Scheming Villainess's Counterattack? Chapter 1

Day One of Rebirth

Sunday, September 2, 2018- Cloudy

I am a vicious wife. Three days earlier, I was reborn.

Ever since I was young, I fell in love with the prince charming next door, Nan Shen. That's right, prince charming was just that sort of a deal, as even the name was chosen was a h.o.m.ophone*. Hey hey, we're getting off-topic. If things progressed normally, a boy and a girl playing together as childhood friends would secretly fall for one another. If Nan Shen secretly loved me, I would certainly be the female lead. But in truth, I was unable to get Nan Shen. Orz

All of this had to be blamed on that little s.l.u.t, Bai LianHua. That's right, you did not misread, Bai LianHua's name is white lotus flower. From such a disgusting name, it's clear what sort of green tea b.i.t.c.h she is. To keep from disgusting myself, from this moment forward, I will call her little s.l.u.t Bai.

Now, let me reminisce about the sequence of events (crossed out) process of what had happened.

Nan Shen and I were childhood sweethearts, and his family lived just across from my family. Our relations.h.i.+p was so good that we wore the same dress. That's right, you did not misread. It was dress and not pants. Don't look at how Nan Shen puts on airs after growing up. When he was still young, he was not even as tall as me. Every day, before going out to play, he would steal my dress to wear. Without any clothes to wear, I could only wear his pants. When he was young, he looked very beautiful. Those who did not know him would not even be able to tell that guy was a male. However… there also weren't any could recognize that I was a girl… I must say that I clearly was not ugly though? In any case, I was once a flower of a cla.s.s!

I won't bring it up again. Just thinking about it makes me feel sick. Let's continue writing~

Nan Shen and I happily spent the twelve years from birth to our first year of middle school. It truly was too joyous~ Just like all p.u.b.escent girls, I began to take notice of differences between the male and female bodies that year. One time after school, when Nan Shen and I were bathing together, I suddenly grabbed his p.e.n.i.s and stupidly asked: “Why do I not have a p.e.n.i.s. I also want a p.e.n.i.s.” After saying this, I even idiotically let him see my x.x.x that did not have a p.e.n.i.s. Very well, thinking back on it now, I feel very ashamed.

That day was the first time that Nan Shen slapped my hand away. With a bright-red face, he said to me: “You are a girl, idiot! How could a girl have a p.e.n.i.s! Did you properly pay attention during health studies?! I don't want to bathe with you ever again!”

Thus this old woman, I, lost my greatest advantage in this life. Though I have been reborn, why could I not have been reborn to the day before I grabbed Nan Shen's p.e.n.i.s?! But complaining is pointless.

During the three years of middle school, I became engrossed in playing games without a care, while Nan Shen studied properly and improved himself with each day. In the school rankings, he had left me behind by a large margin. If one went to the announcements board, he was steadily in first. As for me, I was always steadily first from the bottom. In third year of middle school, advancing to the next level of school became a pressing matter. Under pressure from my mom and dad, I caught up on math, English, physics, chemistry and biology. Reality proved that I was still quite smart. Just looking things over was enough to get over the minimum requirements for the high school division.

I forgot to mention that my school had all three divisions, elementary, middle, and high, together. Advancing from middle school to high school, one needed 250 points overall to be ok~ But if someone from outside the school wanted to get into the high school through an examination, they needed to be in the top 100. Thus I became the first one to enter the high school division with 250 points since the founding of the school~ Just thinking about it, I feel that I was extremely fortunate~

However, on the day of the entrance ceremony, little s.l.u.t Bai appeared. Speaking of the entrance ceremony… s.h.i.+t! WTFS!** Isn't the entrance ceremony tomorrow? I'm going to sleep. No more writing. I will continue tomorrow!

That having been said, how exactly is “WTFS” read? Hah, forget it. Quickly off to bed to rest my mind. I need to show that little s.l.u.t Bai what for tomorrow!

Author's note: Testing the waters with yuri.

*TN: Prince charming in Chinese is p.r.o.nounced the same as Nan Shen (南申) but uses the characters for male G.o.d (男神)

**TN: 我屮艸芔茻 is the original text. This is an elaborate way of saying “s.h.i.+t!” It's a derivative of 我艹 (I gra.s.s). Each character of 屮艸芔茻 is something related to gra.s.s.