The Book Of Good Manners; A Guide To Polite Usage For All Social Functions Part 19

If two or more sisters enter society at about the same time, their names may appear on their mother's card as The Misses Wilson.

The name of the younger daughter should appear in full on her mother's card--as, Miss Mary Jane Wilson.

Until the younger daughter has formally, made her debut, she visits only intimate friends of the family. After her debut she has no card, and her full baptismal name appears on her mother's card, beneath her name, and not until a year or two after her first appearance does she have a card of her own.

When a mother leaves her daughter's card, it is for the hostess only.

If reception days appear on the mother's card, the daughters also receive on that day, as they have no reception date of their own.

After an entertainment the cards of the family may be left for the host and hostess by the eldest daughter.

The eldest daughter has her own circle of acquaintances, and can visit and receive independently of her mother.

DUTIES AT b.a.l.l.s. See b.a.l.l.s--DUTIES OF DAUGHTERS.

DAUGHTER OF BARON--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor to remain, Madam, your obedient servant.

A social letter begins: Dear Miss Wilson, and ends: Believe me, I remain sincerely yours.

The envelope addressed to the eldest daughter reads: To the Honorable Miss Wilson, but to a younger daughter: To the Honorable Minnie Wilson.

DAUGHTER OF DUKE--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor to remain your Ladys.h.i.+p's most obedient servant.

The address on the envelope is: To the Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane, and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very faithfully yours.

The address is: To the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

DAUGHTERS OF EARL--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor to remain your Ladys.h.i.+p's most obedient servant.

The address on the envelope is: To the Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane, and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very faithfully yours.

The address is: To the Lady Jane F.

Wilson.

DAUGHTER OF MARQUIS--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor to remain your Ladys.h.i.+p's most obedient servant.

The address on the envelope is: To the Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane, and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very faithfully yours.

The address is: To the Lady Jane F.

Wilson.

DAUGHTER OF VISCOUNT--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor to remain, madam, your obedient servant.

A social letter begins: Dear Miss Wilson, and ends: Believe me, Miss Wilson, sincerely yours.

The envelope addressed to the eldest daughter would read: To the Honorable Miss Wilson, but to a younger daughter: To the Honorable Minnie Wilson.

DAYS AT HOME. Only very intimate persons should call on any other days than those named on an At Home card.

DAY OF WEDDING. The wedding-day is named by the bride, and her mother's approval is asked by the groom.

DEATH IN THE FAMILY. Cards, writing-paper, and envelopes should be bordered in black. The announcement of the death may be printed or engraved, preferably the latter. Full name of deceased, together with date of birth and death, and residence, should be given.

The frequenting of places of amus.e.m.e.nts, entertainments, or social functions should not be indulged in for at least a year if in mourning for near relatives.

CONDOLENCE. After a death in the family of an acquaintance, a card with the word Condolence written on it should be left in person or by messenger. For very intimate acquaintances, cut flowers may be left in person or sent, together with a card or letter, unless request has been made not to do so.

DEBUTANTE. A debutante should make her debut between the ages of seventeen and twenty, and should not appear at any public function before her debut. She should be thoroughly versed in the laws of good society. She should be extremely cautious at all times in her dealings with men. She should follow, without reserve, the advice of mother or chaperone. She should avoid forwardness, and be quiet in manner and in speech. Men acquaintances should be carefully chosen, and great care exercised in accepting invitations from them.

AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL). When a tea is given in honor of a debutante, she stands beside the hostess (usually her mother), and each guest is introduced to her. Flowers should be liberally provided, and friends may contribute on such an occasion.

A debutante should not make any formal visits alone the first year, and should not receive men visitors unless her chaperone is present. Should a man call during the first season, and neither her mother nor her chaperone be present, she should decline the visit. She may make and receive visitors alone the second season.

When calling upon a debutante, men and women should leave cards for her and her mother.

CARDS. A debutante should use her mother's card with her name engraved under her mother's, but after a season she uses her own card. Personal cards should not be used during the first season. If she is the eldest unmarried daughter, her name is engraved (as, Miss A--) beneath her mother's name, but if there are other sisters, with the initials (as, Miss A. A--).

The cards of a debutante may be sent by mail or messenger.

DANCES. A debutante always receives with her mother standing by her side. A good order is for the mother to stand nearest the door, the debutante next, and the father last.

It is a good plan for the debutante to ask a few of her girl friends to stand beside her the first half hour.