My Perfect Lady 118 I Think He Loves Her... Still

They finished up a whole bottle fifteen minutes later.

Jim was barely able to stand, whereas Miya's head buzzed. She was half sprawled on the table with her head down, while barely remaining seated on the chair in front of Jimmy. They shouldn't have drunk up the alcohol neat, she told herself listlessly.

Jim, on the other hand, had begun to stare grudgingly at the water.

"Do you think it will turn green?" he asked her the fifth time and with a lot of annoyance, "If I pour this bottle into the river?"

"P-Pool," Miya reminded him weakly again, "It – It's a pool."

"B-But… Okay. Will it turn green?"

"Nope."

Miya struggled to keep her thoughts coherent when she raised her head and concentrated on Jim. The act hurt her brain, almost as if someone was drilling through her skull from all four sides. She hadn't been this drunk in ages. But thanks to that, she had somehow found the courage to question the young master further.

"She didn't say anything to you?" Her voice was a dark mumble.

The thought had been haunting her since before.

Jim looked away from the water, and stared at her in confusion.

"What?"

Miya frowned as well. Was she asking correctly?

She focussed again.

"I m-mean, didn't Zaila s-say anything to you? The last time she was awake… only, 'where's mom'?"

Jim shook his head.

"Nothing. Just that."

"What happened then? Did y-your mom – Mrs. Hunter return?"

"I haven't seen her since then."

"T-Then could she be…?"

"No… she's alive."

Miya's head hurt again, and her heart hurt even more. She didn't like this side of Jimmy Hunter at all, this persistent being who was talking to her like dead meat. No, dead meat didn't talk…

How did the saying go?

She couldn't remember. And she never forgot her sayings!

d.a.m.n.

"Didn't you try to find her?"

"Why should I?"

"And the Chairman? Did he –"

"I never asked."

Miya sighed. She was ready to slump down on the table once more, when Jim took in a deep breath and began to speak again. Miya sat up as straight as she could, and listened alertly.

"M-Mom became a buried topic after that. Mom and Zaila both," Jim was looking directly into her eyes now, "F-Father never forgave me for my slip up that night. And I couldn't f-forgive him for not doing anything about my mother."

"What slip up, Jimmy?" Miya was afraid.

"I slept when she ran off and slipped from the stairs. Had I been more careful, Zaila wouldn't have been able to step out of the room, Miya."

"It wasn't your fault."

"Who else? I was b.l.o.o.d.y sixteen. And I let the girl die."

"It wasn't your fault."

"It was. But it was Simon Hunter's too. I warned him about Zaila and his woman getting too close. I told him to do something about it. He didn't."

Miya flinched at Jimmy's words, at the name of the Chairman that slipped from the young man's tongue. His voice had held poison.

"Everything went downhill from then," he said bitterly, "We didn't speak about it. I wanted to apologize to Chairman. Park says he was sorry too. But… I don't know. We never said it. It was like admitting she was gone. Then one night, we both lashed out at each other.

From then on, the Chairman and I haven't been able to survive in the same room. E-Except for business, of course."

Miya swallowed.

She looked into Jim's eyes, at the desperation and the detached sorrow in them. They were a strange shade of grey and brown. The grey resembled a lot of the Chairman's own eyes.

She couldn't believe it.

Had these two men never thought that neither of them was to be blamed for Zaila?

"I feel scared sometimes, Miya."

Miya involuntarily held his hand, that he had kept lazily on the table.

"L-Like when you were telling me of Tao. I-I had the same feeling from back then. When Zaila was at the hospital, and nothing was under control. I-I couldn't control what happened to you too. I c-couldn't protect you from Thad Carver as well. What if –"

Jim's words took her by surprise.

What?

Was that why he had been so furious with her, the night she had tackled Carver alone?

"Jimmy," Miya began in a rush, grabbing his fist in both her hands hurriedly, "You don't have to worry about me. I'm very strong."

"No! You're not strong, you're violent. Even foolish at times."

"No, I –"

"You even promised you would give me a heads up, every time you were about to fight."

"Yes, that's why I left a blood trail. I –"

"A BLOOD trail!"

"Y-Yes, it's the most logical –"

Miya saw that Jim had begun to get out of his seat rather threateningly, and somehow, the focus of the conversation had s.h.i.+fted entirely on her.

"Look, I am sorry!" she blurted out, standing up too.

Jimmy frowned.

"Why?"

"Because I was supposed to give you a heads up…?"

"Yes, I remember. Good."

Jimmy was confused again, so he sat back down and began to open the second absinthe bottle with one hand. The other, he let it stay in the missus's hold. She too had sat back in relief, and was still holding his hand in hers.

"You know," Jim said again, "That's why I hate it when someone targets kids. I wish I would find them all and bury them deep inside the ground." He tapped the floor with his foot.

Miya nodded.

"My father was s.h.i.+pping girls. I wish I was the one who had burnt him, Jimmy."

"I wish that too."

Jim had succeeded in unsealing the bottle. With one hand he poured out a gla.s.s for each, clinked them again, and gobbled his own down in one go.

Miya followed suit.

"Was that why you saved Ben?"

"Ben?"

"Yes. When Manny was about to shoot him."

Jim stayed quiet.

That was his fault too. It was because of him that Miya's son would have been shot that night. It seemed like he was a master at making mistakes when it came to children.

"I'm a horrible man," he sulked.

"You're not," Miya said quietly.

They remained silent for a brief second, listening to the rippling of the waves. Her head had stopped working properly. He wasn't sure of his words too. Nevertheless, Jimmy shrugged noisily.

"Why do you pay for Tao's bills?" he asked her, suddenly recalling the detail, "Why do you let him stay alive?"

Miya hadn't expected that. Focussing, she muttered, "Because he can't die. Not yet. Not until he gets up and looks me in the eye once, and tells me why he made my life h.e.l.l."

Jimmy looked at her intently.

Then slowly, his face spread into a bright smile. He chuckled deeply too.

"It's stupid, how similar we are," he then sighed.

"What?"

"I-I want that from Eshni too, Miya. To look me in the eye, and tell me why she screwed us all up."

"Eshni?"

"My mother."

"Then why don't you look for her?"

"Because of the Chairman."

"The Chairman?"

"I think he loves her… still."

"Does he?"

"I think… yes."

Miya looked at him incredulously, while Jim sighed again.

He began to pour another gla.s.s.