A Select Collection of Old English Plays Volume Ix Part 31

AMORETTO.

I know not his name; but he is a grave, discreet man, I warrant him: indeed, he wants utterance in some measure.

ACADEMICO.

Nay, methinks he hath very good utterance for his gravity, for he came hither very grave; but, I think, he will return light enough, when he is rid of the heavy element he carries about him. [_Aside_.

AMORETTO.

Faith, sir, you must pardon me: it is my ordinary custom to be too studious; my mistress hath told me of it often, and I find it to hurt my ordinary discourse: but say, sweet sir, do ye affect the most gentlemanlike game of hunting?

ACADEMICO.

How say you to the crafty gull? he would fain get me abroad to make sport with me in their hunters' terms, which we scholars are not acquainted with. [_Aside_.] Sir, I have loved this kind of sport; but now I begin to hate it, for it hath been my luck always to beat the bush, while another killed the hare.

AMORETTO.

Hunters' luck, hunters' luck, sir; but there was a fault in your hounds, that did spend well.

ACADEMICO.

Sir, I have had worse luck always at hunting the fox.

AMORETTO.

What, sir, do you mean at the unkennelling, untapezing, or earthing of the fox?

ACADEMICO.

I mean, earthing, if you term it so;--for I never found yellow earth enough to cover the old fox your father. [_Aside_.

AMORETTO.

Good faith, sir, there is an excellent skill in blowing for the terriers; it is a word that we hunters use. When the fox is earthed, you must blow one long, two short; the second wind, one long, two short. Now, sir, in blowing, every long containeth seven quavers, one short containeth three quavers.

ACADEMICO.

Sir, might I find any favour in my suit, I would wind the horn, wherein your boon[87] deserts should be sounded with so many minims, so many quavers.

AMORETTO.

Sweet sir, I would I could confer this or any kindness upon you:--I wonder, the boy comes not away with my hobby. Now, sir, as I was proceeding--when you blow the death of your fox in the field or covert, then must you sound three notes with three winds, and recheat, mark you, sir, upon the same with three winds.

ACADEMICO.

I pray you, sir.

AMORETTO.

Now, sir, when you come to your stately gate, as you sounded the recheat before, so now you must sound the relief three times.

ACADEMICO.

Relief, call you it? it were good, every patron would find the horn.

[_Aside_.

AMORETTO.

O sir, but your relief is your sweetest note: that is, sir, when your hounds hunt after a game unknown; and then you must sound one long and six short; the second wind, two short and one long; the third wind, one long and two short.

ACADEMICO.

True, sir, it is a very good trade nowadays to be a villain; I am the hound that hunts after a game unknown, and blows the villain.

[_Aside_.]

AMORETTO.

Sir, I will bless your ears with a very pretty story: my father, out of his own cost and charges, keeps an open table for all kind of dogs.

ACADEMICO.

And he keeps one more by thee. [_Aside_.]

AMORETTO.

He hath your greyhound, your mongrel, your mastiff, your levrier, your spaniel, your kennets, terriers, butchers' dogs, bloodhounds, dunghill-dogs, trundle-tails, p.r.i.c.k-eared curs, small ladies' puppies, raches,[88] and b.a.s.t.a.r.ds.

ACADEMICO.

What a bawdy knave hath he to his father, that keeps his Rachel, hath his b.a.s.t.a.r.ds, and lets his sons be plain ladies' puppies to bewray a lady's chamber. [_Aside_.]

AMORETTO.

It was my pleasure, two days ago, to take a gallant leash of greyhounds; and into my father's park I went, accompanied with two or three n.o.blemen of my near acquaintance, desiring to show them some of the sport. I caused the keeper to sever the rascal deer from the bucks of the first head. Now, sir, a buck the first year is a fawn, the second year a p.r.i.c.ket, the third year a sorel, the fourth year a sore, the fifth a buck of the first head, the sixth year a complete buck; as likewise your hart is the first year a calf, the second year a brocket, the third year a spade, the fourth year a stag, the fifth year a great stag, the sixth year a hart; as likewise the roebuck is the first year a kid, the second year a girl, the third year a hemuse: and these are your special beasts for chase, or, as we huntsmen call it, for venery.

ACADEMICO.

If chaste be taken for venery, thou art a more special beast than any in thy father's forest. [_Aside_.] Sir, I am sorry I have been so troublesome to you.

AMORETTO.

I know this was the readiest way to chase away the scholar, by getting him into a subject he cannot talk of for his life. [_Aside_.] Sir, I will borrow so much time of you as to finish this my begun story. Now, sir, after much travel we singled a buck; I rode that same time upon a roan gelding, and stood to intercept from the thicket; the buck broke gallantly; my great swift being disadvantaged in his slip was at the first behind; marry, presently coted and outstripped them, when as the hart presently descended to the river, and being in the water, proffered and reproffered, and proffered again: and, at last, he upstarted at the other side of the water, which we call soil of the hart, and there other huntsmen met him with an adauntreley;[89] we followed in hard chase for the s.p.a.ce of eight hours; thrice our hounds were at default, and then we cried _A slain_! straight, _So ho_; through good reclaiming my faulty hounds found their game again, and so went through the wood with gallant noise of music, resembling so many _viols de gambo_. At last the hart laid him down, and the hounds seized upon him; he groaned, and wept, and died. In good faith, it made me weep too, to think of Actaeon's fortune, which my Ovid speaks of-- [_He reads Ovid_.

_Militat omnis amans, et habet sua castra Cupido_.

ACADEMICO.

Sir, can you put me in any hope of obtaining my suit?

AMORETTO.

In good faith, sir, if I did not love you as my soul, I would not make you acquainted with the mysteries of my art.

ACADEMICO.

Nay, I will not die of a discourse yet, if I can choose.

[_Exit unperceived_.

AMORETTO.

So, sir, when we had rewarded our dogs with the small guts, and the lights, and the blood, the huntsmen hallooed, _So ho! Venue_, a coupler; and so coupled the dogs, and then returned homeward. Another company of hounds, that lay at advantage, had their couples cast off, and we might hear the huntsmen cry, _Horse, decouple, avant_; but straight we heard him cry, _Le amond_, and by that I knew that they had the hare, and on foot; and by and by I might see sore and resore, p.r.i.c.k and rep.r.i.c.k.

What, is he gone! ha, ha, ha, ha! these scholars are the simplest creatures!

ACTUS II., SCAENA 6.

_Enter Amoretto's_ PAGE.

PAGE.

I wonder what is become of that Ovid _de arte amandi_.[90] My master, he that for the practice of his discourse is wont to court his hobby abroad and at home, in his chamber makes a set speech to his greyhound, desiring that most fair and amiable dog to grace his company in a stately galliard; and if the dog, seeing him practise his l.u.s.ty points, as his cross-point back-caper, chance to bewray the room, he presently doft's his cap, most solemnly makes a low leg to his ladys.h.i.+p, taking it for the greatest favour in the world that she would vouchsafe to leave her civet-box or her sweet glove behind her.

[_Enter_ AMORETTO, _reading Ovid_.]

Not a word more. Sir, an't please you, your hobby will meet you at the lane's end.