Starkissed. Part 24

Cameron steered around the counter and joined them. "Your mother needs a few hours away from me. Drew agreed to join us or your mother wouldn't go."

"Well, what am I, chopped paow steak? Not that I mind Drew having lunch with us, but I'l be with you."

"We thought you might have some things to do this afternoon, too," Cameron said. "I shut down the console. Since Tasha isn't here, we'l just close the office for the afternoon."

"No, we won't. I don't have anything else to do so I'l come back here."

"Well, darling, you never know what might pop up," Catherine said. "Now, are we all ready?"

Leith meekly followed along as they shut the office and left the building. Drew drove them to a restaurant not far away, and they enjoyed a leisurely lunch. Every time Leith tried to ask questions, either her father or mother turned the conversation in another direction. Finally, she gave up. They would tell her in their own time.

At last, Catherine got up and kissed Leith's cheek. Leith watched the gentle kiss and subtle touches her parents shared before her mother left. It was difficult to believe they had been married for almost twenty-five years. They acted like newlyweds. It was the kind of relations.h.i.+p Leith always wanted and probably the main reason she had never taken casual lovers. She wanted a deep, lasting relations.h.i.+p like her parents had.

What she yearned for with J'Qhir.

Tears burned her eyes as she looked at her father. "Is there something you haven't told me about your condition? Is that what this is all about?"

"Of course not, Leith," he said, but he sounded tired. "We haven't been keeping anything from you about my condition. Besides, your mother wouldn't have left if there was anything to tell you."

Leith nodded. "All right, then. Are you ready to go home, Dad? You've done quite a bit for your first day out."

"I'm fine. Actually, I was thinking of a walk in the park, if you two don't mind."

"What about Mom?"

"She'l meet us there later."

Leith sat quietly in the vehicle while Drew drove them to the park, found a parking s.p.a.ce, and helped Cameron out. Beads of perspiration broke out on her skin immediately. In late July, in the mid-south, the heat and humidity was almost unbearable. By the time they entered the park, she felt as if she were wrapped in a layer of damp cloth.

"Are you sure you're up to this?" Leith asked. "We can do this another time, when the humidity isn't as high. The air's no cooler beneath the trees."

"I'm fine."

Leith glanced around the park, wondering what this was all about. Very few beings were out and about in this heat. A group of young Peridots crawled over the play area. Two Hykaisites performed battle exercises to a small group of interested humans. A few others walked here and there under the shade of the huge, sprawling trees.

Leith stopped when she saw the robed being standing a dozen meters away. His long, dark gray robe had blended so well within the shadows she had missed him the first time her gaze swept the park. Her heart thudded erratically. J'Qhir.

She glanced down at her father.

Cameron smiled. "It's up to you whether you want to see him or not."

She looked at J'Qhir again and said stupidly, "I already see him. Why didn't you tell me?"

Cameron cleared his throat. "J'Qhir explained that this is the way it's done, according to custom. I saw nothing wrong with it as long as he understood that if you turned around and walked away, then no one would stop you. It's up to you."

"Why couldn't Mom be here?"

"According to their custom, only male family members are allowed and the meeting place must be neutral ground. I told him Drew was like a member of the family and he agreed."

"And the purpose? I can't believe everyone went to all this trouble just for him to say h.e.l.lo."

"That's for you and J'Qhir to discuss."

Cameron would say no more.

It was what she had dreamed of, J'Qhir coming to her. She took one step then another and as she approached him, he turned away from her and moved deeper into the trees. She noticed he still walked with a limp.

She drew in a deep breath and followed along behind.

J'Qhir was all too aware of Leith's delicate stride behind him. When he first saw her as she entered the park, he could barely restrain himself from rus.h.i.+ng to her and embarra.s.sing himself into self-imposed exile. He wanted to hold her and kiss her there and there and there, carry her away to lovemake with her until their bodies ached sweetly with the spending of their pa.s.sion, as Leith called it.

Pa.s.sion, a wondrous Terran word. The Zi equivalent did not lend itself to such a meaning. He was pa.s.sionate in his desire to save Zi, but he was also pa.s.sionate in his desire for Leith. The two feelings were distinctly different. The Zi word did not extend to the intense physical need and longing he had for Leith.

The pattern of her walk was different, as if her center of balance had been altered. Did she reel with emotion at seeing him again? And which emotion? Excitement or displeasure? Each could cause the same response. She had not smiled when she found him beneath the tree. She had not appeared angry, but she had not seemed happy either. He knew well her happiness from their time on Paradise.

He had wandered through the park earlier and learned the many paths. Cameron had explained few others would be about because of the heat. The air here was damper than that of Zi, but he was quite comfortable even with the formal robe. Today, he was not the Warrior and gladly left his war attire behind.

Leith's steps quickened and she drew nearer. "J'Qhir..."

He stopped at the sound of her voice, as he should. For him, the bonding ritual had begun.

"Do you have to walk so fast? I can barely keep up." She glanced around the dense foliage. "Where are we going?"

"We are there," he said without turning to her.

She was silent a moment, not comprehending then discarding as unimportant. "J'Qhir, it's good to see you again. I tried to get in touch with you, but I was told you had left Zi."

Something swelled within his chest.

"I don't know what my parents have told you-"

"Cameron ha.s.ss told me all that I need to know. We have been communicating sssince my return to Zi."

"Oh."

Did he detect disappointment in that one small sound? Why should contact with her father disturb her? Of course, she didn't completely understand the bonding ritual. Perhaps he should have allowed Cameron to explain the process, but he wanted her reaction-good, bad, or indifferent-to be uncontrolled by forethought. It was critical to his peace of mind that she answer spontaneously.

Even so, he must diverge from the proper script. The demands the Council arbitrarily placed upon his position changed the procedure.

"The Council-" he began then cleared his throat. "The Council ha.s.ss decreed the Warrior mussst be bound. They have chosssen a lifemate for me."

Leith made a very small, strangled sound-he barely heard it-but when he turned, her face was as non-committal as before.

"I told them I would not bind with one they chossse. I would choossse my own."

"And...have you?"

"Yesss. If ssshe will agree."

"She would be a fool not to." Liquid shone in her eyes, but she quickly blinked it away.

"Nhi'a'aqh'fi johl meh' pohlas'h," he said in Zi. I will build a lair for us. He stopped and inhaled, in preparation of repeating the words in Terran Standard.

"Ehl, whaz ghajh dhi'i'i nhehw." Leith shocked him by responding in Zi. Yes, that would be most proper. Her voice shook as she carefully enunciated the unfamiliar words, and this time liquid filled her eyes and overflowed.

"Leith...do you know what you sssay?"

"Yes. I know."

"Do you know what it meansss?"

She nodded and her l.u.s.trous brown hair fell over her shoulders. He resisted the urge to touch the filaments. He should not touch her at all until the bonding ritual was completed.

"For life," he explained anyway. "Forever and alwaysss."

"Forever and always," she repeated with a smile, yet liquid continued to spill from her eyes.

J'Qhir almost returned the smile, but thought better of it. Even though she had a.s.sured him numerous times he wasn't frightful when he smiled, he suspected she was only being kind.

"I know," she said breathlessly, "it is not your way to be demonstrative in a public place, but it is the custom of my people to seal a promise with a kiss.

He hesitated. His fingers ached to touch her, to run through her hair, to strip the thin fabric from her body and feel her liquid heat. Her presence and his improper thoughts poised him on the verge of release.

"It isss not proper we touch at all." But even as he spoke he moved toward her. His large hands framed her pale face. Her natural scent filled his nostrils as he bowed his head to hers. Their mouths met briefly, her warm moistness almost his undoing. He could allow no more and withdrew.

"J'Qhir, we have done much more than touch," she reminded him, her voice soft and husky.

"I want to do thisss in the mossst proper way."

Leith sighed and nodded. Her own words had come back to haunt her. She didn't want to stand here exchanging words, she wanted to place her arms around him and have him hold her as he had so many nights before. She had asked it of J'Qhir the first time they had made love and it was only fair that she concede to his request.

"We leave for Zi in one ssstandard week. Thisss ssshould be enough time for you to prepare. I have made arrangementsss for you to ssstay in the lair of Rohm'dh. You do remember him?"

Leith hesitated. Everything was happening too fast and not at all as she had hoped. She was thrilled he had come and asked her one more time, but she had wanted him to come on his own because he wanted her. Not because he felt obligation toward the child she carried. When he said Cameron had told him all that he needed to know, she thought her heart might burst from the disappointment. Of course, Cameron had told him of her pregnancy. He was her father and would do everything to protect her and the child.

J'Qhir watched her expectantly, saurian eyes unblinking. Cameron might not have told him about the complications and the risks. Or J'Qhir didn't understand how fragile their child was at this point.

"Of course, I remember him." She wrinkled her brow as she looked up at him. "But you expect me to go to Zi?"

He stiffened visibly. She saw every muscle go rigid and his jaw clench into knots. "Temporarily," he said coldly, "if that isss what you wisssh."

"J'Qhir. I can't go to Zi now. Perhaps we should talk more before we consider ourselves bound to one another." When his only response was the narrowing of his eyeslits, she continued. "I mean, I thought you understood...that my father had explained-"

"We are already bound, Leith," he said sharply. He hadn't listened to what she was doing a poor job of trying to say. He only heard what he interpreted as rejection. "a.s.ss sssoon a.s.ss you ssspoke the proper resssponssse, we were irrevocably bound. You sssealed it with your kisss."

"I know! I don't mean-"

"We go to Zi." He inhaled a hissing breath. "It will take time to build our lair. Usssually, one Zi year which isss lesss than a ssstandard year. The wood mussst be harvesssted from the mountainsss. Sssince I have no clossse male clansssmember, Rohm'dh ha.s.ss agreed to accompany me. While we collect the materialsss and conssstruct the lair, you will ssstay with hisss clan to learn-"

"J'Qhir! Are you saying you'l build the house yourself?" Her voice rose in pitch, but she could not control it. The incredulity of what he suggested overwhelmed her. "And I won't see you for a year?"

"It isss our way, Leith." He shook his head and turned his back to her, but not before she glimpsed the disappointment in his eyes. "I ssshould have made that more clear."

"I understand. But you have to understand, I can't-"

"When our lair isss finissshed and you and I have ssslept beneath itsss roof for three consssecutive nightsss," he cut her off as if she hadn't spoken. "Then we will be formally bound for life. It doesss not matter if we ssshare the sssame blanket. It will be done. Then, Leith, you may go wherever in the galaxy you wisssh."

Leith flinched at the harshness of the last of his words. The Zi did not swear, but he had, in effect, told her she could go to h.e.l.l. Leith drew in a deep, shuddering breath. If he was willing to be separated from her for a year and equally willing to let her go, then he couldn't know about the child! She had a.s.sumed her father told him about her condition, but what if he hadn't?

She placed her hands on his rigid back and laid her head on his shoulder blade. He didn't move away from her, but neither did he yield to her touch. Instead of trying to explain, she whispered, "I-I thought you would want to be with me when your child is born."

More tears filled her eyes and spilled over. She felt him grow pliant beneath her hands. Through the watery blur, she saw him turn and face her, but she couldn't tell if he was displeased or not. She blinked and rubbed at her eyes, but before she could see him clearly, he swept her up into his arms. Limping, he carried her deeper into the trees, until he found a stone bench encircled by hedges to ensure their privacy. He sat, but he kept her bundled against him. His head rested against hers.

"I want nothing more than to go to Zi with you or wherever you go. I want nothing more than to be with you." She slipped her arms around his neck and hugged him.

"Leith...Leith..." he murmured into her hair and held her tighter. "Why did you not tell me?"

"It was why I tried to get in touch with you. I finally decided you should know." She paused and then told him what had hurt her for so long. "You left, J'Qhir, you left without saying good-bye."

"Leith, there wa.s.ss no need to bid you farewell. I never intended to leave Artilia without ssspeaking with you. During the ssstruggle with Hanc.o.c.k, my knee wa.s.ss broken."

"I know. The Council wouldn't let them replace the joint. Why haven't you had this done?"

"I promisssed you I would not perform the ritual of failure. Thisss injury I will carry the ressst of my life a.s.ss my atonement."

"No, J'Qhir-"

"Leith, it isss not open to debate. You will allow me thisss." Briefly, he touched his crest to her forehead and continued. "Afterwardsss, I wa.s.ss sssedated for sssurgery. While I wa.s.ss ssstill unconsssciousss, the Council took it upon themssselvesss to transssport me to Zi."

Fresh tears filled her eyes and she hugged him closer. "I-I didn't know they had taken you without your consent. I a.s.sumed-well, I a.s.sumed the worst. I'm sorry."

"No, I ssshould beg forgivenesss from you. I let the Council control my actionsss and, in thisss inssstance, I ssshould not have. You are too important to me."

Leith laughed. "We're a fine pair, aren't we? I would trust you with my life, but I couldn't bring myself to completely trust you with my heart. And you-"

"Yesss, I. I did not trussst you enough to underssstand you truly meant you could not go to Zi, not that you would not."

Leith grew solemn. "Our baby. I can't go anywhere. I need to stay near Dr. Mitchel. She doesn't know..."

"Doesssn't know what?" he prompted gently.

"J'Qhir, she doesn't know if I can carry the baby full-term. She says every day I go without any major problems, the chances get better. But she's only guessing. She hasn't had much success getting obstetric information out of Zi, but then I wouldn't let her tell them the real reason either."

J'Qhir removed his arm from underneath her knees, and his hand hovered over her mid-section. "May I?"

"You never have to ask permission to touch me." She guided his hand to rest atop her swollen abdomen.

"Thisss changesss many thingsss."