The Smiling, Proud Wanderer 26 Chapter Fourteen: Wine Cups Part 1
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"Even though Kaifeng is a big city, there's not a great deal of interest in martial arts around here. And for people like old Escort Hua, senior Master Hai, or the Three Elites of Henan, they have neither truly outstanding martial arts skills nor great fame. Let's just tour around some of the scenic spots and historical sites. We can skip visiting anyone or any studios so we won't disturb anyone," Yue Buqun suggested.
"But senior apprentice brother, have you forgotten that very famous figure in the city of Kaifeng?" Madam Yue grinned.
"A very famous figure? Who…who are you referring to?" Yue Buqun asked.
"'Cure one and kill one; kill one then cure one. Cure as many as I kill; that shows my skill.' Now who's that?" Madam Yue gave a hint.
"Aha, you are talking about the 'Killer Doctor' Ping One-Finger. He is indeed very famous. But he's so eccentric that he most probably wouldn't want to see us even if we paid him a visit," Yue Buqun said with a smile.
"That's true. Or else we could have asked this Killer Doctor to take a look at Chong's injuries since Chong's inner wounds are not getting any better and we just happen to be coming to Kaifeng anyway," Madam Yue agreed.
"Mom, what does the nickname Killer Doctor mean? If he is a killer, how can he be a famous doctor?" Yue Lingshan asked in curiosity.
"Well, this Doctor Ping is a weirdo…well…a strange fellow in the Martial World. He has profound medical knowledge and his magical hands can bring the dying back to life. It is said that regardless of how ill or how badly wounded the patient is, so long as he agrees to work on him the patient will be cured for sure. But he has this very odd rule. He says that G.o.d of Heaven and Lord of Underworld, of course, both know how many people are there in this world. If he cured too many people so that less people die, there would be too many living and too few dead. Certainly the Lord of Underworld is not going to be too fond of that. And when his final days come, even if the Lord of Underworld leaves him alone, his officers and goblins would for sure get even with him, therefore, his days in the underworld probably are not going to be easy at all," Madam Yue explained with a light grin.
Quite amused by these words, all the apprentices giggled.
"That's why he made an oath," Madam Yue continued, "that so long as he cures someone, he must kill another one to even the numbers. And if he kills someone, he must cure another one to make up. He put up this big banner right in his office, which said clearly, 'Cure one and kill one; kill one then cure one. Cure as many as I kill; that shows my skill.' He says that because of this practice, the G.o.d of Heaven wouldn't fault him for taking away lives, and Lord of Underworld wouldn't blame him for taking over his business either."
The entire audience burst into loud laughter.
"What a funny guy this Doctor Ping One-Finger is! But why does he have such a strange name? Has he only one finger?" Yue Lingshan asked.
"I think he has more than just one finger," Madam Yue answered. "Senior apprentice brother, do you know why he picked such a name?" she asked her husband.
"Doctor Ping has all ten fingers. He called himself One-Finger because either to kill or to cure, he only needs one finger to do it. If he wants to kill someone, he just hits him with one finger, and if he wants to cure someone, he only uses one finger to check pulses," Yue Buqun clarified.
"Oh, I see. Then I suppose he must be an expert in sealing pressure points," Madam Yue remarked.
"That I am not too sure. There probably isn't that many who has fought this Doctor Ping before. Everyone in the Martial World knows how good of a doctor he is. In one's life, who can say that he is immune to unexpected misfortunes? Maybe one day he will need to ask for Doctor Ping's help, that's why no one wants to offend Doctor Ping. But unless it's absolutely necessary, no one would just rashly ask for his help either," Yue Buqun said.
"Why's that?" Yue Lingshan couldn't help but ask.
"Because whenever a fellow martial person asks him to cure a wound or disease, he would make this person swear an oath ahead of time that after the person is cured, he must obey Dr. Ping's order to kill a person Dr. Ping specifies. This is called one life in exchange for another. It's easier if the person is asked to kill someone totally unrelated to himself, but if he is asked to kill someone who's a close friend of his, or even his father, brother, wife, or son, then wouldn't it be real difficult?" Yue Buqun explained.
"This Doctor Ping is truly odd!" the apprentices remarked.
"Big apprentice brother, in that case, you can't really ask him to work on you then," Yue Lingshan concluded.
Linghu Chong had been propping against the door at the backside, listening to Master and Master-Wife discussing the peculiarity of the "Killer Doctor" Ping One-Finger. When he heard little apprentice sister's words, he replied with a slight smile on his cheeks.
"That's right! I would be very afraid if he asks me to kill my little apprentice sister, once he cures me."
That brought loud laughter out from the rest of the apprentices.
Yue Lingshan also grinned. "This Doctor Ping has no grudge against me. Why would he ask you to kill me?" She turned her head and asked her father, "Dad, then is this Doctor Ping a good guy or a bad guy?"
"Well, it is said that he is quite grumpy, and always do things to his liking, sometimes chivalrous and sometimes irregular. He is really neither a good guy nor a bad guy. To say it nicely, he is a strange genius. But in plain words, he would be a freak," Yue Buqun answered.
"Here's what I think. Many of the rumors flowing around the Martial World are really exaggerations, and this might just be one of them. When we get to the city of Kaifeng, I'd like to go pay a visit to this Doctor Ping," Yue Lingshan responded.
"Nonsense! Don't be mischievous!" Both Yue Buqun and Madam Yue admonished almost in unison.
Seeing the solemn expression on her parents' faces, Yue Lingshan was slightly stunned. "Why?" she asked.
"Meeting people like this? Are you out of your mind? Trouble will come looking for you if you do," Yue Buqun reproached.
"Why would trouble come looking for me just for a visit? I am not asking him to cure me. What's the big deal?" Yue Lingshan mumbled.
"We are here to enjoy visiting scenes, not to cause troubles." Yue Buqun pulled a long face.
Seeing how angry her father had become, Yue Lingshan dared not speak another word. But her curiosity toward this "Killer Doctor Ping One-Finger" only grew bigger and bigger.
At early morning the next day, the boat entered the city limits of Kaifeng. But it was still quite a distance from the real city.
"Guess what?" Yue Buqun smiled a big grin. "There's this place not far from here where a member of our Yue family once became the center of the limelight many years ago. We'd better pay a visit there."
"Yay! I know! I know! It's Zhuxian Town, where General Yue, Yue Pengju,[2] kicked Jin Wushu's[3] behind big time," Yue Lingshan cheered.
Yue Fei, who fought the Jin army and defended China, was a heroic figure all martial people admired deeply in their hearts, and Zhuxian Town was the place where Yue Fei had completely crushed the Jin army. Naturally, everyone in the group wanted to check it out.
"Hurry up! Let's go to the Zhuxian Town first. Then we'll have lunch inside the city of Kaifeng," Yue Lingshan leapt ash.o.r.e ahead of everyone else and shouted.
The pa.s.sengers started walking off the boat except Linghu Chong who remained sitting by the backside of the boat.
"Big apprentice brother, aren't you going?" Yue Lingshan asked.
Ever since Linghu Chong had lost all his inner energy, he often felt weary and tired and didn't want to move much. He figured that since everybody else was going ash.o.r.e to have fun, it would be the perfect opportunity for him to learn that "Song of Peace and Serenity." Besides, seeing how Lin Pingzhi stood side by side with Yue Lingshan, looking intimate and affectionate, he felt even more uncomfortable.
"I am too tired. I won't be able to keep up with you guys," he answered.
"Alright, have a good rest then. I'll get you some good wine from the city of Kaifeng," Yue Lingshan replied.
Sorrow swelled Linghu Chong's heart as he watched Yue Lingshan and Lin Pingzhi walk away abreast, leading the way ahead of everyone else.
"Even if learning the 'Song of Peace and Serenity' could really cure my internal wounds, why would I bother to cure and why would I bother to learn the music?" he thought to himself.
Staring at the muddy waves of the Yellow River surging east continuously, he suddenly felt that life's pain and suffering were really no different from the flowing river – both would come wave after wave and never stop. The thought triggered a disruption in his inner energy flow. An immense pain from his lower abdomen immediately consumed him.
Meanwhile, Yue Lingshan and Lin Pingzhi certainly were in a completely different mood. Walking side by side, whispering in each other's ears, the two were having a wonderful time.
"Lingshan and Pingzhi are both still young. A man and a woman walking together like this might be all right in the countryside, but it certainly wouldn't be appropriate in a big city. Why don't we give them some company?" Madam Yue gave her husband a pull on the sleeve and whispered.
"We are no longer young. I guess it would be totally appropriate for us to walk together then," Yue Buqun joked.
Madam Yue let out a smile and then caught up with Yue Lingshan in quick paces. The four of them asked their way from pedestrians and then headed straight toward the Zhuxian Town. Just when they were about to enter the Zhuxian Town, a big shrine by the roadside caught their attention. The sign on top of the shrine had four words in golden paint, "Shrine of General Yang."
"Dad, I know this one. This is the shrine for General Yang Zai-Xing. [4] He went to River Shang by mistake and was killed by the Jin archers," Yue Lingshan said.
"Correct! General Yang died defending his country. That is something that deserves great respect and admiration. Let's go in the shrine to pay our respects to the spirit of a martyr," Yue Buqun replied.
At the time, the many apprentices were still far behind, so the four of them decided to go inside without waiting for the rest of the group. A statue of Yang Zai-Xing occupied the middle of the shrine. The man in the statue had a white face and wore a set of silver-colored armor, looking very heroic.
"This General Yang is so handsome!" Yue Lingshan thought to herself. She couldn't help but turn around and cast a glance at Lin Pingzhi to compare Lin Pingzhi with the statue in her heart.
Suddenly a voice came from outside the shrine.
"I bet you this Shrine of General Yang is built for Yang Zai-Xing."
Recognizing the voice, both Yue Buqun and Madam Yue immediately grabbed onto the hilts of their swords and their faces turned pale.
Then another voice rose, "There are many generals named Yang. How can you be so sure that this is Yang Zai-Xing? Why can't he be Golden Blade Grandpa Yang,[5] or even Yang the Sixth[6] or Yang the Seventh?"[7]
"Just within the Yang Family Corp, there are many possibilities. It doesn't necessarily have to be Grandpa Yang, or Yang the Sixth, or Yang the Seventh. Who says it can't be Yang Zongbao[8] or Yang Wenguang?"[9] another voice argued.
"Why can't it be Yang the Fourth?" yet another voice joined the debate.
"Yang the Fourth surrendered to the foreign invader. No one's going to build a shrine for him," the previous one explained.
"Are you implying that I will surrender to the foreign invader because I am the fourth?" the other one mocked.
"Sure, you are the fourth. But what has that gotten anything to do with Yang the fourth?" the previous one argued.
"You are the fifth. Yang the Fifth ended up becoming a monk on Mount Wutai. Why aren't you a monk then?" the other one challenged.
"If I become a monk, you'll have to surrender to the foreign invader," the previous one responded.
Only after hearing the first sentence, Yue Buqun and Madam Yue had already figured out who they were – the bunch of Peach Valley's Freaks. Yue Buqun waved a signal; the four of them quickly hid behind the statue, the Yue couple on the left and Yue Lingshan and Lin Pingzhi on the right.
The bunch of Peach Valley's Freaks kept arguing outside of the shrine, yet neither of them would simply come in to get the answer. Yue Lingshan couldn't help but feel amused.
"What's there to argue about? Whether it was Yang Zai-Xing or Yang the Fourth, why not just come in here and take a look? Wouldn't that save a lot of trouble?" she thought to herself amusingly.
Madam Yue listened carefully and could only recognize five different voices. She figured that the sixth one must have died from her sword stab. The reason why she had left Mount Huashan with her husband was to stay away from those five freaks, afraid that they might go back for revenge. Who would have expected that they would meet right here? Even though the freaks hadn't spotted their group of four yet, the other apprentices could show up any minute, and they would have no way of escaping at all. Worries clouded her mind.
The debate among the five freaks became more and more heated, and finally one of them suggested, "Why don't we go inside and take a look. Then we'll see which stinking guy this shrine was built for."
The five of them all rushed in alongside, and one of them shouted excitedly.
"Aha, look here! It clearly says here 'Shrine of General Yang Sir Zai-Xing's Spirit.' This of course is Yang Zai-Xing." It was Branch Fairy.
Trunk Fairy scratched his head for a brief moment and then spoke, "It says 'Yang Sir Zai' here, not 'Yang Zai-Xing.' I see. This General Yang's first name is Sir Zai. Hmm, Yang Sir Zai, Yang Sir Zai, what a great name!"
"This obviously is Yang Zai-Xing. You are so full of it. Why are you saying that it's Yang Sir Zai?" Branch Fairy was infuriated.
"Read the words! It clearly says 'Yang Sir Zai', not 'Yang Zai-Xing'." Trunk Fairy argued.
"Then what do the words 'Xing's Spirit' stand for?" Root Fairy joined in.
"Xing means happy. [10] Xing's Spirit means the spirit is very happy. After this chap Yang Sir Zai died, people even built a shrine for him, of course his spirit is going to feel very happy," Leaf Fairy explained.
"Exactly! Exactly!" Trunk Fairy couldn't agree more.
"Didn't I say that the shrine was built for Yang the Seventh? I am right once again! Man, I am so smart!" Flower Fairy said contentedly.
"It is Yang Zai-Xing. How can it be Yang the Seventh?" Branch Fairy asked angrily.
"It is Yang Sir Zai. How can it be Yang the Seventh?" Trunk Fairy also asked angrily.
"Third brother, what's Yang Zai-Xing's ranking among his brothers?" Flower Fairy asked.
"I don't know." Branch Fairy shook his head.
"Yang Zai-Xing was the seventh child. He was Yang the Seventh," Flower Fairy claimed. "Second brother, what's Yang Sir Zai's ranking among his brothers?"
"I used to know. But I don't remember now," Trunk Fairy murmured.
"Well, I do remember. He was the seventh child also. That's why he was Yang the Seventh as well," Flower Fairy said with a big grin.
"If this statue is Yang Zai-Xing, then it can't be Yang Sir Zai. If it's Yang Sir Zai, then it can't be Yang Zai-Xing. How can it be both Yang Zai-Xing and Yang Sir Zai?" Root Fairy remarked.
"Big brother, think. What's the meaning of the word 'Zai?' 'Zai' means again, another one. This must be a statue for two, not just one. That's why it's both Yang Sir Zai and Yang Zai-Xing," Leaf Fairy explained.
"That sounds logical!" The other four Fairies all agreed.
"You say that if there's the word 'Zai' in one's name, that means one more, then it's obviously public knowledge that Yang the Seventh had seven sons!" Branch Fairy suddenly remarked.
"Following that logic, then if someone's name contained the word 'Thousand,' he will have to raise one thousand sons?" Root Fairy asked.
Hearing that the debate took such odd turns, Yue Lingshan almost broke into loud laughter. But she bit her lips hard and kept her silence.
The five Peach Valley's freaks argued some more when Branch Fairy suddenly blurted out, "Yang the Seventh! If you give blessings to our sixth brother and let him live, I am willing to kowtow to you. Actually, I am going to kowtow right now." He knelt down on the floor and kowtowed sincerely.
Hearing those words, Yue Buqun and Madam Yue exchanged a glance, each feeling somewhat relieved. Apparently that freak was still alive even though he took a severe stab from Madam Yue. Those Peach Valley's Six Fairies' behaviors were so hard to make sense of; the Yue couple would rather not make an enemy out of them.
"But what if sixth brother dies?" Branch Fairy asked.
"Then I'll smash this statue to bits and pieces and p.i.s.s on whatever is left of him," Trunk Fairy answered.
"Even if you smash the statue of Yang the Seventh into bits and pieces, and then p.i.s.s on it or even s.h.i.+t on it, so what? Sixth brother would be dead already, and your kowtow would all be wasted!" Flower Fairy reminded him.
"You are right! I better hold the kowtow for now. Let's go get a clear answer, whether sixth brother's wound is curable or not. If it's curable, we can come back to kowtow; if it's not, then we'll come here to p.i.s.s on him," Branch Fairy agreed.
"If it's curable, he will be cured whether we kowtow or not. There's no need to kowtow. If it's not, he won't be cured whether we p.i.s.s or not. We can skip p.i.s.sing," Root Fairy remarked.
"If sixth brother's wound is incurable, then we just skip p.i.s.sing? Aren't our bladder gonna explode if we skip p.i.s.sing? We could die!" Leaf Fairy asked.
Trunk Fairy suddenly broke into a loud cry. "If sixth brother won't survive this, we'll all stop taking a p.i.s.s, even if we'll all die because of that."
At those words, the rest four fairies also broke into loud cries.
"Wait a minute," Branch Fairy suddenly stopped crying and instead, burst into loud laughter. "If sixth brother can be cured, wouldn't we be just crying for nothing? Come on guys, let's get a clear answer first, and then we can cry later."
"What you just said doesn't make sense at all. If sixth brother can be cured, then why would we be crying later?" Flower Fairy disagreed.
Amid the non-stop arguing, the five men rushed out of the shrine in quick steps.
"Whether that man will survive or not is of great importance to us," Yue Buqun said to Madam Yue. "Let me go look into this. Junior apprentice sister, you, Lingshan, and the other apprentices can stay here and wait for me."
"You can't just go all by yourself. Let me go with you and watch your back," Madam Yue replied in a determined tone and then ran out of the shrine first.
In the past, when Yue Buqun had important matters to deal with, Madam Yue would always go with him to aid. Hearing what his wife had said, Yue Buqun knew that it would be impossible to change her mind, so he simply followed quietly.
After the two of them went out of the shrine, from a distance, they could see the Peach Valley's Five Freaks turn into a col from a small path. Following the five men quietly, they dared not stay too close and kept a good distance. Thanked to the loud and non-stop arguing from the five, it wasn't hard for them to shadow the freaks from a long distance behind.
Following the mountain path, after pa.s.sing by a dozen or so big willow trees, they came to a small creek. Several tile-roofed houses stood next by the creek. The arguing sound from the five freaks went straight into one of the houses.
"Let's circle around to the backside of the house," Yue Buqun suggested.
The couple ran toward their right using their Qing-Gong skills and circled back after about a quarter of a mile. A row of willow trees stood at the backside of the house. The two hid themselves behind the willow trees and listened.
Suddenly, the yelling voice of the Peach Valley's five freaks broke out abruptly.
"You just killed our sixth brother!"
"Why…why did you cut his chest open?"
"I am gonna kill you son of a b.i.t.c.h!"
"We'll cut your chest open too!"
"Oh, no! Sixth brother! You have died a horrible death! We…we'll never take a p.i.s.s again, even if our bladders explode."
Yue Buqun and Madam Yue were astonished. "Did someone just cut their sixth brother's chest open?"
After exchanging some gestures, the two of them crept next to the window and looked inside from a crack of the window.
About seven or eight lights lit the entire room and a large bed occupied the middle of the room. A naked man lay on the bed facing up, his chest cut wide open and blood gus.h.i.+ng everywhere. The man's eyes shut tightly as if he had been dead for sometime. His face showed clearly that he was none other than the Fruit Fairy who took a stab from Madam Yue on top of Mount Huashan. The remaining five Peach Valley Freaks stood around the bed, shouting and yelling hysterically at a short, stocky man.
The short, stocky man had a larger-than-average head. The spa.r.s.e mustache on his lips and the way he moved his head back and forth added much comical effect to his appearance. Both of his hands were covered with blood, the short dagger in his right hand also had blood dripping down from the tip of the blade. He stared at the five Peach Valley Freaks for a while and finally spoke.
"Are you done farting?"
"We are done. It's your turn now," the five freaks answered in unison.
"This half-dead man took a stab in the chest," the short, stocky guy replied. "You treated the wound with ointment and then carried him such a long way here so that I can save his life. But you were too slow. The wound had grown back together and all the nerves and internal pa.s.sages had grown back the wrong way. Just to save his life is easy. But since his nerves and internal messages are all messed up, he will not only lose all his Kung Fu, but also become paralyzed from waist down. Why would I want to create such a good-for-nothing?"
"A good-for-nothing is still better than a dead man," Root Fairy challenged.
"Humph, either I cure him completely or I don't touch him at all. How utterly embarra.s.sing it will be if I only make him into a good-for-nothing? Enough, enough! Now take this corpse and get out of here. I don't want to work on him no more! You guys are annoying me to death!" the short, stocky man snapped.
"You said we 'annoy you to death,' why aren't you dead yet?" Root Fairy asked.
"You have already annoyed me to death. Can't you tell? How do you know that I am not dead already?" the short, stocky man stared right into Root Fairy's eyes and answered in a chilly tone.
"If you are incapable of curing my sixth brother, why did you cut open his chest?" Trunk Fairy asked.
"What does my nickname say?" the short, stocky man asked coldly.
"Isn't your stinking nickname something like 'Killer Doctor'?" Trunk Fairy answered.
A chill went through the Yue Couple's bodies as they cast a glimpse at each other, both thinking the same thing, "Who would have thought that this odd looking short fatty turned out to be the world-renowned 'Killer Doctor?' That's right, it is said throughout the Martial World that this Ping One-Finger possesses the most excellent skills in healing and curing. It would only be natural that the five freaks took their seriously wounded brother to him for a cure."
Ping One-Finger's cold voice rose again. "Since my nickname is 'Killer Doctor,' what's such a big deal when I kill one or two?"
"What's so hard about killing somebody? Even I know how to do that. But you only know how to kill people, not how to cure people. You are not worth the part of the name where it says 'doctor'," Flower Fairy joined in.
"Who says I don't know how to cure people? I cut open this half-dead man's chest so that I can reconnect his nerves and internal pa.s.sages. After I am finished with him, both his internal and external Kung Fu skills will remain the same as if he was never wounded. Only that will show the true skills of the 'Killer Doctor'," Ping One-Finger replied.
The five Peach Valley Freaks were overjoyed at these words. "So you are capable of curing our sixth brother. We shouldn't have blamed you," they responded in unison.
"Why…why aren't you working on him? Sixth brother's chest has been cut open. He is bleeding terribly. If you don't hurry up, it will be too late," Root Fairy reminded him.
"Now are you the 'Killer Doctor' or am I the 'Killer Doctor'?" Ping One-Finger asked.
"Of course you are. What a dumb question that is!" Root Fairy answered.
"Very well! If I am, then how would you know whether it's too late or not?" Ping One-Finger retorted. "Besides, I was already working on him after I cut his chest open. But how can I get on with my work when five wordy creeps simply wouldn't shut up and leave me alone? Didn't I tell you to go have fun at the 'Shrine of General Yang' for a half-day and then also check out the 'Shrine of General Niu' and the 'Shrine of General Zhang?' Why have you come back so soon?"
"Hey, get on with your work. You are the wordy one now, not us," Trunk Fairy responded.
Ping One-Finger gave him a good stare for a moment, and then out of nowhere, he suddenly shouted out, "Get me the needle and the thread!"
The unexpected shout took the five Peach Valley's Fairies and the Yue couple by surprise; everyone's heart almost skipped a beat. A tall and thin woman walked in the room with a wooden basin in her hands. Quietly, she set the basin on the table. The woman was in her forties and had a square face with two big ears and a pair of sunken eyes. Her face looked pale and had little color in the cheeks.
"You want me to save this man here. I have already told you my rules, haven't I?" Ping One-Finger spoke again.
"Sure. And we have agreed to it and swore our oath already. No matter whom you want dead, just let us know. We promise that we won't disappoint you," Root Fairy answered.
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"Good," Ping One-Finger nodded. "I haven't thought of anyone that I want dead. I'll let you know once I decide. Now, all of you stand over there and shut your mouth up. If I hear anything from you, I swear that I'll give it up and not give a d.a.m.n about this man no more."
Ever since they were kids, the six Peach Valley brothers had always slept in the same room and eaten on the same table. They never stopped talking. Even in their dreams they kept on arguing back and forth. But now all they could do was to stare at each other, each had a stomach full of things he would love to spill out. When they thought that even a single word out of their mouth would get their sixth brother killed, each one of them bit his lips hard to fight the urge to talk, afraid of letting any sound out, not even a heavy breath or a fart.
Ping One-Finger picked up a big needle from the tray on the table. After threading in the thick, diaphanous thread, he quickly sewed Fruit Fairy's chest back together. His ten fingers were short and chunky, almost like ten carrots, yet they moved with ultimate efficiency and accuracy. Within moments, he had already sewed the over nine-inch long wound back together. Then he took many kinds of medicine, some powder, some liquid, from the many china bottles behind him and applied them to the wound. Next, he pried Fruit Fairy's mouth open and poured some different kinds of liquid down the throat before wiping the blood off Fruit Fairy's body with a wet cloth. The tall and thin woman helped by the side, sometimes handing over the medicines, sometimes holding the needle for him, appearing to be very proficient.
Ping One-Finger glimpsed at the five Peach Valley's Fairies. Seeing that all five of them had already opened their mouths and were in a rush to begin talking, he said, "This man hasn't come back to life yet. You can begin talking after he comes back to life." With their mouths still open, the five freaks' faces froze instantly with a totally awkward look. Ping One-Finger let out a snort and then sat down by the side. The woman took the needle, thread, dagger and the rest of the stuff out of the room.
Hiding outside of the window, Yue Buqun and Madam Yue held their breaths. At the moment it was completely silent inside the room, so any little sound from outside of the window would, for sure, catch the attention of the people inside the room.
After a long while, Ping One-Finger stood up and walked by Fruit Fairy. All of a sudden, he struck out with his palm and smacked heavily on the "Bai-Hui" point on Fruit Fairy's head. "Ah!" six men shouted out in shock. Out of the six men, five were the Peach Valley's Five Fairies, and the sixth one was actually the man lying on bed who had been unconscious all the time – Fruit Fairy.
Right after the cry, Fruit Fairy sat straight up and scolded, "G.o.d d.a.m.n it! What the h.e.l.l did you hit my head for?"
"G.o.d d.a.m.n it! If I didn't drill open your Bai-Hui point with my inner energy, would you have recovered so quickly?" Ping One-Finger scolded back.
"G.o.d d.a.m.n it! Quick or slow, my recovery is none of your business!" Fruit Fairy rebuffed.
"G.o.d d.a.m.n it! If your recovery were slow, how would people know the brilliance of the Killer Doctor's skills? And wouldn't it be annoying to have you sleep in my room any longer than necessary?" Ping One-Finger replied.
"G.o.d d.a.m.n it! Are you saying that I am annoying you? I am getting out of here. You think I care about you?" Fruit Fairy mocked. As soon as he said those words, he rolled out of bed and headed out.
The other five Peach Valley Freaks had not expected him to recover so quickly and were able to walk out just like he said he would. In great shock and joy, they all followed him out of the door.
Completely shocked and terrified, the Yue couple all came to the same conclusion, "That Ping One-Finger's medical skills are indeed astonis.h.i.+ng. Besides, his inner strength is nothing ordinary, either. When he smacked the Bai-Hui point on Fruit Fairy's head, he must have injected vigorous inner energy into Fruit Fairy's body to wake him up instantly." Within the moment of hesitation, the Peach Valley's Six Fairies had gone far away.
Ping One-Finger stood up and then walked into another room. Yue Buqun gave his wife a signal, and the two quietly sneaked away. Not until they were hundreds of feet away from the room did they speed up their steps.
"That Killer Doctor's inner strength is simply extraordinary. But his behavior was indeed very unusual," Madam Yue exclaimed.
"Since the Peach Valley's Six Freaks are around, the city of Kaifeng has gotten to be a place of trouble. We'd better leave here at once. There's no need for us to get tangled up with them," Yue Buqun suggested.
Madam Yue answered with a hum. Throughout her life, only the last several months had given her the most grievances. Even her husband, the Head Master of the Huashan Sword School, a member school of the Five Mountains Sword Alliance, had to run around in hiding. And it almost felt as if there was nowhere safe no matter where they went. The couple had never kept anything from each other, but every time when this topic came up, both of them would immediately change topic to avoid the embarra.s.sment. Now when they finally knew that Fruit Fairy would live on, both felt great relief as if a big rock had been removed from their hearts.
The two of them went straight back to the "Shrine of General Yang" and found Yue Lingshan, Lin Pingzhi, Lao Denuo, and the rest of the apprentices waiting at the back hall.
"Let's get back to the boat," Yue Buqun ordered.
By then everybody had become aware that the Peach Valley's Five Freaks were close by, so neither questioned the order and all returned to the boat in a hurry. Just when they were going to ask the boatman to set sail, the Peach Valley's Five Fairies' loud shouts suddenly came from ash.o.r.e.
"Linghu Chong! Linghu Chong! Where are you?"
All faces of the Huashan Sword School members changed color as they watched six men rus.h.i.+ng toward the wharf in trots. Besides the Peach Valley's Five Fairies, there was also Ping One-Finger among the group. The Peach Valley's Five Fairies had seen the Yue Buqun couple before, so when they recognized Yue couple's faces from afar, all cheered uncontrollably. Within seconds, they had arrived and immediately all five of them leapt toward the boat.
Instantly Madam Yue unsheathed her sword and stabbed it forward toward Root Fairy's chest. At the exact same time, Yue Buqun also drew his sword and pushed Madam Yue's blade down using that of his own.
"Don't be reckless!" he whispered.
The bow of the boat sunk slightly when the Peach Valley's Five Fairies boarded the boat.
"Linghu Chong! Where are you hiding? Why don't you come out?" Root Fairy yelled loudly.
"Why should I hide? Am I afraid of you?" Linghu Chong roared in fury.
Right at the moment, the boat b.u.mped slightly and another person had leapt aboard – the "Killer Doctor" Ping One-Finger.
Yue Buqun felt a great shock inward. "The minute junior apprentice sister and I got back this dwarf shows up right here. Could we have left any traces when we sneaked about outside of his window? Could he have found the traces? The Peach Valley's Five Freaks alone are already hard enough to deal with, not mentioning adding such a tough opponent on top of that. Alas, perhaps our lives are destined to end here at Kaifeng today." Then he heard Ping One-Finger speak.
"May I ask which one of you is brother Linghu?"
Surprisingly, his words were quite polite.
"I am Linghu Chong. May I have your respectful name? May I ask what I can do for you?" Linghu Chong slowly walked onto the bow of the boat and answered.
Ping One-Finger looked Linghu Chong up and down. "Someone has asked me to treat your wounds," he said.
Reaching out and grabbing Linghu Chong by his hand, he placed his index finger on top of Linghu Chong's wrist and began checking his pulses. Suddenly, he raised his eyebrows and uttered a cry of surprise. But soon his eyebrows gradually knitted into a straight line and another cry of surprise followed. Raising his head high, he stared into the sky blankly, his left hand scratching his head madly.
"How odd! How odd!" he murmured to himself.
A long while pa.s.sed before he reached out again to check Linghu Chong's pulse from the other wrist. But as soon as his index finger touched Linghu Chong's wrist, he sneezed all of a sudden.
"This is so weird. I've never seen anything like this before," he muttered.
Root Fairy could no longer hold his tongue and jumped in. "What's so odd about it? It's so obvious that he was wounded in his Heart Pa.s.sage. I have already treated him with my inner energy."
"Why are you still insisting on saying that he was wounded in his Heart Pa.s.sage? Obviously he had problems with his Lung Pa.s.sage. If it weren't I who opened his many pressure points along the Lung Pa.s.sage, you think he'd still be alive today?" Trunk Fairy immediately rebuffed.
Wasting no time, Branch Fairy, Leaf Fairy and Flower Fairy all jumped into the big debate, each claiming himself the only one that gave the right and critical treatment and the one who should get the credits.
Ping One-Finger suddenly gave a loud shout, "What c.r.a.p!"
"Hey! Are you talking c.r.a.p, or are we, the five brothers, talking c.r.a.p?" Root Fairy mocked angrily.
"Of course you are!" Ping One-Finger answered. "Inside brother Linghu's body, there are two streams of stronger energy flow, which seemed to have come from Monk No Commandment. There are also six streams of weaker energy flow, which probably came from you guys, you six fools!"
Yue Buqun and Madam Yue shot a glance at each other, both thinking, "This Ping One-Finger is indeed incredible. It's not hard to detect the eight streams of energy flow inside Chong from his pulse, but it is completely amazing that he is able to identify the origin of the different energy streams and knew two of them came from Monk No Commandment."
"Why are you saying that our six energy streams are weaker and the G.o.d-d.a.m.ned No Commandment's energy streams are stronger? There's no doubt that ours are stronger and his are weaker!" Trunk Fairy snubbed furiously.
"What a nerve!" Ping One-Finger sneered. "He was only one, yet his two energy streams overwhelmed all the energy streams of the six of you combined. How the h.e.l.l could yours be stronger, huh? Monk No Commandment the old sc.u.mbag, he has outstanding Kung Fu skills yet no brain! G.o.d d.a.m.n it! What an idiot!"
Flower Fairy stuck his finger out and pretended to also check Linghu Chong's pulse. "Well," he said, "it seems that the energy streams of the Peach Valley's Six Fairies are actually in total control and have completely overwhelmed Monk No Commandment's…." Suddenly he cried out in pain and pulled his finger back quickly as if somebody has bitten it. "Ouch! G.o.d d.a.m.n it!" he shouted.
Looking very pleased, Ping One-Finger burst into loud laughter. Everybody could tell that he must have pa.s.sed his advanced inner energy through Linghu Chong's body and gave Flower Fairy a painful shock.
After some more laughing, Ping One-Finger put the solemn face back on.
"Listen up, all of you! Go wait in the boat's hold and be quiet! I don't want hear a word out of you!"
"Wait a minute! What makes you think we'd do exactly what you tell us to do?" Leaf Fairy protested.
"Didn't you swear an oath that you would kill a person for me?" Ping One-Finger asked.
"That's right! But we only agreed to kill a person for you. We never agreed to follow your orders?" Branch Fairy answered.
"It's totally up to you whether you want to follow my orders or not. But what if I ask you to kill the Fruit Fairy of the Peach Valley's Six Fairies? What do you think?" Ping One-Finger sneered.
The Five Fairies all shouted out in protests. "That's outrageous! You have just cured him. Why are you asking us to kill him?"
"Well, what kind of oath did you five swear to me?" Ping One-Finger asked.
"We agreed that if you can cure our brother Fruit Fairy, then when you order us to kill a person, regardless of who that person is, we must do it. No excuses, whatsoever," Root Fairy replied.
"That's correct!" Ping One-Finger nodded. "Now did I cure your brother?"
"Yes, you did!" Flower Fairy concurred.
"Is Fruit Fairy a person?" Ping One-Finger pressed on.
"Of course he is a person. He is no ghost," Leaf Fairy answered.
"Fine. I want you to kill a person for me, and this person is Fruit Fairy!" Ping One-Finger concluded.
The five Fairies looked at each other in blank dismay. All felt that this order was unspeakably queer, yet neither of them could think of any argument.
"If you are not willing to kill Fruit Fairy, I am sure we can work something out. Now will you follow my orders? I am telling you to go sit in the boat's hold and behave yourselves. I don't want any movement or any word out of you," Ping One-Finger commanded.
The five Fairies hurriedly acknowledged the order, and within seconds, all five of them sat down in the hold, their hands on their knees and their backs straight up, making sure that no one could have behaved any better than them.
"Master Ping, I heard that you have this rule when you treat your patients: after you've cured the patient, he will have to kill someone for you. Is that true?" Linghu Chong asked.
"That's correct! I do have this rule," Ping One-Finger admitted.
"But I don't want to kill anyone for you, so please save your trouble and don't treat me," Linghu Chong exclaimed.
"Huh!" Ping One-Finger uttered a cry of surprise. He looked Linghu Chong up and down as if he had seen something totally eccentric and abnormal. After a long pause, he spoke again.
"Firstly, your case is too severe and I can't cure you; secondly, even if I could cure you, someone else has already agreed to kill for me. You don't have to worry about it at all."
Ever since Yue Lingshan had s.h.i.+fted her love interests to someone else, Linghu Chong had lost the joy of life. But when he heard from this famous doctor, who had such a great reputation with his capability of bringing the dying back to life, that even he couldn't cure the wounds, Linghu Chong still found himself swept by utter desolation.
The Yue couple gave each other a stare, both thinking, "Who has gotten such great due respect that could have made 'Killer Doctor' to make house calls? What kind of relations.h.i.+p does he have with Chong?"
"Brother Linghu," Ping One-Finger spoke again. "There are eight streams of foreign energy forces inside your body that could not be discharged, nor dissolved, nor tamed, nor overpowered, which have caused all the injuries and suffering. I was entrusted the task to cure your wounds. It's not that I am holding any effort back from you. Because your injuries are related to inner energy, that's why medicine and medical treatments won't do you any good. Ever since I became a doctor, I've never seen any injuries like this. Alas, there's really nothing I can do. I am so ashamed."
He took a china bottle out from his chest pocket and then poured ten vermilion pills into his palm.
"These are ten 'Heart-Soothing' pills. They contain many kinds of precious medicinal materials and took me a long time to make. Take one pill every ten days and you will be able to live for another one hundred days."
"Many thanks!" Linghu Chong took the pills respectfully.
Ping One-Finger turned around and headed toward the bank. But suddenly he turned back again. "There are two more pills in the bottle. I might as well give all of them to you." He took out the china bottle and handed it out.
But Linghu Chong didn't take it. "I can tell that senior master really treasure these pills very much. They must contain great healing power. It's probably better to keep them with you to save someone else in the future. Even if I could live ten days or twenty days longer, it's not gonna do anybody, even I myself, any good."
Ping One-Finger threw a sideways glance at Linghu Chong for a moment and then murmured, "Having no regards of one's own life, you do show the qualities of a true man. No wonder! No wonder! Alas, what a pity! I am sorry!"
He shook his giant head, turned around, leapt off the boat, and then walked off in big strides. He came and went so abruptly and completely ignored Yue Buqun, the Head Master of the Huashan Sword School. Yue Buqun was greatly annoyed. But there were still five menaces sitting in the boat's hold. Getting rid of them was not going to be an easy task.
The five Fairies all sat absolutely still, their eyes looking down, their hands on their knees, as if they were monks meditating in trance. If Yue Buqun ordered the boat to start sail, then the five menaces would have, for sure, been brought along. If he didn't order the boat to start sail, then n.o.body knew how long they were going to just sit there, or if they were going to jump up suddenly to attack in retaliation for the stab Madam Yue gave Fruit Fairy. Lao Denuo, Yue Lingshan, and some more apprentices had seen with their own eyes the horrible scene how the Fairies had ripped Cheng Buyou into pieces. Even now, each of them could still feel chills on their back from the fear. They simply gazed at each other in dismay, and neither was even brave enough to cast a glance at those five.
"Hey, what are you doing here?" Linghu Chong came back into the hold.
"We are just sitting here and behaving ourselves. We are not doing anything," Root Fairy answered.
"We are about to start sail. You can go back ash.o.r.e now," Linghu Chong urged.
"Ping One-Finger told us to sit in the hold and behave ourselves, no talks and no movements. Otherwise, he is gonna ask us to kill our brother. That's why we are sitting here behaving ourselves and dare not talk or move," Branch Fairy replied.
Linghu Chong couldn't help but grin at these words. "Doctor Ping has gone ash.o.r.e already. You can start talking and moving now!"
"No way! No way! What if he sees us talking and moving about? That's not going to be good!" Flower Fairy shook his head frantically.
Suddenly a croaky voice floated from ash.o.r.e, "Hey, you five ugly goblins! Where are you?"
"I think he's calling us," Root Fairy suggested.
"Why do you think he's calling us? Are we ugly goblins?" Branch Fairy argued.
The voice shouted again, "I have one more ugly goblin here. Doctor Ping has just cured him. Do you want him or not? If you don't want him, I am gonna drop him in the river to feed the fish."
Hearing those, the five Fairies instantly leapt out of the hold side by side and landed ash.o.r.e. The middle-aged woman who had helped Ping One-Finger with the operation stood by the river straight as a ramrod. With her left arm extended to the side, she lifted a stretcher in her left hand, and Fruit Fairy lay on the stretcher. The woman looked ill from her face yet had great strength. To lift the over one hundred pounds Fruit Fairy plus the wooden stretcher using only one arm seemed so easy for her.
"Of course we want him. Why would we not want him?" Root Fairy said hurriedly.
"Why are you calling us ugly goblins?" Branch Fairy asked.
"Look at yourself, you look more like an ugly goblin yourself," Fruit Fairy said while lying on the stretcher.
It turned out that after Ping One-Finger had sewed Fruit Fairy's wound back together, fed him some miraculous medicine, and then smacked his head to inject advanced inner energy, he immediately stood up and walked out. But due to the loss of great amount of blood, he fainted again after only a short distance and was brought back into the room by the middle-aged woman. Even though he was still far from recovering, his wounds didn't keep him from yielding to anyone orally, and he simply couldn't help but contradict the woman.
"Do you know what Doctor Ping fears the most in his life?" the woman asked coldly.
"We don't know. What does he fear the most?" the six Fairies replied in unison.
"He fears his wife!" the woman answered.
The Smiling, Proud Wanderer 26 Chapter Fourteen: Wine Cups Part 1
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The Smiling, Proud Wanderer 26 Chapter Fourteen: Wine Cups Part 1 summary
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