Sweet Liar Part 13

In her sleep she relaxed against him, her trust of him complete and absolute. It was this trust that was beginning to drive him insane. For the life of him, Mike couldnat figure out why she wouldnat go to bed with him. Head asked every question he could think of, investigating her past under a microscope, doing what he could to find answers, to make her talk to him. From the way she reacted when he touched her, head have thought she was raped when she was a child or some other traumatic thing had happened to her so that now she couldnat bear a man to touch her.

But Samantha allowed Mike to touch her. Brother! did she allow him to touch her! Hand holding, snuggling, kissing, cuddling together on the couch, she seemed to want to touch him every minute of every day. He was sure that if it were up to her she could perfectly well sleep in the same bed with him every night and not even be tempted to go any further than sleeping in each otheras arms.

He had fantasiesa"awake or asleep he had fantasies about making love to hera"but his major fantasy was about persuading her that s.e.x wasnat so bad. He thought about kissing her until she was limp, then gradually going further, but Sam always seemed to read his mind; when s.e.x was his intent, she pushed him away.

Now he was finding that his patience was nearly at an end, for he was beginning to feel that his love for her wasnat going to be returned. From talking to her father and from what Samantha had told him Mike knew that her ex-husband was very different from him, and maybe thatas what she needed: a different kind of man. Maybe she could only respond to men like her ex and not men like Mike. Maybe she needed some CPA-type guy: structured, formal, tidyaboring.

Maybe, he thought, and his gut twisted at the idea, maybe she thought of him as a afriend.a Sometimes women had stupid notions that a s.e.xually healthy man and woman could be platonic friends without the acomplicationsa of s.e.x. Maybe thatas what Sam thought about him, thought that they could remain living together in this house as roommates.

Both of these theories had many holes in them, such as why she was so d.a.m.ned jealous of any other woman he so much as glanced at and why she looked at him as though he were a combination of Apollo, Conan the Barbarian, and Merlin. It was an easy guess that a tenant didnat usually look at her landlord with eyes that made him seem as though he could do anything, accomplish anything, become anything.

So why the h.e.l.l wouldnat she go to bed with him?

At midnight, he picked her up and took her into the bedroom, carrying her as she clung to him as though she were a nine-year-old and he her father. When he put her on the bed, she smiled at him in her sleep. Now what was he supposed to do? Put her jammies on her?

aSamantha,a he said, aIad like to be one of those altruistic, storybook heroes who can undress the heroine without jumping on her bones, but I canat. Youall have to undress yourself and put on your own nightgown. I want to make love to you too much to be able to even look at your bare body and still be able to control myself. I just might turn into that rapist youave always thought I was.a By the end of this speech, her eyes were wide open as she looked up at him standing over her. aMike, thanka"a But head shut the door sharply before she could say the words head come to hate.

23.

I n the morning, Samantha sensed that Mike was different the moment she walked into the breakfast room where he was seated and looking at the newspaper. He didnat put down his paper and smile at her as he usually did, didnat wink at her as he often did. Instead, he kept the paper in front of him, reaching out for his coffee cup without looking up. When she said good morning, he still didnat look at her.

For a moment she thought he might be angry at her because shead once again imposed on him, but head been so very nice to her last night. Of course Mike was always nice, always kindaalways the most wonderful human being on the face of the earth, she thought.

Moving to stand behind him, she put her hand on his shoulder. aMike, about last nighta"a she began, then to her astonishment, he moved away from her touch. He did not want her to touch him!

Samantha was so stunned by his movement that she had to leave the room. When she returned later, dressed for the day, she hoped she had her facial expression under control. With all the years shead spent living with her ex-husband, acting, pretending every moment, shouldnat she be good at acting by now?

He was still sitting at the table, still hidden behind the newspaper. aMike, about last night,a she said, this time without touching him. aI didnat mean to impose on you. I didnat mean to ask more of you than youave already given, and, about the money for the furniture, you donat have to lend it to me anda"a aSamantha,a he said firmly, aI donat want to hear it. Money is the least of my problems and as soon as I get dressed, weall go buy Maxie some furniture. We need to get out of the house anyway because my sister is going to be here today and I donat want to be in her way.a With that he left the room, without so much as turning to look at her.

It was a strained day. Usually they talked so much that they tended to talk over the top of each other, but today, there seemed to be nothing to say. Mike did just as head promised and took her to Newellas where she saw floor after floor of heavenly antiques, and he took her to the Antiques Mart where they went to shop after shop, but she wasnat having very much fun. Doing her best to think of Maxie and not herself, she bought a couple of pretty bed jackets, a bottle of perfume, and even some earrings, but she could think of little else except that Mike was angry with her.

The worst part of the day was when Mike jumped away from her if she got too close to him, as though he couldnat stand for her to touch him. By the afternoon, Samantha was weary with it all, weary with what was happening now, weary with her memory of the past, for her ex-husband had done the same thing to her. In the beginning of their marriage they had held hands and kissed and had enjoyed touching, but after the first few months he couldnat seem to bear her touching him. Now it was turning out to be the same with Mike. But it was a great deal more understandable with Richard, because shead been to bed with him. Go to bed with Samantha Elliot, she thought, and be turned off s.e.x with her forever.

By late afternoon she was so nervous that when she accidentally touched Mikeas hand, she jumped. aIam sorry,a she said. aI didnat mean to touch you. I know you donat want me to touch you. I didnat meana"a Turning toward her, Mike said, aOh, Sam, you donat understand at all, do you?a Pulling her into an empty corridor of the Antiques Mart, he drew her into his arms and kissed her sweetly, longingly, her body pinned between the wall and his big, warm torso.

When he drew his lips away from hers, she put her head on his shoulder, her heart beating wildly. aI thought you hated me. I thoughta"a He didnat want to hear what she thought, nor did he want to talk about what was bothering him, he didnat want to have to put it into words. aIam taking you to Blairas and leaving you there because I have to go out tonight and you canat return to the house.a All she could do was nod, so glad that he was again looking at her.

In the taxi he was silent and she wished head tell her what was bothering him, but no matter what questions she asked, she couldnat get him to talk. At Blairas apartment building, he practically dropped her at the curb, waiting only to see that she got inside under the care of the doorman.

aYou look as though you could use a drink,a Blair said as soon as Samantha was inside her apartment, which was small and neat and furnished with comfortable, modern furniture. aYou and Mike have a fight?a aIaI think so,a she began as she took a seat on Blairas couch. aBut, actually, no, we didnat.a Looking at Blair, her face showed her distress. aI donat know whatas wrong, but Mikeas angry at me and I donat know why.a as.e.x,a Blair said quickly. aWith men at this early stage of courts.h.i.+p itas always s.e.x. They think of nothing else.a Taking the gin and tonic Blair held out to her, Samantha grimaced. aIt couldnat be s.e.x because there isnat any.a For a moment Blair didnat understand what Samantha was saying, then she laughed. aPoor Mike. Iall bet this is a surprise to him. Since he was a teenager I doubt if any female heas wanted has taken longer than twenty-four hours to fall into bed with hima"and that includes high school.a aIf he fell into bed with me, head never want to see me again,a Samantha said heavily.

Blair had been trained as a physician, but right now her experience as a woman was of more use to her, and she could see that something was wrong with Samantha. Viewed from a distance, it was odd that Samantha and Mike werenat spending every minute of every day in bed together, since shead never seen two people more enraptured with each other. Seeing the two of them together was enough to nauseate a healthy individual. They laughed uproariously at each otheras slightest witticisms, got nervous when one left the other alone in a room, making weak excuses to follow. They looked at each other with eyes so big and drippy theyad make a c.o.c.ker spanielas eyes seem cruel.

As far as Blair could tell, since Samantha had moved into Mikeas house, the two of them hadnat been more than a few feet apart from each other, except for the day Samantha had gone out with Raine and Mike had followed them and been hit over the head with a rock by a pa.s.sing strangera"a story which Blair didnat believe for a second.

Last night Raine had come by her apartment and told her about driving Mike and Samantha to see Samas grandmother. Raine had had a good laugh about how besotted his cousin was and said he looked as though head walk across fire if Samantha wanted him toa"or if he thought it would impress her. aI hope to h.e.l.l I never fall as hard as Mikeas fallen,a Raine had said. aI think Mike would have gone after me with a shotgun if Iad so much as touched the hem of her skirt, which I wouldnat mind doing given the legs under that skirt. I do rather envy him his nights.a Now Blair was hearing that Sam and Mike had never gone to bed together. It was rather like finding out that Romeo and Juliet had been faking their love for each other.

aWhere did Mike go tonight?a Blair asked.

aTo find out more about my grandmother,a Samantha answered and explained a bit about the note. aHe doesnat want me to go with him because Iam not suitable for a bar. You know what he said about me? He said that I have an old mind in a young body. He thinks Iamathat Iam the motherly sort, the little church girl. Iall bet Vanessa went to bars with him.a aWhat do you know about Vanessa?a aWhat do you know about Vanessa?a Blair laughed. aDid you know that Vanessa slept with other men while she was going out with Mike and that Mike knew about it and didnat care?a A bit stunned by that news, Samantha blinked a couple of times. aSince Mike is the most jealous man in the world, thatas a little difficult to believe. Heas jealous of Raine and this city and everything that I like that isnat him. Sometimes I think heas even jealous of computers.a aWell, he wasnat jealous with Vanessa. She was a showpiece and she was there when Mike wanted her and left him alone when he didnat want to be bothered. But then, itas my opinion that Vanessa would have done anything Mike wanted, because she liked his money more than she liked him.a aIs Mike wealthy?a aYes.a Blair was pretending that her attention was on her drink, but actually, she was watching Samantha intently.

aBut Raine said all the Taggerts were poor.a aCompared to the Montgomerys, they are. Mike inherited around ten million on his twenty-first birthday, and by now, with his skills at investing, I wouldnat be surprised if head tripled the amount.a With a big sigh, Samantha finished her drink. aI was beginning to think that was the case.a Blair laughed at her tone because she sounded as though shead been told Mike had some great, unchangeable flaw. aMikeas money isnat a tragedy, you know. It gives him a lot of freedom.a aFreedom to have any woman in the world,a she said heavily. Blair nearly laughed again. Mike wasnat the only victim of the green-eyed monster. aI think Mike isaisaa aYou donat have to tell anybody what you think of Mike; itas in your eyes for everyone to see.a aI wish it were on my body,a she muttered, then looked up at Blair sharply. aYou know what Iad like to do?a aWhat?a aLook like a s.l.u.t.a aWhat!?a Blair nearly choked on her drink.

aI think maybe I have some talent as an actress. I put on a dress my grandmother had worn in the twenties and I sort of, well, turned into her. Actually, I was an altogether different person. I sang an old blues song for Mike and I think he was a little shocked, and, truthfully, maybe I was too. Anyway, I wish I could put on a minuscule outfit and high heels and go to this bar and pick up Mike. I couldnat do that as myself, but maybe if I were another person, dressed as another person, I would have some courage. Iam not sure what Iad do with him once Iad picked him up, buta"a aI have every confidence that my overs.e.xed cousin will help you figure out something to do with him. You know, I might have a few pieces of clothing that could be just what youare looking for. How does red lycra sound?a aLike a leotard.a aThis is much smaller than a leotard. In fact, Iave seen finger bandages larger than the skirt I have in mind.a aIt sounds perfect. Could I see it?a aSure. Iall get a magnifying gla.s.s and weall start searching in my closet.a Laughing together, the women headed for Blairas bedroom.

aWould you look at that?a Nelson said, cigarette smoke curling about his head.

Mike didnat turn to look at what had to be the fiftieth girl this creep had declared to be the most sensational creature on earth. Taking a drink of his third beer, Mike leaned toward the skinny little man. aYou planning to tell me what you know in this century or not?a He was sounding belligerent now because he was feeling belligerent. For two hours head been here in this sleazy bar trying to buy, sweet talk, bully, whatever he could think to do, information from this old alky. So far, head had no luck, and he was beginning to think that the anonymous note-writer at Jubileeas had been lying when head hinted that Nelson knew anything.

aSheas buying a pack of cigarettes now,a Nelson said, his eyes to the right.

Pulling another fifty from his pocket, Mike slipped it across the table. aThatas the last of it. You donat tell me anything after this, Iam leaving.a aKeep your s.h.i.+rt on, muscle-boy. Canat you spend a little time with a guy whoas down on his luck?a Nelson was one of those people who had been born down on his luck. No doubt head found something wrong in his childhood, his mother spoke too sharply to him or some such, and now he used it as an excuse to wallow in grief and spend his life in bars cadging drinks. He was little, thin, dirty, and weasly looking, and he felt the world owed him a life.

aI guess you got better things to do than sit here with the likes of me.a His voice was a self-pitying whine. aMaybe you got somebody at home waiting for you.a The implication was that Nelson didnat have anyone and thatas why he was so unhappy and had to drink and make those marks shooting whatever it was into the inside of his arm.

aYeah, I got somebody,a Mike said, and thought of Samantha, of the pure cleanliness of her, and right now he very much wanted to be at home with her. Jeanne should be finished with her apartment by now, and Mike wanted to show it to Sam, to see her face when she saw it. Maybe, when she saw the rooms, shead be so happy that shead turn to him, throw her arms around him, head kiss her, thena"

Nelson was snapping his fingers in front of Mikeas face. aYou leavina me, boy? My G.o.d, but I think sheas comina this way. You gotta see her. Real Cla.s.sy. And a body like Iave never seen before.a At one time Mike might have been interested in seeing this woman, at least in looking, if in nothing else, but he wasnat interested in anything that patronized this dive.

aOne of you boys have a light?a came a deep, sultry voice from Mikeas left. With a grimace, he picked up a book of matches from the ashtray, struck one, and turned to light the womanas cigarette.

What he saw made him freeze. Samantha, sweet, perfect, innocent little Samantha, was dressed in a red-sequined tank top that was cut so low in the front that he could see nearly all of her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, and she wore a tight red skirt that, as far as he could tell, covered nothing whatsoever. All eight or so feet of her legs were showing beneath the askirt.a When she bent forward, he could see the deep, exquisite cleavage made by her large, round, beautiful b.r.e.a.s.t.sa"the same cleavage that all the b.u.ms in this place could see. Samantha put her hand over Mikeas to hold the tip of the cigarette to the match flame. Lighting it, she stood, her hips thrust out, and looked down at him, fluttering her lashes a bit. aMind if I sit down?a Too intent on gawking at her to pay attention to the flame, Mike dropped the match when it burned down to his fingertips.

aSit by me, baby,a Nelson said eagerly. aYouare new in here, arenat you? Who you work for?a Holding the cigarette between her two fingers, her elbow resting on her hip, Samantha looked down at Mike. aYou going to invite me to sit down or not?a aIam going to kill you,a he said under his breath, but he moved over on the seat so she could sit by him.

When she was seated she tried to take a draw on the cigarette, but since shead never smoked in her life, she gave a couple of very unseductresslike coughs.

Angrily, Mike took the cigarette from her. aJust what do you think youare playing at?a He started to stub the cigarette out in the ashtray, but on second thought, he put it to his lips and took a very deep draw, a draw that burned the cigarette halfway down to his lips.

aMike, I didnat know you smoked.a aI donat,a he said tightly, letting out the smoke slowly. aI quit two years ago, but then thereas a lot you donat know about me. A few more weeks around you and I may take up drinking.a aDitto,a she said, looking him in the eyes.

aMike,a Nelson said, alooks like you two know each other. You wanta introduce me or you gonna keep her all night? You canat keep her all night, can you?a aYou hear that, Samantha? Nelson thinks youare a prost.i.tute.a Leaning toward Mike, she let her lips come near his. aAnd what do you think I am?a she practically purred.

aAll show,a he said, drinking the last of his beer. aLetas get out of here.a Samantha was not going to leave yet. If she went home with him now, nothing would have changed. For whatever reason he was angry at her, he was still angry. Signaling the waitress to come to the table, she ordered a double shot of tequila gold. aAnd a quartered lime and a Dos Equis if you have it, and do you have some salsa and chips?a Before Mike could say another word, a man came to the table and asked Samantha to dance with him. aIad love to,a she said, starting to get up, but Mike put his hand on her shoulder, holding her on the seat. aI guess not,a Samantha said to the man apologetically.

When her drinks came, she turned to Nelson. aSo what do you know about my grandmother? I a.s.sume you are Nelson, arenat you?a Well aware of Mikeas eyes on her, Samantha knew that he realized she had to have looked inside his wallet to have seen the note.

aNot as much as Iad like to know about you, baby,a Nelson answered in what was meant to be a provocative manner.

Mike was still looking at Samantha, waiting for her to turn to him, but she didnat. Instead, with all the ostentation, all the s.e.xiness she could manage, she made a fist of her left hand, slowly licked the web of it, poured salt on the wet place, sensually licked the salt away, then l.u.s.tily tossed back the tequila in one shot, after which she juicily bit into a lime wedge.

aLord help us,a Nelson whispered, but Mike didnat say a word, just kept looking at her profile.

Picking up a chip, she reached out to the bowl of salsa.

aCareful of that!a Nelson warned. aPaddyas stuff is lava.a Samantha scooped a lot of the salsa on the chip and ate it while Nelson watched in awe. aIn Santa Fe wead feed this to the babies,a she drawled as she drank some of the dark brown Mexican beer. aLet me give you some advice, Nelson. If someone in Santa Fe warns you that something is hot, be careful, but if a New Yorker says itas hot, laugh.a aThatas enough,a Mike said, grabbing her upper arm and pulling her out of the bench. Leading her onto the dance floor, he surrounded her in his arms and began a slow dance. aWhat are you trying to do? Out-macho the guys? If thatas your goal, youave done it.a Rubbing her hips against his, a very serious look on her rather heavily made up face, Samantha said, aDo you think Nelson is the type of person who really cares about the South American rain forests?a aWhatas wrong with you? And who gave you that getup you have on?a aDonat you like it?a aNot on you.a aWant to take it off?a Holding her at armas length, he looked into her eyes aHow much have you had to drink?a aNot much.a She put her head back down on his shoulder. aMike, why have you been angry at me today?a Her words made him soften, or maybe it was the feel of her in his arms, with her hips moving with his, her b.r.e.a.s.t.s rubbing against his chest, or maybe it was the sight of her in this outfit that wouldnat have adequately covered a three-year-old, but he couldnat remember why head been angry at her. aAhhh, sweetheart.a She seemed to melt into him further. aYou havenat called me anything but Samantha all day. No Sam-Sam or anything else.a aYouare killing me, you know that? Youare driving me insane. I think we ought to talk about where we stand with each other.a aIsnat that what the female is supposed to say? Then youare supposed to say that you donat want to commit, then I saya"a aWhy donat you shut up?a He was becoming involved in the slow undulations of the dance now, his hands moving up and down her back, fingers edging down over her b.u.t.tocks. For all that either of them were aware of the other people in the bar, they may as well have been alone.

aDo you have any idea how much I want you?a aI feel some of it right now.a aDonat laugh at me, Samantha.a aOh, Mike, Iam sorry, itas just thataa aWhat?a he said rather sharply. aWhat is it? Tell me!a Pulling away from him, she went back to the table, downed the last of her beer, and turned to leave. It had been a mistake dressing up like a tart and trying to entice Mike, because under the s.e.xy clothes, she was still plain ola Samantha Elliot, not a femme fatale. She may have been able to turn herself into a chanteuse while wearing Maxieas clothes, but even Blairas micromini couldnat make her unafraid of s.e.x, unafraid of ruining everything she had with Mike.

As she turned away from the table, Nelson shoved a piece of paper at her that contained a name and a telephone number. aCall Walden,a he said. aHe can tell you lots about Maxie.a Taking the paper, shoving it into her braa"where it itcheda"she nodded and turned away.

Mike caught her elbow. aYouare not going without me.a He didnat say another word as he pulled her outside.

But Mike had other ways of communicating besides words. One minute they were standing on the curb waiting for a taxi and the next Mike had pulled her into the alley beside the bar, his arms going about her as he hungrily began kissing her neck. After the first moment of his pa.s.sion, Samantha tried to move away from him. When Mike didnat seem to understand that she didnat want him to touch her, she had to use force to push away.

Mike, utterly and absolutely frustrated, as well as confused, leaned back against the brick of the building wall, his hands raised above his head, palms out, as though he were nailed to the wall. aWhy?a he asked. aWhy, Sam? What is it that you have against me? Was that husband of yours so great in bed that you want to enshrine him? You canat think of another man besides him?a At that Samantha laughed, and Mike, his face full of anger at thinking she was laughing at him, started to move away from the wall, but Samantha leaned toward him. Shead had too much to drink, first at Blairas apartment and now here, and her slightly inebriated state made her dare to do things that she would not do otherwise.

Almost as though to tease her, his s.h.i.+rt was open halfway to his waist, and now she put her hands inside it, touching his skin. Mike was angry, seriously angry, she knew that, and he didnat respond to her touch, but kept his hands against the wall as he watched her.

aYou donat understand, Mike,a she said softly.

aThen why donat you explain it to me.a There was no softness in his voice.

Since shead first met him, Samanthaad had a nearly uncontrollable desire to touch him. Now, sliding her hands inside his s.h.i.+rt, she felt the sculptured muscle across his chest. Some women looked at the bodybuilders on TV or on a beach and thought they were too muscular, but not Samantha. When she was in Santa Fe and leading her aerobics cla.s.ses, there were times when the men in the free-weight side of the room so distracted her that she missed her rhythm. One evening a man named Tim, who had performed in bodybuilding compet.i.tions, was squatting five hundred pounds. With two men at either end of the bar, which bowed under the weight of the plates, Tim did a deep knee bend with the full five hundred pounds. After head completed his squat, the women in Samanthaas cla.s.s had burst into laughter, because Samantha had been so engrossed in Tim that shead forgotten to lead the exercises. Embarra.s.sed, Samantha had given her attention back to the women.

Now, she was touching one of those muscled men, one of those G.o.dlike creatures who looked as though he could lift buildings with his hands.

aHow much do you squat, Mike?a she whispered.

aSix fifty,a he answered, having no idea why she should ask something like that now. His friends, the ones whoad been to college, pretended that Mikeas power lifting didnat exist. Their att.i.tude was, Mikeas got a brain in spite of the fact that heas got some muscle.

aBench press?a She was running her hands over his chest, around toward his back, feeling his lats, the muscles that made his back so very wide, made it curve.

Mike didnat move from the wall, nor did he make any motion to touch her, for he didnat want to scare her away. If his acquiescence was what she needed to get her to touch him, then he would remain in one position if it killed him. aFour fifty,a he answered.

His s.h.i.+rt was old and soft and the b.u.t.tonholes were loose, and when she touched the b.u.t.tons, they slipped out of the holes, opening the s.h.i.+rt to his waist. Samanthaas hands slipped lower, down to his stomach, his hard, rippled stomach.

aDead lift?a she whispered, meaning the lift where he picked up a weight from the floor to his waist.

aSeven hundred. Strength has to do with bone density and the bones of the people in my family are a bit more dense than the average Joeas. Look, Sam, if you want statsa"a She kept rubbing her hands over his skin. How long had it been since she had really touched a man? For that matter, had she ever really touched one? She had certainly never wanted to touch one as much as she had wanted to touch Mike since the first day shead looked into his dark eyes, since shead first felt his lips next to her own. aI want to explain to you.a aYeah, well, Iam listening.a His voice was ragged, as though he were under great strain, but he still had his hands up, away from her. Had anyone seen them, they would have seen what looked to be a man being held at gunpoint by a woman.

aItas me, not you. Donat you understand that? At first I was afraid of you.a Her hands were at his waist, moving toward his back, moving over all that muscle that had not an ounce of fat over it. aWell, maybe not afraid, but I didnat want anything to do with another man.a aYouave made that abundantly clear. Sam, you want to say what you have to say? I donat know how much more of this I can stand.a aI donat want to ruin what we have between us.a Sliding her hands up his chest to his shoulders, she moved down over the tops of his arms. In another minute she would have the s.h.i.+rt completely off him. His skin felt so very good, so warm, so smooth, so strong, skin that was tightly draped over yards of heavy muscle. She would have liked to put her lips to his skin, to taste it. Was it salty from the sweat of dancing?

aWhat do we have between us?a His voice was harsh, strained, and he closed his eyes for a moment. All his life girls had been easy for him, but the girl head most wanted, Sam, seemed to be impossible. She made him think appalling thoughts of taking her out on a lonely road and forcing her, but he knew head never be able to live with himself afterwarda"but, more importantly, neither would she.

aAll the sweetness,a she said. aWe have kindness and talk and friends.h.i.+p. We laugh together. Do things together. Wea"a Abruptly, Mike moved his hands down from the wall and put them on her shoulders as he looked into her eyes, searching them. aYou think all that will end if we go to bed together?a She liked him when he stood still and allowed her to touch him, but she wasnat drunk enough to not know the truth. aMike, if you went to bed with me, it would end,a she said in disgust. aIam rotten at s.e.x.a For a moment Mike stood still, not at first understanding what shead just said, then the first bud of enlightenment came to him. aYeah, I bet you are,a he said softly, then slipped her arm through his. aToo bad they donat have a piece of software to teach s.e.x, then you could learn all the right moves and positions.a For the first time in a week he felt good because he understood now, knew what her problem wasa"but, best of all, he knew how to fix the problem. Never in his life, through many years of mathematics, had he looked forward to a solution more than he did now.

Leading her toward the street, he put up his hand for a cab.

Samantha giggled. aThatas a great idea, Mike. Who can we get to write the software program?a When a taxi stopped, Mike opened the door for her. aI might have some ideas of what could be put in your software.a aDo you, Mike? What research books did you read?a aI made up my own positions,a he said companionably. aMy own positions, my own motions, even my own feelings. Iave never read one book on s.e.x.a As Samantha got into the cab, she moved to the far side of the seat. aI have. Iave read many, many books on the subject.a aOh? And who asked you to read these books?a aRichard. He said they might help me.a Turning, she looked at him in the dim light from the streets, but his face was turned away. He was staring straight ahead, as though he didnat want to look at her. aDo you understand now?a aYes,a he said softly. aI now understand everything.a He didnat say another word to her on the ride back uptown to his town house, and with every click of the cab meter, Samantha grew more depressed. She shouldnat have told him. What was that saying? Better to allow people to think youare a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt. Well, shead opened her mouth and told Mike about her s.e.x life. Head said she was all show and she was. She could dress the part of a woman of the night, but she didnat know how to act the part.

By the time they reached the house, she was planning what shead say to Mike, that shead move out in the morninga"that is, if he didnat want her to leave tonighta"and she was sorry shead cost him so much in time and money and inconvenience.

Very calmly Mike paid the driver, unlocked the front door, allowed her to go inside, then locked the door behind them.

aMike,a she began, ready to recite the little speech shead prepared, but Mike didnat give her a chance, for he began to stalk hera"stalking being the only way to describe the stealthy, predatory way he moved toward her. aMike? Are you all right?a aAll this time I thought it was men you didnat like. There were times when I thought the problem was me, that I turned you off, but you never turned away from me when I touched youa"unless I seemed to want more.a aOf course not.a Backing up, she moved toward the living room. aMike, you frighten me when you look at me like that.a aLike h.e.l.l I do. Iam not sure anything frightens you. You arenat afraid of me, not in the normal sense, anyway.a He narrowed his eyes at her. aYouare afraid men wonat like you.a Samantha could feel herself turning red from the tip of her toes to her hairline. Maybe in the red dress he wouldnat notice the color of her skin. aYou are the most stupid man,a she said, trying to sound nonchalant, trying to make it sound as though she were in control. aJust because I turn down your advances you start to play psychologist and decide that I think men donat like me. Ha!a aYou donat just turn me down, you turn down all men.a aIad rather be safe thana"a She stopped talking because she was now up against the east wall of the living room.

Standing very close in front of her and not allowing her to get around him, Mike leaned closer. aWhy did you divorce your husband?a aI hardly think thatas any of your business.a When she tried to move away from him, he put one hand on the wall on each side of her head.

aWhy, Sam?a aItas nota"a aMaybe itas not any of my business, but youare going to tell me anyway.a aIncompatibility,a she said quickly, but was not able to meet his eyes.

aYouare a bad liar.a aUnlike you. You can liea"a aWhy, Sam?a aHeaa aHe what?a aHe had another woman!a she flared at him.

aThen he was a fool,a Mike said softly. aWhy would he want another woman when he could have you?a She looked away from him, but there was grat.i.tude for his words in her eyes. aIave told you, so please move your hands.a aYes, Iall move my hands,a he answered as he grabbed her into his arms and began kissing her. Using all her strength, she tried to get away from him, but he held her to him. aWhat happened to you, Sam?a aLeave me alone, please,a she whispered, not looking at him.

aDid you turn to him in the night, but he wanted nothing to do with you?a As he spoke, she still struggled against him. aThe b.a.s.t.a.r.d. He was all worn out from someone else, wasnat he?a Ceasing her struggles, she glared up at him. aYes. Yes, yes, yes. Is that what you wanted to hear? He slept with her twice a day, but he never touched me. Me, the s.e.xless one. Iam the cook, the cleaner, the little money-maker, but Iam nota"a When she couldnat continue, Mike kissed her. aNo, please let me go.a aWhy should I let you go?a aBecause I donat wanta"a aDonat want to make love with me? Like h.e.l.l you donat. Youave wanted me from the first day we met, but youave acted as though you hated me. I didnata"a His words were silenced as his hands roamed over her body, over her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, down her thighs, her throat, her arms, between her legs. But Samantha stood still, rigid, unmoving, willing herself not to respond to him.

aHow long can you hold out against me, Sam? If I do this?a Bending his head, he kissed the top of her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, and it was no difficult matter to pull the stretchy fabric down over one breast as he gently took the peak in his mouth. aOr this?a Moving his mouth downward, he caressed her breast with his thumb.

aPleaseaa she whispered, eyes closed, head back against the wall.

aPlease what? Tell me what you want. Iall do anything you want, anything.a aThen let me go.a aAnything but that.a His lips moved down her body, down to her waist, then back up to her face while his hand moved under her top, his long fingers on the skin of her stomach. aPlease, Sam. Donat hold back.a aI canat.a Kissing her ear, one hand on her breast, the other inching up her thigh, his hand slowly moved up under her skirt. aWhat do you want? Tell me. Gentle? Sweet?a Suddenly, he pulled away from her and looked at her face, at her closed eyes, at the expression of control she was wearing, as though she was determined to contain herself.

aNo,a he said. aYou want what I want: Sam, I need you.a At that he grabbed the front of her panty hose and pulled at the same time that he somehow managed to unfasten his trousers and drop them to the floor.

It was at the feel of Mikeas hands on her bare flesh that made Samas years of pent-up desire come to the surface. One moment she was standing still, unresponsive, self-contained, and the next her hands and mouth seemed to be everywhere on him, tasting his skin, licking, sucking, clawing.

For just a moment, he was startled by her, startled by her sheer hunger, then his mouth was on hers, his hands grabbing at her, responding to her with the same need that she was exhibiting.

Abruptly, Samantha stopped moving as a sense of dj vu overtook her. Looking up at Mike, she half expected him to be Richard and to be wearing that bored look, that half-asleep look, that Richard had always worn when they were in bed together. But he wasnat her ex-husband, this man was Michael, and the expression on his face was of desire and longing and need andacaring, caring that she receive as well as give. He looked like she felt.

Understanding her thoughts, Mike said, aItas me, Michael Taggert,a as he grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled her head back to apply his teeth and lips to her throat. aAnd Iam a different man.a When he picked her up to set her down on his manhood, Samantha nearly cried out, but she wrapped her legs about his waist, locked her ankles, and hung on as he pounded into her, her back against the wall. Stroke after deep, deep stroke, she held on, her nails biting into the skin of his back, her mouth sucking on whatever part of him she could reach.

When he finished and gave her one last thrust before limply collapsing against her, his head on her shoulder, she almost screamed in frustration, but she kept her noises to herself and hugged him to her.

Pulling away from her, Mike looked into her face as though searching for an answer. aSorry, baby, I wanted you too much. The next one is yours.a Although she had absolutely no idea what he meant, she liked it when he kicked his trousers off and carried her up to the bedroom to stand her by the side of the bed. She liked it when he undressed her and kissed her b.r.e.a.s.t.s. When he removed his s.h.i.+rt and held her, skin to skin, he kept looking at her, as though he expected something from her.

At last, frustrated because she had no idea what he wanted, she said, aMichael, I donat know what to do. I donat know how.a aBaby, there is no how. Thereas no right or wrong, except maybe making your partner feel bad.a aI donat want to displease you. I wanta"a Very gently, he kissed her breast. aYou like that?a aYes. Yes, very much.a aTell me if I do something you donat like.a Kissing her all the while, he ran his hands over her thighs, but he still seemed to want answers that she didnat have. aBut I like all of it,a she said at last.

Halting, hands on her hips, Mike looked at her in disbelief. aYouare afraid youall do something to me that I wonat like?a His incredulousness sounded in his voice. aOkay, try me. Start touching, start kissing. Whatever you want to do to me, you may. Iam yours.a Anyone else might have laughed at his words, but not Sam. Years of Richard saying, aNot there. Men donat like to be touched there.a Or, aThatas not the way to touch a man, donat you know anything? Most women your age know this stuff. Why donat you?a had made her wary. Her ex-husband had made her shy and uncertain from years of trying to remember his rules.

aIaI guess I would like to touch you.a When Mike just stood there staring at her, she said, aIs that all right?a Mike kissed her softly. aAnd people doubt if thereas a heaven. There is and itas here in this room. Iam yours, baby.a Holding her hand while she remained standing, he stretched out on the bed, but Samantha couldnat look at him. The front of him was tooatoo intimate, too private, and his eyes kept watching her. Seeming to read her mind, he turned over, face down, so she could look at him in comfort.

Tentatively reaching out, she ran her hand over his shoulder. There was one dim lamp on in the room, and it made Mikeas honey-colored skin glow. With his face turned away from her she could look at him to her heartas content, look at and touch the full, long, nude, muscular length of him.

He was the most perfectly formed man shead ever imagined. He was movie stars, men in underwear commercials, guys at the gym, the construction worker in the red T-s.h.i.+rt whoad whistled at her but shead pretended she hadnat heard; he was the men in three-piece suits whose brains were as s.e.xy as their bodies; he was lazy, insolent seventeen-year-old boys whose muscles bulged out of their clothes, rodeo stars, and those smooth-cheeked, eyegla.s.sed men who held their children tenderly. He was all of them.

Running her hands over his body while he lay still, so still he might have been asleep, she began to kiss the back of him. When her lips had kissed him from the nape of his neck to the soles of his feet, she straddled his legs and began rubbing her hair over his skin. Stretching out on top of him so she could feel her b.r.e.a.s.t.s on his skin, she fit her torso into the hills and valleys of his body.

Somewhere along the way she stopped thinking about him as a person, even about whether she pleased him or not, and began to think only of herself. Remembering seeing that soft bit of skin where his legs joined his b.u.t.tocks, that hairless, enticing little patch that shead once seen in the mirror when head walked away from her, she hadnat realized then that shead wanted to kiss that bit of skin. So now she did kiss it: kissed it, sucked on it, ran her tongue over it while Michael lay absolutely still.