Three Hats Part 15

(Taking card from him.) You may go--stop--(reading card.) Show the lady up, and not a word of warning to her that she will meet _me_ instead of your master. If you breathe a syllable to her you shall be discharged. Keep whistling all the while go that I may know you are not telling her. (DIBBS whistles Dead March and goes off slowly; he is heard in the distance as if he went downstairs. The sound becomes louder as he returns with lady.)

Enter DIBBS, followed by MISS LOTTIE BLITHERS; she is a showily-dressed young lady of prepossessing appearance.

MRS. S. (to DIBBS, who continues to whistle). That will do!

(Exit DIBBS.

MISS B. Pardon my intrusion, madam, but I have called respecting a gentleman residing here.

MRS. S. Indeed!

MISS B. I have written to him more than once, but received no answer.

MRS. S. Recently?

MISS B. To-day.

MRS. S. (recollecting the letter of Act I.). Written here--was your letter signed "Lottie"?

MISS B. Yes. It's my name. I have placed myself in a false position, and I want my husband at once to release me from it.

MRS. S. Have you brought him with you?

MISS B. No--I am here to find him!

MRS. S. To find him! (Aside.) That letter was _not_ for Fred, but for Sam, after all. (Aloud.) When did you last see him?

MISS B. Last night.

MRS. S. (aside). So he took advantage of my short absence!

(Aloud.) Madam, I am loath to hurt your feelings, but I fear that you have been imposed upon by a _married man_!

MISS B. Married! Oh! I see now why he pretended our union must be kept secret from the world! I am a wretched woman! (Sobbing, sits L.)

MRS. S. I, too, have been blinded, but we will unmask the traitor between us. Step in here!

MISS B. Oh! I could tear his eyes out!

MRS. S. That I could never allow you to do. I want to do it myself!

(Exit MISS BLITHERS into room, L.

MRS. S. (locking door). Now to confront the double-dyed deceiver! He shall not know I have learnt all his perfidies!

I know I have him firmly on the hook--and I will play with him in order to watch his struggles! He comes, the wretch!

Enter SELWYN, R. 2 E., looking very anxious; seeing his wife he a.s.sumes a sickly sort of smile.

SEL. So glad you are here, dearest!

MRS. S. (confronting him, severely). You told me Lottie's letter was _not_ for you.

SEL. Lot--Lottie! (Nervously).

MRS. S. I speak plainly, do I not? Lottie--_you_ know Lottie?

SEL. Yes! I know--or I did know--a lot of Lotties--but all at a respectful distance--and a very long while ago.

MRS. S. I refer to last night only!

SEL. (aside). Done for! She's found me out! (Aloud.) Last night? Let me see--where was I last night?

MRS. S. No doubt where you have often been before.

SEL. (aside). She means the "Geranium." Yes, my dear, I _have_ been there before--but alone! always alone!

MRS. S. Samuel! Elaborate lies are useless--She's here now!

Yes, she came for _you_ and saw _me_!

SEL. (feebly). Appearances _may_ be against me, but----

MRS. S. No excuses! If you don't make a full confession of everything you did last night, never hope to be forgiven. I have only to open that door, and _she_ will give me a full account herself, but I prefer to hear it from _your_ guilty lips! Go on!

SEL. (with an effort). Well, Bella! Last night, feeling lonely, I wandered down Knightsbridge way, and dropped in on Dobbinson--and that's all! (Pulling up suddenly.)

MRS. S. That's _not_ all! Shall I open the door?

SEL. (anxiously). No! no! Well, after dinner, feeling unwell, the salmon had disagreed with me, I think--I started to walk home--and--and--that's all!

MRS. S. (sternly). Go on, sir!

SEL. (piteously). I was near the Marble Arch when I heard footsteps behind me--female footsteps--I turned and beheld a lady--so--I--I--hastily fled--and that's all!

MRS. S. Sir! It is _not_ all!

SEL. Isn't it? If you know so much about it, why ask me?

MRS. S. I mean to make you feel ashamed of yourself! Go on!

SEL. She asked me the way to Ludgate Hill--and that _is_ all!

MRS. S. (sternly). Go on!

SEL. Nearly all! I directed her--and I won't deny (for I scorn evasion!) that I even accompanied her as far as Piccadilly! And there I left her, and if that isn't all may I be----

MRS. S. You _will_ be--no doubt! I have heard enough of your miserable confession. (Giving key.) Now open the door, and let the creature go about her business! You will never be left alone again! Never so long as I live! (Going, R.)

SEL. (taking key, crossing L., and with great hesitation opening door). This is torture! Step this way, please Miss!

FRED appears at open door, L.