Fanny and the Servant Problem Part 5

VERNON. Thanks. Well, I shall be glad of a bath. [He turns to f.a.n.n.y.] Bennet will send your maid to you. [He whispers to her.]

You'll soon get used to it all. As for the confounded family--we will forget all about them. [f.a.n.n.y answers with another little stifled sob. Bennet is drawing the curtains, his back to the room.

Vernon, seeing that Bennet is occupied, kisses the unresponsive f.a.n.n.y and goes out.]

At the sound of the closing of the door, f.a.n.n.y looks up. She goes to the door through which Vernon has just pa.s.sed, listens a moment, then returns. Bennet calmly finishes the drawing of the curtains. Then he, too, crosses slowly till he and f.a.n.n.y are facing one another across the centre of the room.

f.a.n.n.y. Well, what are you going to do?

BENNET. My duty!

f.a.n.n.y. What's that? Something unpleasant, I know. I can bet my bottom dollar.

BENNET. That, my girl, will depend upon you.

f.a.n.n.y. How upon me?

BENNET. Whether you prove an easy or a difficult subject. To fit you for your position, a certain amount of training will, I fancy, be necessary.

f.a.n.n.y. Training! I'm to be--[She draws herself up.] Are you aware who I am?

BENNET. Oh yes. AND who you were. His lords.h.i.+p, I take it, would hardly relish the discovery that he had married his butler's niece.

He might consider the situation awkward.

f.a.n.n.y. And who's going to train me?

BENNET. I am. With the a.s.sistance of your aunt and such other members of your family as I consider can be trusted.

f.a.n.n.y [for a moment she is speechless, then she bursts out]. That ends it! I shall tell him! I shall tell him this very moment. [She sweeps towards the door.]

BENNET. At this moment you will most likely find his lords.h.i.+p in his bath.

f.a.n.n.y. I don't care! Do you think--do you think for a moment that I'm going to allow myself--I, Lady Bantock, to be--[Her hand upon the door.] I shall tell him, and you'll only have yourself to blame. He loves me. He loves me for myself. I shall tell him the whole truth, and ask him to give you all the sack.

BENNET. You're not forgetting that you've already told him ONCE who you were?

[It stops her. What she really did was to leave the marriage arrangements in the hands of her business manager, George P. Newte.

As agent for a music-hall star, he is ideal, but it is possible that in answering Lord Bantock's inquiries concerning f.a.n.n.y's antecedents he may not have kept strictly to the truth.]

f.a.n.n.y. I never did. I've never told him anything about my family.

BENNET. Curious. I was given to understand it was rather a cla.s.sy affair.

f.a.n.n.y. I can't help what other people may have done. Because some silly idiot of a man may possibly--[She will try a new tack. She leaves the door and comes to him.] Uncle, dear, wouldn't it be simpler for you all to go away? He's awfully fond of me. He'll do anything I ask him. I could merely say that I didn't like you and get him to pension you off. You and aunt could have a little roadside inn somewhere--with ivy.

BENNET. Seeing that together with the stables and the garden there are twenty-three of us -

f.a.n.n.y. No, of course, he couldn't pension you all. You couldn't expect -

BENNET. I think his lords.h.i.+p might prefer to leave things as they are. Good servants nowadays are not so easily replaced. And neither your aunt nor I are at an age when change appeals to one.

f.a.n.n.y. You see, it's almost bound to creep out sooner or later, and then -

BENNET. We will make it as late as possible [He crosses and rings the bell], giving you time to prove to his lords.h.i.+p that you are not incapable of learning.

f.a.n.n.y [she drops back on the settee. She is half-crying.] Some people would be pleased that their niece had married well.

BENNET. I am old-fas.h.i.+oned enough to think also of my duty to those I serve. If his lords.h.i.+p has done me the honour to marry my niece, the least I can is to see to it that she brings no discredit to his name. [Mrs. Bennet, followed by Jane Bennet, a severe-looking woman of middle age, has entered upon the words "the least I can do."

Bennet stays them a moment with his hand while he finishes. Then he turns to his wife.] You will be interested to find, Susannah, that the new Lady Bantock is not a stranger.

MRS. BENNET. Not a stranger! [She has reached a position from where she sees the girl.] f.a.n.n.y! You wicked girl! Where have you been all these years?

BENNET [interposing]. There will be other opportunities for the discussion of family differences. Just now, her ladys.h.i.+p is waiting to dress for dinner.

MRS. BENNET [sneering]. Her ladys.h.i.+p!

JANE [also sneering]. I think she might have forewarned us of the honour in store for us.

MRS. BENNET. Yes, why didn't she write?

f.a.n.n.y. Because I didn't know. Do you think--[she rises]--that if I had I would ever have married him--to be brought back here and put in this ridiculous position? Do you think that I am so fond of you all that I couldn't keep away from you, at any price?

MRS. BENNET. But you must have known that Lord Bantock -

f.a.n.n.y. I didn't know he was Lord Bantock. I only knew him as Mr.

Wetherell, an artist. He wanted to feel sure that I was marrying him for himself alone. He never told me--[Ernest Bennet, a very young footman, has entered in answer to Bennet's ring of a minute ago. He has come forward step by step, staring all the while open-mouthed at f.a.n.n.y. Turning, she sees him beside her.] Hulloa, Ernie. How are the rabbits? [She kisses him.]

BENNET. Don't stand there gaping. I rang for some wood. Tell your brother dinner will be at a quarter to eight.

Ernest, never speaking, still staring at f.a.n.n.y, gets clumsily out again.

f.a.n.n.y. Well, I suppose I'd better see about dressing? Do I dine with his lords.h.i.+p or in the servants' hall?

MRS. BENNET [turns to her husband]. You see! Still the old impertinence.

f.a.n.n.y. Only wanted to know. My only desire is to give satisfaction.

BENNET [he moves towards the door]. You will do it by treating the matter more seriously. At dinner, by keeping your eye upon me, you will be able to tell whether you are behaving yourself or not.

MRS. BENNET. And mind you are punctual. I have appointed Jane to be your maid.

f.a.n.n.y. Jane!

MRS. BENNET [in arms]. Have you any objections?

f.a.n.n.y. No, oh no, so long as you're all satisfied.

MRS. BENNET. Remember, you are no longer on the music-hall stage.

In dressing for Bantock Hall you will do well to follow her advice.

Bennet, who has been waiting with the door in his hand, goes out; Mrs. Bennet follows.