His Royal Highness, Wants A Divorce! Chapter 14

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Under Tang Qi’s intense uneasiness, the few of them arrived at the brothel. 

It was as Yan Ke said. There was a group of girls standing at the entrance, waving the little silk scarves in their hands as they solicited customers. They even said the same words as Yan Ke, “Gentlemen, come in for some fun~”

Tang Qi cast a glance at Yan Ke, who had become excited as soon as he entered the brothel. Tang Qi had a strong desire to have the last word, and so he had already thought of countermeasures on the way here.

Tang Qi tugged at the skin of his throat and coughed. Standing in the middle of the hall in the brothel, he bellowed loudly and spoke once he had the attention of everyone, “To all the ladies serving us, please take note. This is the Crown Princess of the State of Yue. He’s here for a drink. Please stay two meters1 away from him!”

Yan Ke did not expect this seemingly robust buddy to make such a sudden move. He silently let loose a string of obscenities at him. Then he smiled and said, “The Crown Prince is away.”

Tang Qi, “…”

Your Highness, are you really intent on being a playboy?! Don’t you know that those bodyguards the steward sent along to protect you are all personal guards of the Crown Prince?!

Tang Qi said, “The Crown Prince is away, but all of you should know what the Crown Prince is doing out there! He left his newly married wife2 and went out to war all for the sake of the peace and honor of our country. Feel your conscience and ask yourself, could you bear to defile the Crown Prince’s man?!”

Yan Ke, “…”

Pardon me! I’m not learned nor thick-skinned enough. I can’t bring myself to preach about national honor in a brothel. I concede defeat!

d.a.m.n r.e.t.a.r.d!

If this were in modern times, it would be a waste of talent if Tang Qi did not serve as a diplomat with that level of eloquence.

It had to be said that Tang Qi’s slightly r.e.t.a.r.ded words were still very effective. At least, there were ladies beside each of the buddies who had accompanied him here, but there was not a single flower around Yan Ke no matter where he went. 

He had never thought of fooling around while he was still married; he was honestly just curious about this place!

Although Yan Ke did not want to admit it, he had been an old virgin in those over twenty years in his past life. Feeling that he had lost out, he had wanted to see the place where legendary beautiful women gathered.

As soon as he sat down and the wine came, the young masters who had held the finger-pointing conference on the way here began to talk to Yan Ke after gaining courage from the wine.

A tall and thin young master stood up and offered Yan Ke a cup of wine. Tang Qi helped to introduce him from the side.

Tang Qi, “This is Liu Kang, the son of the richest clan in the capital.”

Yan Ke raised his cup to touch Liu Kang’s cup and introduced himself. “My name is Yan Ke. You can just call me by my name. It’s too formal and distant to keep calling me Your Highness.”

Another refined man, dressed in azure clothing and holding a folding fan, stood up as well.

Tang Qi introduced, “This is the son of the Prime Minister, Shangguan Yang. And beside Shangguan is Chang Heng, the son of Meng You’s deputy general.”

Yan Ke smiled and clinked cup of wine with them one after the other. This white wine was not like beer; it was extremely strong. He was a chef in his past life, and so he had abstained from alcohol to protect his taste buds. Even if he drank by himself, this body now could not handle that much wine. He had only taken three cups when he felt a little tipsy. 

Several ladies from the brothel sitting beside Tang Qi had listened to his introductions earlier. On knowing that each of these men was no ordinary person, they all worked hard to serve them.

Perhaps they hoped to form connections with these young masters. Even if they could not marry into a reputable family, it would still be a good thing if the young masters took a liking to them and redeemed them from the brothel.

Yan Ke threw a peanut into his mouth, looked at the young men who were overwhelmed by the girls and at their wits’ ends, and laughed. “You guys really have not been here before?”

Several people shook their heads in unison.

Yan Ke, “Then, Meng You hasn’t been here either?”

Tang Qi burst out laughing. “The one most unlikely to come here is Shu Li.”

Yan Ke, “Hmm?”

Liu Kang, son of the richest man sitting on the other side of Yan Ke, was in high spirits. “Not that no one has ever sent maidens to Shu Li before. Each of them was stunning. I remembered there was a time when a maiden was even delivered right to Shu Li’s bed?”

Everyone nodded their heads in unison.

Liu Kang continued. “Tsk, tsk. That night, the quick-tempered Crown Prince kicked that beautiful maiden out. What’s more, on the second night, he reciprocated the favor and sent a maiden to the bed of the same corrupt official who had tried to bribe him with women.”

Liu Kang was laughing as he spoke, which made Yan Ke anxious.

Yan Ke urged him on, “Can you finish the story before you laugh?”

Tang Qi added, “That corrupt official had a tigress in his house. From what I’ve heard, when his wife found a beautiful woman on his bed that night, she chased him everywhere with a chopper. At last, the corrupt official had nowhere else to hide, so he took his own account book and turned himself in to the yamen, eventually going into hiding in prison.”

This plot twist made Yan Ke laugh.

Liu Kang was the most talkative among them. Once the past was brought up, he started to rattle on. “Do you guys still remember another time? Wasn’t it because Shu Li had never touched a maiden that someone started spreading rumors that the Crown Prince of the State of Yue liked men? At that time, many people were thinking of ways to have a chance encounter with the Crown Prince. One of them seemed to have waited over a month at the entrance of the Crown Prince’s residence. He prolly even found out the times Shu Li would leave left and return to the residence.”

“Then, one day, he saw Shu Li’s sedan returning. Those legs were even faster than the steward of the Crown Prince’s residence. He was going to receive Shu Li’s sedan. Then Yan Ke, guess what Shu Li did?”

Yan Ke shook his head to indicate that he could not guess since he was not mentally deficient.

Liu Kang laughed again. “After he got out of the carriage, he threw two blows at the man, bas.h.i.+ng him to the ground until he could not move.”

Yan Ke asked, “Why did he hit him for no reason?”

Liu Kang replied, “At that time, the Crown Prince’s residence was recruiting secret guards. He thought the man was there to apply for the position. After thras.h.i.+ng the man, he even said angrily to the steward…” 

Liu Kang wanted to imitate Meng You’s unique expression, but he thought it would be better to hand this heavy responsibility over to Tang Qi.

Tang Qi instantly got into the act, deepened his voice and started to imitate Meng You. “Don’t recruit these kinds of pretty boys. If we encounter any danger, I’d still have to protect him.”

Yan Ke laughed.

All right, he couldn’t really blame their Crown Prince for being a d.i.c.khead now. After all, he has been a d.i.c.khead all the while, not just now. 

They chatted about Meng You for quite a while.　

As they ate and drank, a few people had already fallen drunk. 

Yan Ke had more self-control, and he was not really interested in wine, so he never touched the wine again after those few cups.

Drinking alcohol would damage the taste buds. He did not even dare to touch beer before, let alone white wine. He must retain his sense of taste to eat all the good stuff he made.

Several of them were already too drunk to walk by the time they left the brothel. Yan Ke asked several secret guards who knew the directions to give them a free ride home. Then, he returned home with the remaining guard.

The steward looked at Yan Ke’s flushed face. Although Yan Ke did not embrace any ladies, it was still inevitable for the faint scent of rouge powder to linger. The steward did not even have to think about it to realize where the Crown Princess had gone. Although he said nothing, he inwardly started to grumble about Tang Qi.

He had allowed Tang Qi to take the Crown Princess out for some fresh air because he was close friends with the Crown Prince. But look what happened? He had taken the Crown Princess straight to the brothel!

Yan Ke listened as the steward sent someone to prepare some tea to sober him up. He turned around to stop the maidservant. “I didn’t drink much; just two cups. It’s late, you may all take a rest. I’ll wash up before I sleep.”

Having gotten up so early in the morning and having drunk some wine, Yan Ke did not know how he had even managed to get himself back. He could barely open his eyes now, and he was still feeling groggy.

As soon as he entered his chamber, the steward sent someone to prepare water for Yan Ke to wash up.

Yan Ke pepped himself up and comfortably climbed onto the bed after taking a bath. 

Hopefully, he would receive the divorce papers from the Crown Prince the day after tomorrow!

———

The next day, while Meng You was still resting, he heard a din outside. He was a light sleeper, and so he was roused from sleep by the conversation outside.

He could vaguely hear the men in the barracks discussing his Crown Princess. 

Meng You opened his eyes and reckoned that the messenger had arrived.

Meng You sighed. Bring it on. Let him see what his Crown Princess was up to now.

Meng You got dressed and walked out. He was stunned when he saw the three big wooden boxes outside his own tent. 

He could faintly catch a whiff of an appetizing aroma. Pointing to the wooden boxes on the ground with his hand, Meng, You wondered, “These are…”

The messenger wiped his sweat. To preserve the taste and freshness of these dishes, they had rushed to the frontier without stopping. Fortunately, they arrived before the weather turned hot.

Messenger, “The Crown Princess asked us to deliver these to Your Highness.”

Meng You opened the wooden boxes, and the fragrance of the dishes. .h.i.t him right in the face. Meng You was stunned. “He got all of you to deliver so many dishes from that far away?”

The messenger nodded.

Meng You laughed even as he was annoyed. “I give up on him.”

Saying so, he got someone to move the food to his tent. On inhaling the aroma of these homemade dishes, those who were still mocking the Crown Princess for being such a clingy and persistent man began to envy their Crown Prince.

Although no one received a letter from home when they first arrived on the battlefield, no one had also ever received a home-cooked meal.

Meng You glanced at the well-preserved dishes on his table. Just the aroma alone was enough to whet up one’s appet.i.te. 

Perhaps his first letter was not recalled back by the messenger and ended up in Yan Ke’s hands. Then, Yan Ke had prepared an entire table of dishes for him after reading his letter.

Meng You was not in a hurry to eat. He took Yan Ke’s letter and began to read it.

Your Highness, I obtained these dishes from a newly opened restaurant in the capital. If you like them, you must remember my great kindness. It’ll come in handy in the future when we get a divorce. If you don’t want to owe me any favors, then you can immediately brandish your brush right after eating them and send me the divorce papers!

After our divorce, you will once again become the Most Popular3 Golden Bachelor of the State of Yue with 3,000 beauties in your embrace! Are you moved? If you’re moved, then act quickly!

Meng You, “…”

Meng You felt that he was a well-read man, but it was really kind of difficult to read Yan Ke’s letter. He recognized the individual words, but the meaning on the whole was hard to get. He could barely understand the contents, and it was with some difficulty that he managed to finish the letter.

Meng You was not in a hurry to reply. He decided to fill his stomach first.

He tried a piece of braised spare ribs. The good thing was that it was not winter now. Although eating it cold was not as good as freshly cooked spare ribs, the taste was still not too bad.

At first, he did not have high expectations. He had tried all the restaurants in the capital, and the taste was all average. But still, it was Yan Ke’s thoughts that counted.

But once he had tasted it, he immediately began to gorge himself.

After seeing the Crown Prince accepting an entire table of dishes, the deputy general and lieutenants all waited outside with bowls in their hands for the Crown Prince to give the command for them to help him finish up whatever he could not finish. 

They waited and waited in vain. 

The deputy general next to Meng You gently lifted the tent flap to look, meeting Meng You who was enjoying the delicious food right in the eyes.

The deputy general was heartbroken. “…”

These may be from the Crown Princess, but Your Highness, you would always share with us in the past!

Meng You, “…”  

Deputy General, “Your Highness, can I ask you a question?”

Meng You stuffed a spoonful of rice into his mouth and said, “Ask away.” 

Deputy General, “Your Highness, can you finish all these?”

Meng You, “…?” 

The deputy general took out his own bowl. Then, beside his bowl, several more hands reached out with bowls in them.

A few pairs of eyes looked piteously at Meng You.

Meng You, “…”

Meng You, “Come in.”

The Deputy General grinned. “All right!”　

Meng You ate three bowls of rice. He had not eaten well these days, but he could have a full meal this time. With such incredible culinary skills, that newly opened restaurant must be doing very well!

He should write a letter to the steward and get him to recruit this chef over to the Crown Prince’s residence. Come to think of it, Yan Ke must have liked the food, so he had prepared them for him.

After finis.h.i.+ng his meal, Meng You sat at his desk and began to write a reply letter to Yan Ke.

The food from this restaurant in the capital is really delicious. I like them! How are you back home? Did Tang Qi and the other guys take you out for a walk? As for divorce, it’s not just about us. I know you don’t really want a divorce. So don’t worry. I won’t force you to agree to it. 

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Some Rights ReservedFootnotes1 meter = 3.2 feet = 1.10 yardThe author literally used the word ‘wife’ here LOLThe “most popular” here refers to the most amount of follows, or followers, on social media. Yan Ke used Weibo term for ‘follow’ here.