Colder Than Ice Part 20

Allison dressed in her multiple layers, trying to make as little noise as possible. She pulled on her snow boots and s.n.a.t.c.hed at her goggles that sat on the overcrowded small shelf at the end of her bed. Without warning the end of the shelf tilted, and books, containers, and other personal items crashed to the floor.

Allison wheeled to Michela.

Michela frowned and tried to force her sleep-filled eyes open. She rubbed her face, as if to remove the effects of her sleep, and finally opened her eyes. "What's going on?" Michela looked at her watch. "Why are you dressed like that at this time in the morning?"

Allison pulled on her gloves. "I couldn't sleep and I was worried about whether Rob's improvements to the hut have done more harm than good. I'm just going to do a quick check on it and then I'll be straight back."

"What? Don't be stupid."

Allison glowered at Michela, shoved her beanie on her head, and reached for the door handle.

Before Allison got any further, Michela unzipped her sleeping bag, quickly rose, and closed her hand over Allison's, effectively halting her escape. "What the h.e.l.l do you think you're doing? It's at least minus thirty degrees Fahrenheit out there. You could d.a.m.n well get yourself killed."

Allison ripped her hand from the door handle and stood toe to toe with Michela. "How dare you raise your voice to me!"

"Don't even go there, woman. What did I tell you, no, what did I tell all of you about leaving the huts in this weather?"

"I heard what you said, buta""

Michela grabbed Allison's upper arms. "If that's the d.a.m.ned case then why did you try to disobey me? In fact, what is it with you? You seem to take a perverse pleasure in going out of your way to do exactly the opposite to what I ask you to do."

"I don't go out of the way to disobey you at all. I'm the only remaining archaeologist here and that b.l.o.o.d.y hut's my responsibility!"

"That may be the case, but you're my responsibility. As long as we're out here, that's the way it has to be Allison. I don't intend to lose anyone else," Michela yelled, stepping closer to Allison.

"Of course, we couldn't have that happen, could we?" Allison caught herself as she saw her barb had struck home.

This has nothing to do with the loss the camp's already suffered. It's you, Alli. It has only ever been about you. Can't you see that? Closing her eyes, Michela hung her head in defeat. She softened her grip on Allison's arms.

"Have you any idea what I feel for you? What would happen if I lost you? I told you only yesterday that I thought I found love with Natalie, but when I met you, you changed my whole focus. No matter how hard I try to hide my feelings and force them to be otherwise, I can't help but feel like I'm falling in love with you."

Michela stepped back from Allison. "I find myself wanting to know the smallest things about you. What's your middle name, how old are you? Do you have any brothers or sisters, what's your favorite food? That morning here, in this hut, when we returned from looking for Ewan, you don't know how much I wanted to kiss you. If Sarah hadn't knocked on the door then I'd have made a big fool of myself. I'm sorry, you're probably disgusted by this, but I can't take it any more." She turned around and went, arms folded and frustrated at her inability to keep her emotions in check, to her side of the hut.

Mouth agape, Allison was at a loss for words. She's falling in love with me? So how do I feel about that? She closed her eyes as images flashed through her mind. Her first meeting with Michela. Their first confrontation. Her disdainful treatment of her and Michela's rescue of her on the glacier at Mount Cook. That night in the coffee house, the touching of hands. Allison's insistence on little meetings during their sea voyage. Her reaction to Maddi and the time in the emergency hut. I think I feel the same. So where do I go from here?

Michela felt Allison's arms snake around her waist. She turned and found Allison in her arms.

Allison tentatively brushed Michela's cheek. "Jane, hence my nickname AJ, thirty-two but closer to thirty-three, one brother Justin and he's a doctor, chocolate, always chocolate, and why don't you finish it?"

"Finish what?" Michela asked.

"This." Allison put her hand on the back of Michela's head and drew her close.

Surprised by Allison's boldness, Michela pulled back, only to find her lips pursued by Allison's. Surrendering to the sensations coursing through her, she tentatively mapped Allison's back with her hands. Despite the layers of fabric, she was painfully aware of Allison's muscular strength.

Allison broke the kiss and put her head against Michela's chest, surprised that the rapid beating of Michela's heart matched her own. She'd never meant to react the way she did, but was glad she had. Seeing the pain and honesty in Michela's eyes had shattered her resolve and, despite what she kept on telling herself, she could deny it no longer. The feelings she had for Michela were equally strong. The kiss was sweeter and more pa.s.sionate than anything she'd ever experienced before. She smiled into Michela's sleeping s.h.i.+rt.

"I don't think I could have said it before but you make me feel the same way," she said. "You've had me off kilter since the day at the creva.s.se in New Zealand when you held me and called me honey. Not only that, but whether I liked it or not, before things ended with Rick I found myself irrationally measuring you up against him and he was failing dismally. No matter how hard I tried to run from it, when you looked my way I felt as if I was melting from the inside out. And as for that second night in the emergency hut, you were generating so much heat, I severely doubted that we needed a sleeping bag. I was so incredibly aroused it was only doubt and a degree of ignorance that stopped me from doing heaven knows what."

Michela chuckled and kissed Allison's forehead. "Me, too. When you snuggled back into me I thought I was going to die. It was only my promise I wouldn't compromise you that stopped me from taking it further."

Allison shyly leant back from Michela. "I still feel as I did that night in the hut. Where do we go from here?"

Michela slightly leant back and frowned. "Are you sure this is what you want? This has been a very stressful time out here for everyone, not the least of which you. I don't want you to think you have to commit to something you don'ta"" Allison placed a silencing finger on her lips.

"I've been known to be indecisive, but I think, no, I know I'm sure about this. It's not about stress or being here for as long as we have, it's about how I feel for you. It has been for a while now, I was just too stubborn and proud to admit it." Covering her shyness, Allison leaned in for a kiss just as the final cup that had been precariously balanced on her bookcase fell and shattered on the floor.

Allison bent her head down and chuckled. "I made a bit of a mess, didn't I." She moved out of Michela's arms and turned to the broken cup. "Let me clean it up."

"Leave it." As Michela opened her arms in invitation, Allison eagerly entered them. With one finger, she gently lifted Allison's chin and kissed her. Lightly stroking Allison's face, Michela was engulfed by emotions. Almost tentatively she stroked the tip of her tongue across Allison's lips and smiled when entrance was granted. She lightly teased Allison's tongue and her senses caught fire as Allison's tongue shyly entered her mouth.

Allison was on sensory overload. When Michela had brushed her lips she honestly thought her legs would fail her. The sensations now went far beyond what she'd ever experienced before. The heat in her stomach was a raging inferno that was rapidly engulfing her body. She broke away from the kiss and managed to whisper into Michela's ear, "G.o.d, I want so much more. I don't know what to do."

Michela relaxed her embrace. She cupped Allison's cheek in her hand as she lightly stroked it with her thumb. "Do you remember what we talked about yesterday, about Elizabeth and Charlotte?" Allison furrowed her brows. "You asked me whether the two were lovers or in a Boston marriage. Do you remember what I said?"

Allison shook her head.

Stroking Allison's face, Michela gazed into her piercing cobalt eyes. "I said it didn't matter whether they were lovers or not, it was the emotion behind the act and not the act itself." Allison nodded. Michela lightly grazed Allison's lips with her own. "Let your emotions lead you, the rest will follow." She pulled Allison to her and they stood, relis.h.i.+ng in the warmth and comfort of each other.

Michela stepped back and held out her hand to Allison. "Let me show you."

Allison took the hand and Michela led her to her bed. Michela slowly undressed Allison, only pausing to scatter feather-soft kisses on her face to convey the depth of emotion she felt.

Allison put her fingers on the b.u.t.tons of Michela's sleeping s.h.i.+rt, only to have them gently halted.

Michela pulled Allison's hand to her lips and tenderly kissed her fingers. "You don't have to do that."

Allison shook her head, a shy smile on her face. "But I want to. For so many nights I watched you undress, always disappointed when you got into bed." She lightly kissed Michela's cheek. "Please let me help."

Michela softly captured Allison's lips and guided Allison's hands to her s.h.i.+rt. They slowly undressed each other, relieved at the trust and pa.s.sion that was reflected in each other's eyes. Finally naked, they stood and silently wors.h.i.+pped the other's body.

Michela reached across the small distance, and tenderly traced the curve of Allison's breast with the back of her fingers. "You are so incredibly beautiful."

Allison shuddered at the effect of Michela's touch.

Michela pulled Allison to her and reveled in the feel of skin against skin. She traced a lazy trail down Allison's back and rested her hand on her baby-soft backside.

Allison, hands lightly draped on Michela's waist, gasped at the sensation created by their closeness. Between ragged breaths, she kissed Michela's neck and looked up. "Please, baby, help me."

Michela snagged the sleeping bag off the other bed and put it next to her bag. She held out her hand to Allison and in return Allison silently took Michela's hand. Michela eased Allison onto the bed and climbed in next to her. As she did she offered a silent prayer of thanks at the wider beds now fitted in the apples.

Michela traced a gentle path over Allison's skin, barely touching her. She paused at the bottom of Allison's stomach and lightly played with the downy hair below her navel, before grazing the warm hollow near her waist. She traced Allison's b.r.e.a.s.t.s with feather-light touches, lovingly delivered with the back of her hand, intensely aware of Allison's building arousal. Halting her sensual path, she gazed into Allison's eyes. "Honey, I want to make love to you, but if I do anything you're not comfortable with please stop me. I'd never do anything to hurt you."

Allison sweetly smiled. She kissed Michela's palm and then shyly guided it to the swell of her breast. "I don't think you could ever hurt me." She sealed her words with a kiss.

Humbled by Allison's trust, Michela ever so gently kissed a trail of love over Allison's body. She was in turn rewarded by Allison's feather-light touches as they charted a path across Michela's body, tentatively grazing across Michela's b.r.e.a.s.t.s before retreating.

As their dance of love progressed, their touches became bolder, more certain, each quietly pleased at the sensations they created in the other. Murmuring words of love, Michela tenderly stroked Allison, barely containing her own response to Allison's ardor.

Sensing Michela's need, Allison captured her lips and shyly moved her thigh to meet Michela's centre. Pa.s.sionately connected, they sensuously moved together, harmoniously building to a climax. They crested together and continued to move in exquisite synchronization before finally slowing down, entwined around each other's body.

Regaining her breath, Michela looked at Allison. "Honey, are you all right?"

Allison stroked Michela's face. "Thank you. Thank you for being so patient with me. Thank you for putting up with my bad moods and my tantrums. But most of all, thank you for loving me." Her voice broke as her eyes misted with tears.

Fighting her own tears, Michela pulled Allison to her and tenderly kissed her forehead. "Always, my love, for forever and beyond."

WHILE THE STORM raged outside, Michela and Allison took the time to discover each other and were delighted at what they found. Their days pa.s.sed peacefully, sometimes doing no more than completing their respective research, sometimes not getting out of bed at all. Occasionally they'd disagree on one issue or another.

Such discussions would lapse into arguments, end with stony silence, and then they would pa.s.sionately reconcile their differences.

Finally, after seven days of being buffeted by the wind, Michela awoke, her body comfortably covered by Allison. She gently shook Allison. "Alli, honey, wake up."

Allison nuzzled the chest she'd used on and off as a pillow for the past few days. "Don't want to."

Michela smiled and kissed the top of Allison's head. "Okay, then just listen." Allison s.h.i.+fted and a couple of seconds later slumped against Michela. "What's the matter?"

Allison's voice was m.u.f.fled as she clung to the Michela's body. "I don't want to go. Can't we stay here and let the rest of the world go on without us?"

Michela put her hand underneath Allison's chin and tilted her face up. "It'll be okay, trust me. I think I understand how you feel right now, but we'll work it out." She softly and lovingly kissed Allison's lips. "But if we don't get this place cleaned up, we're likely to have Sarah walk in on us."

Allison almost leapt from the bed. She quickly bathed and dressed and then helped in straightening the hut.

"Michela, this is Sarah, can I come over, over."

Michela and Allison laughed at Sarah's perfect timinga"they'd just finished making the place presentable.

Sarah walked into the hut and observed the look that pa.s.sed between Michela and Allison. "G'day you two. That was some storm wasn't it?" Trying to hide her "I told you so" smile, she looked at Allison and was surprised by a touch of reticence in her face. Puzzled, she glanced at Michela. Michela almost imperceptibly shook her head.

Breaking the slight tension, Michela clapped Sarah's shoulder. "Yes, it was. Now, how about some breakfast? Have we managed to regain communications with Wills Station yet?"

Sarah nodded. "That happened about four hours ago. Maddi suggested we finish breaking down the camp and then head for the station."

Allison slammed her cup on the counter, startling Michela and Sarah. They caught a brief glimpse of her angry expression before she turned away from them. Michela gave Sarah a "don't ask" look.

"She's right," Michela said. "We'll start with breakfast and then pull these huts down. That should take no more than a couple of hours and then we'll be on our way. Alli, how about we try some of Sarah's cooking for a change?"

Allison nodded, fighting back the irrational frustration at hearing Maddi Walker's name. While she was grateful for Michela's explanation of what had occurred between her and Maddi, she couldn't help but wonder if Maddi felt the same way. "That sounds like a plan. Let's go." Allison walked around Michela and Sarah and out the door.

Sarah gave Michela a quizzical look. "What's that about? I'm a.s.suming that by the look you gave me that you two finally sorted out your differences."

"Yes, we did. But ever since this morning when we woke up and found the storm had pa.s.sed over, she's progressively withdrawn into herself." And not prepared to admit what's happened between the two of us to the world.

Sarah rubbed Michela's back. "Give it time. It's got to be a h.e.l.l of a change for her. Maybe the trip back with the four of us is what she needs to help sort herself out and what this change means to her."

Michela followed Sarah to the other apple. I just hope that's all it is, and she's not having second thoughts. I don't think I could cope.

Chapter Eleven.

My Darling Charlotte, My love, the daylight hours grow shorter here as winter tightens its grip against Ian Ross and myself. Only yesterday our team member Malcolm Pitt, succ.u.mbed to the pneumonia that had racked his poor body for the last week. The weather is so forbidding and cold that it took us most of the day to dig any more than a pitifully shallow sc.r.a.pe in the ice. We served him into his sleeping bag and built a makes.h.i.+ft sled to take him to his final resting-place. After a short ceremony, we covered him and returned to the cold and loneliness of our hut.

Despite that only two of us remain, our food is slowly running out. As the days progress, even the simplest of tasks become a burden, made even more so by the injury to Ian's leg, which stubbornly refuses to heal. It is only my commitment to maintaining Ian's spirits that force me out of bed at all. However, I fear the day will soon be upon us when neither of us moves, consigning us to our own fate. To have come so far and hoped for so much, only to arrive at where we are now. How did I allow it to come to this?

ERF.

Antarcticaa"2010 THE ABSENCE OF the BOB-trak allowed the team to return to Will's Station in their sno-trak at a comfortable cruising speed of twenty five miles an hour. Instead of the tedious nine days it had taken to get to the site, Rob estimated they would spend no more than two nights on the ice.

Taking advantage of the vehicle's speed, and after a quick discussion with Michela, Rob deviated from the original route and took them to a rookery, populated by emperor penguins and their recently hatched young.

For the first time since leaving the base, Allison surfaced from her introspective mood. The sound of the adult penguins was almost unbearable as they squawked over one another to be heard. She carefully walked to the rookery and smiled at the penguins as they waddled around her, as if her presence there was an everyday event. She took her video from its bag on her hip and filmed the adults, with their resplendent black and white plumage, trimmed by a neck of golden yellow. She softly laughed at their antics and at the sweet grey chicks that followed their parents' every step. Preoccupied in her task, she was startled by a crunch on the snow behind her.

Michela walked to Allison's side. "They're funny, aren't they? Last time I was down here I was taken to an Adelie penguin rookery. The Adelie are small compared to these and much more in keeping with the traditional black and white penguin."

Allison nodded, surprised and yet, awkwardly silenced by Michela's arrival. She finished her filming and returned her camera to its bag.

Michela brushed Allison's arm with her hand. Allison turned to her.

"Is anything wrong?" Michela asked.

Allison looked where Michela's hand rested, lightly grasping her wrist, and then gazed at the vista. What is the matter with me? Only days ago everything seemed so perfect and now, well, I'm not so sure. She returned her gaze to Michela. "No. I think I'm tired and a little bit disappointed that we didn't get a lot more done than we did at the dig site."

Michela shook her head. "You and the rest of your crew did wonders. You've established it well for any further excavations. Don't lessen the degree of what you achieved because you didn't uncover the complete hut." Michela took Allison's hand. "And besides, I'm proud of you."

Allison looked at the hand covering her own and then slowly released it. "I know. I wish we were back there, that's all."

Disappointed at Allison's detachment and yet sensing she wanted some time to herself, Michela softly rubbed Allison's back, before leaving her to her own thoughts.

Allison listened to Michela's footfall as she walked away, and winced at her actions. Why did I do that when she touched me? Not less than twenty-four hours ago she touched me and I welcomed it. What's changed?

The more she thought about her response to Michela's touch, the more confused she became. I mean, I really do like her. But everything seems to have gotten a heck of a lot more complex. How am I supposed to act around her? Are we allowed to touch each other in public? Do I want her to touch me in public? What about what other people say? My friends have no idea what's gone on down here, not to mention my parents. And what about my job? What does this mean for my job? She cursed the loss of the isolation and intimacy she'd shared with Michela during the final days at Finlayson camp and longed to return to the time when it was just her and Michela alone.

Hearing Rob calling her back, she trudged back to the sno-trak for the rest of their return journey.

MICHELA WATCHED AS Allison headed into the main building at Will's Station. Shaking her head, she went to the rear of the sno-trak to help Sarah unhook the container from the vehicle.

Sarah motioned her head at Allison. "So, how're things going between you two?"

Michela let out an exasperated breath. "I really don't know. It seems the closer we got to this place the more withdrawn she became."

Sarah pulled the trailer away from the sno-trak. "I saw you talking at the rookery. Did she mention anything there?"

"No. She seems to be fine when there's the four of us, but when it's just us, she's almost reticent to discuss anything."