Count Bunker Part 23

"'My loff she's like a red, red rose Zat's newly sp.r.o.ng in June!

My loff she's like a melody Zat's sveetly blayed in tune!

Ach, how does he end?"

Before his charmer had time to prompt him, the Count raised his own tolerably musical voice and replied--

"'And fare thee weel, my second string!

And fare thee weel awhile!

I won t come back again, my love, For tis ower mony mile!

For an instant there followed a profound silence, and then the voice of the Baron replied, with somewhat forced mirth--

"Vary goot, Bonker! Ha, ha! Vary goot!"

Meanwhile Bunker, without further delay, was pus.h.i.+ng his way through a tangle of shrubbery till in a moment he spied the boat moored beneath the leafy bank, and although it was a capacious craft he observed that its two occupants were both crowded into one end.

"I am sent to escort you back to dinner," he said blandly.

"Tell zem ve shall be back in three minutes," replied the Baron, making a prodigious show of preparation for coming ash.o.r.e.

"I am sorry to say that my orders were strictly to escort, not to herald you," said the Count apologetically.

Fortifying himself against unpopularity by the consciousness that he was doing his duty, this well-principled, even if spurious, n.o.bleman paced back towards the house with the lady between him and the indignant Baron.

"Well, Tulliwuddle," he discoursed, in as friendly a tone as ever, "I left your cards with our American neighbors."

"So?" muttered the Baron stolidly.

"They received me with open arms, and I have taken the liberty of accepting on behalf of Mr., Mrs., and Miss Gallosh, and of our two selves, a very cordial invitation to lunch with them to-morrow."

"Impossible!" cried the Baron gruffly.

Eva turned a reproachful eye upon him.

"Oh, Lord Tulliwuddle! I should so like to go."

The Baron looked at her blankly.

"You vould!"

"I have heard they are such nice people, and have such a beautiful place!"

"I can confirm both statements," said the Count heartily.

"Besides, papa and mamma would be very disappointed if we didn't go."

"Make it as you please," said the Baron gloomily.

His unsuspicious hosts heard of the invitation with such outspoken pleasure that their honored guest could not well renew his protest. He had to suffer the arrangement to be made; but that night when he and Bunker withdrew to their own room, the Count perceived the makings of an argumentative evening.

"Sometimes you interfere too moch," the Baron began without preamble.

"Do you mind being a little more specific?" replied the Count with smiling composure.

"Zere vas no hurry to lonch mit Maddison."

"I didn't name the date."

"You might have said next veek."

"By next week Miss Maddison may be snapped up by some one else."

"Zen vould Tollyvoddle be more lucky! I have nearly got for him ze most charming girl, mit as moch money as he vants. Ach, you do interfere! You should gonsider ze happiness of Tollyvoddle."

"That is the only consideration that affects yourself, Baron?"

"Of course! I cannot marry more zan vonce." (Bunker thought he perceived a symptom of a sigh.) "And I most be faithful to Alicia. I most! Ach, yes, Bonker, do not fear for me! I am so constant as--ach, I most keep faithful!"

As he supplied this remarkable testimony to his own fidelity, the Baron paced the floor with an agitation that clearly showed how firmly his constancy was based.

Nevertheless the Count was smiling oddly at something he espied upon the mantelpiece, and stepping up to it he observed--

"Here is a singular phenomenon--a bunch of white heather that has got itself tied together with ribbon!"

The Baron started, and took the tiny bouquet from his hand, his eyes sparkling with delight.

"It must be a gift from----" he began, and then laid it down again, though his gaze continued fixed upon it. "How did it gom in?" he mused.

"Ach! she most have brought it herself. How vary nice!"

He turned suddenly and met his friend's humorous eyes.

"I shall be faithful, Bonker! You can trust me!" he exclaimed; "I shall put it in my letter to Alicia, and send it mit my love! See, Bonker!"

He took a letter from his desk--its envelope still open--hurriedly slipped in the white heather, and licked the gum while his resolution was hot. Then, having exhibited this somewhat singular evidence of his constancy, he sighed again.

"It vas ze only safe vay," he said dolefully. "Vas I not right, Bonker?"

"Quite, my dear Baron," replied the Count sympathetically. "Believe me, I appreciate your self-sacrifice. In fact, it was to relieve the strain upon your too generous heart that I immediately accepted Mr. Maddison's invitation for to-morrow."

"How so?" demanded the Baron with perhaps excusable surprise.

"You will be able to decide at once which is the most suitable bride for Tulliwuddle, and then, if you like, we can leave in a day or two."

"Bot I do not vish to leave so soon!"

"Well then, while you stay, you can at least make sure that you are engaging the affections of the right girl."

Though Bunker spoke with an air of desiring merely to a.s.sist his friend, the speech seemed to arouse some furious thinking in the Baron's mind.