozen other women, but it took a few moments for the panic to subside even so. aWhat are you doing here?a she demanded when he finally released her. aYou scared the s.h.i.+t out of me!a aSorry. I wanted to talk a to give you something.a Lexa hesitated, but shead trusted Kyle before and although head scared the h.e.l.l out of her when head led her to Will, she didnat believe he meant her any harm. Nodding, she got up as quietly as she could and followed him out of the shelter.

When she was outside, she looked around for him and saw that he was heading toward the path to the stream. The guards rarely interfered with trips to get water, but she looked around to make sure none were watching her before she headed in the same direction. Kyle was waiting for her in the shadows as she stepped onto the path. aWhat is it?a she asked, somewhat uneasy in spite of her certainty that Kyle wouldnat hurt her. She wasnat convinced that Will wouldnat, not after the way head threatened her.

aItas a book.a Lexaas heart leapt. aA real book? I havenat seen one in years.a aMe neither,a Kyle said cheerfully. aMa a Willas friend gave it to him and he gave it to me after head read it.a Surprise flickered through Lexa. aHe read a whole book? I didnat think Iad managed to teach him to read. He hated it when he was little.a Kyle chuckled. aI didnat say it was easy, but then I never learned much neither.a aYou were really little when a.a Kyle ignored the reference to the raid. aYou said I was old enough.a aTo start learning,a Lexa reminded him, relieved that head dismissed that horrible experience so readily, but then he had been really little. Maybe he didnat remember it as well as she did? aWhat kind of book is it?a she asked curiously as she followed him along the path. aLike the one mama had?a aSort of, I guess. Itas not supposed to be a storybook, though. Willas friend said it was a history. Neither one of us knew what that was, but she said it was about things that happened before the day, about usa"our people, I mean.a Lexa searched her memories, but she couldnat recall anything either Sir or their mother had said about it. Not that Sir had seemed interested in teaching them anything but how to do the ch.o.r.es he wanted done. Head told stories about when he was a child, before. aaUa aSa?a Lexa asked when she abruptly recalled something Sir had said.

Kyle glanced at her and frowned. aDonat that spell us?a aYes, but a never mind,a she ended when she saw he was holding a very large, thick book. She settled on the bank with the heavy volume when Kyle gave it to her, trying to angle it so that the moonlight illuminated the pages. As bright as the moon was, though, it was a struggle to try to make out any of the words.

aCan you read it to me like you used to?a Lexaas throat closed as those memories of holding the baby head been instantly rose in her mind, but she forced a teasing smile. aYouare too big to get in my lap like you used to.a He looked a little offended and embarra.s.sed, but the comment surprised a chuckle out of him. aI just meant read. I tried, but I donat know the words.a Lexa hugged him impulsively. aI know. Iam sorry. I was just teasing.a He settled beside her, took the book and opened it, as if searching for something in particular. Finally, he pointed. aRead this. I didnat understand it when Will read it.a Lexa angled the book until enough light fell on the page head indicated to allow her to discern the words, frowning in concentration. aaIn Congress, July 4th, 1776, a declara"declaraa"Declaration by the repre-re-pre-sentatives of the United States of America.a Her heart began to thud hard with excitement. aI was right! I think. U.S. Sir said it was for United States!a Kyle shrugged. aWhat does it mean, though?a Lexa thought about it. aWell we both know what declare meansa"so they were saying that they declared something. I donat know what the rest of it means, but they wrote it down so it must have been really important.a Kyle looked disappointed. After a moment, Lexa continued. aaWhen, in the course of human events a.a aThe part about truth,a Kyle prompted.

aWe hold these truths to be self-evident a?a aYes. That part.a Irritation flickered through Lexa since she was still trying to understand the section shead started. It also occurred to her that Kyle was leading hera"not that he had had trouble understanding but that he wanted her to aseea something he had.

Since it was clear Kyle not only had heard it before, but many times, Lexa read the section in her head instead of out loud. She had to read it several times before the true meaning became clear because when she read the part about aall men are created equala she was immediately thrown since it was patently obvious all men werenata"and she was resentful that theyad considered only men equals. Why not women, too?

After shead read it again, though, and skimmed through some of the body of the doc.u.ment, she realized shead misunderstooda"just as Kyle, she supposed, had. aIt means people. All people are equala"not that some people arenat stronger than others or smarter. It says theyare all ent.i.tled to the pursuit of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.a She frowned. aThatas what Gabriel has been trying to say,a she said slowly.

aYes, the udai think they should have all that and we shouldnat,a Kyle said tightly. aAnd that says theyare no better than us!a Dismay flickered through Lexa. Shead suspected Kyle had something else in mind and obviously she was right. He thought this book would make her see that humans were better than the udai.

aOr worse,a Lexa pointed out. aTheyare people. But Gabriel was sent to make sure everybody had the same rightsa"not just the biggest and meanest. They arenat keeping us from being equal! Itas b.a.s.t.a.r.ds like King Ralph that have done that!a Before they could get any deeper into a debate, a hard thud nearby and then the telltale rustle of great wings made her heart perform a similar great thud in her chest and Lexa pulled away from Kyle to look around. At least she tried to. Kyle was on his feet in a matter of seconds and had pulled her up with him. She pushed against him to free herself, but he held her tightly, protectively. Before she could decide whether she needed to be protected or not, the intruder spoke.

aLet her go.a The voice was a low growl, but Lexa recognized it immediately and strained against Kyle again, struggling to turn her head enough to verify that it really was Gabriel. aItas ok, Kyley. Itas Gabriel.a aWhat is he doing here?a Kyle demanded in a cold voice that sounded like nothing shead heard from him beforea"sounded as dangerous and deadly as Will.

Confusion penetrated the dark rage that had engulfed Gah-re-al. aWho is he?a It sank in that there was more going on than Lexa had thought. aItas my little brother, Kyle,a she answered Gabriel. She looked up at Kyle worriedly. aItas Gabriel. Itas ok.a With notable reluctance, Kyle loosened his grip on Lexa. When he did, she pulled away from him and faced Gabriel, having recalled in the midst of her confusion that she and Gabriel hadnat parted on friendly terms when theyad last met at this very place. It almost felt like a replay of that awful scene and the fear struck her that it well could bea"or worse. aKyley brought me a gift.a Gah-re-al glanced from Lexa to the man standing just behind her, one hand still resting possessively on her shoulder. aIf this is nothing more than a visit between brother and sister, why slip away in the dead of night?a Anger over the unspoken accusation, indeed the possessiveness in the question and his att.i.tude, swept away Lexaas urge to try to placate. aBecause we arenat allowed to visit any other time!a she said angrily.

It took Gah-re-al aback, both her anger and the comment, but he couldnat argue that that wasnat true. Head seen the heavy hand the social workers used in running the camp. Some of his anger dissipated. He struggled with the sick feeling of jealousy in his gut and the twin urges to either flatten the man with his fist or leave. aOh,a he said a little lamely, knowing he should apologize for his a.s.sumption but still too suspicious to unbend that far.

He studied the man shead called Kyle for a long moment and finally extended his hand as the humans did. aIam Lexaas man, Gah-re-al.a

Chapter Eighteen.

It wouldave been hard to say who was jolted more by that announcement.

Gah-re-al hadnat known until it fell from his lips that he meant to say it, but as soon as he did he knew it was the sense of possessiveness head felt the moment he saw her with Kyle that had prompted it. He wouldnat have felt the jealousy or the possessiveness if he hadnat already considered that Lexa was his. His subconscious mind had already accepted. It was his conscious mind that needed the push of the threat of loss to verbalize what head already been thinking.

Lexa was so stunned that she couldnat think at all for many moments and when the flood gates did open she was so pelted with emotions and questions, doubt and hope, that she couldnat think of a response at all.

Kyle was possibly the most stunned of all. Head lured Lexa out to try to convince her that the lawgiver was merely using her, that she meant nothing to him and he would never acknowledge her. Even if he did enjoy f.u.c.king her, she would always be his dirty secret. If he cared for her, at all, as she believed, he would publicly acknowledge her as his womana"not join her only when they were away from prying eyes.

He hesitated for many moments, still mightily suspicious, and finally extended his own hand and grasped Gabrielas in a firm handshake. aShe didnat tell me that,a he said stiffly. aShe said you were a friend.a Gah-re-al looked at Lexa, trying to decide whether it was a good thing that she apparently considered him a friend or nota"or had at least claimed toa"definitely not if that was all she thought they were. And certainly not if shead claimed he was a friend because she hadnat wanted her family to think he was anything else. Happily unaware that she was too stunned to react at all, however, he was heartened by the fact that she hadnat flatly refuted his claim. If Kyle truly was her brother as she claimed, surely she would have rushed to deny it? Well if Kyle was anything else to hera"friend or lovera"he thought she would very quickly and emphatically have denied any such thing. aWe need to talk.a Lexa gaped at him. aAbout what?a That wasnat very promising! Gah-re-alas lips tightened. Discomfort wafted through him as he glanced at Kyle. He didnat want an audience, d.a.m.n it! She was usually so quick to grasp things he was abruptly suspicious that she didnat want to be alone with him. aThings,a he finally said a little lamely, a broad hint to send Kyle away that she either still didnat get or was unwilling to comply with. But then he was unwilling to elaborate when he suspected she was going to balk the minute she heard what head come to say, and he thought she might be harder to convince with her brother looking on.

Lexa glanced at Kyle when Gabriel did. She realized then that he wanted her to send Kyle away so that they had privacy and it instantly leapt to mind that he wanted to f.u.c.ka"maybe partly because she knew that was why head sought her out before and theyad been interrupted by the awful scene with Maura. She was instantly torn. Shead missed their intimacy, too. On the other hand she didnat want to risk driving a wedge between herself and Kyle as she had with Maura. aHeas my brother, Gabriel. I havenat seen him in so long and Iave hardly had the chance to talk to him since I found him.a She didnat want to talk to him. That was as plain as the nose on his face. Anguish suffused Gah-re-al that was so blinding he couldnat think of anything for several moments beyond the urge to disappear. It was only the recollection that his main objective in seeking her out that kept him firmly rooted to the spot, at least the only one head consciously acknowledged before head caught her with another man, was to remove her from the possibility of harm. Reluctance warred with the sense of insult and injury. He wrestled with himself for a few moments more and finally decided the most important thing was to see to Lexaas safety. They could sort the rest out later.

When they had some f.u.c.king privacy!

aYou arenat safe here,a he said bluntly and in a tone that dared her to argue with him. aIam going a.a He stopped. aI want to take you to a place where you will be safe until a well, until we can figure something else out.a Lexa felt her heart skip several beats. It instantly leapt to her mind that he knew about Will and she flicked a quick, guilty look at Kyle to see if he thought shead told Gabriel about what Will had said.

aWhy do you say that?a Kyle demanded.

Gah-re-al met Kyleas gaze steadily. aYou know d.a.m.ned well why she isnat. Our liaison is no secret. She was attacked before by village men. I canat be here to protect her.a Kyle flushed. aHer family is here. Weall protect her.a He was losing the war for possession, Gah-re-al realized abruptly. The anger that thought produced was enough to banish his doubts and conflicting emotions. aI am her family! Iam her man and she could be carrying my child! I have the right to protect her and my child the way I see fit! And I think sheall be safer somewhere else!a Lexa settled a hand on Gabrielas chest and one on Kyleas when it looked like they would come to blows. aI think you should go, Kyle. Donat be mad at me. Iall talk to you later.a aYou arenat going anywhere with him!a Kyle objected.

aThatas my decision.a Kyle stared at her for a long moment. aYouad choose him over your own family?a he growled angrily.

That hurt and made her afraid, but it also made her angry. aIf you love me, you wonat make me choose! No more than I would make you choose between me and your woman!a aI donat have a woman!a Kyle snapped.

Lexa rolled her eyes. aIf you had onea"when you do choose one!a Kyle was still angry, but less so. aI donat trust him. Heas a demon.a aI trust him.a aI hope you wonat regret it,a Kyle said angrily. Turning, he stalked off, disappearing into the shadows of the forest in a few moments.

Lexaas shoulders slumped. Gabriel was studying her somewhat warily when she finally turned to look at him again. Abruptly she felt both uncomfortable and shy. aWas that really why you came looking for me?a Gah-re-al looked at her blankly.

aBecause you thought I might be carrying your baby?a Lexa prompted.

aAre you?a Gah-re-al asked carefully.

Lexa wrestled with the urge to lie since it seemed to her that that was the most important issue to him. aNo, Iam not,a she said finally.

He frowned. aYou arenat just saying that because you donat want to go with me?a he finally asked suspiciously.

Lexa was mildly irritated but still hopeful. aNo. I said it because Iam not.a Gah-re-al felt abruptly deflated and lost, uncertain of how to make his argument when everything had hinged on her being pregnant. aWant to make one?a he asked a little lamely.

Lexa couldnat decide whether to be amused or punch him. aYou came to f.u.c.k,a she said bluntly.

Gah-re-al ground his teeth and sought patience. He moved closer, pulling her against his length. aI could be persuaded.a She did punch him that time, lightly on the chest because he had her arms pinned. aThatas what I get for thinking you were worried about me because you cared!a aI am worried and I do care. I just thought if that would convince you a.a aYou told me you couldnat take me as your woman.a aI wasnat thinking straight at the time.a aSooo a youare saying, now, that you do want me to be your woman?a aYou are my woman,a Gah-re-al countered.

She felt like punching him again. Instead, she merely released a long suffering sigh. aOk, Gabriel.a His arms tightened and then he pulled away to study her face. aI know you donat want to leave your siblings when youave just found them again, but a.a Gah-re-al stopped, wrestling with himself, wondering just how much he could trust Lexa. He thought he could trust her completely, but he couldnat share what might be vital military information, he realized, even so. It was against protocol to share that kind of information with any civilian. It could be construed as treachery against his government when that woman might well be on the enemiesa side. She would certainly be considered that if there was a wara"whether she actually was on her peopleas side or not.

He lifted a hand to caress her cheek. aI spoke with a friend. He has a homestead. He said I could take you there and you could keep his woman company. Youad be safer there than here until a Well, I guess until you decide if you want to be my woman.a Surprise flickered through Lexa. She smiled faintly. aI thought youad already decided.a He looked uncomfortable. aI have, but you have to decide, too. Otherwise Iall spend all my time trying to track you down,a he added with wry amus.e.m.e.nt.

Lexa was torn. She wanted to leap at his offer. Shead wanted to be his woman almost from the very first. It was a bitter pill to realize that she was going to have to choose between him and the little sister and brothers that had almost been more like her children than siblings.

aI love you, Gabriel. Nothing would give me more joy than to be your woman and have your children, but a I love them, too.a aIam not asking you to choose. Just a let me take you to a place where youall be safe. Thereas a The tension between your people and mine is dangerously high right now. Iam afraid that youare in more danger from your own people than mine. You know where they are now. When things are a more peaceful, Iall bring you back to visit them.a It was an unfortunate choice of words because it immediately reminded Lexa that there was liable to be war before anyone saw peace. She chewed her lip indecisively. aWhen did you want to take me?a she asked finally.

aTonight. Right now.a She looked up at him in dismay. aWithout even telling them bye?a Before Gah-re-al could think of a response, they were both distracted by a faint rustling sound. Kyle stepped out of the darkness. aGo with him, Lexa.a Anger flickered through Gah-re-al. aI might have known youad stay close enough to eavesdrop!a aYes. You shouldave. I never said I trusted you,a Kyle said coolly, but then dismissed him and focused on Lexa. aGo with him. I want you to be safe. Iall tell them.a aBut a.a Lexa stopped. aI wanted to talk to Will and Maura again. I need to, Kyle. I need to a make them understand.a aYou wonat change their minds. Let him take you someplace safe. Heas right. This is no place for you.a aThen it isnat a good place for you either!a Lexa snapped.

aItas where I need to be right now,a Kyle countered. aGo with him, Lexy. Stay safe. I want that for you. Iall be easier in my mind knowing you have a man to take care of you.a Surprise flickered through Gah-re-al, but then he realized something that hadnat occurred to him before. If there was a wara"and he thought from some of the things Kyle had said that Raphael hadnat been mistakena"he would find himself on one side and Lexaas siblings on the other. How much was she going to love him if she thought he might have killed one of them? If she thought there was even a chance that he might have?

Briefly a sense of guilt smote him, the thought that he owed allegiance to his own people, but he dismissed it with the reflection that he wouldnat be taking sidesa"either sidea"and one man wasnat going to make a difference either way if there was conflict. And he didnat know that there would be war even if he did suspect that it would come to that.

He knew, abruptly, what he was going to have to do if he and Lexa were to have any chance together. Nothing, he realized was worth risking losing Lexa. He had a chance, finally, to have a family and he wasnat going to throw that chance away.

aI wonat leave you long,a he said slowly. aI have to resign my post as lawgiver. It might take a few days to get through all the paperwork, but then Iall return for you and weall find a place to build our own homestead a if thatas what you want?a Lexa was still torn. Shead told herself that she wouldnat fail her siblings again, but as she stared unhappily at Kyle she realized that she had still been thinking of them as the little children shead left. They werenat children anymore and theyad made it clear that they controlled their own destinies, made their own decisions. They had already decided. She didnat know how theyad come to that place of hate, but she was a virtual stranger to them nowa"just as they were to her. They werenat going to listen to her as they had as children. They didnat trust her anymore. She wouldnat be throwing away a chance of happiness with Gabriel for them. Shead just be throwing it away for nothinga"and shead probably still lose thema"or not. It wasnat something in her power to change, though. And truthfully, she didnat think she could bear losing Gabriel when he was offering her what shead wanted for so long.

Guilt overshadowed the happiness Gabrielas offer had given her, but then shead learned in life lessons that happiness was usually leavened with a healthy dose of painful realitya"which made it something to be treasured. Only a fool would throw away such a rare and wonderful gift, selfish or not.

And she didnat have to give up on her brothers and sister. Gabriel had already said he would bring her to visit them. Maybe, in time, they would come around and she would still have a chance to have both Gabriel and her siblings, but she knew Kyle was right. Nothing she could say or do at this point was going to change anything. aYou wonat be a lawgiver anymore?a He smiled faintly. aI guess Iall be a farmer. d.a.m.ned if Iave got any idea how to do it, but Iall figure it out.a Lexa smiled at him. aWe will figure it out.a * * * *

Gah-re-al grimaced. aMy ears are ringing,a he muttered. aHealthy lungs, that one.a Lexa elbowed him in the ribs. aThey might hear you!a she hissed.

Gah-re-al uttered a disbelieving snort. aNot over the racket that little monster was making!a She sent him a disapproving look, unconsciously lifting her hand to the mound her belly had become. aI suppose youall think ours is a monster, too?a Gah-re-al gaped at her for a moment in dismay, not the least because it almost seemed like shead read his mind and knew he was worried about that very thinga"wondering if he was going to be able to handle having a squalling infant in the same housea"well, stay in the same house. He didnat doubt that if anybody was going it was going to be him. aI didnat say that.a aThey only cry when they need something,a she said. aIt isnat like they can tell you a any other way, I mean.a Gah-re-al nodded, but he didnat know a d.a.m.ned thing about it. aYou sure you want to walk to our place? Itas a long way.a aAnd youare worried about me.a He frowned. aI was just thinking it might be too much for you. I donat want you to drop it or anything.a aIam not even six months into my pregnancy! Iam not going to drop it along the way,a Lexa said a little indignantly. aThey donat just fall out! It takes a h.e.l.l of a lot of work to push them out.a Gah-re-al felt a little queasy. Head been trying d.a.m.ned hard not to think about that part. aI didnat mean it that way,a he said indignantly.

aWhat did you mean then?a He was d.a.m.ned if he knew!

Lexa glanced at his sullen expression a couple of times as they walked along the narrow trail that connected their homestead to Raphael and Claireas. aYou were thinking I might be too tired to f.u.c.k when we got there,a she said bluntly.

Gah-re-al felt his face redden. She was getting way too good at reading him and the h.e.l.l of it was he didnat know how she did it! aIt didnat cross my mind,a he muttered.

She laughed, but there was just a touch of a sarcastic edge to it. He nursed his feelings of ill usage for a few moments, but he knew if they were still at odds when they got back he wasnat getting any. He managed to curl his lips in a semblance of a smile. aReally. It didnat. But I could be persuaded.a Her laugh that time was more genuine. aSupper will be late.a aI can wait.a Lexa stopped abruptly and moved closer. Looping her arms around his neck, she grinned at him. aIam not sure I can. Iam starving. Youad better fly us there.a Gah-re-al wrestled with himself. aWe donat have to if you donat want to.a aHmmm. That depends.a aOn what?a he asked cautiously.

aAre we going to f.u.c.k? Or make love?a Gah-re-al stared at her a long moment, knowing getting what he wanted hinged on saying the right thing. Then again, he knew what the right thing was. aI always make love to you.a aSmart man!a Lexa said with a chuckle.

Gah-re-al studied her for a long moment and finally lifted a hand to caress her cheek. aI do love you, Lexa. You know that, donat you?a Lexa blushed with pleasure. aIall give you an hour to convince me.a aJust an hour?a he asked, laughing.

aOh youall be lucky to hold out that long!a aAh! A challenge! I love a good challenge.a The End.

Read an excerpt from Kaitlyn OaConnorsa latest book in her popular cyborg series, available soon through KK&M LLC and their distributors.

Cyberevolution: The Awakening By Kaitlyn OaConnor

Chapter One.

There was no question about the precise moment the drop s.h.i.+p entered the planetas atmosphere. The troop carrier began to s.h.i.+mmy. The vibrations increased exponentially as they dropped lower until it reached a point where it felt like it would liquefy flesh, bones, and teeth, and everything around them would disintegrate. Then the transport began to buck wildly. Abruptly, an explosion ripped a hole in the hull wide enough to suck three troopers and their seats out of it.

Something strange happened when it did. Seth felt his motor functions slow in a most peculiar way. Logically, he knew that the hull breach, the flying shrapnel that peppered every troop close enough to catch a projectile, the screams, the flying bits of flesh and metal that resulted from the impact of the projectiles, and the abrupt extraction of one entire row of seats and their occupants created by the opposing forces of interior pressure and exterior occurred almost simultaneously. He also knew that his processor was fast enough to record all of those nearly instantaneous occurrences.

Time seemed to slow, however. He blinked, heard a strange roaring sound that did not seem to be related to the hull breacha"because it occurred milliseconds prior to thata"and then he saw everything that happened in a series of stills. As if he was experiencing a complete system failure due to faulty, failing power supply, he saw the hole simply appear, the darkness beyond as profound as deep s.p.a.ce although he knew it was simply the dark side of the world below them. He saw the stunned expressions on the faces of the three troops that were sucked out as they flew backwards in their safety harnesses and vanished in the black abyss.

Panning right, he saw the troops who had been seated beside them turn their heads very slowly toward the hole and the strange, disjointed dance several others performed as holes appeared in their bodies and chunks of flesh, blood, and pieces of metal slowly jetted from them.

It was more than a slowing of his visual perception, however. He could not seem to process what he had recorded. He felt oddly blank which became even more strange when he realized he had not simply shut down.

This was a very strange system failure indeed.

Particularly when he felt a rush of something completely incomprehensible fill the odd void.

Abruptly, his heart rate shot upward and he felt his body tingle with cold as if an electric current had sizzled along his exterior, penetrating all the way to his biological organs nestled in the armor of his cha.s.sis. And then time, his motor functions, seemed to abruptly right themselves and everything was happening simultaneously around him, too quickly to process.

He strained against his safety harness to twist his head around enough to a.s.sess his team leader, Danika. She was staring at the hole, her blue eyes wide, her face as pale as death, her lips parted slightly. The frozen look on her face sent a shaft of a something through Seth, making his heart jar in his chest, as if it had lost its rhythm.

aDanika! Are you alright? Were you hit?a She sent him a startled look, which sent another inexplicable tide of something unidentifiable twisting through Seth. She had not ceased to functiona"was not dead, he corrected himself.

She blinked a couple of times and then looked down at herself as if she could not a.s.sess her condition without a visuala"and her hands. She patted her torso and then looked at him again. aDamage report,a she demanded abruptly.

It was at that point that it occurred to Seth that he had not executed a damage report despite the fact that he had noted that his systems were performing in a very erratic way. He frowned and looked down at himself as she had. When he looked at her again, he saw that she was looking at him strangely. He felt the temperature of the flesh of his face heat inexplicably and a strange flutter in his belly, as if he had swallowed something alive that was still moving. aAll systems fully operational. No damage.a She studied him several moments more and Seth felt a fluctuation of heat and cold that seemed to be a reaction to her close scrutiny. Finally, she dismissed him and flicked a glance at the other two squad members. aDanea"Nilesa"damage report.a aAll systems fully functional. Minor anterior damage to torso,a Niles responded. aThe shrapnel did not penetrate beyond biological sheathing. Nanos performing repair. Estimated repair time a one hour to complete.a aMobility impaired,a Dane replied. aExtensive damage to pneumatic knee joint. Nanos affecting repairs. Estimated repair time six hours. Minor damage to biological sheathing in three locationsa"right knee, right calf, right arma"estimated repair time 45 minutes, 13 seconds.a af.u.c.k!a Danika exclaimed. aPatch the suits! Weare on the dark side and looking at well below zero temperatures. Can you make the jump, Niles?a aAffirmativea"disregarding more damage prior to reaching the jump alt.i.tude.a Since several more missiles had exploded in close proximity to the drop s.h.i.+p during the course of the systems checks, Seth thought the probability of more damage was high. He considered pointing that out until it occurred to him that Danika hadnat requested the information. That realization sent him into even more confusion. Unable to dismiss the suspicion that he had sustained some sort of damage, he ran another systems check. Again, his systems report was negative. Unconvinced despite that, he lifted one hand and examined his head, wondering if a microscopic fragment had penetrated his skull and damaged his CPU.

His squad leader noticed the movement and the examination. aIs there a problem, Seth?a The odd fluctuation of hot and cold flooded him again. aNegative.a The realization that he had just lied struck Seth forcefully. He had informed his squad leader that he was fully functional and could detect no damage when in fact he suspected that his entire system was malfunctioning.

He was no longer recording internal and external events, he realized after considering the problem for some moments. He was a feeling.

That discovery a unnerved him. He could not think of another way to describe the strange hot/cold fluctuation, the tightening sensation in his gut, or the erratic rhythm of his heart. He dismissed that possibility and examined the events he had noted since the drop and determined that he could track the anomaly back to the precise instant the exploding missile had ruptured the hull of their drop s.h.i.+pa"or rather an instant prior to that. There had been a roaring sound, like the rush of air, almost as if he had antic.i.p.ated the rupture of the hull.

He had not heard the sound with his ears, though. It had been inside his braina"the biological parta"not the CPU.

Anger swept through hima"not the perception of an event that might cause anger or the reaction he had been programmed to exhibit upon such an occurrence. He felt it.

The biological brain he had been given was defective!

aBail out! Bail! Bail! Bail!a the co-pilot, a human, abruptly roared over the com-unit.

Niles and even Dane had thrown off their safety harnesses and were on their feet before the human had issued the order the second time. Brought abruptly from his internal examination, Seth was still a few seconds behind them due his preoccupation.

Danika, he discovered, was still trying to free herself from her safety harness. He reached down, pushed her hands aside, and depressed the lock release. She flicked a look of surprise at him and then glared. Shoving his hands away, she tossed the harness off and stood with an effort.