The Etiquette of To-day Part 11
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_Use_
The etiquette of the visiting card is a fluctuating one. It cannot be laid down for all time, or even for next season.
On entering at a reception, or afternoon tea, one leaves a card in the salver offered by the butler or attendant who opens the door, or upon the hall table, as a reminder to the hostess, who can hardly be expected to remember, if entertaining a large number, every one who has been there.
One does not leave cards at a wedding reception, however.
At an afternoon tea, it is no longer necessary to leave a card apiece from all the members of the invited families to all the members of the family of the hostess and her guests also. The single card for the host and hostess is all that is required.
Should one be invited to a series of receptions, one leaves cards only once although one may attend twice. Leaving cards in person after a tea or reception is good form only for ceremonious affairs. After the usual private reception one should certainly call.
If only one member of a family can attend a reception to which the others have been invited, she may leave the cards of the others, together with her own, with perfect propriety.
Also when one is not able to attend a reception or an afternoon tea, cards may be sent by mail, although it is better to send them by messenger, to arrive on the day of the entertainment. One should call within a fortnight.
It is not now considered necessary to call in person where formerly it was so held. The sending of the personal card often takes the place of the call. Nor need this be done by messenger. Cards for any purpose may now be sent by mail.
After removing from one part of the city to another, it is customary for ladies to send engraved cards with their new address and with their reception day to all of their circle of acquaintances.
A woman who is stopping for a brief time in a city where she has friends, sends to them her card containing her temporary address and the length of her stay, as "Here until June second," or "Here until Sunday."
A man, however, calls upon his friends, and if they are absent leaves his card giving the same information.
If a son old enough to go into society wishes to do so, his card is left with his father's and mother's at the beginning of the season.
He will then be invited to the functions given by the friends of his parents.
When there is illness or mourning in the household, friends leave their cards with the words "To inquire," "Sincere condolence," or "Sympathy" written upon them.
The card which accompanies wedding gifts should be the joint card of "Mr. and Mrs.," if the gift is sent jointly, and may well have the words "Best wishes and congratulations," written upon it.
The initials "_P. p. c._," meaning "_Pour prendre conge_," or "To take leave," are written upon one's personal cards, which are then sent out to one's friends when one is going away from a place either permanently or for a long time. They are usually written in the lower left-hand corner of the card. These cards may be sent by post, when the person leaving town has not the time to make a personal visit.
They are not used when leaving town for the summer.
It is quite proper to send or leave "_P. p. c._" cards when one goes away from a summer resort, especially if the people to whom they are sent do not live during the year in the same town or city with the sender.
It is no longer permissible to fold over the ends of a card, to signify that it was intended for all the members of the family.
The birth of a child may be announced by a small card containing the full name of the child daintily engraved, with the date of the birth in the lower left-hand corner. The card is tied to the mother's card by white ribbon, and both are enclosed in one envelope and sent by post.
Visiting cards for those who are in mourning are the same size as the ordinary card. The width of the black border is regulated by the degree of the relations.h.i.+p to the deceased.
_The Engraved Invitation_
A fine grade of heavy, unglazed, pure white paper, suede finish, in double sheet folded to a size about five by seven and a half inches, or less, inserted in an envelope of the same width but half the length, is used for the billet on which wedding invitations and announcements are engraved. The impress of the plate demarks a margin of about an inch.
A heavy or medium grade of white bristol board is used for invitations to "At Homes," dinner, receptions, dances, and all like social functions for which the common visiting card is not used. The size used varies with the number of words in the invitation, and may be quite large, as for a club or society reception, or formal openings or special occasions where a business corporation is the host. These cards have the same plate margin as the wedding invitation, although it is much narrower. Only the most formal invitations have s.p.a.ce left for the writing in of the name of the guest.
The billet, however, has certain advantages, especially where the occasion is very formal and select, and the information which should be furnished the guest is considerable. Elegance of this sort is now very costly.
Several styles of type are in use: namely, the script having close round letters, and being as nearly black as Roman or Old English when engraved; a script lighter and more cursive; an Old English lettering; a shaded Roman letter, which is constantly growing in popularity; shaded Caxton; solid and shaded French script; and a plain Roman block letter.
The script is the type most commonly used, both because of its beauty and legibility, and because of the comparative inexpensiveness of engraving, the cost being about half of that of either the Old English or the shaded Roman type.
It is obvious that the size of page in this book will not permit facsimile reproductions of specimens of invitations and other social forms, which in nearly every case require a different proportion of s.p.a.ce than the page offers. Therefore, to reproduce the style of lettering used for these forms has not been attempted. The examples present correct wording and proportionate arrangement.
The following plates, which are exact photographs of steel and copper engraving, present several styles of script, Old English, and shaded and plain Roman faces, but do not represent more than a few sizes, and those the most common.
[Ill.u.s.tration: Type styles and sizes for invitations]
_at the Church of the Messiah_
_Two Dancing Parties_
_request the pleasure of_
_At Home_ _At Home_
=announce the marriage of=
=BROOKLINE, Ma.s.sACHUSETTS=
=First Unitarian Church=
=request the honour of your presence=
_=Mr. and Mrs.=_ _=New Hamps.h.i.+re=_
=ANNOUNCE THE MARRIAGE OF=
=Mr. and Mrs.=
=at Emmanuel Church=
=at Warren, Pennsylvania=
_=Mrs. William Howell Meade=_
_Mrs. William Howell Meade_
=Mrs. William Howell Meade=
=MRS. WILLIAM HOWELL MEADE=
_Dining and Party Invitations_
The engraved card invitation for a luncheon is usually worded as follows:
The Etiquette of To-day Part 11
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The Etiquette of To-day Part 11 summary
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