Hard to Escape Chapter 29 Part2

This conversation naturally ended badly. I coldly watched Yin Xuan's departing figure.

From a young age, she had been sheltered too well. Even if the sky fell, she would believe that money could resolve the issue. If that didn't work, there was still her brother. Her understanding of the world was too biased because of how willful she was. She felt that I was taking advantage of Yin Li. But what did she know?

I hated Yin Li, yet I also depended on him and needed him. And at the same time, I carried an extreme loathing of myself for being like that.

But regardless, I deeply disdained relying on anyone. No one had ever given anything to me. Everything I had, that could be counted as my own, I had gained by my own efforts and therefore was deserving of it.

That night, I continued practicing in the studio. This time, I purchased a length of black cloth. I cut it into a suitable width and wrapped it around my head to cover my eyes.

When I had my eyes open, I couldn't help but be mesmerized by the world around me. But if I couldn't see anything, only my inner emotions could affect me. Twirling in the darkness, I finally grasped how to maintain my center of gravity.

I turned off all the lights, blindfolded myself, and practiced alone in the dark.

The darkness exacerbated my anxiety and uncertainty. I couldn't see anything. It was hard to judge s.p.a.ce and distance, and I couldn't see my footwork or arm placement. At the start, I couldn't avoid b.u.mping into everything. I could only attempt to feel things out by making a leap forwards, pausing, and then fumbling around to readjust. This was how much I lacked of confidence in myself when in the dark. I even had a slight fear of its silence.

In the dark, I was in a deadlock with an imaginary enemy. We spun, leapt, and twirled.

Ballet is not just a visual art, it is one of the spirit.

In the midst of all the silence, darkness, and sweat, I finally felt came to an equilibrium between my body and spirit.

I seamlessly linked up the spins and other movements into a continuous chain. On a burst of energy, I could even attempt the rapid turns of modern dance.

After pus.h.i.+ng myself like this a few nights in a row, I was finally satisfied and loosened my blindfold. I returned to the auditorium of the recital, turned on the stage lights, climbed up, and stood in the center of the stage.

Even looking out to all the empty audience seats below, I felt content. I had finally learned how to balance my pain and solitude.

Standing on that stage gave me a strange sort of feeling, like I had returned home. It was like poison, one becomes addicted yet is unaware. The desire to be on a stage seemed to be a thirst that flowed in my blood.

As I progressed in ballet, I slowly realized how large a part dance occupied in my heart, and how crazed it made me.

With every spin, I didn't need to think of anything. Dance was my life, my language, and my soul that I wished to set free.

Wu Ke could no longer use surprise as an emotion to express how she felt toward my dancing. Rather, as she watched, it seemed to become ecstasy.

And so, I auditioned for “Only I Dance”.

"You're hired?! Yan Xiao, good work!"

I had only received the casting confirmation, and hadn't even been a.s.signed a role yet. But Wu Ke, hearing of the news, seemed to be even more excited than me. "If you stand on stage in front of an audience, you will not be overlooked. When you dance, I can feel an unstoppable vitality."

At the end of the year, I bid farewell to Wu Ke and left for the movie set. Because of the many scenes featuring the corps de ballet, they had hired a good number of people. The director needed to ensure that even if members of the corps de ballet became injured and unable to perform, there would be enough backups.

For most of the time, we only followed what the ch.o.r.eographer told us to do. I didn't catch any glimpse of Yin Xuan.

On the day that she did finally appear, it was very lively as expected.

"No, I want someone else! She's too slow by half a beat and can't keep up with the tempo. I almost b.u.mped into her once. I don't feel safe dancing next to her." Yin Xuan argued with the director as the makeup artist applied her makeup.

The director was embarra.s.sed. "But this is already the eighth person. The shooting has already been delayed considerably."

"Then find someone from the corps. I really can't perform with a dancer like her around."

The director reviewed the dancer's footage, and in the end, agreed to Yin Xuan's demand. He immediately turned to face the members of the corps de ballet's rest area and announced, "We need to make a change to Miss Yin's dance accompaniment and select another dancer. If you would like to be considered, please sign up and prepare to perform a short segment. We will be picking someone from amongst you all."

Many young girls in the corps de ballet hoped to gain more screen time, be discovered on the silver screen, and achieve stardom overnight. There seemed to be no hesitation among them. Everyone vied to perform directly in front of Yin Xuan and the director.

Yin Xuan watched each member of the corps de ballet dance. Her expression was cold and serious.

I came forwards to stand in front of her.

She only intently studied my footwork, and didn't notice my face.

"This one will do," she turned to the director and said. Then, she finally saw my face.

I quietly stood to one side and looked back at her, my gaze unyielding.

She quickly withdrew the brief flash of surprise from her face, and then gave me a profound smile. "Director Meng, I don't want her anymore."

"I don't want her as dance accompaniment. I want her playing the supporting character."

She quickly cut off the director before he could say anything. "I know the producers have specially invited the Chinese winner of the last Prix de Lausanne to dance the part. I will bear all responsibility for this. I want this person to be the supporting character, and I'll pay all the extra expenses."