Why Marry? Part 27

HELEN

Wait, I'll get rid of them!

[_She sits and begins to make tea._

ERNEST

I've had my tea, thanks.

HELEN

Stupid! Sit down. [_Indicates a chair close to hers. He takes it cautiously._] We'll have a little fun with them in a minute.

[_She is busy now making tea._

THEODORE

[_to LUCY and the JUDGE apart_]

You may be right, Uncle Everett, but upon my word it is the strangest courts.h.i.+p I ever witnessed.

LUCY

They ought to be spanked.

JUDGE

Don't worry, old Mother Nature will attend to that.

LUCY

Well, I may be old-fas.h.i.+oned, but----

JUDGE

[_interrupting_]

But this is merely a new fas.h.i.+on, my dear Lucy. Nature her ancient custom holds, let science say what it will.

HELEN

[_handing cup to ERNEST with a glance at the others_]

Now, then, be attentive to me. [_He leans toward her rather shyly, abashed by her nearness. She makes eyes at him reproachfully._] Oh, can't you be more attentive than that? [_She acts like a coquette and he looks into her beautiful eyes and while he is doing so she says with a fascinating drawl_] Now tell me a-all about anterior poliomyelitis!

ERNEST

[_suddenly taken aback, he laughs_]

Nothing doing since you left.

[_And bends close to explain._

LUCY

If you'll excuse me, Doctor Hamilton, I always take forty winks before dressing. We dine at eight.

[_Going, she signals to the others. ERNEST and HELEN exchange smiles._

THEODORE

[_laughing, to LUCY_]

Ss't! Don't tell John what's going on! Keep him busy telephoning. [_LUCY nods excitedly and almost runs to obey the Church._] Helen, if you and Ernest will excuse me, I really must write to Mary.

[_Their shoulders are close together and they seem too absorbed to reply. THEODORE smiles down upon them and signals the JUDGE to come along. The JUDGE, however, shakes his head but waves THEODORE into the house. Uncle Everett looks at the lovers with quizzical interest. He draws near and eavesdrops shamelessly._

HELEN

You oughtn't to have dropped the polio experiments.

ERNEST

You oughtn't to have dropped me--right in the _midst_ of the experiments. Those agar plates you were incubating dried up and spoiled. You played the very devil with my data.

JUDGE

G.o.d bless my soul! what are we coming to?

HELEN

[_without turning_]

It's perfectly proper for your little ears, uncle, only you can't understand a word of it. Won't _any_ one play billiards with you?