Nightmare - A Novel Part 12

"It's okay," Kendi rea.s.sured her. "Really. Completely okay." A sister! She's his sister! A sister! She's his sister!

"Right," Pitr said. "We'd better get to cla.s.s before we're late. Are you going to be at Festival tonight, Kendi?"

"Sure am," he said instantly.

"Great. We'll probably see you there. And there's your flying lesson tomorrow. Later, okay?" He flashed a quick smile that made Kendi's heart soar before he headed off with his sister sister. Kendi stared after him, admiring Pitr's muscular figure from behind. A strange coppery taste tanged his mouth.

Mother Ara tapped his good shoulder, startling him. "All right, sun boy. I'm not going to add a duty s.h.i.+ft to your week, but I think it'd be appropriate if you helped the custodian repair the gutter, all right?"

"Yes, Mother," Kendi said meekly.

"I'll see to it, Mother," Dorna put in. "Come on, Kendi. Let's go find her."

She took him by the arm and lead him firmly away. The moment they were out of sight and earshot, she stopped and gave him a heavy-lidded stare.

"Which one is it?" she demanded.

"Which one is what?" he said, bewildered.

"Which one do you have your eye on, Casanova? Come on, be honest."

Kendi flushed one more time, and again something bothered him about Dorna. Exactly what it was still eluded him. "I-I don't know what you're-"

"Yes you do." She leaned forward and whispered breathily in his ear. "I can tell. It's written all over you. Go ahead, you can tell me. Maybe we can figure out what to do about it."

Her breath was warm in his ear and it sent a confusing shudder through his body. "It's Pitr," he confessed without knowing why. "But you can't tell anyone!"

"Wouldn't dream of it." Dorna tucked her hand under his arm and continued walking. Kendi stumbled to stay with her. "It does make things trickier, though. I don't know if Pitr goes for the boys, even ones from Earth. I guess I could ask around."

"Don't!" Kendi said, horrified. "Everyone'll know."

"No risk, no gain, big boy. But if it's going to get you upset, I won't. Let's see." Dorna pursed her lips in thought. "Pitr is interested in Earth, and you come from the place. That seems like a logical place to start. Hmmmmm ...Earth. What does it say to me? It says far away. far away. It says It says exotic. exotic. It says It says I'm available I'm available."

"It says hot, dry, and boring hot, dry, and boring," Kendi supplied.

"I think we'll leave that part out," Dorna said. "Now shut up let me think." She made some mmmmm mmmmm noises as they walked. "We could tell him you're dying of a terrible Terran genetic disorder, and you have one last request. Or maybe that your ancestors gave you a directive-to hunt down someone cute and drag him home by the hair." noises as they walked. "We could tell him you're dying of a terrible Terran genetic disorder, and you have one last request. Or maybe that your ancestors gave you a directive-to hunt down someone cute and drag him home by the hair."

"Pitr's hair is too short for dragging," Kendi pointed out.

"Don't bother me with silly details. Maybe we should just cold-c.o.c.k him. I've always wanted to do that to someone. It sounds so suggestive."

As they continued into the dorm and downstairs, Dorna outlined half a dozen more plans for getting Pitr's attention, each one more outrageous than the last. Kendi laughed, his embarra.s.sment forgotten, even when they found the head custodian and told her what had happened with the gutter. The older woman sighed, muttered about empty-headed first-years, and told Kendi to meet her right after his cla.s.ses were over for the day.

"Speaking of which," Dorna said, "you better fly, Casanova. Meet for supper?"

Kendi agreed and ran upstairs to get his data pad, then trotted outside into the warm suns.h.i.+ne. Cla.s.ses. He had cla.s.ses. Good. They would take his mind off Pitr. He headed down a walkway and up a set of stairs. Talltree leaves rustled in the morning breeze. Pots of flowers, both real and artificial, decorated the buildings and balconies in red and blue-reputed to be Irfan Qasad's favorite colors-for this evening's celebration, and signs and holograms proclaimed Joyous Awakening! Joyous Awakening! from windows and front porches. Kendi wouldn't think about Pitr, no he wouldn't. from windows and front porches. Kendi wouldn't think about Pitr, no he wouldn't.

The boards on the decks and walkways alternated between warm from the sun and cool from the shade. These days Kendi preferred to go barefoot, as the Real People usually did. No one in the monastery seemed to care, as long as he wore shoes to the cafeteria.

Maybe he should take Mother Ara's advice and tell Pitr at Festival. Everyone said the Awakening was a time of beginnings, changes, and new directions. People made resolutions for things they wanted to change in their lives. It was also a traditional day on which to propose marriage. It was also a time of happiness, goodwill, and cheer, when it was considered bad luck to be rude or disrespectful. An appropriate time to talk to Pitr.

If only Kendi could work up the nerve.

The byways were busy with people, both human and Ched-Balaar. Kendi automatically pressed fingertips to forehead whenever he pa.s.sed anyone ranked Parent or higher. It had barely been a week since he had arrived on Bellerophon, but he felt perfectly at home and had already learned his way around the monastery and memorized his schedule. Mornings and early afternoons were spent in cla.s.s. Late afternoons were reserved for study and private lessons with Mother Ara in using Silence. He was also required to work at least fifteen hours a week on duty s.h.i.+ft, doing whatever needed to be done around the monastery. Students worked jobs ranging from serving food in the cafeteria to was.h.i.+ng windows to gardening, depending on knowledge, apt.i.tude, and interest. Kendi had so far been on outdoor cleanup, which involved going all the way down to the ground and picking up detritus that fell from the monastery above. He had done it twice and so far hadn't seen a single dinosaur, to his combination relief and disappointment. All in all, though, it was a busy schedule, and he wondered if it was designed to keep newcomers from getting homesick or missing loved ones. Sometimes it even worked.

Kendi arrived at history cla.s.s just in time. The teacher was a brown-robed young Sister with short blond hair, a plump build, and merry brown eyes.

"Kendi!" called Kite. "Verhere."

With a nod Kendi took a seat at the table with Kite, Willa, and Jeren. Although Kendi had met other students, he liked best hanging out with the others he had been "bought" with.

"All right now," called Sister Bren, the teacher. "Let's review yesterday a little before we go on. Who remembers what this is?" In the center of the cla.s.sroom appeared a hologram of a blue-green-brown planet with a single moon. Kendi instantly recognized Bellerophon. A dot of light circled the planet. The view zoomed in toward the light, and it ballooned into a meteor-pocked, gray cylinder parked in planetary orbit. It looked almost exactly like the colony s.h.i.+p Kendi had boarded with his family.

"The Margery Daw Margery Daw," said several students.

"And the captain was ...?" Sister Bren prompted.

"Irfan Qasad."

The view rotated around the planet to reveal another s.h.i.+p, low and round with a clear top, like a flattened bubble.

"That's the Ched-Balaar," piped up another student. "You said they don't name their s.h.i.+ps. They got here first."

"That's absolutely right." Bren tapped at the controls on her desk and a tiny shuttle scooted away from the Margery Daw Margery Daw and docked with the Ched-Balaar vessel. "She was one of the first humans to lay eyes on an alien race. Lucky for us they were friendly." A while later, several dozen shuttles spilled out of the human s.h.i.+p like scattering dandelion seeds and dropped gently to the planet below. The view zoomed in again, showing humans working side-by-side with Ched-Balaar in the top of the talltree forest, building houses and walkways. and docked with the Ched-Balaar vessel. "She was one of the first humans to lay eyes on an alien race. Lucky for us they were friendly." A while later, several dozen shuttles spilled out of the human s.h.i.+p like scattering dandelion seeds and dropped gently to the planet below. The view zoomed in again, showing humans working side-by-side with Ched-Balaar in the top of the talltree forest, building houses and walkways.

"Records differ on this point," Bren reminded them. "We don't know if Treetown started before or after the Ched-Balaar took the first group of humans into the Dream, but that's a minor aside. Who all did the Ched-Balaar first bring into the Dream?"

The holographic view s.h.i.+fted again to a night-time campfire on a fern-covered forest floor. A group of Ched-Balaar sat near it playing odd-looking drums and rattles.

"Irfan Qasad," Jeren called out. A sharp-faced woman with a long brown braid popped into existence near the campfire. Her expression was both thoughtful and wary. "I'd slip her s.p.a.ce anytime."

"Jeren," Bren warned, and Kendi poked him in the ribs with an elbow.

"Daniel Vik," said someone else. A stocky, blond man who looked barely old enough to shave appeared next to Irfan.

"Yin Ping," said Willa, barely loud enough to be heard. An Asian man with silvering black hair puffed into being. The cla.s.s continued calling out names until the full roster of the first human Silent was complete. Kendi didn't contribute. His mind alternated between thoughts about his family brought on by the hologram of the colony s.h.i.+p and thoughts of Pitr brought on by nothing in particular. A gentle breeze moved through the open window, smelling of leaves and bark.

"After it was determined that humans could indeed enter the Dream," Bren said, "Irfan Qasad consulted with a group of geneticists, both human and Ched-Balaar, and they determined that the current gene pool didn't carry enough genes for Silence-though they didn't call it that yet-to ensure the trait would continue. The Margery Daw Margery Daw carried a great many frozen human embryos, however, and they decided to alter some of them for Silence. Unfortunately, it turned out that the Silent don't develop well in artificial wombs. They just wither and die. No one knows exactly why. You'll learn more about that when you take biology." carried a great many frozen human embryos, however, and they decided to alter some of them for Silence. Unfortunately, it turned out that the Silent don't develop well in artificial wombs. They just wither and die. No one knows exactly why. You'll learn more about that when you take biology."

Utang's blue eyes. Pitr's hazel ones. Slapping mosquitoes, catching frogs. Falling from the roof, grasping Pitr's hand. Writhing in pain under snapping silver bands.

" ...do know that she married Daniel Vik and eventually had three children," Bren said. "Two of them were Silent. Much of the rest of her history is up in the air. Vik did kidnap the eldest boy and disappear, probably to Othertown, since that's where he turned up later. The question is, why did he do it? Some records from the time hint that Vik suffered from depression and paranoid delusions. That he had some kind of fight with Irfan herself is almost certain, but what could possibly have ..."

Little Martina crying in her slave square. Dad's face contorted with pain as he reached for Mom's hand. The flying dinosaur's stabbing beak. Pitr's laugh. Festival.

" ...appears that Irfan lied to him about their children. It's possible Vik knew they weren't his kids. A surviving fragment from his own writings says, 'My children don't share my genes,' which seems to be pretty clear. At any rate, he whipped the government of Othertown into a frenzy. Not all humans on Bellerophon liked the Silent, and a fair number of Ched-Balaar thought bringing humans into the Dream in the first place was a mistake. Vik was building a powder keg, and Othertown was almost ready to declare genocide against the Silent, even though Vik himself was ..."

He would do it tonight, talk to Pitr at the festival tonight. After all, Pitr didn't seem to be the type to get angry. He had always looked gentle to Kendi, anyway. But how would would he react? he react?

" ...used the Dream to perform research together, even though they were on different planets and separated by light years of empty s.p.a.ce. As a team, they discovered slips.p.a.ce and how to use it. So you could also say that Irfan had a hand in the discovery of slips.p.a.ce, since she was the one to spearhead interplanetary communication through the Dream. Of course, it was slips.p.a.ce and slips.h.i.+ps that allowed Vik to get his hands on weapons powerful enough to ..."

Pup's eyes going flat, his body going stiff. Rejection in his eyes to words Kendi hadn't quite said. What if the same thing happened with Pitr? Kendi didn't think he could face that.

" ...resigned from her post as governor in a cloud of scandal, and the question went unanswered. Did Irfan order the a.s.sa.s.sination of the governor of Othertown or did he truly commit ..."

The room seemed suddenly close and stifling, despite the open window. Kendi abruptly found he couldn't sit still. He needed to move, to- " ...you think, Kendi?"

Kendi looked up, startled. Bren, Jeren, Willa, and everyone else in the room were staring at him expectantly. He scrambled to remember what Sister Bren had asked but couldn't do it. "What?"

"Do you think Irfan ordered the a.s.sa.s.sination of the governor of Othertown?" Bren repeated patiently.

Kendi shrugged. Who cared?

"Well, it's your homework essay-all of you," Bren said. "There's half an hour left for cla.s.s. Log into the system and start your research now. Work with a partner, if you want. I'm really interested in what you come up with, so turn them in tomorrow morning, all right?"

The cla.s.s groaned but got out their data pads. Holographic screens popped up all over the room. Kendi got out his own pad, and Sister Bren moved among the cla.s.s, pointing out places to find both information and speculation. Several students teamed up with partners. Kendi's restlessness grew. It felt like he was back in his slave square, hemmed in on all sides.

"Wannaworktogether?" Kite blurted.

"I have to get out of here," Kendi muttered. And when Sister Bren's back was turned, he slipped out the door.

Outside, the alternating patches of warm sunlight and cool shade felt much better than the confining cla.s.sroom. Kendi heaved a sigh of relief in the bright, free air and trotted across the boards. After a moment, he sped up until he was running, all but flying over the walkways. A rope ladder caught his eye and he climbed it to a long balcony that ran the length of the building. Through the windows he saw what appeared to be a series of offices. Brown-clad humans and blond-furred Ched-Balaar worked at desks or reclined on couches and pillows. Kendi a.s.sumed the latter were in the Dream.

A set of stairs at the end of the balcony lead downward, and Kendi found himself on a wide platform where a life-sized statue of Irfan carved in gray marble stood on a pedestal. Pots of red and blue flowers had been placed at the base. Kendi paused to examine the statue. Irfan was lifting a hand in front of her as if about to accept a gift, and her face had a determined cast to it. A scroll was carved on the pedestal. At the top were the words "The Wisdom of Irfan," and it was inscribed with a series of sayings:

1.A serene mind is a strong mind.

2. The Dream is no less real than what we call reality.

3.We are but caretakers of the eternal Dream. We are but caretakers of the eternal Dream.

4. You must be a person first and Silent second.

5. The greater your knowledge, the smaller your risk.

6. You may gain, but not at someone else's expense.

7. Your mind should be open, but your mouth should be closed.

8. The universe provides, we distribute.

9. Pay forward, not back.

10. The real world becomes the Dream.

Kendi read the first one aloud. "A serene mind is a strong mind." Then his mind must be weak indeed. The restlessness grew stronger. Despite Mother Ara's earlier warning, Kendi used a balcony railing to clamber up to the roof of the building and from there climb into the branches of the talltree. His bare feet found easy purchase on the rough bark. The tree flatted as it went up, and eventually Kendi was able to poke his head up out of the green foliage.

The sun shone down gold between fluffy white clouds. Small animals chirped in the leaves around him, and a hawk-like bird coasted overhead. Kendi watched it pa.s.s. It felt as if he could take another step upward and fly himself. He grinned. The sky reminded him of the endless Outback, though the sun was considerably kinder. Bellerophon was a good place.

He climbed down a ways and lounged comfortably at the juncture of two thick branches. It was like being in a green cave, cool and leafy. Birds and small lizards chirruped at each other as they darted about hunting insects. A clump of dead twigs and branches had gathered where the wide branch met the talltree trunk, presumably blown or fallen there. Kendi selected a straight piece half as long as his own leg and a few centimeters in diameter. He turned it over in his hands for a moment, then produced a folding knife from his pocket and fell to whittling it. Some of the strangeness of it all washed over him. His birthplace was countless light-years away and almost a thousand years in the past, but here he was, sitting in a giant tree on a planet where humans worked with aliens to enter the Dream.

Were the Dream and the Dreamtime the same thing? Kendi tried to think, wis.h.i.+ng he had paid more attention to the stories told by the Real People Reconstructionists. The Dreamtime was the source of everything, a place outside s.p.a.ce and time. A part of every living creature was there, and there were those among the original tribes of Real People who had learned to walk its paths. This sounded a bit like the Dream. The original Real People had also used Head Talk-telepathy, Kendi supposed-for communication in a climate where a constantly-open mouth could lead to dehydration, and the Dream as Mother Ara explained it was used for communication among mutants.

The knife continued its work, though Kendi's mind lay elsewhere. The Real People Reconstructionists had always maintained that Aboriginal culture was the pinnacle of human accomplishment, that the reason mutants could no longer enter the Dreamtime or use Head Talk was because they had left the ancient ways for a more materialistic state. The same had happened to the Real People themselves after being forcibly separated from their ancient way of life until their descendants had forgotten the Dreamtime completely. When people came to realize the foolishness of such a life, they would find it once again.

Kendi snorted. They seemed to have found it just fine without changing one bit. Of course, the Real People hadn't known about the Ched-Balaar or what could be accomplished through genetic engineering.

The problem was that Kendi couldn't seem to get the hang of it. He had gone through several meditation exercise sessions with Mother Ara, but it always felt wrong for him, somehow. The couch felt lumpy and strange, and his mind always wandered during the sessions instead of becoming calm and clear. Willa, Jeren, and Kite all said they could calm themselves right down, but Kendi couldn't seem to get the trick of it. Why?

The knife closed, seemingly of its own accord, and Kendi looked down at the stick. It had become a short spear, complete with sharpened tip. Kendi ran his hands up and down the shaft. A few splinters here and there, but nothing a little sandpaper couldn't take care of. Why had he made it? It was as if something had guided his hands. Kendi looked at it for a long moment, then gave a little smile of recognition and of happiness.

With a grunt of annoyance, Ara shut down the data pad. Her holographic screen winked out, and she ran a tired hand over her face. The sun had moved away from her home office window and the room had cooled nicely. It was scant comfort.

Ara sighed. There were simply no other clues to be found. She had gone over every report, every image, every fact, and she couldn't find anything the Guardians might have missed. Somewhere out there was a madman who was killing Silent, and Ara was becoming more and more determined to find him. Part of her said she should leave the hunt to the Guardians, but another part of her, one with a louder voice, yammered that it was her duty to help in whatever way she could. After all, which was more urgent-saving Silent from a slaver or saving Silent from a killer? Not only that, the killer might go after someone Ara knew-her mother or her sister or her niece.

Unfortunately, Ara had the chill feeling that the only way to get further information was wait for the killer to strike again and hope for more clues.

At least Ben would be safe. Not only was he male, he wasn't Silent. At least, not in any way that counted. She looked at the hologram of Ben, taken at age ten, that sat on her desk. His blue eyes were merry, his smile a bit mischievous. He looked nothing like her, of course. Several years ago Ara and a team of Children had been exploring what they thought was a derelict pirate vessel found in orbit around a gas giant. It hadn't been quite derelict, though the s.h.i.+p's only inhabitants hadn't been aware of much. They were a series of embryos frozen in a cryo-unit that had been missed or left behind for some other reason. The readout said the embryos were Silent.

Ara took them back to Bellerophon with her, indeed held the unit on her lap for most of the trip home. Twelve viable, motherless embryos found exactly at a time when Ara's arms ached to hold a baby. Ara's doctor chose one at random for implantation. That left the others still frozen, but Ara didn't want more than one. Nine months later, Ben was born, and Ara thought she would burst with happiness. Even when he showed no awareness of the Dream by age ten, eleven, twelve, and onward, Ara still loved him. She couldn't help but feel disappointment and not a little guilt, though. Was it her fault? Had she done something wrong during her pregnancy? Or during Ben's early development? Or was it because he had spent over a decade in frozen limbo? No one could give her an answer.

Now, however, it was an advantage. She wouldn't have to worry about him being killed.

The familiar sound of the front door opening came to her, followed by the equally familiar sound of Ben's footsteps. She checked the clock. School was out already? She had been working longer than she'd thought. Definitely time for a break. Ara left her office and headed for the kitchen because that was the first room Ben usually hit after school these days.

She found him staring into the open refrigerator.

"Hey, Mom," he said distractedly. "There's nothing to eat."

"Hey, yourself," she said. "Then close the door."

Ben obeyed and, with a put-upon sigh, began to rummage through the cupboards. His data pad peeked out from his back pocket, and Ara abruptly found that endearingly cute, a boyish gesture on someone who was all-too-rapidly becoming a man. When he turned around with a box of crackers, she swept him into a hug.

"Mom!" he protested. "Geez."

"Think of it as your room and board payment," she told him, stepping back. "How was school?"