Loose Ends Part 3

"Come here, baby." He reached for me again.

Again, I pulled back just in time.

"You didn't want me the other night, remember? So you've got to prove you want me now."

"Believe me, I want you, baby. Look, my jimmy wants you so bad that he's saluting you." He pulled me onto the sofa and began to suckle and caress my b.r.e.a.s.t.s again, moving his hand up and down between my thighs.

"No, show me, Brice."

Brice knew what I was talking about. He rarely went down on me, but it turned me on so much when he did that I thought I was losing my mind. He had me sucking his d.i.c.k all the time, though. When we first married, Brice made me watch these p.o.r.no movies so that I could get the technique down. And Brice is huge. Sometimes he wouldn't give me any unless I did that for him. Now the tables were turned.

Brice realized I was serious. When he walked away into the kitchen, I wasn't sure what he was up to. He quickly returned with one of our dining room chairs and placed me gently in it as he continued to caress me. Brice proceeded to pull me to the edge of the seat, pulled my negligee up to my waist and grabbed my ankles, placing them on the chair rests.

My stuff was literally in his face. He got on his knees and opened my legs even wider, if that was possible. He was definitely up close and personal. As he lowered his mouth and began to grant my request, I threw my head back in ecstasy.

Mia.

"Mommy, Mommy, look," Lyric shouted as she ran back and forth on her short, stubby legs from Mama to me. We were at Northlake Mall, off Lavista Road, relaxing on a bench after an exhausting shopping spree. Mama, Lyric, and myself were now indulging in Baskin-Robbins ice cream. It was b.u.t.ter pecan for me, strawberry for Lyric, and rocky road for Mama. It had been a full day helping Mama shop for a Carnival cruise she was going on in a few weeks. Her first one.

She's come a long way. Years earlier she would have never even thought about going on a senior citizens' cruise to the Bahamas. A few years ago a liquor bottle was her best friend and companion. However, that's all in the past. Mama has been sober for almost five years and still attends AA meetings regularly. It hasn't been an easy road, not by a long shot. But she's doing just fine. Now her life is full of good friends, bingo, church and her only granddaughter.

Lyric was getting more ice cream on Mama than in her own little mouth.

"The other day when Christian picked up Lyric, he told me that y'all are going to meet with that fool," Mama said as she smiled at Lyric, who was now back on the floor walking back and forth.

"Yes, Mama, we haven't set a time or place yet, but we are meeting with him and his new wife. I think her name is Kree. It'll make Christian happy, and that's what's important to me. Even though he won't admit it, I know he has missed having Brice in his life. After everything that's happened, Christian lost the most-his adopted family."

"I think you're doing the right thing for your husband and even yourself. You need this closure. You look Brice straight in the eyes and you let him know that he didn't destroy your spirit. You be careful, though, baby. I still don't trust that man as far as I can throw him. Any man who would hit a woman . . . Lord have mercy. After all that mess he put you through . . ."

"I know; I will. Like I said, I'm doing this for Christian. If I had my way, I'd never set eyes on the man again."

"Why now, though, why after almost five years? That's what I can't figure out. It doesn't make sense," Mama wondered.

"I know; I've thought about that too. But he's been overseas most of this time, and it couldn't possibly be because his conscience is bothering him." Lyric jumped back into my lap, hugged me, and gave me a sticky kiss on the nose.

"His wife, poor thing, what does she think about this li'l meeting?"

"Honestly, I don't know, Mama, and I really don't care," I huffed with too much att.i.tude, which caused Mama to give me one of her looks. One of her "do you know who you're talking to?" looks.

As she gazed into s.p.a.ce she said, "I don't ever want to see you in that state of mind again. During that period, you were in such emotional despair. A parent can't stand seeing her child in pain. That man totally broke my baby's spirit . . ."

"Let's talk about something else. I'm sick of hearing about Brice. We're giving him too much importance, too much power," I said in a shaky voice.

Mama looked at me out of the corner of her eyes. "Okay, baby. Be careful. Just be careful. I don't want to see you hurt again. You've got a good man in Christian. Men like Christian don't come around every day."

Mama and I, along with Lyric in her Mickey Mouse stroller, went to a few more stores and eventually called it a day around four o'clock.

On the drive home I thought about what Mama had said. I was a sad, pitiful case during my divorce to Brice. My heart was split wide-open. Most days, I couldn't even get out of bed. I just wanted to sleep. I felt like my life was over. I had my good and bad days, but Mama was there through it all. I promised myself I'd never give a man that much power in my life again-as much as I love Christian, not even him. No, I don't want to see myself in that state again.

Christian.

"Is that cool with you, baby? Let me know if it's not, because we can change the time," I asked Mia for probably the third time that day.

"Christian, like I told you before, that's fine with me. I'll double-check and make sure Mama can babysit Lyric," Mia a.s.sured me as she s.e.xily sashayed into the kitchen to finish up the dinner dishes. I admired her from the kitchen table. It was another lazy Sunday afternoon and tomorrow was business as usual, back to the work routine. Mia's lucky; she has a few more months and then she'll be out for summer break. Schoolteachers have it made in that area. After a school year with some of those kids, they need a break. Mia has tons of stories to tell about some of their bada.s.ses.

We had finally come up with a date, two weeks from Sat.u.r.day, to meet with Brice and Kree. To make it convenient for Mia, we decided to have a light meal at our house and take it from there. Surprisingly, Mia is taking everything in stride. She was truly amazing. I know she's doing all this for me. I realize I'm probably being selfish, but I miss our true friends.h.i.+p, the ties of brotherhood that Brice and I had once shared. I was hoping, on some level, that we could move forward and recapture that. Yes, I'm being selfish.

As I heard Mia humming away in the kitchen, clinking dishes now and then, I thought back to how we got together. After Mia's breakup with Brice, I was as emotionally devastated as she was. Mia had lost a husband, but after admitting to Brice that I was in love with Mia, I had lost a lifelong best friend. In giving up our friends.h.i.+p, I also gave up any ties to Brice's family. That was entirely my choice.

In the beginning, his moms, Vivica, was constantly calling to see how I was doing. She'd chitchat about whatever was going on in her life. When I wasn't very receptive, her calls eventually dwindled down to one or two a month and then to nonexistent. Afterward, I was pretty much alone in life. That suited me fine, because most of my life had been spent alone-emotionally anyway.

My brother, Randy, was killed as a teenager. He never lived to see eighteen. My moms had died when I was in high school and I never knew my pops. Since I had never formed too many attachments or friends.h.i.+ps, I was literally all alone. Looking back, if I had to do it all over again, I'd still make the same decision. I had to choose and I chose Mia.

After Mia and Brice's breakup, she left North Carolina and returned home to Georgia and to her moms. I soon got into the routine of calling her once a week, usually on Sundays, just to check up on her. Mia was in so much pain. Most of the time she was just lying around or in bed. She didn't go anywhere, didn't see anyone, never left the house except for work. I used to tell her that she made the start of my work-week bearable because I could focus on making it through the week so that I could talk to her on Sunday. Mia just laughed at that, which was something she didn't do a lot of, and told me I was so silly. Her laughter was music to my ears.

Eventually the phone calls turned into short weekend visits and, in between, there were "just because" cards, e-mails and letters mailed to each other. My visits were always platonic, because even though Mia was divorced by then, it seemed that an invisible Brice was always with us. An ever-seeing force. Mia never brought up his name or mentioned anything about her life with him, but he was always there with us. An unseen presence.

I felt guilty that I had fallen in love with her. Now, I know that we can't help whom we love. The heart can't lie. The heart won't lie. Every time I felt a gush of love for Mia, I felt like I betrayed Brice. Sure, he was possessive, hot-tempered, jealous and always beating on her when they were married. Mia had made the right decision by leaving him, yet I felt like I was being disloyal.

So . . . I denied my feelings and kept everything platonic. I wasn't dating anyone, and it was hard being close to Mia without being able to act on my feelings, but at least she was in my presence and in my life. That brought me great joy. A hug from her, a kiss on the cheek, her laughter-it brought me joy.

Mia was slowly returning to her old self, the one I fell in love with. Usually a flirt, she kept her emotional distance from me as well. Yet occasionally I'd see glimpses of her previous spirit. What finally changed our entire relations.h.i.+p was a wedding and a snowstorm in Virginia. To this day, that state has a soft spot in my heart.

Mia asked me to ride with her to her cousin Linda's wedding in Baltimore one cold weekend. I agreed, Mia met me in North Carolina and off we drove on our merry way. The wedding was beautiful as far as weddings go, and Linda made a gorgeous bride. According to Mia, she had finally snagged that pilot she had her eyes on all those years. I remembered meeting Linda years back. She was cool people.

Mia was simply stunning in a black dress that showed off her curves. During the ceremony, now and then, Mia would glance over at me sitting to her right. I loved it when she'd lean over and touch the back of my neck to whisper something in my ear. Just her touch was magical. I could feel a change taking place. Barriers were falling down, chip by chip. Throughout the ceremony, Mia would sneak a peek at me when she thought I wasn't looking. A few times our eyes met and she gave her dazzling smile, just for me. By the end of the ceremony we were holding hands with our fingers firmly entwined. It felt right for the first time.

After an elaborate reception with a live band and sit-down dinner, we changed into jeans at Linda's apartment and decided to drive back home through the night and early-morning hours. Mia and I didn't count on a snowstorm. Unfortunately, we hadn't paid much attention to weather reports that evening. Mia and I had just about made it to the Virginia border when visibility became almost nil and, to top that off, we were both tired from the day's events.

When it looked like it was going to be too dangerous to continue, we stopped at motel after hotel looking for a vacancy. However, everyone else on the road had had the same idea. There weren't any vacancies anywhere.

Finally, luck was on our side, and we secured the last room at a Holiday Inn spin-off. Since there was only one room available, we had to share. It was a decent room with two full-size beds. At least we were warm and had a roof over our heads. The news reported that the storm was far-reaching and had surprised and stranded a lot of motorists.

Once Mia and I were settled we took our individual showers and got ready to retire for the night. I noticed Mia hadn't said too much since our arrival, but I a.s.sumed she was just tired. Now and again I caught her staring at me. Earlier, when I had stepped out of the hot shower, I realized I had forgotten to bring my T-s.h.i.+rt into the bathroom. So I wrapped one of the white hotel towels around my waist. It was no big deal; Mia was a grown woman and had seen a man's chest before. However, when I walked out to retrieve my s.h.i.+rt out of my black travel bag, Mia couldn't answer a simple question. She couldn't even look at me and kept her head down.

Later, when she was taking her shower, I reclined back on one of the beds, watched TV, and imagined Mia showering, lathering sudsy soap over her body, and daydreamed about being with her. Mia finished up, came out dressed in a long T-s.h.i.+rt thingy, smiled at me, said good night and hopped into the full-size bed next to mine.

I fell asleep with visions of her ample b.r.e.a.s.t.s, which I had seen through her thin T-s.h.i.+rt. Later that night I awoke to someone calling out my name, softly at first and then more urgently. I rubbed sleep from my eyes and tried to focus in the darkness. It was pitch-black in the room and I couldn't see a thing. When I finally focused, Mia was standing above my bed without a st.i.tch of clothing on. She was looking down at me. I shook my head and focused because I thought I was imagining things or having an erotic dream.

When Mia called out my name again, I didn't say a word. I pulled the covers back and she got in and sought my mouth. It was a sweet kiss as our tongues met and explored the mystery of each other. We had waited too long for this moment. The kiss went on for a few minutes until Mia pulled away.

"Christian, show me all the love I feel from you," she cooed as my lips touched her neck, making her s.h.i.+ver.

My hands began an exploration of her body, inch by precious inch. I asked, "Are you sure? There's no turning back once we do this."

She nodded her head and smiled. "I've never been surer of anything in my life."

It was on, to put it mildly! We loved each other like two people starving for a simple touch. I felt, kneaded, rubbed, caressed and tasted her entire body from head to toe. When Mia slowly eased her sweetness onto my throbbing manhood, we meshed as one, and she started our ride so slowly, so sensually, that I thought I had died and gone to heaven. We were like a rocket s.h.i.+p. As the acceleration picked up, with me guiding her hips and rising to meet her with my own, her pace increased. Her back was arched, head thrown back, eyes glazed over, b.r.e.a.s.t.s bouncing, and we continued our dance. I was hard as a steel pipe, almost exploding, pulling back, squeezing, moving in and out. I was reaching for her nipples, moaning, Mia sucked my fingers one by one into her warm mouth.

Frantic breathing, couldn't catch my breath. Calling out her name over and over, praising her loveliness, adoring her body, wors.h.i.+ping her power, loving her, giving all I had to give . . . Then one last thrust . . . I remember rolling over on top of her as she instinctively wrapped her legs around my back, and then flying to the top of the rocket s.h.i.+p with her name on my lips, my eyes rolling back in my head. Miaaaaaaaaaa.

Mia and I stayed up the rest of the night talking, really talking. Wrapped in each other's arms, for the first time we shared our true feelings for each other, and Brice's presence wasn't in the room with us. We felt as one, and before we left for home we were one again. This time, it was slow and gentle. Eye-to-eye. Spiritual.

After that, Mia consumed my life every waking hour, and, shortly afterward, we recited our wedding vows to each other in an intimate ceremony. We wrote our own vows to each other, promising to faithfully love, forever cherish and always honor each other, through good and bad times, to be there for each other through sickness and health, until the day we die. And in over three and a half years, I haven't regretted a second of making those vows. Not a second.

Brice.

"Christian, man, thank you for giving me this opportunity to redeem myself. Believe it or not, I do have a conscience," I said to Christian, who had called me on my cell phone to confirm our get-together next Sat.u.r.day evening at eight.

"Not a problem; I think we all need to resolve some unfinished issues," Christian declared with much sincerity in his voice. "Brice, I hope this is all for the best. For everyone concerned. Do me a favor-if it looks like the evening isn't going well, leave. I'm not going to force this on Mia."

"It's done, man. I've still got your back, regardless of the differences we've faced these last few years."

"Cool, Brice. You're still my dog."

"Should we bring anything?"

"Just yourselves. We've got it covered like a blanket. Man, I hope this isn't a mistake."

"It's not; trust me."

Christian and I talked awhile longer about Moms and my pops. Pops's health had deteriorated little by little over the last five years. His doctor diagnosed him with the initial stages of Alzheimer's. It's truly sad to see a man who was once so strong, vibrant and unstoppable reduced to the sh.e.l.l of a person I see each time Kree and I stop by to visit. Year by year, he's losing his memory and his ability to take care of himself. Moms is dealing with it, though, but of course she would-that's Moms. Regardless of everything Pops has put her through, she loves him dearly. I truly believe that, because Pops has taken Moms through some heavy s.h.i.+t.

I'm relieved to be back in the area, because I can take some of the daily stress off of her. I don't want Moms to become a prisoner in her own home. She had been that when I was a child. Back then, Pops didn't play. His word was the law in our household. And you best believe he ruled with an iron fist. Unfortunately, Moms was usually on the receiving end.

Christian and I finally said our good-byes and I hung up as tons of memories flooded me. I thought back to the relations.h.i.+p he and I had shared in the past. The man was once like a blood brother to me. We were close, to say the least. At school, they used to call us the Two Musketeers.

h.e.l.l, Christian and I grew up together. We even got our first taste of some a.s.s from the same hoochie, all within the same week. What was her name . . . ? I can't even remember now. She'd dropped her drawers for practically every male at the school. Christian and I have been through so much together-both good and bad. I only hope we can recapture what we once shared-a true friends.h.i.+p. I miss that. I didn't realize how much until recently.

The ringing of my cell phone brought me out of my reverie and back to reality. I slowly drove down Auburn Avenue, watching my African American brothers and sisters as they tended to their daily lives. That's what I love about Atlanta; it's the mecca of black America. There is black history everywhere. If you can't make it here, then you can't make it anywhere.

"h.e.l.lo?"

"Mr. Matthew?"

"Yes, this is he," I answered, trying to place the voice on the other end of the line. It was a young-sounding male who sounded familiar.

"Mr. Matthew, this is Mr. Petty, over at National Bank. I wanted to be the first to congratulate you. Your loan has been approved."

I didn't hear his next comments because I was too busy thinking about my next steps. How long would it take me to be up and operational? How many employees would I need to hire?

"Mr. Matthew? Are you still there?"

"Yes, my cell went out of range for a few seconds. I'm here. Please go on."

"Well, all we need now is your signature on the dotted line. What is a convenient time for you to come in?"

"I can be there first thing in the morning." I tried to contain my growing excitement. "How about ten o'clock?"

"Ten o'clock it is. We'll see you then. Again, congratulations and welcome to the National Bank family."

"Thank you." I hung up, still in awe.

As I stopped at the traffic light, I couldn't believe how great my day had been going. Life was definitely looking up. First the news from Christian; then the loan went through, and I even had a few possible locations for my office s.p.a.ce. I'd been scouting out prime locations. Three looked promising, and the overhead wouldn't be too steep.

The light changed from red to green and I slowly pulled off and picked up my cell to call home. The phone rang three times and Kree picked up.

"h.e.l.lo?"

"Hey, baby. I've got great news!" I shouted right off the bat.

"You got the loan?" Kree asked with mounting excitement in her tone.

"Yeah, the loan officer just called. After I sign the papers, it's a done deal, baby. After ten o'clock tomorrow morning, I'll be an entrepreneur."

"I'm so proud of you, baby. I knew you could do it. Your proposal was so well written, and there's a definite need for your services." Kree spoke with obvious pride in her voice.

"Thanks, baby. Listen, get dressed in that s.e.xy red dress I love to see you in, and I'm taking you out to Justin's for a celebratory dinner. I'll be there in fifteen."

Kree had been talking about going to Justin's for two months. Up until now we couldn't afford to splurge. But tonight we were going to live it up and celebrate the start of a new venture.

Once I arrived home, I showered and dressed in record time. I dressed from head to toe in black, looking good and feeling fine.

Kree was stunning in her s.e.xy red dress with the plunging neck-line. I admired her for a few seconds. Stunning. She adorned it with a pair of slinky, strap-on red shoes and a simple pair of diamond-stud earrings that I'd given her for her birthday last year. Kree was beautiful, breathtaking. She has a way of looking at me, batting her long eyelashes, pouting her full lips a certain way, that made me weak at the knees. She knows how to turn me on, and I know how to turn her out.

I splashed on a little of my favorite cologne, checked out my hair one last time and headed out the door hand in hand with my lady.

On the ride over, Kree talked nonstop about what a great businessman I would make, how successful I was going to be and how proud she was of me. I must admit, Kree has always been supportive of my endeavors. She's a good wife and loves to please and take care of her man. She's mature for her age. I guess that comes from traveling abroad and being exposed to other cultures at such an early age. Sometimes I forget she's only twenty-five.

After we left our car with the valet to be parked, Kree and I made our way to the entrance of Justin's. The wait for a table wasn't as long as I expected, but there was a huge after-hours crowd at the bar laughing and having a good time. The atmosphere was trendy, and the crowd consisted mostly of black professionals out for an enjoyable evening. There were many attractive black women in the place. It was amazing how many of them tried to make eye contact with me even with Kree on my arm.

After a twenty-minute wait, Kree and I were seated at an intimate corner table. She kept smiling at me, showing me her pearly whites. I leaned over, cupped her face and gave her a kiss that lasted for a few seconds.

She leaned over to wipe the red lipstick off of me. "What was that for?"

"Oh, I can't kiss my wife now?" I asked in mock indignation.

"Anytime, anywhere, anyplace. You aren't usually so affectionate in public, that's all."

"Well, you look so beautiful and s.e.xy tonight that I can't keep my hands off of you. Later, I can't wait to show you how beautiful you are."