Brite and Fair Part 10

he has been acking nummer than a deef mewt and mother sed i dont know what it is. he has done his ch.o.a.rs better than i ever gnew him to do them xcept jest befoar crismas and 4th of July and he eets well but he dont play enny moar and he dont seam like himself enny moar. then father he sed i dont like it.

i hoap he isnt going to be a lollypop or a goody good boy. if there is ennything i hait in this wirld it is a miss Nancy sort of boy.

Aunt Sarah she up and sed i gess you needent wurry about any boy of yours being a miss Nancy, George Shute, and father laffed and sed well it dont seam as if i ever cood have a boy like that but you cant be sure. as far as i know there aint enny ministers in my family sence the pilgrim fathers landed on the wild New Ingland sh.o.a.r. then Aunt Sarah she sed peraps it would have been better if they had been a few and father he sed that may be so but i dout it. then father he sed it aint natural for a boy to set round like a sick hen. either he is thinking up sum deviltry or he is getting to be a lollipop and of the 2 things i ruther it wood be the ferst.

then mother sed i dont quite agree with you George. i dont like a miss Nancy enny moar than you do but i dont beleeve it is nessary for a boy to be thinking up deviltry to be a real boy. then father he sed i gess you was never a boy Joey or you woodent say that. A boy is going to raise tune or he aint a boy and you mite as well put him into skerts to onct. i never gnew a puppy to grow up into a good dog unless he chewed up slippers and spoilt moar things than he was wirth. then mother sed that depends on what you call a good dog. if you meen a dog whitch is all the time fiting that is one thing but if you meen a real good dog that is another thing. then father he sed i woodent give a cent for a dog that cant fite. a G.o.d dog that is groan up dont care to fite but will if he has to. and a good man dont cair to but will if he has to. they is a difference between a good boy and a goody good boy. i wood ruther my boy wood git into scraips than not. if he dont i know sumthing is rong with him.

then mother she sed if you like to have him get into scraips why do you get so mad with him and lick him, only mother she sed punnish him, when he gets into scraips and father sed dont you see i cant aprove of his scraips for if i did he wood be in scraips all the time and he wood be if he gnew what i was saying. then father began to laff and to tell what he and Gim Melcher and Bill Yung and Beanys father and Pewts father done when they was boys and he asted if all of them fellers wasent pretty good men and Aunt Sarah sed none of them is mutch to brag of and father laffed and sed that shows you aint a good judge of caracter.

i tell you when i herd what father sed i maid up my mind that i wood maik up with Beany and Pewt and we wood show father and Pewts father and Beanys father that we was jest as lifely as they was when they was boys. then i tell you i felt beter than i had felt for a long while and i am going to bed.

to-morrow i will maik up with Pewt and Beany.

October 11, 186---brite and fair. today i maid up with Pewt and Beany. it wasent near so hard as i thought it wood be. i gess boath of them missed me two but not as mutch as i missed them becaus they had the other fellers. this afternoon we got up a club whitch we call the Terrible 3. i am the president becaus i got it up. Pewt is the secritery becaus he can wright so good and Beany is the tresurer becaus it dont cost ennything to get in and he aint got enny money to taik cair of. the objeck of the club is to do tuf things and not get found out. i aint got time to wright enny moar about it tonite becaus we aint had a reglar meating of the club yet. we are going to have one tomorrow after chirch and wright out a consecration and bi laws. after we have did this things is going to be ifely round here.

October 12, 186---brite and fair. it is jest raning leeves today. i went to chirch and to sunday school. Beany sed he was going to raise time in chirch so as to lose his gob. he sed a feller whitch was going to be tresurer of the Terible 3 hadent augt to have a chirch gob, but me and Pewt told him he must kep his gob becaus if he wasent going to get caugt when we done tuf things we must be respecktable befoar folks. we told Beany that if he rased time two mutch and a feller hapened to get his windows broak he wood say we fellers done it and then peraps we cood lie out of it and peraps we coodent. so Beany he desided to behaive and to keep his gob, and he done well and only let the wind out of the organ 1 time and that was when he was looking at a rooster fite in old man Elliots yard throug the window, and of coa.r.s.e when there is a rooster fite or a dog fite or enny kind of a fite a feller has jest got to look at it. the only thing that maid it funier than time was becaus they had got a woman from out of town to sing in the quire and she was singing

the voice of one criing in the wilderniss

and jest then the organ went eooowaugh and sounded like when you step on 40 cats tales to onct and stoped and then begun again and we cood hear Beany pumping as fast as he cood and the old bellose maid a noise just like the braiks on a fire ingine, like this, chunka, chunka, chunka, and everybody laffed and the woman set down mad and woodent sing eny moar.

Chipper and old Hen Dow jawed Beany like time after chirch. Beany he told them why he done it but they dident seam to think that was enny xcuse and kep on jawing him. Chipper he sed he has stood moar from Beany than he had from enny feller and that a house of wors.h.i.+p wasent a place for munky s.h.i.+nes and this was the last chanct Beany shood have. so Beany kep his gob but he has a narow escaip and will have to be moar cairful nex time.

well after sunday school we met in Beanys barn and rote out the consecration and bi laws. it is a old peeler. i had borrowed sum bi laws of a club father usted to be in and i had rote down a lot of things to put in and Pewt coppied them after we had talked them over becaus Pewt can wright so good. This is what he rote.

Consecration and bi laws of the Terrible 3.

we Pewt and Beany and Plupy do hearbi asosiate ourselfs together under the corperat naim of the Terible 3.

artickle 1. the object of this asosiasion is to brake windows, to plug green apples and ripe tomatose and roten cuc.u.mbers at peeple we dont like or whitch wares there best close on a weak day, or whitch feels two big for his britches. to get even with fellers and with peeple whitch has done rong to us in the past or in the future. wether we have to do it with slingshots or roten egs.

resolvd that the use of slingshots and roten egs is only to be used when enny unusuel or crool rong has been did us. and when the punishment must be sevear.

artickle 2. the main objeck of the members is not to get cougt and evry feller whitch is a member must agree never to betray enny other feller if he gets cougt himself and is licked to maik him tell. and enny feller whitch does tell on another member will be maid to eet a live toad and 4 angel wirms. it is no xcuse if he does it under terible tortures sutch as shaking hands with a pensil between your fingers or putting musterd on your tung or licking you with a bed slot in whitch tacts has been put.

artickle 3. the offisers of the asosiation shall be a president a secritary and a tresurer. the duty of the president shall be to call the meatings of the asosiation. the duty of the secritary shall be to wright down what is did at the meatings. the duty of the treasurer is to take cair of the money of the a.s.sociation.

artickle 4. it dont cost ennything to get into the asosiation. the Terrible 3 is good frends and will stand by eech other as long as live remanes and no money makes anny diference. n.o.body elce can get in but the Terible 3 at enny prise what ever.

artickle 5. steeling is absolootly forbiddon. this aplise to money, gewils, hens, roosters and chickings, dogs, horses and cattle and ennything whitch peeple has in there houses and barns, but does not apli to apples, pares straberries and frutes in their seeson befoar they has been pictd and put in the house or barn and nothing in this consecration shall be considered as hendering enny one of the Terible 3 from pluging ennything at cats dogs or other animals.

artickle 6. at the end of the asosiasion whitch will come when enny of the members is ded or in jale the propity of the asosiasion shall be divided equil between sutch of the members as aint ded or in jale and the records of the asosiation if there is enny shall be birnt and distroid.

bi laws

I. evry member shall be reddy to fite for another member at a moments notise.

II. evry member shall be reddy to lie for another member when ever he can help him by liing. if he can help him by teling the trooth he will be xpected to do so if he can.

III. if a feller gets cougt he is xpected to lay it on to sum feller whitch is likely to do them things whitch he is cougt for doing.

IV. the fellers whitch is most likely to do the things whitch a feller is most likely to get cougt for doing is Fatty Gilman, Skinny Bruce, Tady Fenton, Jack Melvin, Whack, Pozzy and Bug Chadwick, Fatty Melcher, Pop Clark, Hiram Mingo, Ben Rundlett, Ed Tole and several others.

V. evry member has go to commit them naims to memory and keep them at his tungs end becaus he mite need them at enny time.

VI. as far as posiable members must keep out of enny trubble with wimmen. the Terible 3 does not wage war against wimmen. of coa.r.s.e when a woman has got a husband whitch the Terible 3 has ennything agenst she must taik her chanct but she wont be hirt if she keeps her fingers out of the pye.

i have never knew a woman to do that in our lifes.

it aint our falt that she is his wife. she done it herself.

VII. as far as posiable the Terible 3 will try to keep out of trubble in school. it aint that we are scart of old Francis but it seams sumtimes as if he had got eys in the back of his hed and gnew evrything a feller thinks befoar he thinks it.

then we all sined. we was going to have 3 or 4 more bi laws but we dident know enny moar roman numbers and you have got to have figger numbers for the artickles and roman numbers for the bi laws.

after we had sined it i thougt we cood have got them from the clock. we dident think of that.

after we had sined it Pewt gave it to me to keep as i am the president. he sed he had augt to keep them becaus he is secritary but i told him that artickle 3 of the consecration sed the duty of the secretary was to wright what was did at the meatings and dident say he was to keep the paper. so Pewt give in.

Oct. 13, 186---brite and fair. the secritary of the Terible 3 got licked in school today becaus he sed geogrify is the sience of numbers and the art of compewting by them. he told old Francis he wasent thinking and old Francis he give him a licking to maik him think. tonite the Terible 3 comited our ferst crime. this is the way we done it. we agread to be studding our lessons at 8 oh clock. when it struck 8 we wood go out for a drink or sumthing and meat on Elm strete jest behine Pewts and Beanys house. Pewt and Beany had got a pile of ripe tomatose. then we would ding old William Hobbs door bell and when he come to the door we wood paist him. He always drives us out of his yard so we done it. when it struck 8 oh clock i sed i forgot to shet up my hens and a skunk may come round. Keene sed i will help you. i sed no i will do it. what would you do if we met a skunk. so i went down and hipered over to Elm Strete. Pewt and Beany was there with their hands full of tomatose.

Pewt tiptode up and rung the bell. in a minit old Hobbs come to the door with a candle shaded with his hand. as soon as he come out we let ding as hard as we cood eech one 3 or 4 tomatose.

one nocked the candle out of his hand and put it out. one hit him square in the mouth and squashed. 2 or 3 hit him in other places and the rest squashed on the house. i wish you cood herd him spitt and sware and holler. jest as soon as we pluged him we started running towards front strete and then went behine the Unitarial chirch throug a hole in Fifields fense into Beanys yard. i wasent away from the house more than 3 minits. when i came in mother sed did you shet the door to the hen coop and i sed yes. i did shet it becaus i thought she mite ast me.

in about half an hour old man Hobbs rung our door bell and asted mother where i was. she sed do you want to see him and he sed where has he been tonite and she sed he has been in studdying all the evening ever sence supper and he sed are you sure and she sed why yes i have been here myself.

then he sed well sum boys came to my house and rung my door bell and when i come to the door they threw roten vegitables at me and asaulted me and if i can find out ther edent.i.tty i am going to persecute them to the xtent of the law and send them to jale.

mother she sed it is a shaim and i certainly hoap you will find out who they are and i am very glad to say that my son had nothing to do iwth it and i am sure he wood not do ennything of the kind.

so old Hobbs he went away and mother came in and told us. she sed he hadent quite got all of the tomatose out of his wiskers but she hoped he wood ketch them. i hoap so two over the left. it may lern old Hobbs a lesson if he isent two old to learn.

i am afrade he is.

October 14, 186---i have got 2 horks. Potter Goram give them to me. they is full groan and verry hansum. one is a hen hork and the other a red taled hork. gess what i naimed them. one is Hork and the other Spitt. mother sed those were dredful naims but i think they are prety good ones. i feed them on meat and fishes and rats and mice. if you poak them with a stick they grab it with his claus and hiss like a snaik. there eys is yellow. i dont let folks poak them.

tonite i called a meating of he Terible 3. i had rote the record of what we had did and Pewt had coppied it. i thougt i had better wright it becaus i can spel so mutch beter than Pewt.

well Pewt read the record and Beany reported that there wasent enny money in the tresury. then i asted if ennybody had ennything to say and Beany sed that we had better paist old decon Aspinwall next for he was so meen. i was afrade he wood lay it onto me becaus i had trubble with him 2 times.

then Pewt sed we cood nale up a sine in front of his house sa.s.sing him, but i had done that onct for a circus. so we desided to lay for him sum time but not yet. ennyway we have got him marked.

so after supper we took a few grean apples and our sticks and went into Pewts back yard behind the trees and plugged sum apples as hard as we cood without ameing. we fired them in the direxion of J. Albert Clarks house becaus he had ordered me and Beany out of his yard one day jest for nothing.

we wood all plug together jest as hard as we cood plug and then lissen hard. we cood tell by the sound when they wood hit on the roofs or not. bimeby we herd the gingle of gla.s.s 2 times. then we begun to play coram and kep hollering and laffin. then we herd J. Ward Levitt holler who in h.e.l.l is firing rocks through my winders. then he hollered to father and sed George look here and see what your dam boy has been up to and we herd father say what is it Ward and Ward sed he has broak 2 winders in my shop and you have got to pay for them.

then father sed all rite. if he done it i will pay but if he hasent done it i wont. so ferst father hollered for me and i dident hear him. then they went over to Beanys and i wasent there and Beanys mother sed i hadent been there. then they come through old Mrs. Seeveys yard and then into Pewts and we were playing coram. then J Ward sed here are the devils and father sed dident you hear me holler and i sed did you holler and looked at him sirprized and father sed i hollered louder than a steem wissel and i sed we were playing coram and making so mutch noise that i gess it drownded your holler out. then he sed how long have you been here and i sed ever sence suppr.

then father sed Ward says you broak 2 winders in his shop, and i sed how cood i when i have been here evry minit. and father sed are you sure you havent been out of this yard sence you come here, now dont you lie to me and i sed hoap to die and cross my throte have i Pewt have i Beany and Pewt and Beany both hoaped to die and crossed there throtes.

then father sed there Ward you see they coodent have did it for it is twict as far as enn one of them can throw and Ward he sed i dont know about that.

then father sed try boys and see how far you can throw and try as hard as you can. so i pict up a rock and let ding and nearly throwed my arm out of goint and it went clear across Mrs. Seeveys yard into Beanys and then Pewt he throwed clear over Beanys house into old Heads yard and beat me and Beany throwed into his yard but not so far as i did.

then old Ward he sed we dident try and father sed if you can throw across Mrs. Seeveys yard and into Watsons yard, Watson is Beanys father you know, i will pay for them winders even if Harry dident brake them.

then old J Ward he sed all rite George i will show these boys what i can do and he took off his long taled coat and roled up his sleaves and hunted round for a rock and then he let ding and the rock went sideways rite towards Mrs. Seeveys house and went rite throug one of her kichen winders and the minit it went in she come out yapping who has broak my winder and old J. Ward stood with his mouth open and one hind leg in the air where he had drawed it up when he saw the rock going towerds the winder.

so when she hollered who broak my winder he put his hind leg down and stutered and sed i gess i done it maam and she sed what did you do it for? aint you got enny better business than to go round throwing rocks throug peeples winders and he sed i was jest showing these boys how to throw a stone and she sed well if they cant throw enny better than you can i gess you havent showed them mutch. now if you will show me about 25 cents for that winder and i will say no moar about it. so old J. Ward pade her 25 cents and she went in. then father sed are you sure you dident brake them winders yourself Ward you seam to be a good shot. old J. Ward laffed and sed well George i gess these boys dident do it, but i am going to find out who done it if it takes me a weak. i bet that out of a John Bowley done it. John Bowley is Squawboo Bowley you know, or posiably that Peenut Perkins or Johnny Kelly. so old J. Ward is going to pich into them.

enny way we dident meen to brake his winders and the Terible 3 hasent got ennything agenst old J.

Ward for he is a good feller and dont never drive us out of his Carrige shop, but if we had sed we done it it mite let the hoal thing out. so i gess we done rite but we will even up with old J. Albert sum time. his time will come unless he changes his ways.