My Soul Will Find Yours 26 Calm Down, Hear

I gulped, remembering an article in a women's magazine I once read. The little indents on Kaname's back signify good health and an even better s.e.x life, if my memory serves me right. I suddenly remembered what he said last night about his virility.. I immediately slapped my cheeks to banish those thoughts.

I sighed. I've been celibate for almost a decade. After Tyler, I didn't date anyone and immersed myself in work. 'Is this because I haven't done it for years?' I asked myself. I looked at Kaname's sleeping form again and noticed the intricate tattoo on his left arm. It was usually covered by his sleeves so it was the first time I've seen it. I scooted closer to admire it.

The tattoo started from his shoulder and ended on his wrist. Two huge red kois and some clouds covered his skin, a few waves here and there could also be seen. It must have taken forever to make, I thought to myself.

Kaname slept while I flipped through the guidebook I brought with me. I turned to page eight and frowned. The statue that was made in this great shogun's memory didn't give him justice. Compared to the real thing, the sculpture looked tacky. I wondered if I should show him the book for a brief moment but decided against it. Who would want to read about themselves as if they're long gone and dead? Surely, he would be displeased. I placed the book inside my bag and looked for my wallet and travel doc.u.ments. Thoughts of whether I'll be able to return to my time plagued me as I looked at my pa.s.sport. Is mum okay, is she worried sick because she hasn't gotten in touch with me for hours now? What was the purpose of my coming into this time? Will my presence in this palace alter history? I sighed for the nth time as I rested my head on low table. I thought about it more until I fell asleep.

~~~

I felt two strong arms carry me to the futon. I slowly opened my eyes to find myself in Kaname's arms.

"My apologies for waking you," he said as he laid me on the futon.

I just shook my head and looked around. "Is it time for you to leave?" I asked.

"Yes," he nodded. "It's time for me to return to the omote[1]. I have to meet with the bureaucrats."

"You look much better," I noted.

He chuckled. "With hands as skillful as yours, who wouldn't feel refreshed?" He grabbed one of my hands and gave its back a quick peck. "Thank you for this afternoon, my lady."

I blushed. "It's nothing."

He chuckled again. "As much as I'd like to stay and be with you the entire day, I can't. I have a country to run." He stood and, as was his habit, straightened his kimono.

I got up as well. "Will you be staying here tonight as well?" I asked shyly.

"Do you want me to?" he grabbed my waist and asked, his eyes held a playful yet hopeful glint.

I looked down and nodded. My cheeks reddened at my admission. He ran his fingers through my hair, "Alright. Then I am all yours tonight."

I smiled and walked him to the door. "Don't tire yourself too much."

"I won't," he promised.

~~~

For weeks, Kaname spent his visits with me. We always spent our time together talking about our lives although, admittedly, I almost always did all the talking. He said he loved hearing about the future and what it's like. There were some things that I found difficult to explain, like how a plane flies and a computer works, but he was quick to understand despite my lack of knowledge in the area.

"Those machines sound very impressive," he said.

We were strolling around the inner palace's garden one afternoon. Winter was nearing so we were bundled up. I wanted to have a change of scenery so I suggested a quick walk outside.

"They are, I wish you could see them."

He stopped to look at me. "Do you miss it? Your life in the future, I mean."

I tilted my head to the side as I thought about it. "My life there is fast paced and busy. I wake up in the morning, go to work, go home, and sleep. I was a corporate slave. Do I miss it? Not really. But do I miss my home? Yes, definitely."

"You said you live with your mother. Do you take after her?"

"A lot of people say that I am her younger version," I looked up at the sky. "I miss her terribly."

Kaname suddenly enveloped me in a hug. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry that there's nothing I can do to sooth your longing for your mother."

I returned his hug. "Maybe I was sent here to change something. I might return once I've accomplished it."

He tightened his arms around me. "I hope you fail."

"Kaname, that's very bad of you!"

"I want you to stay, Hinata. I don't want you to leave, ever."

My eyes started to sting. Kaname has always been frank and honest. These past few weeks, he stayed with me without asking for more. He never mentioned anything about being his woman again and appeared as though he was content with just being with me. He would occasionally be affectionate by giving me pecks on the forehead and hugging me like right now but other than these, he hasn't forced me into doing something I didn't want. He was firm about taking it slow with me.

"Kaname, thank you."

He loosened his arms around me to look me in the eyes. "For what?"

"For everything," I smiled. "You've been awfully kind to me.. A girl in weird clothing you met in a forest."

He smiled back, his face was so dazzling I felt my heart race. "It's nothing. Everything I've done for you, I've done wholeheartedly."

I narrowed my eyes at him and gave him a little pinch on his side. "You are such a smooth talker!"

He laughed, "What? I'm just being honest with you!" he raised his hands up as if in surrender.

"Hmph!" I pretended to not believe him and left. This is dangerous, I said to myself. Calm down, heart. Calm down.

"Hinata, wait!" he ran after me. "I was serious! Promise!"

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[1] Outer palace.